Chapter Twenty
Twenty
Alistair
Do small things with great love.
An hour later, we were bundled up in my truck riding down the windy mountain roads toward town. They were clear right now, but tomorrow the snow would be piled so high, I wouldn’t feel comfortable taking Pam out.
“Do you ever get tired of living this far out from civilization?” Pam asked.
“It can be inconvenient at times, especially when the weather is bad, but I like the privacy I have living out here. Other than my neighbors snowmobiling, it’s pretty peaceful. I’m sure it’s the same as Briar Glenn.”
“Yeah, but I don’t have to drive quite as far. The town has everything I need close by. But I guess if I have to drive out to Rock Harbor, it’s not quite as convenient.”
Rock Harbor was about forty minutes away from Briar Glenn and was the closest big city.
Chai’s gastroenterologist’s office was there, as well as the best hospital in the area.
There was a beautiful waterfront with plenty of bars, restaurants, and entertainment.
In fact, I was slightly disappointed when Chai took the job at Leviathan Fitness over one of the busier gyms in Rock Harbor, but now I was thankful she did.
Atlas was an amazing boss, and the gym was a great environment. And if she hadn’t moved to Briar Glenn, I wouldn’t have met Pam.
It was amazing how one decision, one impulsive choice, had such a ripple effect.
Once the road leveled out, I reached over and grabbed Pam’s hand and brought it to my mouth for a kiss. I’d missed her more than I thought was possible, and it meant the world to me that she’d conquered her fear of flying just to be with me when I needed her most.
We drove through town, and I pointed out a few of my favorite shops and restaurants before turning in to the grocery store parking lot. I parked in the back of the lot and helped Pam out of the truck.
“This is quite the grocery store,” she said, staring at the brick behemoth that dominated the strip mall.
“Wait until you see the inside.”
We started walking toward the entrance when I stopped in my tracks. “Shit. My bags.”
I kept my reusable shopping bags in the truck so I didn’t forget them. So far, that hadn’t worked out too well for me.
Pam watched me jog back to the truck, my hooves clicking against the asphalt.
She giggled as I made my way back to her with the bags tucked under my arm.
“What?” I asked, loving the way she smiled at me.
“Nothing. You’re just cute with your little reusable bags.”
I shrugged. “Just doing my part to save our planet.”
I took her hand again, and we made our way through the sliding glass doors of the grocery store.
As soon as we stepped inside, we were hit with the scent of freshly prepared foods coming from the hot bar.
Aisles ran down the length of the store as far as the eye could see, interrupted by specialty counters for the deli, fresh seafood, and gourmet cheeses.
There was even a coffee shop by the exit doors so you could grab a hot cup of coffee on your way out.
It was still early in the day, but the place was jam-packed with shoppers. That’s what I got for coming out the day before a snowstorm.
“Goodness,” Pam said, taking it all in. “And I thought the Whole Foods in Rock Harbor was nice.”
“This is one of the upsides of living near a ski resort town.”
“I can see that.”
“All right.” I pulled my scribbled grocery list out of my pocket and tipped it back so I could read it clearly.
“Alistair,” Pam said. “Let me see that.”
“Fine. Fine.” I begrudgingly passed her the list.
“Wow, this is…a lot.” She squinted. “And are these my favorite foods?”
“Maybe,” I said, trying to act nonchalant. Like I hadn’t taken notes on her likes and dislikes during our virtual dinner dates.
“You are so perfect, you know that?” The way she said it, the light in her eyes when she stared up at me with that bright smile on her face, made my chest feel tight.
Perfect? She was the one who was perfect.
“Not even close, but I’m glad you think so.” I pulled a cart from the corral and shoved the reusable bags in the child seat. “Now, you read the list, and I’ll navigate.”
“Sounds like a plan.”
Pam read off the items and I led her down the aisles, tossing things into the cart.
“This is really nice,” I said. There was such a sense of normalcy in this. We could browse the aisles, chatting as we went. Even something as mundane as a trip to the grocery store felt exciting. Enjoyable. Usually, I’d do something like this on my own, but this was so much better.
“It is, isn’t it? The last time I went grocery shopping with someone was when the kids were teenagers.” Pam’s expression softened and she let out a dry laugh. “I guess that’s one of those parenting things where you don’t realize it’s the last time until the moment has already passed.”
That realization hit me hard. In parenthood, there were so many of those moments.
I nodded. “Like the last time you hold them.”
“The last time they fall asleep on you,” she said wistfully.
“I remember when Chai had her surgery, and as she was coming out of anesthesia in the recovery area, she looked so pitiful. It was the first time in years that I didn’t see her as the strong woman she is but as the little girl I raised.
I was stroking her hair and she called out for me.
It broke my heart into a million pieces.
It reminded me that even though she’s an adult, she still needs me. ”
“Alistair,” Pam gritted out. She took off her glasses and fanned her eyes. “Please don’t make me cry in the middle of the bread aisle.”
I wrapped my arm around her and kissed the top of her head. “Sorry about that, but it’s rare that I get the opportunity to talk to someone who understands.”
“Oh, I understand. I feel like one day I blinked and now my kids are mated and getting married.”
“That just means you’re moving on to another amazing period in their lives.”
She nodded. “A new version of them.”
“And a new version of you, too.” She’d only been doing yoga and working on herself for a short period of time, but I’d already noticed a change. “How are we doing on the list?”
“I think that’s everything.”
“You sure about that?” I asked.
She held the list, double-checking it as she rifled through the cart. “Yep. That’s everything.”
“If I’m not mistaken, I believe I was promised baked goods.”
She did a little mock gasp and, gods, it was adorable. “I believe you were. So what am I making?”
“Hmm.” I thought about it for a few seconds. There was an old classic that I craved every time I got the munchies…“How about chocolate chip cookies?”
“I’m a professional baker and your request is chocolate chip cookies?” She scoffed. “I mean, I have a great recipe but—”
“Ah!” I pointed a finger at her. “See. You have a great recipe. That means I need to try them.”
She grabbed my finger, slowly lowering it while she locked eyes with me. “All right, big guy. Chocolate chip cookies it is.”
We made our way to the baking section and Pam rattled off ingredients.
Some I had at home, and the ones I didn’t we added to the cart.
Including a very expensive bag of chocolate chips.
Not once did I gawk at the price, but Pam felt the need to reassure me several times that they were worth it. It was adorable.
Once we’d gathered all the cookie ingredients, we pulled into one of the checkout lanes and started piling our items on the conveyor belt.
“Do you need bags?” the cashier asked.
“Nope,” I said triumphantly, pulling them out of the cart and handing them to the cashier.
Pam laughed and shook her head. “The sea turtles thank you for your service.”
The cashier rang us up, and somehow we managed to squeeze everything into the three reusable bags we brought. I reached for my wallet to pay, but Pam grabbed my arm.
“Will you let me treat?” she asked. She stared up at me through her lashes, those green eyes wide and pleading.
I puffed out a breath. “If you keep looking at me like that, you can do whatever you want. Have whatever you want.”
She patted my arm and snuggled against me. “Thank you. It’s the least I can do.”
“I appreciate it.” Honestly, I did. As much as I wanted to treat her to everything she deserved, I liked that she was firm in what she stood for. It was never expected that I’d pay for everything. Not once did I feel like she was with me for my money.
There was so much I wanted to ask her. How did a woman like her end up with a man like Don? Never in a million years could I imagine Pam—my Pam—being subjected to an asshole like that.
I didn’t let myself dwell on it for too long, though. That was her past, and here in the present, she was with me, paying for a cartful of groceries.
I typed my rewards number into the keypad, and when the membership discounts came off, Pam tapped her card against the reader. The cashier handed her the receipt, and we headed for the exit.
—
As soon as we got home, we started baking. “All right,” I said, staring at the ingredients and baking utensils lined up on the counter. “What are we doing here?”
Pam leaned against the countertop next to me, drumming her fingers along the edge.
She was wearing this tight black turtleneck today, and the way she was standing with her chest pushed out made her body look divine.
The woman was so effortlessly beautiful—the kind of beauty that demanded attention—and she had absolutely no idea.
She made me want to lift her up onto the countertop and—
“Well,” she said, her voice shaking me out of my fantasy, “the first thing we’re going to do is preheat the oven.”
I cleared my throat and nodded. “Oh yeah. That’s a good place to start.” I made my way over to the wall oven and tapped the display. “Temperature?”
When she didn’t answer, I looked over to find her staring at her phone.
“What are you doing?” I asked, amused.
With her eyes still fixed on her phone, she said, “Looking up instructions for high-altitude baking. I don’t want to mess anything up.”
Okay, so she wasn’t just ignoring me to scroll social media.