11. 11
11
L ess than an hour after climbing the stairs to Bonnie’s third floor apartment, the two of them were once more descending the same steps. He carried two heavy bags, one over each shoulder while Bonnie carried a third, not as small or heavy. She’d argued about him carrying so much, but he’d refused to give in, or even listen. The only reason he didn’t fight her carrying that much was because it would mean one trip instead of two and he didn’t want to have to leave her alone, not even inside her apartment, while he made a second trip.
They loaded her things into his pickup, then climbed in and headed back to the ranch. Lurch and the others at the ranch knew what was going on and that they were on their way. He’d texted the foreman while he’d waited for her to pack and filled him in.
“My place is pretty bare right now, I haven’t really moved in yet.” He glanced across the cab at her before turning back to the road.
“Oh, well you did say you haven’t been in the area long. I guess that’s part of it.” She seemed a bit distracted, not that he could blame her. There was a lot going on in her life right now and he was sure, a lot on her mind.
“No, I mean really bare. I just got the place last night and all I’ve had a chance to move in is a couple of duffels of clothes.” He glanced at her again, hoping she wasn’t having second thoughts or worrying that he was expecting her to get him moved in. “You don’t have to stay with me though. There are other places. Places you will probably be more comfortable.”
“Because you think I can’t live a little rough?” Her tone said she didn’t like him thinking that.
“No, because there will be women around, and because there’s no need for you to live rough for however long it takes me to get things working the way I’d like.”
“Let me take a look, maybe meet some of these other people you want me to stay with, then I’ll decide, okay?” She sounded a little less hurt, but also a little uncertain.
“That works. I don’t want you to feel like I talked you into coming out to the ranch so you’re safe, then dumped you on someone else. I just want to make sure you feel safe and comfortable. I don’t want to be another fuckwad like the guy who tore up your car.” He glanced over at her and found a small smile curving her lips. “What’s so amusing?” He hoped she’d share. He could use a little humor to lighten his mood.
“You.” Her smile grew.
“Me? How so?”
“The things you call Phillip. Anything but my ex or by his name.”
“What do you mean?” He scowled, not remembering calling him anything, or not anything meaningful.
“Asshole, shit stain, fuckwad. Those are all things you’ve called him this morning alone. I think it’s funny you won’t call him by his name.”
He made a face. “I wasn’t doing it on purpose, at least not the calling names part. The refusing to use his name part is. With what he’s pulling, he doesn’t deserve the respect, but I didn’t think of it as name calling, just a way to reference him by calling out his behavior. I guess it’s not just my place that’s a little rough. I’m a bit abrasive myself.”
“I didn’t say I minded.” She reached over and put a hand on his arm for a moment before pulling it back again as if she’d had second thoughts about how he might take such a simple touch. “That reminds me. You told the police officer that people call you Malice? Really? Malice? Where did you get a name like that?”
“In the Army.” He lifted one shoulder in a half-shrug. “It was my call sign and it stuck.”
“And you don’t mind being called something like that?”
He lifted both shoulders and let them fall. “Not really. It never occurred to me to care. When I got it, it fit. I had a partner I worked with nearly all the time; his call sign is Ghost. We were a pair in the field. Where one of us was, the other was always nearby. Some smart ass made a quip about us being the Ghost and the Malice and it stuck. Considering what we did, it seemed appropriate. There was no point in trying to fight it. Besides, in the Army the more you fight something the more likely it is someone will continue just to get a rise out of you. I didn’t bother either way and it stuck.” He shrugged again. “Now it’s just my name.”
She watched him in silence for a couple miles, as if she wasn’t sure what to say to all that, when she spoke, it wasn’t what he’d expected.
“Do you prefer Malice? Is that what you want me to call you?”
He hazarded a look over at her, trying to judge what she was thinking from her expression, but couldn’t get a long enough look at her face to make an even semi-reliable judgement.
“Actually, I like you calling me Corey. No one’s called met that for years. I gave it to you because I didn’t think telling you my name was Malice after you saw me threaten your ex was a good way to make you trust me.”
“Not even your parents?” She tilted her head as she watched him.
He gave her a sad smile. “Yeah, my folks called me Corey or one of a couple pet names from when I was a child, but they’ve been gone a long time.” And that they were gone was part of why he’d sworn never to go back to ranch work. Yet here he was. He needed to find a way to get the subject back onto her. “You said you’ve got five siblings. Wow. Where do you fall in there?”
“Fall? That’s a strange way of putting it.”
Her soft laugh made him glad he could hear it. It made something flutter low in his belly and heat spread through him.
“I’m number five. Not the baby, but almost. I have one younger sister, the rest are all older than me.”
“Tell me more about them? Were your brothers your bullies or your protectors?”
“A little of both, actually.” She laughed again. “I swear they took turns picking on me and defending me. But if anyone but family picked on me, or any of us really, they stood shoulder to shoulder to defend us.”
“You sound like you miss them.”
“I do.”
“Then how come you stayed in Gillette instead of going home after you finished school?”
“Because other than my family being there, there is nothing at home for me. No opportunity, no prospects, no chance to show the world my art. And I did go back, at least for a little while. I don’t fit there anymore.”
“What do you mean?” He frowned as he glanced at her then looked back at the road.
“It’s like the spot where I was shrank while I was gone.” She turned and looked out the window, as if gathering her thoughts. “I know that’s not true, but it feels like it.”
“Maybe it’s that once you weren’t there, in that space you grew? You bloomed and became who you were meant to be and now it feels like that space shrunk?”
She turned back to him, a sad smile on her face. “I like that description. A lot better than the way I’d been thinking of it. I may have to steal that.”
“Feel free.” He shot her a grin, glad she seemed to have lost the melancholy that had come over her as she’d packed. So far, she seemed to be handling things well. He didn’t expect it to continue but he’d take it as long as it lasted.
They spent the rest of the ride to the ranch in companionable silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Malice couldn’t help but wonder what she was thinking about and how she would adjust to life at the ranch.