Chapter Three
T he club was loud and chaotic, and Jost hated it the second he walked inside, but he’d asked to go, and so he was going to stick it out for as long as he could. He could already feel the stares of both men and women around him, and he tucked a strand of his curly blond hair behind his ear and made his way to the bar. He had to push to get past two men who both eyed him up like he was some piece of candy they wanted to suck on.
Grimacing, he ducked his head and followed Tam, reaching her as she waved to the swamped bartender. He nodded at her, and she grinned at Jost, then shouted in his ear, “We know each other.” Even with her shouting, Jost barely heard her. The pounding bass vibrated through his body, and he squeaked when a hand pinched his ass.
Tam waggled her eyebrows. “You’re new and you look like you. All blond and green eyed with those gorgeous freckles. You’re going to get a lot of attention here.”
“That’s great.” Jost glanced around and swallowed. Hard. No, he wanted to get out and live life and put his abusive ex behind, and this was a step in the right direction. Maybe. When a hand slid over his ass, he looked up into the dark eyes of a human and shook his head. The human grinned, then grabbed his ass again. Jost glared and knocked it away and shook his head again. The guy kept on smiling but disappeared into the crowd, then Tam took his arm and guided him away from the bar.
He took his drink and sniffed it, then sipped his beer. Nice and cold and just what he needed, but he’d only have one. He wanted to have his faculties about him in a place like this. As he had that thought, he caught sight of a man and a woman kissing, his hands sliding under her dress. Feeling his cheeks heat up, Jost looked away. Seeing them together didn’t bother him. He’d kissed plenty of women himself, but he’d settled with…
Not going there. That was in the past, and he’d made the decision to move forward with his life. Taking another sip of his beer, he followed Tam onto the dance floor and watched her laugh as she spun around on the spot, somehow not spilling a drop of her cocktail. Smiling at her obvious happiness, he danced with her, keeping a firm grip on his drink. He knew all about drinks being spiked and the consequences of it.
Sighing, Jost closed his eyes and let the music wash over him, dancing and laughing and drinking his beer, letting his fears slowly disappear. When he’d finished his drink, he pointed to the bar and Tam nodded, holding up her glass. Giving her a thumbs up, he pushed through the crowd, then stopped when he saw a man in the corner, smiling at something another man was saying.
Jost couldn’t look away. The man was beautiful. Tall with broad shoulders and a tapered waist that led to narrow hips, his black hair was long on top but cut short at the sides. His smile lit up his whole face and Jost was captured by him. Stepping closer, he neared the couple, needing something he couldn’t quite put his finger on. A smile, maybe?
When the man laughed, his eyes crinkled at the sides and Jost’s breath caught. He was more than beautiful. He was gorgeous, and Jost’s lion moved beneath his skin. He blinked his eyes rapidly, trying to get it under control, and when he looked back at the man, he was staring at him as he listened to whatever his friend or partner was saying.
Jost looked from his fantasy come to life to the other man, then back again and stepped away before turning and rushing through the crowd. Those eyes. They’d seen right through him. Green like his, but dark where Jost’s were light. He’d seen them even with the distance between them. They’d held him captive, made him want to do more than what he was ready for, and he pushed through the crowd, needing distance.
He reached the bar and waited, then placed their order. When his water arrived, he took several large mouthfuls, gulping it down. He needed a minute to center himself, to find his balance. How could that one look knock him off balance like that? One look from a stranger had Jost’s pulse racing, his heart beating hard, his body breaking out in a sweat. He wanted to turn around and go back to him, but he couldn’t. He wasn’t ready for him. He wasn’t—
“Get out of the way. I want to order.”
Jost jerked and grabbed his and Tam’s drinks and moved away from the bar to find an isolated corner. Well, not actually isolated, but less crowded than everywhere else. He glanced back to where he’d seen the man, then away, closing his eyes and breathing deeply. He should leave. He wasn’t ready for this. It wasn’t even the hands that reached out to him. It was his reaction that scared him.
Opening his eyes, he moved back onto the dance floor and searched for Tam. When he found her, she was sucking some guy’s face, so he pressed her drink into her hand and quickly left. He moved back off the floor and found an empty chair. Sitting, he sipped his water, his eyes bouncing all over the place until they found him.
He was now on the dance floor, moving freely with graceful moves that held Jost’s attention. He was still with the man Jost had seen him with before, and he smiled at him, leaning closer to hear whatever it was the other man was saying. He laughed, throwing his head back and as he did, he turned toward Jost, his eyes making contact and staying.
Jost held his breath, his body still as the man took his fill. The other man noticed and glanced over, seeing Jost. He frowned and nudged the one who held Jost’s attention, who glared at him in response. Jost looked away, not wanting to see what would happen, but his curiosity got the better of him and he looked back, seeing the black-haired man walk toward him.
Standing quickly, Jost tried to step back, but there was nowhere to go. Trapped in a corner with this man who made his heart thump in his chest coming closer, and he could feel his breathing speed up, fire rushing through his veins. He tried to take deep breaths, but he couldn’t make his lungs work how he wanted them to. His stomach tossed and turned and then this man was in front of him, smiling down at him, then the smile slowly disappeared.
“Sit. Head between your knees.” Jost was suddenly on the chair, his head being pushed down, and he scrambled away or tried to. “You’re having a panic attack. You need to stop and breathe.” Jost heard the words, felt his voice reach deep inside, calm a part of him he never knew existed, and he stopped moving, breathing as this man had told him to.
Slow and deep. In and out, and in time, he began to feel more in control. He lifted his head, turning away, trying to stand, but a hand on his shoulder held him in place. “Look at me.” Unable to ignore the command, Jost looked at the man, seeing his dark green eyes stare into his own. Those eyes searched his face, then he nodded. “How do you feel?”
“Silly,” he murmured.
“You shouldn’t feel that way. A panic attack can come on anywhere.”
“How did you know?” Even Jost hadn’t been aware he was having one and he’d had a few because of his last relationship. “I didn’t know.”
“I have a friend who suffers from them.” He reached a hand out, but the sudden movement had Jost crying out and lifting his hands to protect his face and head. Everything seems to pause in that second and he felt a hand take his wrist and slowly lower it. “Who was he? The man who made you react this way.”
Jost shook his hand off and stood. The other man also stood and leaned closer, then his eyes widened. Jost saw his nostrils flare, and then he closed his eyes and moved back. “What is it?” he whispered, not sure if the man could hear him over the music.
The man held his wrist up. “Take my scent.” Jost carefully took the man’s wrist and ran his nose along it, taking in his scent. He immediately dropped it and shook his head. No, it couldn’t be. “I’m Apollo. What’s your name?”
“Jost.” Why now? Why here?
“Want to go somewhere else so we can talk?”
“No.” He wanted to be anywhere but here with this man. This shifter. His mate. God, he wasn’t ready for this. He felt naked in front of this shifter. He’d seen how he’d reacted. Knew there was more, and he wanted to find out what, but Jost wasn’t ready or willing to talk. “I have to go.” He pushed past Apollo and practically ran outside. He had to get away. He couldn’t do this, couldn’t handle the ramifications of finding his mate. He needed time to recover from his—
“Jost! Wait!”
“Please leave me alone.” Jost spun around, holding his hands up, then looking up at Apollo who was several inches taller than his own five feet six inches. Made him feel small. Helpless.
Apollo held his hands up, palms showing. “I’m not going to hurt you. I just want to talk. That’s all. Somewhere we can hear each other. Somewhere with people, so you’re in public.”
Jost took in a shaky breath. In public. Fuck, Apollo knew. How could he not know after the way Jost had reacted in the club? He wrapped his arms around his waist. “I can’t,” he whispered.
“I promise I won’t do anything. I only want to talk to you.”
“Because we’re mates.” There. He’d said it. This was his mate, and he wasn’t ready for him, and he needed time and distance and—
“Yes. Because you’re my mate and I want to get to know you. I can tell you’re hesitant,” Jost snorted, but Apollo carried on. “And that’s why I suggested somewhere public.”
“Public.” Jost closed his eyes and curled over, then jumped back when Apollo touched his arm. “Don’t.”
“I’m sorry.” Jost opened his eyes and looked at Apollo. “I only meant to offer comfort. I won’t reach out to touch you unless invited.”
“I need to go.”
“Please.” Apollo reached out to him but let his hand fall away. “I only want to talk to you. We’re mates. That means something to me. I can see you’ve been hurt, and I don’t want to add to that, but I’d still like to get to know you. There’s an all night cafe near here. We can go there and talk. That’s all I want, Jost.”
Hearing his name coming from Apollo’s lips made him gasp, and he bit his lip, watching Apollo from the corner of his eye. They were mates. It wasn’t fair to Apollo to walk away and not give him a chance, but after everything… No, he couldn’t let the echos of the past effect what happened now. He needed to let go and move on. Wasn’t that why he’d come out? To find himself again and move on? “Okay.”
Apollo smiled and Jost couldn’t look away. Apollo’s smile widened into a grin and Jost ducked his head when he felt his cheeks heat up. “It’s not far from here. Shall we go?”
Nodding, Jost walked with Apollo, making sure there was plenty of distance between them. Apollo noticed but said nothing, just giving him a soft smile. “You’re from the local pride.”
“I am. How do you know?”
“I can scent you’re a lion. Omega, too.”
Jost slowed until he stopped. “I’m not weak.”
“I never said you were. Omegas hold a pack or pride together. They are the glue that holds all the pieces in place. They bring peace and tranquillity. I feel calm around you.”
Nodding, Jost began to walk again. “I help look after our young.”
“I’m a teacher and a zebra.”
Jost stopped again, his eyes growing wide. “Really?”
Apollo nodded. “And I’m the leader of my dazzle.” Pointing ahead, he said, “There it is. Let’s grab a drink, then we can talk.”