Chapter 9
Marlow
Blake was so damn adorable when he was flustered.
As hard as it was to keep myself from crossing more boundaries than I already had, toeing the line and seeing where exactly what it was that made him crack was infinitely more fun.
As reserved as he tried to make himself seem, he was damn expressive to a fault.
To the point where I doubted he even knew how many faces he was capable of pulling.
The game was fun to play. And much more satisfying now that I knew he was definitely attracted to me. If his flustered demeanor didn’t clue me in, the boner in his shorts certainly did.
He was lucky we’d made it back to camp by the time I spotted that thing, or else I would’ve grabbed a hold of the wheel and driven us off the path to somewhere secluded so I could see just how turned on he was pretending he wasn’t.
Who knew Blake was a man of simple tastes?
But hey, I could handle that. I loved a partner who got off on anything. Even if that meant blowing in his ear and watching him bust in his shorts.
Now the challenge was getting him to lean into the desire he was clearly feeling, and convincing him to come back to my cabin to explore it.
I had a feeling he was new to all of this, given how out of sorts he was the past two times I’d made it quite obvious about my attraction toward him.
I usually wasn’t too keen on taking a virgin to bed—or rather in Blake’s case, a gay virgin—as they tended to get too clingy afterward, however, this was a special case.
Because by the end of it, we’d both be forced to move on. Blake was a busy man, and far too responsible to let himself get tangled up with me for the rest of these six weeks. One night together wouldn’t kill either of us, and once he was done and out of my system, I’d be able to breathe again.
Tonight was going to be the night—that’s what I’d decided on.
As long as Blake showed up at the bonfire, it was go-time.
To no one’s surprise, I was quickly cleared and sent on my way by the EMTs, just in time for the rest of the rafting group to arrive back for an early lunch.
Catching up with Luke and Aimee in order to pass the time for the rest of the day until sunset felt like a no-brainer, since keeping myself occupied until I could sneak off with Blake was going to be the ultimate test in patience.
He’d quickly run off the second the EMT had given me the thumbs up that I was good to go, spouting off something about checking in with the rest of the group and leaving me to fend for myself.
I had half a mind to follow him to see if he was telling the truth or bluffing in order to go hide away in his office, stopping myself at the last minute.
Overwhelming Blake was the worst thing I could do if I wanted him to trust me.
Coming off as overbearing and pushy, especially with a man with no experience in gay relationships, was setting myself up for a harsh rejection I wasn’t ready to receive.
Not until I actually had the chance to shoot my shot properly.
He seemed open to the idea, or at least attracted to it. That I could work with. It was all a matter of perspective and seeing things from his point of view, and how confusing all of this newness must be.
And who was I to deny helping him work through it?
Especially, since it seemed like he trusted me a good amount.
The day pushed forward at a sluggish pace, nearly making me tear my hair out the seventh time I looked at the clock and realized it was only three.
There was a part of me that kind of wished Blake took me up on my offer to help him plan his youth group event, even if it was to file papers while he figured out whatever logistics still needed to be worked on.
I missed the bump and grind of a laborious day.
Vacationing in the mountains near this incredible lake was amazing, there was no doubt about it. And yet, on some level, that sick and twisted part of my brain missed work. Missed the drudgery that came with toiling away at files and portfolios until I felt like I was going cross-eyed.
Avery would be appalled to know how much I missed being in my office only three and a half days into my vacation, while Silas would no doubt agree with me.
We were both workaholics by nature and with no boyfriends to occupy us outside of our 9-5’s like Avery had the luxury of—or in Silas’s case, 11-11’s—, there wasn’t much else we had going for us.
Sad?
Sure, but a reality nonetheless.
I didn’t hate it—far from it, actually. My brain needed to be worked. Like a border collie needed to herd their livestock. It was a driving need that would never be satiated until I got my hands on what gave me that ‘fix’ in the first place.
I hoped Blake was open to the idea. I wouldn’t push him, not if he gave me a hard stop and told me to fuck off.
But goddamn it, I needed him out from under my skin. I needed to scratch the itch before I tore myself apart trying to get to it.
Was that too much to ask for?
Nightfall came far too slowly.
By the time the bonfires were just starting to go up, I was pacing around the congressional area, my gaze pinned in the direction of Blake’s office. Too bad I didn’t know the exact building, or I’d be marching over there and dragging him out of that office myself.
“Marlow...” Turning to the sound of my name, I spotted Aimee walking over to me, a smile playing on her lips. “We snagged a few beers if you want to join us.”
A Nah was on the tip of my tongue, barely held back while I scoped a look back over my shoulder to make sure I hadn’t missed Blake trying to sneak by in the five seconds I wasn’t hawk-eyeing the entire campground.
“A drink, you say. How generous.”
She let out a giggle behind her hand, waving her other toward me. “Come on, Luke saved us a seat.”
Us was said in a poignant way. Filled with promises of an evening with her and her husband just on the horizon.
I supposed it was rather shitty of me to keep them on the back burner until I got this Blake thing all sorted out.
However, at the same time, I also wasn’t exactly ready to sit them both down and have that annoying, and frankly tiring, conversation about how being gay meant I was only attracted to men and no matter how much a woman swayed her hips at me, the old pecker wasn’t interested.
Not to mention, I wasn’t exactly in the mood to ruin whatever night was in store for me with a tough reality check to poor Aimee. I wasn’t a stranger to women finding me attractive, the hard part was letting them down gently.
Following after her, I snagged the beer that was held out to me by her husband and settled down on the log furthest away from them that faced out toward the main part of the camp.
Were the staff camps over by ours?
Or were they tucked back somewhere else?
And how far away was Blake’s office from them?
“So, Marlow...” Luke took a long swig of his beer. “Heard you were caught up in some trouble earlier.”
“Oh, saving poor Ellen? All in a day’s work, my friend.”
Aimee giggled. “There’s a rumor going around that you pulled her out of the water yourself. Dove right in after she went overboard.”
“What can I say, I like to play hero sometimes.”
Where the fuck was Blake?
It was well past sunset and the sky was rapidly becoming dark.
“What else do you like to play?”
The hand that suddenly found my thigh wasn’t subtle in the slightest, nor was the way long fingernails walked up toward my crotch and settled right near the junction of my hip.
Ripping my attention away from the roaming crowd of people coming and going from the mess hall, I glanced down to Aimee’s red fingernails hand.
Nothing stirred. Not even an iota of interest.
Poor thing.
Look, if I had a choice, I’d take up the offer. Turning down sex was stupid, especially if a threesome was a strong possibility. I liked the chaos that came with the confusing mess of tangled limbs and frantic touching. It was fun and messy and all the kinds of things I liked about sex.
I hated formality. The mechanics of going through the motions.
What was the point in living if everything felt robotic?
“So, confession time,” I said, throwing back a healthy swig of my own. “I’m picking up some vibes from you guys.”
“Oh?” Aimee leaned forward. “And what kind of vibes are those?”
I had to hand it to her, I loved the unapologetic nature she possessed. She clearly was a woman who knew what she wanted and wasn’t about to back down in the face of possible rejection or embarrassment.
It was damn admirable. And also a damn shame it wasn’t doing anything for me.
“So, I’m into men,” I said, flashing a quick smile.
“What a coincidence.” Her own smile widened. “So are we.”
Nice.
My gaydar was so damn good it was scary sometimes.
“Wow, that is a crazy coincidence,” I replied.
Her hand squeezed my thigh. “So, why don’t you say we sneak back to our cabin and get to know each other a little better?”
Well, it wasn’t like I was doing anything else. And clearly, Blake was off hiding wherever, or holed up in his office still, avoiding the entire world. Which gave my chest a little bit of a twinge—a sting to my pride, as it were.
I wasn’t trying to overstep the line of whatever it was between us by huge margins, at least not in the way that had him too scared to run into me. He was a busy man, not exactly the type to be running around and hanging out at bonfires while sipping on a beer or two after work.
My paranoia was all likely in my head anyway and was giving me far too much fodder to read into.
This entire place was his job. Not a hangout spot like it was for me and the rest of the guests staying here.
Just go, what’s stopping you?
Slapping my free hand against my thigh, I pushed myself up onto my feet again. My beer swung at my side, the liquid inside of it sloshing dangerously as I turned toward the mess hall again out of instinct, freezing the second I spotted a figure standing close to me.
My eyes widened.
Blake had his arms crossed over his chest, a loose-fitting zip-up jacket draped over his shoulders, one side having fallen to reveal part of his tanned arm.
The reflection of the fire caught in his eyes, creating a mesmerizing glow that seemed to come from within, bursting out of him like the sun, barely being contained inside of his body.
The scowl that was plastered on his beautiful face was so out of place that it took me a minute to register it was being directed at me.
Well, that’s a first.
Before I could open my mouth, he said, “Came to check on you. How’s your head.”
I furrowed my brows.
My head?
The last time I checked, I’d been looked at for muscle strains and possible torn ligaments trying to move through the water that was fighting tooth and nail to take me as one of its victims. I wasn’t aware that anyone, Talos, Blake, or the EMTs, were worried about a possible head injury.
Unless that was simply a convenience excuse. If so, it was clever and not at all revealing as to the true reason Blake was seeking me out.
“I didn’t...” My voice trailed off the second I noticed his attention being directed toward Aimee and Luke, that stormy expression becoming downright turbulent.
Oh.
Oh, this is good.
I liked jealousy.
Twisting at my waist, I set my beer bottle down on the log I’d taken up residence on only a moment before and shot them both a wink before turning back around. Blake was focused back on me, his shoulders bunched up near his ears. That wasn’t doing anything to hide his mood.
Adorable.
Seriously.
Why was he still single?
I stepped toward him and threw my arm out to catch him around the shoulders. I cupped the side where his bare arm was and pulled him closer to me, a soft noise escaping him that shot straight down to my dick.
“Why don’t we go talk, hmm?”
He sucked in a sharp breath. “Uh...”
I didn’t give him time to over think this one.
Not when I was so damn close to getting what I wanted—what we both clearly wanted.
I wasn’t about to let this man talk himself out of giving in to his desires that he clearly was used to squashing down until they were nothing but dust floating away in the wind.
“Marlow,” he mumbled, stumbling into me as I guided him away from the bonfire.
“You wanted to play doctor and check on me, right?” I didn’t even need to look at his face to know his freckled cheeks were growing red at a rapid pace. “Why don’t we do that somewhere more private, hmm?”
“Goddamn it.” I heard him mumble under his breath as I whisked him away.