Chapter 4 #3
"Well, who I am to get in the way of campus safety, bro? I'm happy to give up my seat for West Pine Batman." He packs up his things and then stands, turning to me. "Oh shit, you're Porn Girl."
Some of the other students who turned to watch the exchange laugh while others whisper, pointing at me.
That's pretty much par for the course, isn't it? Elias gets to be Batman, and I'm Porn Girl. My cheeks burn.
"Uh, I mean, sorry. I'm sure you're very nice," he says before turning to Elias and offering him a fist bump. "Thank you for your service."
Elias sits in the seat, sprawls out, and smiles.
"What the hell was that?"
"Well, some people," he says, "are grateful that I fought off the bad guy and saved you, Saige. They think I'm a hero. And you know what? I've saved your life three times now, and I deserve a little credit, so I think I've earned the title."
"No. You don't get any credit for saving me from situations you put me in to begin with. Remove the title."
He shrugs, leaning into me. "It's not that easy. The people have spoken. They've overruled you—the voice of treason."
"Whatever," I snap, taking out my laptop. "You know, you can't just do this."
"Do what?"
"Act like nothing happened."
"Oh, I don't want to act like nothing happened. Trust me, I haven't stopped thinking about how tight your pussy felt around my dick that night or how fucking well you took it. You can't act like that didn't happen."
I know I can't, but I want to. I swallow hard, squeezing my thighs together. "I hate you."
"Yeah, I'm sure that's what you tell yourself when you think about it, too. But I bet it doesn't stop you from slipping your fingers into your panties, don't you, baby?"
"You're sick. I'm not doing this with you."
He reaches for my chin, turning me to face him before pale green eyes lock onto mine. "I'm never going to let you go," he says, his voice softer, like it was in my bed the other night.
I quickly jerk away. "Well, that's horrifying."
"I don't mind if I scare you, Saige. I scare myself sometimes. Just know that as long as you're mine, you don't have to be afraid of anything else. And you're always going to be mine."
"I've never been yours."
"You know that's not true." He sinks down in his chair and moves closer, his lips brushing against my ear. "You were mine the first time I sank my teeth into your flesh. You were mine when you came screaming on my dick. And you're still mine now."
I remember him leaning into me like this, pinning me onto my side while he fucked me, grunting into my ear with each brutal thrust. I remember the feral look in his eyes.
The pulse between my legs becomes unbearable.
"I think you're having a break from reality. It's really concerning."
He laughs a little. "Okay, Saige. Just know that every time you fight me, you're making it worse for yourself.
I'm going to have to take it out on your pussy.
But then again, that might be what you want.
Is it? Do you want to be punished? If that's the case, I think you know that I'm happy to bend you over my knee anytime. "
I swallow hard. "It's not going to happen, Elias."
"Yeah, it is, Saige."
"All right, everyone," Professor Whitman says. "Sorry, we're getting a little bit of a late start, but I do have somewhat of an announcement."
I think my heart stops in that moment. All the color drains from my face as Miles takes a seat behind the desk at the front of the room.
He looks different; he doesn't have a beard anymore, and I don't think I would have recognized him if Kira hadn't mentioned it last night. A scar runs from his scalp down his forehead and through his eyebrow.
It must have happened in the current.
"This is my assistant, Miles Hayes. You may have heard he took an unfortunate sabbatical at the start of the semester, which he does not wish to answer questions about, but because of the circumstances, Miles has decided to repeat some of the coursework for his graduate thesis, which includes assisting in this course. "
His eyes lock on mine, and I can't look away. I convince myself that if I stare long enough, I'll see something that'll tell me whether he's lying or not.
But his eyes are vacant. There's nothing there.
I jump as Elias's hand covers my own.
"Calm down." He traces circles against my palm with his thumb. "You're okay. Stop looking at him."
I duck behind my screen. "He doesn't look like he's been in a fight," I whisper.
"No. But neither do you, really. It's been weeks." He must see the panic in my eyes and adds, "Hey, fuck him. He can't touch you. No one hurts you but me."
I nod, finding it comforting before I realize what's happening and then, glaring, jerk my hand away. "Just leave me alone."
"…If you haven't turned in your essays, you have until midnight tonight to do so."
"Did you turn in your essay?" Elias asks.
"Yes," I hiss. "Why do you care?"
"You know why, Saige. Hey, you know what, though? You're right; you're not a murderer anymore. That's good news, isn't it?"
I look up, just enough to glimpse at Miles over the top of my laptop, and I'm not quite sure.
I think I liked it better when he was dead.
"Stop trying to make me feel better. Take some notes or something. I'm not a murderer anymore, so I don't owe you shit."
Elias laughs, but he doesn't say anything else.
The hour passes painstakingly slowly. I stay like that—slouched in my seat, hiding behind my screen—for the rest of class.
But not Elias. He's in his usual form—his giant ass sprawling across both of our seats and the one beside him. He doesn't take out his laptop; he doesn't take notes.
He sits with his gaze fixed on Miles the entire time. He doesn't take his eyes off him. I remember how afraid he was of Elias that night in their townhouse; I know how it feels to have Elias's gaze on me like that.
I hope it scares the shit out of him.
I keep my head down while I pack up my things and leave the lecture hall.
"Elias?" I ask once we reach the hallway.
"What is it, baby?"
My lip turns up, but I choose to ignore the pet name. "What are we going to do?"
"Nothing. Not yet, anyway."
"Maybe he's telling the truth. If he wanted to hurt me, why would he come back like this? Why would he…reveal himself?"
"I don't know…yet. But he's not telling the truth."
"Well, how I am supposed to sit there for the rest of the semester?!" I ask, my tone a harsh whisper.
"We're in the home stretch," he says, shrugging.
"We just have to get through these last few weeks.
And I'm going to watch him. I'll wait for him to slip up; you know he's fucking scared of me.
Once that happens, and I know he's lying about the amnesia and he was the one who attacked you, we'll take care of it. "
"We?"
"Yeah, me, Nolan…and Dax. We'll end it."
"End it how?"
"In a very final way. I'll get creative. You know I can be creative. I meant what I said before—no one hurts you but me."
Biting my lower lip to keep it from quivering, I nod. Elias places both hands on my cheeks, and I let him.
"I wish you'd come back to the house, Saige. I can protect you."
"I'm not going to do that."
"Just wait. I'm going to prove that I'm worthy of you."
"I don't want you to do that, Elias. I don't want you."
"Hey, what are you doing this afternoon?" he asks, ignoring me.
"What's all this?"
My heart drops into my stomach. Instantly, I step away from Elias and turn to face Dax for the first time since Halloween.
And Nolan was right. I don't think I wanted to know how he was doing, because he doesn't look good. He looks disheveled, sick, even—like maybe he's still drunk from the night before—with bags under his eyes.
Still, it hits me right in the center of my chest—in that empty, heavy space he left that just makes me so fucking tired.
Part of me wants to melt into him. I want to scream, Don't you see how well we fit? Why can't you just love me?
But I know I can't do that. I'm tired of surviving things; I don't have it in me to do it again.
"W-what are you doing here?"
"I wanted to see you. You won't talk to me, and I know your class schedule. Didn't expect to find you all cozy with Elias, though."
"I'm not cozy with him, I—"
"You know what? I don't care. Can we just go somewhere and talk? I brought you something to eat." He holds out a cardboard container. "It's your favorite—from that place we went together in Mount Pleasant."
He went all the way to Mount Pleasant this morning to get that for me?
No. Don't fall for it.
I shake my head. "I don't want it. I don't want to talk. I don't think there's anything left to say."
"Saige, please. Just give me five minutes. That's all I want."
"I can't. I can't do it anymore. I don't want to talk to you."
I watch his dark eyes shift from hurt to pure rage.
Dax laughs. "Well, that's just fucking great, isn't it?" He slams the cardboard container into the garbage can beside him, hard enough that it makes me jump back. "Jesus fucking Christ, Saige, I did everything for you!"
"Dax…" Elias cautions, moving to my side. "Back off."
"And he…" he says, pointing to Elias, "he's the one who hurt you—not me. He turned you against me. He abused you; he fucking assaulted you, and you're just…you're just fine with him now, huh? You're going to be a couple or some shit?"
"I'm not fine with him!" I shout. "We're not a couple! We're just talking!"
"Talking! What a fucking concept!"
"I'm not doing this."
"You can't take him from me, Saige! That's not how this works!"
"I'm not trying to take him from you!"
"Bullshit! That's exactly what you're doing."
I scoff. "I knew this wasn't about me. You don't care about me." I blink back tears. "You threw me away, Dax…just like Elias said you would! I may have let you use me like a toy, but I won't be someone's trash."
"Yeah? What do you think you are to your brother?"
"All right," Elias says. "We're done with this. Let's go, Saige."
"Oh, what a fucking hero! Here to save the day, huh, Batman? Next time, make sure he doesn't have a camera on, Saige."
Elias grabs my arm, gentling turning me in the other direction and guiding me down the hall, away from Dax. "I didn't turn that camera on. I didn't do that. You know that, right?"
I ignore him, but stay by his side. It's not that I want to go with him, but I'm so close to having a fucking breakdown, and I need to get out of there. Resisting the urge to look back, I walk with Elias's heavy arm over my shoulders.
Until I smell something…burning.
"Oh, my god! You're on fire! He set you on fire!"
The voice comes from behind me. Instantly, I shrug off my backpack and let it fall to the floor, watching it burn on the tile as people scream and scatter in all directions.
Just as quickly, Elias grabs it by the top handle and darts into the bathroom, returning a couple of minutes later, the bag singed and dripping with water.
He must have thrown it in the toilet. My laptop is toast.
"Hey, it's West Pine Batman!" someone shouts. "He saved the day again!"
Elias holds my backpack over his head, and the hallway erupts in cheers.
But I don't. I push through the crowd of my peers, many of whom have their phones out to take photos and videos of Elias, and head for the door.
I can't believe Dax did that to me. But then again, I should, shouldn't I? He's done it before.
"Hey!" Elias says once he catches up with me in the quad. "Sorry about that."
"What part? Your adoring fans, or your best friend catching me on fire again?
"I'm not sorry about the fans. I'll talk to Dax."
I sneer. "Yeah, I don't think that's really going to help."
"I'll tell him he owes you a new computer."
"I still have one of his credit cards. I'll take care of it myself."
I'll get myself an upgrade. In fact, I think I could use a lot of new things. I'm not feeling as picky as I was the last time I went shopping.
"Hey—about this afternoon. Do you want to—"
I cut him off. "Nope. I absolutely don't." I snatch my ruined backpack and hold it against my chest. At least I had my hair pulled up this time. "I'm going to grab something to eat, and then I'm going back to my room. Don't follow me."
Of course, he doesn't listen, but at least he keeps his distance. I glare at him across the food court, where he leans against a support beam, only partially obscured from view, while I choke down ramen.
I see him in the reflection of the glass doors when I finally return to the residence hall.
As angry as it makes me, I have to admit, I feel safe.