18. Riley
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
RILEY
T he cool air dances across my cheeks and I pull my jacket a little tighter around my body as we step up to the glass. Nonna looks over at me, a bright smile on her face, before glancing at Nova and Posey. Posey bounces up and down in Nova’s arms, her little voice growing louder as she points to Lincoln by the bench.
Nova asked me if I wanted to come with her and Nonna tonight to watch the guys. I haven’t been to a game recently and it’s nice getting out of the house for some time with my best friend. Nonna is practically one of the girls, anyway.
“Here he comes!” Posey exclaims, jerking her arm in the direction of Lincoln. A smile lifts my lips as I watch Nova move closer to the glass, holding Posey up to face Lincoln as he skates over to us.
He presses his hand to the glass and then blows both of them a kiss, his gaze lingering on Nova as he winks. Nonna stands to the side, watching the three of them with the most heartwarming look on her face. When she lost her daughter, Nova and Nash’s mom, it was very hard on her.
Their father had become a shell of a man, but was trying to keep it together for their sake. Nonna made sure she was around as much as she could be, although I know deep down she was struggling with her own grief while trying to mourn her daughter. A parent never thinks of losing their child, regardless of age. One night, many years ago, I found Nonna sitting out back at the Simmonses’ house, smoking a joint while she cried.
It was Nova’s first birthday without her mother. Everyone tried to make the day as special as they could while still honoring her memory. Nova got through the day better than I expected her to. She and Nash both mourned in their own way. Nova spoke of her frequently, claiming talking about her kept her memory alive. Nash internalized everything, never letting anyone see him crumble.
And Nonna—dear Nonna. She held everything together for both of them, along with their father. She carried her own grief, along with everyone else’s. It was the only time I ever saw her cry and to this day, no one else knows about it.
Everyone had disappeared into the house after the party and I went out back looking for my hair scrunchie I had lost while we were playing games in the yard. I stepped around their shed, thinking maybe it was back there, when I found Nonna sitting in the grass, a lit joint burning between her fingers and tears streaming down her face.
That night I sat in the cool grass with her and listened to the stories of Nash and Nova’s mom. I lived through Nonna’s memories with her until we circled back to her grief and she sobbed against my shoulder.
I never did find my hair scrunchie.
Moving closer to the glass, I look out at the ice, my heart stumbling over itself as I see him skating along the blue line. His stick is in his left hand, positioned in front of his body as he pushes a puck along with him. He leaves the puck by one of the dots on the ice and moves his right hand onto his stick as he begins to skate around, warming up the muscles in his legs.
Lincoln moves away from the glass after mouthing something to Nova and he skates over to where Nash is. Nash’s eyes roam over all of us, his eyes instantly finding mine from where he’s standing. He says something to Lincoln, nodding at him before the entire team starts to go through some of their warm-up drills.
Posey bounces again in Nova’s arms and Nonna offers to take her as she walks around me to the two of them. Posey goes to her without any protest and Nonna’s face inches closer to her ear as they watch the players while Nonna talks to her.
“Poe’s been asking to learn how to skate,” Nova says as she inches closer, her voice dropping low enough that Posey can’t hear her. “Lincoln sent me a picture of skates he bought for her earlier.” She looks at me and down to my stomach before her gaze meets mine. “It’s in our nature to want to keep them safe. Sometimes it feels like it was easier when she was still in my stomach.”
“I’m terrified for him to be out here, honestly,” I admit, my voice quiet as I shake my head to myself. “The world is such a scary place and there are literally so many things that can be a danger.”
“Lord, isn’t that the truth?” Nova gives me a knowing look before she looks back out at the ice to her brother and Lincoln skating. “I don’t know how my parents did it with him playing hockey, honestly. It’s almost worse now with them being adults. The hits are harder and the injuries are rarely ever minor.” She glances back at me again. “I don’t know that I’ll willingly sign my kid up for any of this shit.”
“I mean, Poe is still really little. I feel like her learning to skate comes with the territory with Lincoln, plus having her uncle who also plays.”
Nova purses her lips and nods. “This is true.” She tilts her head to the side. “Just wait until they start influencing your little babe. They’ll be wanting to get him or her on the ice as soon as they can hold their head up.”
“Him,” I tell her, a soft smile lifting my lips.
“What?!” She claps her hands over her mouth just as Nash comes skating over to the glass. I turn to look at him, the same time Nova tries to wave him away. “Come back later. You’re interrupting something important.”
Nash’s eyebrows pull together. “What’s going on?” His voice is barely audible but I read his lips.
“I just told her the baby is a he.”
Nova’s head whips back and forth, looking between Nash and I. “Wait, you told him?”
“It accidentally came out the other day,” I tell her with a simple shrug, attempting to brush away the fact that he knows a secret that no one else knows about.
It definitely isn’t the first one.
“Holy shit, this is more serious than I thought,” Nova mumbles under her breath as she turns to Nonna and Posey.
I keep my gaze on Nash’s through the glass as he scans my face, making sure I’m okay as he usually does. “Don’t do anything stupid or get hurt again.”
“I wasn’t that bad of a patient,” he argues, a smirk finding his lips.
“You most definitely were, so you’d better behave out there tonight.”
Nash tilts his head to the side. “Are you going to be the one delivering my punishment if I don’t?”
Oh my god.
Warmth swirls in the pit of my stomach and my mouth is instantly dry at the thought of it. My pregnancy hormones have my libido through the roof and the last thing I need is this man turning me on in the middle of the ice rink.
Suddenly it doesn’t feel as cold as it did when we first got here.
Carson Ford calls Nash’s name, waving him over to where the guys are by the bench. Nash looks at him then back to me as the flames in his eyes burn brighter. My tongue darts out to wet my lips and he winks at me before skating away.
Nova moves back to me, now with Posey in her arms again. “Let’s head up to the suite.” Her gaze travels out to the ice as the guys are heading into the tunnel before she looks back at me. “I’m not going to lie, I’m a little annoyed that my brother knew you are having a boy before I did, but I can get over that.”
“Oh, honey, a boy?” Nonna wraps her arm around my back, pulling me close to her side. “You are just going to have the best time with a little boy. No one loves their mother quite like a little boy does.”
“That’s not true. Little girls love just as hard,” Nova chimes in.
Nonna nods. “They do, but it’s a different kind of love.” Nonna smiles at Nova. “Just wait until your next one. I just know you’ll get your mini Lincoln who will show you exactly what I mean.”
Nova smiles at her, warmth radiating from her expression. “I honestly hope so.” She glances at me as the three of us start to walk together. “Do you have any names picked out yet?”
I shake my head, pursing my lips as we duck out of the way of a cleaning cart rounding the corner. Nonna ushers me away from it and I fall back in step with Nova again. “I have a few I’ve been thinking about it but I don’t know yet.”
“Does this mean we can make the baby shower boy-themed?”
“Might as well,” I tell her with a shrug. Everything I put on my registry was neutral just in case and I left it afterward. The way I found out made it feel a little weird to just randomly announce it to everyone. “I’d rather explain it to everyone then instead of having to explain what happened over and over to multiple people.”
I don’t tell her that I planned on waiting until he was born to tell anyone.
“Sounds like a plan.” She smiles at me, winking as we step into the elevator and make our way to the suite level. Posey wiggles to be let down and she takes Nonna’s hand as we file out into the hall. Nova grabs my arm, pulling me closer for a moment. “I just want you to know, if there’s anything going on between you and Nash, I fully support it.”
My breath catches in my throat. “There isn’t.” The two words escape me in a rush and nervousness lingers in my tone.
“Oh, I know,” she says with a knowing look in her eyes and a ghost of a smirk playing on her lips. “I’m just saying that if there ever were to be, Nash is the kind of guy who would never break your heart.”
I choke out a laugh, shaking my head at her as we start to walk, following behind Nonna and Posey. “You do know he’s broken a lot of hearts, right?”
“Well, duh, silly.” She laughs softly as we reach the suite, holding the door open for me. “That’s because none of them were you.”