CHAPTER 11
Samia
Samia: Did you know I was living in sin with Kian?
Raene: Erm…excuse me, what?
Samia: Apparently, I moved into his place, BML (Before memory loss), and I’m there now. Everything I own is here.
Samia: Clothes are in the closet, even my panties are in the dresser, and all my products are on my side of the double sink in the bathroom.
Raene: Holy shit, my secretive best friend. This is the first I’ve heard it!
Raene: This is so unlike you, LOL.
Samia: Tell me about it. I feel like I’ve been dropped into this new life, and only Kian knows what happened in last week’s episode.
Samia: And get this…I didn’t even tell my parents I was living with him.
Raene: That seems right. Your dad would hit the roof. Remember your prom date and how your dad pinned him by the throat because he mentioned something about your ass?
That memory is stored in the back of my mind and comes back with a chuckle.
I’m no longer a na?ve seventeen-year-old girl, but only BML me knows why I was so secretive about living with Kian.
Samia: My parents love him, so I don’t have the faintest idea why I’m a secretive bitch. I didn’t even tell you!
Raene: I’m reconsidering that friendship bracelet I gave you in ninth grade.
Raene: I always thought you had a crush on Kian (don’t stress your little amnesia brain, darling, you never told me outright). It was how you’d change when he was around, like you were tasered with electricity and so hyperaware of him.
Raene: I wonder now if you were always banging him.
Samia: LOL. I don’t know that, but I know I’m not currently banging him.
Samia: Kian is back with food, GTG, babe. TTYL. Kisses for my favorite boy.
Samia: I mean the baby, NOT Tommy. ;-)
Raene: HAHA. Keep me updated. This is better than any streaming series. XOXO
Setting the phone aside on the low-slung coffee table in the wide-open plan apartment overlooking the East River Skyline, I hear Kian’s key in the door as he strides along the hallway and into where I’m currently lounging on the U-shaped cream couch. It’s so comfortable I very nearly relaxed into a nap.
I’d be snoring now if I hadn’t been snooping and texting with Raene. The instant he offered to collect food, I eagerly leaped off the couch and tip-toed into each room. I meticulously explored every nook and cranny of my home, trying to recognize any part of it, hoping it would shake a memory loose.
As I told Raene, all my important stuff is here, neatly stored in places I would keep things if I lived here. I live here, I amend, hoping my brain will catch up soon. I’m becoming increasingly annoyed with the persistent memory lapses.
Even the most private items, including my sex toys, are stored in the nightstand drawer in our bedroom. My cheeks were on fire when I slammed the drawer closed. If there was any question about me living here, that settled it.
But the apartment is eerily void of any personal touches of us.
No photos together.
As Kian drops a white paper bag on the kitchen island, I glance over the back of the couch and ask, “Kian, did we ever go on vacation together?”
“Not yet,” he answers. “We’ve been busy. Where do you want to go? I’ll book it today.”
He’s serious.
If I said the other side of the world, I’d be in Australia in days.
Knowing that Kian would give me anything I asked for loosens my tight shoulders, and I smile at him.
“I’ll give it some thought. Now, are you feeding me? I’m so hungry.”
Kian doesn’t allow me to get my teeth around the incredible-smelling sandwiches he places on the coffee table because he leans down over me and crushes a kiss on my lips.
The shock of his taste sends my head reeling into orbit, into a pleasure spiral I soon clasp onto as I grip his hair and angle him down so he falls on top of me with a grunt. But he never detaches our lips as he devours me with hungry gusto.
Before long, Kian is pressing me into the soft couch cushions as he feasts, and I take his masculine flavor into my lungs to savor.
Knowing he is mine now takes on a different meaning as our lips tangle in a passionate kiss.
It’s a surge of possessiveness within me, something visceral and unhinged. While my memories may be jumbled, I can tell this is an entirely unfamiliar sensation I haven’t experienced before.
And that makes me wild as I tug on his hair and moan into his mouth. It’s as Kian roams a hand up underneath my shirt, his fingertips barely grazing my bra-covered breast, when there’s a loud shrill of the phone in his back pocket.
Kian only grunts and deepens our ferocious kiss until I see stars.
The phone stops, and there’s only our panting to be heard. Until the annoying ringing starts again. Kian wrenches inches away, looking like he’s been fucked within an inch of his life. His eyes are wild and dark, his hair is a complete mess from my tugging fingers, and there’s no hiding his extended arousal inches away from the apex of my thighs.
“God fucking damn. I will kill him.” He curses, reaching back to fish out his phone; he answers with a snarled, “This better be life or death, Carter.” All the while, his eyes are locked in battle with mine. I can’t look away from him and don’t want to.
The draw toward Kian is bizarrely massive.
This force connects him and me, and it can’t be broken.
With him kneeling over my prone body, I lift slightly and boldly slide my hands beneath his t-shirt, grazing my nails up and down his stomach.
His eyes flare, and he bares his teeth as I continue scratching and stroking.
Chemistry, like nothing else, attacks me from every corner, making every breath all about Kian as I linger on his taste on my kiss-swollen lips.
As I listen to his one-sided, heated conversation, he clasps a hand around the front of my neck, like he needs to anchor me to him in the worst, most feral way. And the notion puts a light inside me.
I want to be adored by this man.
To experience how dark and lewd his lovemaking is.
Some inkling tells me there’s nothing vanilla and ordinary about how Kian will work my body. It’s in his stare and touch. His touch has always been dominant. Overpowering at times that I have to catch my breath because of his proximity.
I’m so caught up in touching him I don’t catch all of his conversation, but he’s pissed at Carter.
“Yes, right? I’ll be there. I said I’ll be fucking there.” And he hangs up and then sighs, dropping his mouth to my forehead. “I hate to say it, baby, but I need to go out for a while. Some shit has come up, and Carter can’t deal with it without my holding his fucking hand.”
The same sigh goes through me, and all my lust whimpers.
How can he ravage me tirelessly if he leaves?
“Can’t you just kill him like you wanted to? It’s a wonderful idea.” I pout, and Kian chuckles, kissing me again before he climbs from the couch.
“You don’t know how much I wish I could.”
Ugh, stupid Carter, who I don’t even know, damn his eyeballs for Kian-blocking me.
“I’ll call a car to take me and my sandwiches back to the townhouse.” There’s no point in wasting delicious food, not when my belly reminds me of my hunger.
“Stay here, baby.” He demands, rounding on me as I climb to my feet, and then he cups the side of my face, giving me another toe-blistering kiss that’s just the biggest tease of all when he draws away. “I want you here. You don’t know how long I’ve waited to see you at home.”
“Okay,” I breathe against his lips, scratching my nails gently down his lightly stubbled cheek. He shaves daily, but I love it when it grows back within hours. “I’ll make you a deal.”
His groan is all sexual, and he drops his forehead to mine. “You don’t know how much making deals juices me up, dreamgirl. You’re swimming in dangerous waters.”
“I’m an excellent swimmer.”
“Give me this deal.” He palms my ass and keeps his hands there.
“Come back without a murder charge, and I’ll save you a sandwich.”
Two eyebrows hike up into his hair, and I bite the inside of my cheek. The dirty boy expected a more scandalous deal, didn’t he? But I’m serious about food. I’m so hungry I might still eat it all.
“I’ll accept the sandwich deal and this mouth,” he rasps, his eyes falling to watch as he drags the pad of his thumb against my lips. The action reminds me of something profoundly sexual, like he’s done that before, maybe after I’ve gone down on him.
My whole belly fills with air, and I have to let it out slowly or fear I might explode from excessive lusting.
I sure have a fertile imagination.
“Deal.” I croak, feeling unsteady in my body. And I rise to those few inches separating our heights and press a soft kiss to Kian’s mouth.
“You’re so fucking sweet.” He says right into my lips, leaving me with a bite. I only let out a shaken breath when Kian grabbed his keys and car fob and took off.
Was I going to have sex with him on that couch only moments ago?
Yep. I sure the hell was.
No regrets or doubts attack my overthinking mind.
I want him.
It’s as uncomplicated and sure as I can feel right now.
It’s a simple decision. Not even a decision.
We’ve been heading this way for a while. Had I been up to it when I came home from the extended hospital stay, I’m positive Kian might have rolled around in bed with me that day if I’d shown the tiniest inkling I was up for it. His staunch intensity has been that bright and open. It leaves me with no uncertainties.
And while I sink my teeth into a brie and smoked ham oat bread sandwich, my favorite, I gaze out the window as my toes curl into the thick rug beneath my feet, and I hope Kian comes home soon.
I have pouncing to do.
And months’ worth of sex to make up.