Chapter 4
CHAPTER 4
CASSIE
“ W hen are you going to cook the dish you learned how to cook the other day?”
I wanted to roll my eyes. I wasn’t in the greatest mood, and I just wanted to get my homework done so I could relax. “I don’t know, Mesani. Let me finish my work, and I’ll go in there to chill with you for a little while before bed.”
“My bad. Okay.”
He didn’t affect my mood. I just missed Kendrall. Later that night, my dad had told me that Kendrall had said hello. I’d nearly given myself away, because just at the mention of his name, my body shuddered. The man’s attention to my body was unforgettable, but his attention to me as a woman was damn near unattainable. Not even Mesani knew everything about me and my thought process.
I’d forgotten my parents were going to Nome that evening. Had I remembered, I wouldn’t have been within ten miles of that place. Thankfully, Kendrall lived in Henderson Village, which was a community slash neighborhood. The entrance to it was on the main highway, but the houses weren’t visible from the highway since it was surrounded by a brick wall. Mr. Kenny lived on that same highway. If I would have left a little earlier, they would have seen me leaving. That wouldn’t have been good.
When I got home that evening, Mesani had asked so many questions about where I’d been. He said he forgot, but I wanted to believe that he was pretending. At the sight of him, I originally felt guilty about fucking around on him, but I allowed that feeling to dissipate. What I had with Kendrall was so much deeper than just fucking around. While guilt was originally keeping me here, it wasn’t the reason I was still here, taking care of his ass.
The real reason was that I knew he would press charges against me. He had up to three years to do so. It would be a felony charge, because I used the vase as a weapon. I didn’t have anger issues, but seeing him in the act made me snap. I wasn’t a violent person. That scene would play out very differently in court, though. He would make me out to be the bad person.
I glanced at my phone, desperately wanting to hear Kendrall’s voice. We’d texted back and forth earlier while I was on campus, and he’d invited me out to his competition this weekend. I always wanted to call it a rodeo, but he said that wasn’t what they were called. My dad had already told me about it, but I didn’t give him a definite answer. He’d invited Mesani as well. There was no way I would be taking Mesani with me to watch Kendrall compete. No way in hell.
I told Kendrall that I didn’t think I would be attending this time, because Dad had invited Mesani. I couldn’t do that to him. That would be cold. I loved him too much for that. I couldn’t even focus on school this past week, and I was at the point of taking a break after this semester. My mind was consumed with how I could leave Mesani without fear of retaliation. Things just weren’t the same between us, and I knew it was because of what had happened, but more importantly, my love for Kendrall.
I lowered my face to my hands as my phone vibrated on the desk. Taking a deep breath, I picked it up and saw it was a message from my sister. She was ten years younger than me… my brother too. They were twins. Can you call me, sis?
I really didn’t have time to call her, but it wasn’t like we got to talk often. I shut my computer down for the night then called her. “Hey, sis,” she said when she answered.
“Hey, Ebony. What’s up?”
“Not too much. Are you going to Kendrall’s thing this weekend? Did Daddy tell you about it? I want to go, but I don’t wanna be there with just him and Mama. Evan isn’t going because of something he has going on at work.”
“No. I’m not going. At least, I don’t think I am. I have way too much work to catch up on.”
“Aww. Okay. Well, I guess I won’t be going. It’s not like Kingsley’s fine ass will be there.”
“What? You’re messing around with Kingsley?”
Kingsley was one of Kendrall’s younger brothers. He was probably three years younger than Ebony. All their names started with Ks, just like their parents. Well, Keisha’s first name may have been LaKeisha, but she simply went by Keisha.
“Girl, I wish. I was just gonna go so I could see him. I went to dinner at their house with Mama and Daddy, and he said he wouldn’t be there because he was going to help one of their cousins at another rodeo. Kane might be there, but he isn’t twenty-one yet. I need somebody that’s completely legal.”
I laughed loudly at her crazy ass. “Well, if I change my mind, I’ll let you know,” I said as I stood from my seat to walk out of the office.
I walked right into Mesani. He had a slight frown on his face, and I could only hope we weren’t about to get into it about something.
“Okay, sis. Don’t forget to let me know one way or the other. Talk to you later.”
“Okay, Ebony. Bye.”
I ended the call, and he said, “I thought you were working.”
“I was. I answered the phone as I was wrapping up for the night.”
“Oh. I was like, how she in here laughing and shit on the phone when she told me she was busy.”
I gave him a one-sided smile. “So what are you in here doing?” I asked as I headed to the front room.
“Nothing. I was watching this shit your daddy was talking about on YouTube. This shit look boring as hell.”
I looked at the TV to see it was what Kendrall did at the competitions. “You don’t want to go?”
“Hell naw. You still planning to go?”
“I might.”
“Well, you can go without me.”
I wanted to say, That would be right up my alley , but I was able to restrain myself as I watched the TV. I’d seen Kendrall practice when we were younger. I could only imagine how good at it he was now. I sat on the couch as he flipped the TV back to cable. We were quiet for a moment as he channel surfed. My mind had gone straight to Kendrall. I needed to talk to him. Mesani gave me just the opportunity I needed.
“Do you know if we have any more Tylenol or Advil?”
“No, I don’t think we do. You have a headache?”
“Yeah. It isn’t bad, but I don’t want it to get that way. I’m gonna go to the store right quick. You wanna ride?”
“Naw. I think I’m just gonna take a shower while you’re gone.”
“A’ight. Have that pussy ready for me when I get back. It’s been almost a week.”
I gave him a slight smile, but I really wasn’t in the mood. The sex was good, but he wasn’t Kendrall. The minute he left out and I heard his car crank up, I called Kendrall. The minute he answered, he said, “Damn. Hey, baby.”
“Hey. Damn is right. I missed hearing your voice.”
“I missed yours too. You been okay?”
“Yeah. Just working hard and studying harder. What about you?”
“I’m okay. Just getting ready for the competition Saturday. I really wish you could come.”
“Me too,” I said, not bothering to tell him I might be able to go.
“How were you able to call me?”
“He went to the store.”
“Can I see you before I leave? I mean… I really wish I could take you to dinner or something. Maybe I can bring dinner to us tomorrow night if you can come out.”
“Thursday would be pushing it. How about Friday?”
“Okay. Let me know by tomorrow so I can put some things in motion. I would have to get someone else to cook it, though, because a nigga can barely boil water.”
I chuckled. “How, Kendrall? Your mom and dad can both cook.”
“I wasn’t paying attention, and they never made me cook on my own like Mama did with Karima. When we get married, you gon’ have to do the cooking until you can teach me. Then we’ll cook together.”
My heart was melting. The man was talking about marriage, and here I was engaged to someone else. I was such a fuck up. A single tear trickled down my cheek as I slowly shook my head. I supposed I’d been quiet for too long, because he asked in a soft voice, “You still there, baby?”
“I’m here. I feel like I’m wasting time, but I promise I have a legitimate reason why I haven’t made any moves just yet.”
“Cassie, I trust you, but if it’s something I can help with, just tell me.”
“I don’t think you can.”
“You never know, but I’ll let you see what you come up with. It hasn’t been a whole week yet, although it feels like longer. I can’t wait to see you.”
“I can’t wait to see you either, Kendrall.” When I heard the car door close, I said, “I have to go, baby. He’s back.”
“Okay. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
I ended the call and quickly ran to the bathroom and started the shower. That was where I was supposed to be, but I lost all train of thought when I was talking to Kendrall. I quickly stripped out of my clothes and hopped in the shower, soaped my loofah at record speeds, and began washing my body. I was moving so quickly I got my damn hair wet because I’d forgotten to put on my shower cap. I had to calm down if I didn’t want to get caught. After taking a couple of deep breaths, I finished washing myself and got out of the shower.
When I did, I grabbed the towel just as Mesani came into the bathroom. He scanned me from head to toe and licked his lips. I smiled at him, but he completely wiped the smile off my face when he asked, “Who is Kendrall?”
My heart rate was sprinting like it was the last leg of a relay, and my body temperature increased tremendously. I opened my mouth to speak, but before I could, he said, “And don’t lie. If this is about some get back shit, I guess I understand, but it ain’t gon’ happen. You’re my fiancée, Cassie. I know I fucked up, but you forgave me, right?”
I nodded. I was at a loss for words. I didn’t know how he found out. The tears were stinging my eyes, but I couldn’t show vulnerability in front of him. Staring back at him, I sucked up my feelings and said, “I haven’t truly been happy, Mesani. I forgave you, but it’s hard to forget. Maybe we should just end things now. I’ve tried really hard to move on from it, but it’s just not working.”
He smiled slightly, and that made me nervous as hell. “So you fuck up my future and think I’m just gonna take that lying down? I will never be a psychologist. I won’t ever be able to be a professional anything, because it’s hard for me to even retain information… to learn the things I need to learn to get my degree or train for a job. You can either stay here with me or lose your future too.”
I knew what he meant. It was my biggest fear if I ever left him. He was going to file charges. Once again, I nodded. “How did you find out?”
“Don’t worry about all that. I expect you to block him from your phone too. I’ll know if you don’t.”
He left the bathroom and slammed the door. I quickly grabbed my phone and sent a text to Kendrall. I’m sorry. I fucked up. I have to block you.
My heart was crushed. The cries were threatening to leave my throat as he responded. I know.
I frowned, trying to figure out what he meant. Then it hit me. Mesani had called him.