Chapter 32
Thirty-Two
DARIA
By the time I drive back to my apartment building, I’m already hungry for lunch. Vic had some clients coming in, and while I was sad to leave, I’m not about to stand in the way of his business. It helped that he kissed me so deeply before I left I almost forgot my name.
The noise from my engine is god awful by the time I find a parking spot, and more than a few people side-eye my beater from the sidewalk. I should really take it into the shop, but I can’t afford that.
Cutting the engine, I grab my purse and phone. The screen lights up with a message from Kai.
Kai
Do you want to come to our house for dinner on Sunday?
That sounds like fun and also like another line I shouldn’t cross. At least, this time, I have an obligation I can’t break.
I have a family dinner tomorrow :(
Another time, then?
Chewing on my cheek, I open and close my door without looking, leaning back against it and wrinkling my nose at the smell that’s definitely coming from my car. I don’t want to lie and tell him yes, but I also don’t want to freak them out before Monday. Vic knows where I live, and I wouldn’t put it past him to tell the others.
I need the weekend to mentally prepare myself.
We can talk about it on Monday!
“Uh, miss? Is your car on fire?”
Turning toward the concerned voice, I catch sight of the black smoke pouring out from under my hood. “Oh shit!”
“Oh my God! Someone call the fire department,” someone shouts from the sidewalk.
I step away from the car, but a horn blares, and I screech, lunging toward Betty in enough time to avoid becoming roadkill. As soon as that car passes, I scurry onto the sidewalk and back away, in case there’s an explosion.
Flames start to lick out from under the hood, and I cover my mouth. This can’t be happening. It’s a dream, right? People scream as the flames get bigger, and someone grabs me hard enough to shatter my hopes. This isn’t a dream. I stumble over my feet as I’m dragged farther away from the trash fire that is my life.
“Yes, hi! There’s a car on fire.” Someone rattles off the address, and people panic that it’ll explode.
“Ma’am. Is that yours?”
My legs are weak, and I slowly sink until my knees hit the concrete, fingers tugging at the roots of my hair. How will I get to work? How will I see Marco? How will I ever be able to afford a new car? I literally have no savings, and if I lose my job, then I definitely won’t have any money. Maybe it’s not as bad as it seems? Surely, it’s just a little fire and everything will be okay?
I take in Betty again. The flames are angry and big, and there’s no way the car will be okay. It’s fucked and so am I.
“Hey.” Someone’s hand waves in front of my face.
I glance up at them, tears blurring my vision. “People take the bus all the time.”
“Is that your car?”
“It’ll be okay,” I say, ignoring the question. “I’ll wake up earlier. I can go see Marco and leave before the last one stops running.”
“I think she’s in shock?”
“Should we call an ambulance?”
“They usually come with the fire department.”
The voices and conversations float around me, but they don’t really reach me. It’s like I’m a spectator, watching as my world slowly unravels bit by bit. No money. No car. No scent matches.
That’s what my future looks like.
Hopeless.
No. Not hopeless, just . . . empty.
And maybe that’s worse?
“Does anyone know who she is?”
“What’s going—holy shit! There’s a car on fire,” a familiar, growling voice shouts.
John. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Leave it to my landlord to snap me out of my daze. I guess panic overrides everything else I’m feeling. I scramble to my feet right as he turns toward the group clustered around me.
“Whose car—oh, it’s you ,” he snarls as soon as he spots me.
One concerned citizen glances at him, then me, and steps between us. “Hold on now. What’s the problem?”
“She’s two months behind on rent, that’s the problem!” John screams.
The people around me give me pitying looks. I hate it. I hate the way the person who stepped in to defend me glances back at me like I’ve stolen their cookies. Like struggling to survive makes me a horrible person. Like it makes me contagious.
“I can pay rent next week. That’s when I get paid,” I tell him, voice soft and trembling. Tears track down my cheeks, and I swipe at them, hating that, on top of everything else, I’m crying.
The person who stepped in side-steps and glances at me. “Is this your landlord?”
The universe really hates me. I hang my head. “Yeah.”
“And now your piece of trash is on fire in front of my building?” John asks with a scoff. “This is what you get for dodging me. Bad people don’t get good things.”
“Hey now, come on, no need to make her feel worse,” someone says.
“You want me to be nice to her? She’s been sneaking in and out of the building to avoid me. She knows she’s delinquent.”
The heat from the fire washes over my skin, or maybe that’s embarrassment. I don’t know who any of these people are, but they all know enough about me to step back. “I get paid on Thursday,” I say again, in case he didn’t hear me. “I can pay you on Thursday.”
He shakes his head. “Pay me? HAH! I’ve heard that before. No. I’m done giving you chances. I want you out in thirty days.”
My face scrunches, and I blink, clearing the tears from my eyes. “Wait? What? You can’t do that.”
A cruel smirk cuts across his reddened face. “Oh, yes, I can. Check your lease, darlin ’.”
Sirens blare down the street, and the murmurs behind me blend together. My fingers curl into fists, but I don’t have a way to fight this. At the end of the day, John is right—I broke terms of my lease. And I doubt he’s lying about being able to kick me out. He has to protect himself.
The only problem is . . . I don’t know what to do.
I don’t know where to go or who to ask.
Quinn and her mates would take me in for a while, but I wouldn’t feel comfortable staying for more than a few days. Jane would probably let me crash for a bit too. I hate the idea of asking that of my friends.
No. I’ll have to figure something else out. My dads and Letti might let me come home until I get back on my feet. Mom’s house...no. That’s out of the question. The only thing worse than my life falling apart is my life falling apart while my mom is around to tear me down.
“Thirty days,” John tells me again, stepping back as firefighters rush by and start to put out the fire.
And the sad thing is, losing my home is going to hurt a hell of a lot less than losing the scent matches I just met.
Doing the right thing sucks more than my life falling apart. After spending the weekend throwing a pity party, now that Monday is here, I’m trying my best to keep it together. My stomach is in knots as I climb off the bus, and I’m so distracted, I step directly in front of someone. They crash into me, hard. I squeal, tipping, but strong hands and bergamot envelop me, keeping me safe.
Home .
Still tipped over, like we were dancing and Kai’s paused to dip me, I blink up at him. He’s looking between me and the bus with a frown. His hands are firm against my back, and in the morning sun, the dimension in his brown irises pops.
“Daria,” he says, slowly looking back at me. “Did you take the bus?”
Does he sound mad, or is that my imagination?
“Uh, yeah.” I grip his arms and try to right myself up, but, listen, I’ve never been good at pullups. Thankfully, Kai straightens, bringing me with him. I’m like a feather in his hold, and I love it.
“Why?” he asks, fingers flexing on my back before he reluctantly takes a step back.
“I had some car trouble.” I shrug and glance away. I wasn’t expecting to run into him before we had the talk , and if he keeps looking at me like he wants to eat me, my wanton ass just might let him.
“Hmm.” That’s not a happy hmm. “Can I walk you in?”
And be trapped in an elevator with him? I can’t let that happen. Quick. Think of an excuse. Maybe I could pretend to be sick? No. That’s dumb.
“Oh, no,” I say with a gasp. “My phone is ringing.”
Kai arches an eyebrow. “I don’t hear anything.”
Narrowing my eyes, I grab my phone from my purse and clutch it to my chest, hiding the screen. “It’s on vibrate. You can head in, I need to take this.”
Kai studies me, seeing too much, but he doesn’t push back. “See you inside?” he asks with a questioning smile.
“Sure thing.” My nervous chuckle makes him do a double take, but I spin away and glance at my screen, heart racing and fingers shaking. Lying is literally the worst. I hate it.
Even as his scent slowly fades, I force myself to put the phone to my ear and carry on a fake conversation. A minute passes, and only then do I allow myself to glance over my shoulder. Kai is long gone. My shoulders sagging, I say goodbye to myself—because, manners—then walk the short distance between the stop and Good Vibes.
My stomach is so jumbled, I’m pretty sure I’m going to hurl. I arrived earlier than normal, since I had to take a certain bus to make it on time, but there are still plenty of people milling about.
A few clamber onto the elevator with me, coffees in hand. I press against the back of the elevator, catching the faintest trace of the guys’ scents. At least I didn’t run into all three of them outside. I might’ve spilled the truth as soon as I saw them, and that would’ve been messy.
Once the elevator reaches the right floor, I scurry off, stopping at the break room first for a cup of coffee and a bagel. The nice thing about Good Vibes is they always have food and drinks for their employees.
I’ll miss that.
Wait. What will I tell Mandy? This matrixed position was originally scoped for a year, but when the guys cut it short because they no longer want to be around me, what will she think?
My mind is a mess of worries as I head to my cubicle. The lights are on, and my pulse flutters at my throat. They’re here. I mean, of course they are, it’s their business, but I didn’t expect to see them so soon.
I thought I’d have time to prepare.
Throat tight and breathing shaky, I set my bagel and coffee on my desk, frowning at them as my stomach turns. Yeah. Probably best not to eat or drink anything right now.
“Hey, bunny.”
Startling at Lincoln’s sudden appearance, I clutch my chest and spin around. “Jesus Christ, you scared the shit out of me.”
Chuckling, he shoves his hands into his slacks. Today, he’s wearing a blue-and-white-striped button-up and his hair is down. It’s longer than I realized, stopping a few inches below his shoulders. A gorgeous shade of brown—rich and sleek and yeah. I have hair envy. “See something you like?”
So many things. There are so many things to like about him and Kai and Vic. They’re perfect in surprising ways. Everything I never realized I wanted and needed.
I force myself to look away. “I was just logging in.”
He doesn’t respond for a minute, and when I turn back around, he’s studying me like a puzzle he’s trying to figure out. “Are you okay?”
“Uh, yeah,” I say with a strained laugh. “It was a long weekend.”
Forehead wrinkling, he scrutinizes me some more. He’s so good at reading people, he probably knows I’m lying.
“Can I talk to you today? Like the whole pack? It’s not work related.”
“Sure, we can talk right now.”
Fuck. No. I need a moment. “Uh, can I eat my breakfast first?” I gesture to the bagel I have no plans on eating, but it gives me an excuse to prepare myself for the conversation. Running into Kai this morning threw me off.
“Sure, maybe we can huddle in my office with Vic and Kai before the meeting with the team?” Lincoln searches my face. “What’s going on? You’re scaring me.”
Am I such an open book?
“I think it might be better to wait for the pack,” I tell him with a smile I hope comes across as reassuring, but based on the way his eyes narrow, that only made him more suspicious. “Please,” I add.
Sighing, he rubs the back of his neck and glances away. “Okay, yeah. Come to my office when you’re ready.”
“Thanks, Lincoln.”
He nods and takes a step away, searching my face one more time before leaving.
A breath rushes out of me, and I sag against the desk, covering my face with my hands. That was horrible. Today is going to be the worst day of my life.
About thirty minutes later, Lincoln knocks on the wall of my cubicle. “I know I said come when you’re ready, but I’m impatient.”
Time to do this. “That’s okay. I’m ready.” I lock my computer and take a steadying breath before turning to face him. He doesn’t step back when I stand, and I clear my throat, glancing away from him when he shoots me a questioning look.
“Daria—”
“Can we wait?” My voice barely comes out a whisper. “Please.”
Linc’s frown deepens hard enough to leave permanent lines, but he concedes and gives me space to step out of the cube and head toward his office, where the pack is waiting. Every step is like trudging through mud. My pulse races and my hands tremble at my sides. Heat crawls up my neck, and by the time Linc shuts us in the office, my entire body is shaking.
Vic and Kai shoot to their feet when they see the state I’m in, but I hold up my hand to keep them from coming over.
“I don’t know,” Lincoln says when they glance at him for guidance.
“Daria?” Kai asks. “Is everything all right?” His arms had felt so good around me this morning.
The air is rich with citrus, cinnamon, and sweet myrrh. It’s almost cruel how soothing the scents should be, but my mind is racing as I struggle to breathe, chest tightening with every passing second. Agony slowly creeps through my veins. A slow, painful death. “Uh, you guys might want to sit down,” I tell them, side-stepping until I’m standing next to the desk and the chairs on the other side of it.
The three of them trade wary looks before sitting, eyes set on me as I tuck my shaking hands behind my back. I open my mouth to begin, but all that comes out is a pathetic sound.
“Little doe?”
God. They’re all so worried. As much as it hurts me to say it, I can’t keep torturing them. “I need to tell you something. I—” I begin, but my voice cracks. Clearing my throat hard, I shake myself and start again. “I want to start by saying I didn’t know when I first met you. I only realized last Monday when he showed up.”
“Monday?” Lincoln tips his head, and I see the dots slowly start to connect, but he’s missing enough information that it doesn’t quite make sense yet. “Ryan?”
I nod. “I...he...” Come on, Daria. Just fucking say it. “I dated his pack last year for a few months,” I say quickly, then the words won’t stop coming. “We met at a party and hit it off. We took a few trips together. Obviously, it didn’t last, but it was about six months, and I thought I loved them, but then they—” I cut off and press my lips together. They don’t need to know that.
“Then they what?” Vic asks, jaw flexing.
Kai is clenching his fists, and Lincoln is staring at me like I kicked his puppy.
“Uh, nothing,” I lie, chest tightening as reality starts to set in. “The point is, we dated for a while. And Ryan is your son, and obviously that means we can’t be together, and I’m getting kicked out of my apartment, and my car caught on fire yesterday. I really can’t lose my job,” I continue in a rush. “I’m hoping we can tell Mandy something that won’t make me seem like a terrible employee, because I really, really need the money.”
My chest is heaving by the time I finish, and I can’t bring myself to look at them. I want to remember how they looked at me before there were complications. I don’t want to ruin the slice of happiness we had together. Nearly panting, I try to keep my breathing under control, but the harder I try, the more it hurts to breathe and the less air I get. As dark dots sprinkle across my vision, I clutch my chest. I think I’m hyperventilating. I swear I sound like a dying horse, like every attempted breath puts me a little closer to death because, no matter how hard I try to get air into my lungs, I can’t.
How was Quinn ever around her scent matches without telling them? This is so painful.
Vic rises from his seat. “Breathe, little doe.”
“I. Can’t,” I manage to gasp out, chest so tight it feels like a giant has my lungs in its fist, crushing them slowly to draw out the pain. Or maybe it’s the choker? Grasping the clasp, I try to take it off, but my fingers fumble.
“Stop,” Vic shouts.
My gaze flies to meet his.
A hard line carves between his eyebrows, and his eyes darken. He takes a step toward me. “Who told you to take that off?”
Surely, he doesn’t want me to keep it. That would be another level of torture.
“I. I—” I’m still struggling to breathe and can’t get the words out.
He reaches for me, and I try to take a step back, but he grabs hold of me and pins me to his chest. “Get over here before she faints.”
I don’t realize who he’s talking to until Kai and Lincoln join the hug, surrounding me on all sides. Bergamot and spice and myrrh. Greedily, I inhale, memorizing every subtle note in their scents. Memorizing how it feels to be protected by them. Memorizing everything, so I can remember this moment after they come to their senses and break it off.
Slowly, my breathing steadies, and it’s only then I realize they’re talking to one another, and probably have been this entire time.
“I’m not letting her go,” Kai says softly.
My stomach flutters.
“Ryan is going to be so angry.” Linc releases a heavy sigh. “But I can’t imagine life without her now that we’ve found her. She was always meant to be ours.”
My heart clenches.
“She’s our mate,” Vic agrees, chest rumbling against my cheek as he speaks.
My eyes mist.
Someone’s thumb runs over my spine. I don’t say anything, for fear of making them change their minds, but they don’t. Although they discuss how Ryan will react, they never even bring up breaking it off, almost like it was never an option.
Which is crazy, right? Maybe this is another one of fate’s cruel jokes. Maybe I actually fainted, and I’m imagining this whole thing.
“Is this real?” My voice trembles.
“Oh, bunny,” Linc says, mouth close to my ear. “Did you really think we’d let you go?”
“Yes,” I whisper. “He’s your son and?—”
“And you’re our fated mate,” he says, cutting me off. “Nothing will change that. We’re all in, Daria. We’re not giving you up.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” I warn, warmth flooding through my veins, despite my mind screaming that I should be careful. My heart won’t survive if they suddenly decide to break up with me.
“We’re not going to break it,” Kai says, running his arm down my back. “And since you’re getting evicted...maybe you’ll consider moving in?”
Moving in is a big step. A serious step. I told them I used to date their son, and they want me to move in? It’s fast. It’s crazy. It’s everything I’ve ever wanted. Before I can rationalize why it’s a bad idea, I sniff and say, “Okay.”
They’re my mates. My scent matches. Mine, mine, mine.
And I’m thinking I might get my happily ever after, after all.