Chapter 39
The wind had picked up,but it didn’t dampen my excitement even a little. Or maybe it was because Mickey Macguire was bouncing around like an over-enthusiastic puppy, which was kind of infectious.
It was track testing day, which meant I’d finally get to drive around a track for the first time in way too long. We were all in race suits, though they were just practice ones, and it felt so damn right on my body again.
My knee bounced where I sat beside Rocco, and he laughed. “If you two don’t stop, you’re going to need a nap before lunch time.”
Mickey looked at Rocco like his every word was a biblical revelation. Man, had I ever been that awestruck by another driver?
Uh, yeah.
“Don’t you still feel the excitement, Rocco? Or is it just because it’s an IndyCar and not a Formula One car?” Mickey asked.
Rocco shook his head. “I’m excited on the inside, kid. You’ll learn how to be excited or nervous or scared without giving it away to other drivers, or the media who’ll have their cameras in your face.” Rocco pulled me closer, his hand wrapping around my thigh to stop the bounce. “Every good racer knows that the race begins as soon as you arrive at the track. Nothing but confidence. You’re going to win every single time. And if you don’t win that time, you think about what you can change so you’ll win next time. It’s about the mind as much as about your skills behind the wheel.”
His hand slid further up my thigh, but Mickey didn’t notice, so focused on the words coming from Rocco’s mouth. I grinned, knowing he wasn’t just talking about driving. I grabbed his hand before it could get too not-safe-for-work, though I was saved from permanently scarring the young driver when Ari Rome shouted, “Mickey!”
I reached out and bumped the kid’s knuckles. “Be confident and all that shit, but remember to have fun too.”
He grinned, such a wide, innocent expression. “Will do, Tally.”
He jogged back into the garage, and I shook my head. He was nineteen, but I swear he’d lived and breathed racing for so long, he’d forgotten to have any social experience. The kid was about as socially inept as it gets, but he was sweet. It made me feel kind of maternal, which was insane considering I was only a couple of years older than him. Maybe it was motherhood.
With Mickey gone, Rocco pulled me closer and nuzzled my neck. “Are you excited, Stellina? Ready to be doing what you were born to do once more?”
I sighed happily. The only thing that could make today better was if I was starting, but I knew my limitations. I didn’t even have close to enough experience behind the wheel of a live IndyCar, so I wasn’t ready. But one day I would be, and then the world would know my name.
“Rocco!” someone called, and he kissed me softly and walked into the garage. “You too, Tally.”
I skipped into the garage and saw Hayes standing beside one of the backup machines. It wasn’t as fine-tuned as the starting cars, but it was still competitive. I stroked my hand up the side lovingly.
“Climb in, Tally. Let me know how it feels.”
My heart pounded in my chest as I climbed in, slipping into the cockpit like it was a glove. So different from a stock car. What if I fucked this up?
Hayes squatted down beside me, holding out a helmet. “This is just like old times, baby. You’re taking her out on a test lap, just to get a feel for it. We aren’t competing for pole or points.”
I nodded. We went over the rest of the checks and attached the steering wheel, then I was being pushed out onto the test track. I was glad they couldn’t see my face from my helmet, because I was grinning so wide that my face threatened to break.
I’m back, baby.
I sat and watched Mickey go around the track first, his twenty laps getting progressively faster and faster until he was flying past at unbelievable speeds. It was amazing to watch.
But when Rocco rolled out, it only took him two laps to get the feel of the car before he showed us all why he was getting paid the big dollars.
Why commentators had been calling him a once-in-a-generation driver for so long.
Why I’d had posters of him on my wall, though I’d never wanted to drive anything but NASCAR.
The guy was poetry behind the wheel. He made it look so smooth, so easy, like he was out for a Sunday drive rather than edging close to two hundred miles per hour. In practice. He was definitely getting laid tonight.
Forty laps later, he rolled back into the garages, and it was my turn. Ari Rome’s voice came over the radio. “Get your bearings, Tally, then put her through her paces.”
The car was started, and once everyone was clear, I pulled out onto the track. I rolled it around the course once.
“Everything feel okay?” Ari asked through my earbuds.
I fiddled a little with the tension in the back anti-roll bar, and it was fine. “Feels good.”
“Then green, green, green, make her go!”
I accelerated, my focus going to the track in front of me as I navigated the best lines. I’d studied this. I knew this track. Picking my lines into the corners, I got more and more confident as my speed increased and the scenery whipped by.
I was flying. This was magic.
Newton was a bit of an asshole when he said what goes up must come down. Sure, that was great for gravity, but it sucked when it came to emotions. After the pure elation of the test drive, getting a missed call from my family lawyer was like a lead weight there to drag me back down to Earth.
I waited until I got home to return her call, but I knew what it would be about. She’d given a copy of Bobbi-June’s DNA test to the Willtots’ lawyer, which meant everything could progress.
“Hello, Tally. How are things?” my lawyer, Serena, asked.
I slumped back against the office chair. “Fine, thanks.”
“That’s good. We have a court date for three weeks here in San Francisco, because it’s the baby’s home state. We’ve been assigned a judge, and honestly, he’s got a pretty good record for finding in favor of the mother. I shouldn’t have to say this, but I don’t think he’s easily bought either.”
I let out a mirthless laugh. Not easily bought definitely doesn’t mean he couldn’t be bought, but I’d take it. “Thanks, Serena.”
“No problem. Anything else I need to know?”
I chewed my lip. “Other than Brick having his private investigator following Jesse and the baby around town a couple of weeks ago, it’s all been pretty normal. Jesse might have threatened him a little, though, just in case they bring that up.” I’d told Serena almost immediately about Jesse and Hayes’s place in mine and the baby’s life. She had prepared against the idea that perhaps Brick’s lawyers would use it as some kind of indication of my morals. It helped that we all lived together, were in a committed relationship, and all wanted what was best for Bobbi-June. We just had to hope that the judge was open to some new-age ideas, otherwise it might go badly.
We talked over some other things for a little while, including the fact that Bobbi-June may technically be the beneficiary of Buck’s fortune, and his trust fund. I didn’t want his money, and if they thought they could buy my baby, they were insane.
I finished up my call with Serena and headed downstairs. By the sound of it, Bobbi-June was awake. When I made it to the ground floor, Hayes was holding her out. “Look at that head control, Mama. Tell me you’re the child of race car drivers without telling me. She’ll be able to drive in Formula One before you know it. Isn’t that right, Short Stack? You”re going to take the racing world by storm in seventeen years, aren’t you?” he cooed, and I shook my head.
“Maybe she’ll hate cars. Maybe she’ll want to be a librarian,” I teased.
Hayes sniffed. “Then she’ll be able to carry twelve books on her head, with this kind of neck control.”
Jesse laughed from the couch. “That’s not how librarians work. They have carts, and you know, hands?”
They bantered as I reached out to take Bobbi-June from his arms. One thing Brick would never be able to argue was that she wasn’t loved completely and unconditionally. The guys had stepped up more than I could’ve ever imagined, and for that, I was so damn thankful.
I kissed her fuzzy head. “In three weeks, no one will ever be able to take you, not even for a moment. You might not have a lot of blood relatives, but you won’t know anything but an absolute waterfall of love,” I murmured to her, and she grinned, flailing her hands around.
Jesse stood and kissed me. “How was the test drive?”
I grinned, rocking the baby a little in my arms. “It was… amazing.” I dropped my voice conspiratorially. “It might even be better than NASCAR.”
Hayes let out a fake gasp, clutching his imaginary pearls. “Better than NASCAR?” He smiled. “Nah, baby, you looked amazing out there. Plus, you were only marginally behind the lap times of Mickey. I swear, soon you won’t be a reserve driver; you’ll be third seat. Antony was eyeing your lap times, like he was wondering if he could have three horses in this race.”
Giddy at even the thought, I waved away the idea. “I’m not ready yet. But soon.”
I was a fighter, and I wasn’t giving up my dreams for anyone now. I could have my perfect life, and I would take down anyone who thought they could fuck with me.