Chapter Seventeen
The squirrel was knocking on Lucas’s window.
At first he thought he was still asleep and dreaming, but he took a
moment to collect himself and realized that he was, in fact, awake,
and had, in fact, been awakened by the rodent’s tiny paws tapping
at the glass. It was just after dawn, and Lucas had been planning
to sleep for another hour or so, but the squirrel obviously had
other ideas.
“I’m not going to feed you,” Lucas said to
the little gray face. “I don’t have any food in the room. And
besides, you’re getting fat.”
It was true. In the two months that Lucas had
been living at the halfway house, the squirrel had developed from a
scrawny, scruffy creature to a sleek and sturdy fellow. Partly it
was the change of season, Lucas reasoned, but the daily treats had
probably contributed as well.
“Do you like carrots? Or cucumbers? Something
that’s a little less fattening, that’s what you need.”
The squirrel cocked its head, then tapped the
glass again.
“You’re not coming inside,” Lucas said
firmly, but he swung his feet out of the warm bed and stumbled the
half-step to the window. “There’s no food. You’re a wild animal.
You can’t be trusted.”
The squirrel stepped back from the window in
clear anticipation of having it opened, and Lucas sighed as he
complied. As soon as the glass slid up, the squirrel skittered
forward, jumped quickly to the top of the battered wood dresser and
peered around curiously at the room. As the animal sat on its
haunches, Lucas noticed its belly, where the fur seemed to be
missing, or strangely tufted around…
“Oh, no. No, I looked it up. Squirrels have
babies in early spring. This is late spring. Not baby time.
I thought you were a dude!” The squirrel didn’t seem impressed by
Lucas’s arguments, so he decided to try a simpler approach. “No
babies in the room, squirrel. That’s house rules.”
He moved toward the squirrel, trying to look
slow and gentle, hoping to herd the animal back toward the window.
Why the hell had he opened it in the first place? What had he
thought was going to happen? “I thought you liked living outside.
Sunshine, and…it’s freedom, squirrel.”
He dropped heavily to sit on the bed. “Oh. Is
that it? Is it scary out there? You’re…okay, I still think it’s
wrong, but I guess you’re about to have some babies? And you want
somewhere safe for them? I was going to give you a lecture, but
yeah, it’s different with babies, isn’t it. I don’t know…”
The knock at his door was gentle, but it
still startled him to his feet. The squirrel jumped across the bed
in one great leap and scuttled down between the mattress and the
wall. Lucas thought about trying to dig her out, thought about
burrowing back under the covers, and briefly considered climbing
out the window himself. Instead, he crossed slowly to the door and
pulled it open.
“Father Groban. Hi. You’re up early.”
“Late, actually.” The priest kept his eyes on
Lucas, but there was something about the way he held himself that
made it clear he really wanted to peer inside the room. “I was up
all night with an ill parishioner, and I just wanted to pick some
paperwork up from here before I headed home for some sleep.”
“Oh. I hope the person’s going to be okay.
The parishioner.”
The priest shrugged. “She’s almost one
hundred and she’s had a full life. She’s ready for the next one. I
think she’s mostly just holding on because she’s worried about her
daughter. Elise is in her seventies, but she’s still Caroline’s
little girl.”
There wasn’t much to say to that, so Lucas
just stood there. Finally, Father Groban gave in to temptation and
took a quick look over Lucas’s shoulder. “I was out in the
driveway,” he said in a conversational tone, “and I looked up
toward the house and I could have sworn that I saw someone open a
window and let a squirrel inside. And now here we are, and I see
that your window is open. It’s not a question I thought I’d ever
ask, but, Lucas…is there a squirrel in your room?”
“Is that against the rules?” Lucas wasn’t
arguing, he just wanted to know how much trouble he was in. “I
mean, there’s the ‘no pets’ rule. I get that. But this isn’t a pet,
exactly…and I didn’t think she’d come in.” He tried to read Father
Groban’s expression. “I think she’s about to have babies, even
though it’s too late in the year. Or too early. I don’t think she’s
very good at being a squirrel.” He needed to stop talking about the
squirrel, so he wrapped up with an apologetic, “Maybe she’s looking
for a safe place.”
“And you think that your bedroom is suitable
for that?” The priest sighed. “She’ll probably go back out on her
own. If she doesn’t…I don’t know anything about squirrels. Do they
carry disease? Are they destructive?”
“They’re bossy,” Lucas said, since he really
couldn’t answer any of the other questions. “At least this one
is.”
“This is the squirrel you’ve been feeding?”
Father Groban stopped as if he’d suddenly been distracted by one of
his own thoughts, then paused for a moment’s reflection before
smiling. “Lucas, how’s the job hunt coming?”
Not something Lucas really wanted to think
about that early in the morning. “I finished the training course
last week. I’ve been filling out applications, but nothing yet.”
Nothing for months. Even after his bruises had faded, his history
was still a black mark.
“The training was in custodial work, right?
Cleaning, light repairs?”
“Yeah. I don’t think I really needed the
course in terms of getting new skills, but I guess it’s another
line to put on the resume, and it gave me something to do.”
Father Groban nodded. “But no interest from
employers yet.”
Lucas just raised an eyebrow, and the priest
seemed to get the message. “What about a bit of a twist on the
idea?” the priest asked. “Would you be interested in being a sort
of caretaker, helping a lady who’s getting on in years look after
her property and her animals?”
“You think somebody’s going to hire a felon
to work with an old lady? Seriously?”
“I think someone might.” The priest smiled.
“Elise, the daughter of my parishioner? She lives on a big place
out in the country, and her husband made good money, enough that
she never worked and is comfortable now that he’s gone. She’s spent
most of her life looking after injured or orphaned animals. Now
that she’s getting older she needs some help, but she’s being a bit
stubborn about it. I think I might be able to sell her on the idea
of hiring someone if she thought she was helping you as much as the
other way around.”
“You’d be taking a chance.” It was stupid to
pretend otherwise. “If something happened. If things went bad.
You’d take a lot of heat for recommending me for the job, knowing
what you do about me.”
“In case ‘something happened’?” Father
Groban’s gaze wasn’t hostile or even angry, but it was relentless.
“No. Don’t express it that way, as if a bad result would be out of
your control. And don’t beat around the bush. If you end up being
no good at taking care of orphaned animals, there’s not going to be
any heat on me. The only way this is a problem for me is if you
commit a crime. Violence would be the worst, obviously, but even
theft or vandalism would make me look bad.” His gaze stayed locked
on Lucas’s. “But I don’t think I need to worry about that. If I’m
wrong…if the man I’ve gotten to know over the last couple months
isn’t the real you…then yes, I’ll take some heat. But I don’t think
that’s going to happen. I’m willing to take a chance on you,
Lucas.”
That was when the squirrel made her
reappearance, skittering across the unmade bed like a novice ice
skater on a very rough rink. She leaped from the pillow to the
windowsill, glanced outside, then made another jump to land on top
of the dresser. She crouched there, one front paw raised in a
manner that made her look inquisitive, and stared at the
priest.
He stared back. “Wouldn’t a squirrel be
happier outside?” he asked cautiously.
“You’d think so,” Lucas agreed. It didn’t
seem like he was going to be getting in trouble for this incident,
so it was kind of interesting to try to figure out the animal’s
behavior. And easier to keep his emotions under control if he
ignored the rush of gratitude he’d felt at the priest’s expression
of trust. “I guess she’s okay with me because I’ve been feeding
her, but she doesn’t seem too worried about you, either.” The
squirrel had perched herself on her haunches, exposing her
bare-nippled belly for inspection. “Maybe she’s just really
confident. Or crazy.”
“Do you handle her?”
“No. I just put the food out, and she comes
to get it once I’m a few feet away.”
“You don’t want to touch her? She looks like
she’d be soft.”
“It doesn’t seem right.” Probably a sign that
Lucas was getting too comfortable in this place, if he was willing
to try to explain something like this to the priest, but he tried
not to worry about that. “She’s not a pet. Maybe I shouldn’t have
fed her—maybe that’s messing with nature too much. But she’s a wild
animal, even if she doesn’t act like it. It’s not…it’s not my place
to treat her like a pet.”
The priest nodded slowly, then said, “I don’t
understand that at all. But I bet Elise would. If you’re
interested, I can give her a call later today, and see if she’d
agree to a meeting, at least. She’s got a fair income but not
enough to pay you lavishly—you’d probably be looking at minimum
wage.”
“For doing repairs and looking after hurt
animals?” Lucas gave himself the luxury of imagining it, at least
for a moment, then pushed the dream firmly from his mind and tried
to sound nonchalant. “Yeah, okay, if you think she’d be interested.
It’d be nice to get some work, that’s for sure.”
“And your boss from roofing would still be
willing to give you a reference, at least for the time you were
working there?”
“I guess. He said he would.” He’d actually
said that he’d be happy to have Lucas back. He’d said his sister
and his worthless nephew could both shut up if they didn’t like it,
because Lucas was a hard worker and knew the job, and that was what
a businessman needed. But Lucas really couldn’t face the idea of
spending every day in Sean’s glowering presence, so he’d refused
the offer. He guessed it was technically breaking the terms of his
parole to be turning down work when he was supposed to be employed,
but he’d thought back to the night outside the police station and
figured that violating his parole wasn’t going to be quite as easy
as he’d originally feared. “Is there anything else I should do?
Like, do you want a copy of my resume?” He made a face. “There’s
not much on it.”
“I don’t think you’re going to get this job
with a resume,” Father Groban said. “If she’s at all interested,
she’ll want to meet you. When that happens, just be yourself,
Lucas. That’s all she needs to see.”
That seemed unlikely, but Lucas nodded
anyway. It wasn’t like he’d be any good at pretending to be someone
else. Better to fail honestly than fail while trying to lie. “Okay.
Thanks.” Father Groban turned away to yawn and Lucas realized how
exhausted the other man looked. The guilt hit as hard as it always
did. “You’re here because the other priest…Father Webber…because he
can’t be. Right? You’re doubling up on work because he can’t do his
job so you have to do it for him. Because of me. I’m sorry.”
But Father Groban shook his head firmly. “I
traded jobs with Mark. He’s doing more work with our youth group,
and with the choir. And he’s on a personal leave right now for a
whole other reason, nothing to do with any of this. I’m not
overworked, or at least not because of you. Stop taking
responsibility for the whole world, Lucas. It’s a form of arrogance
to think that everything revolves around you.”
The words were said with Father Groban’s
traditional kindness so they didn’t really sting, but they were
certainly something to think about. The squirrel looked up from the
toothpaste tube she’d been investigating and chattered at Lucas as
if she agreed, then whirled and leaped for the window. A quick
backward glance as she paused on the sill, then a flip of her tail
and she was gone. It was a good thing, Lucas told himself, and
tried to ignore the ridiculous sense of disappointment. The
squirrel shouldn’t be his pet, but maybe she could have been his
roommate. His friend.
“I need to go to bed,” the priest said
through another yawn. “But I’ll call Elise this afternoon, and let
you know what she says.”
“Thank you,” Lucas said. He used the words so
often that he was sure they just sounded like empty syllables to
his listeners, but Father Groban’s smile suggested that he realized
how sincere Lucas was.
“Try to get a bit more sleep,” the priest
suggested. “And if you can keep wildlife out of your room, that’d
probably be a good thing.”
“Yes, sir,” Lucas said, and he started for
the window as the priest gently closed the door behind himself and
headed off for his own well-earned rest.