Chapter 27
Fisher stood beneath the showerhead, his hands pressed flat on the tile wall in front of him. He welcomed the steam that enveloped him like a warm embrace and was thankful for the force of the water that pummeled against his shoulders.
His whole body throbbed from the events of the day. Every muscle fiber he had had stayed flexed during the chase to the airport. He’d been slammed face-first onto the tarmac when the CPD had arrived with sirens blaring and guns drawn. And then he’d spent hours confined to the unforgiving hardness of a jail cell.
But it was the ache in the cold stone that was his heart that penetrated the deepest. The ache for Eliza.
If he thought he had yearned for her before, it was nothing compared to what he felt now. Now that he knew that were it not for the venomous, prickly legged thing inside him, then maybe…just maybe all those dreams he’d never dared to dream might actually have a chance of coming true.
“Fuck me,” he whispered as the memory of her leaping into his arms and kissing him replayed itself in his mind.
It hadn’t simply been a kiss of passion. It was as if every ounce of her being had been poured into that fleeting moment of intimacy.
A kiss of the heart.
A kiss of the soul.
A first kiss of its kind for him.
Which was strange to think about. Or maybe it wasn’t.
He’d been careful with women from the start. Careful to keep things casual. To honor and cherish them without letting them get too close lest they be bitten by the monster.
But Eliza had spent four years worming her way past all his barriers. Four years flirting with him and arguing with him and working with him and feeding him. Four years being a colleague and a friend.
Was it any wonder kissing her was different from kissing anyone else?
As the water rained down on him, he continued to let the scene replay itself. Maybe because he was a glutton for punishment. Or maybe because he understood that it was as close as he’d ever come to having that big BKI love she talked about.
Last night, she shoved me out of bed.
Today, she kissed me within an inch of my life.
He might have thought she’d changed her mind and decided his friends-with-benefits offer was a good idea. But he figured that kiss downstairs had simply been a knee-jerk reaction to the danger of the day and her relief at seeing him alive and unharmed.
And I shouldn’t read too much into it.
Satisfied he’d accurately assessed the situation, he turned his attention to carefully pulling off the butterfly bandages and letting the hot water rinse his cut. When he reckoned it was as clean as it was going to get, he reached for the faucet to shut off the water. Then froze at the sound of the shower curtain being drawn back.
Spinning around, he squeegeed the water from his eyes, and what met his gaze had his lungs collapsing.
It was a wonder his knees didn’t follow suit.
Eliza was…naked.
No. Not naked. Nude. Her body was a work of art, all contours and curves. Her skin was pale and perfect. The little triangle of black hair at the top of her sex accentuated the feminine flare of her hips. And her breasts were high and round, the exact size to fit inside his hands.
For a moment, he was too stunned to speak. Definitely too stunned to move.
His fantasies about that kiss meant he’d already been semi-hard. Now his soldier stood at full attention and throbbed so painfully he only refrained from reaching down to rub away the ache by clenching his hands into fists.
“What are ya doin’?” he choked out.
Her dark, slanted eyes sparked with mischief and something deeper, something that had his balls pulling up tight against his body.
“Just thought I’d come check on you. You looked pretty wrecked downstairs. And this…” She winced as she gently brushed a finger across his cheek below his cut. “This needs better tending to than whatever they gave you down at the police station.”
The wound still smarted. But her soft touch distracted him from any discomfort.
“Ya think I can’t manage a couple new butterfly bandages?” It was a wonder he could talk, much less follow the conversation enough to form sentences that made sense.
Eliza is NAKED!
“I know you can. But I wanted to help. Well, that and I want to take you up on your offer.”
Yes! All the lesser devils shot their fists in the air.
Not so fast,the better angels cautioned.
“Which offer?” His voice was so rough it sounded like he’d eaten a handful of a glass.
“Your offer to join you in the shower.” A playful smile tugged at the corners of her delicious mouth. “And your offer to be friends with benefits.”
His heart pounded in his chest and…lower, his body reacting to her proximity and her nakedness—holy shit! Eliza is NAKED!
He was tempted to pounce on her then and there, just shove her back against the tile wall and make all his fantasies come true, but…
He’d never forgive himself if she made a decision in the heat of the moment that would hurt her or haunt her in the future.
“Nothin’ has changed for me, Liza.” His words were a warning. “I can take ya to bed and give us both physical pleasure. But I can’t feel the way ya want me to feel. I can’t be what ya want me to be. It’ll begin and end in the bedroom.”
She stepped closer and he watched, mesmerized as a drop of water bounced off his shoulder to land on the upper curve of her breast. It dripped slowly, slowly down her smooth, pale skin until it caught on her erect nipple. There it stopped, dangling and sparkling like a delicious diamond.
He wanted to lap it up with his tongue. But he didn’t dare move.
“If these past few days have taught me anything”—her hand cupped his jaw at the same time her dark gaze locked with his—“it’s that we’re never assured a tomorrow. So I want to live in the now. Revel in the now. And if I have to spend the rest of my life missing you for the privilege of getting to have you, that’s a risk I’m willing to take.”
He couldn’t have scripted a better response if he’d tried. And yet…
“What about your abandonment issues? I don’t want to set ya back on the progress you’ve made in therapy.”
She hitched one pale, perfect shoulder. A shoulder he wanted to test with his teeth, taste with his tongue. “That’s the beauty of friends with benefits, right? It’s assumed there will come a time when the benefits cease, and we go back to just being friends. So there’d be no abandonment.”
It sounded perfect to him. Too good to be true.
“And you’d be all right with that? Just bein’ my friend after we’ve…” He let the sentence dangle as he gestured between them.
“How could I not be all right with it when I know that’s what I’m agreein’ to beforehand?”
He needed one last bit of reassurance. “You’re positive?”
“I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life.”
Even though the angels and devils warred inside him, fighting between desire and duty, he knew what the outcome would be.
He couldn’t deny her this. Because this…this was what he’d wanted since he first saw her crossing the compound grounds the day she’d arrived at BKI. This was what he’d spent four years dreaming about. This was his moment. The closest he’d ever come to experiencing a big BKI love.
With a silent nod, he unfroze his muscles so he could pull her into his embrace.
Hellfire and damnation!
She was soft. Her skin was like silk and her lips like satin when he ducked his head to take a hungry taste. She was warm too. All that sensuous feminine heat radiated out from her lithe limbs and soft curves as she went up on tiptoe to press her length against him.
He could feel the rasp of her hard nipples through his chest hair. Feel the way her muscles quivered in anticipation. Feel how wanton she was in the way she undulated slightly, rubbing the hard column of his cock against the smooth flesh of her belly.
He let the water and liquid heat of his desire wash away all thoughts of what tomorrow might bring. For now, Eliza Meadows was his. And he was going to pack a lifetime’s worth of love and passion into each second.