Chapter 25 #2
Holding out my hand, I gestured for him to come closer. Obediently, he walked into my room, his steps careful and cautious. Breaking him out of seeing me as fragile would be difficult. My still-healing body, a constant reminder of how he found me, wasn’t doing either of us any favors.
Whatever Blake’s hangups were, whatever was preventing him from falling back into those easy laughs and poignant jabs, needed to be taken care of before we could move on to an actual fruitful future.
If he wanted one with me, that is.
“Your leg hurt?” he asked the moment his hand found mine.
I tugged him forward. “Come here.”
His brows knitted together but he still allowed me to pull him up onto the bed, swinging a leg over my waist when I curled my free hand under the backside of his knee and tugged.
He was mindful with settling himself down onto my hips, keeping most of his weight pressed forward into the mattress by leaning onto his knees.
We were at an awkward angle with how I had one leg, my good one, dangling off the edge of the bed while the other was slightly hiked up onto it, my hip popped out at an angle to keep my leg from cramping inside of my cast. The damn thing was, thankfully, not up to my thigh, a threat Silas had made damn sure to pass onto me if he caught wind of me misbehaving and not using my crutches.
Still, having Blake sitting on me made up for the slight twinge in my back.
“Much better.” I grinned.
He huffed out a short laugh. “I don’t think we should be doing this. Weren’t you just complaining about your ribs yesterday?”
“Nonsense. Silas said thirty minutes of exercise a day is good for me.”
“I think he meant walking around your house.”
“If he did, he should’ve been more specific.”
Blake simply shook his head, leaning away as if to get up again.
I clamped my hands down on his thighs, keeping him pinned against me. “And where do you think you’re going?”
His eyes went wide. “Marlow.”
His shirt was easy to slip my hands under, his body jumping at the sudden contact.
He was warm and pliable under my touch. Leaning into it without meaning to while he let himself go for a split second before his mind caught up to him and told him no.
His lips parted as I reached his waist, moving my hands up to his chest and flattening both palms there.
He grabbed at my wrists, keeping them in a tight hold. “We... shouldn’t.”
As he spoke, he rolled his hips against mine, drawing a moan out of both of us.
“I won’t break, Blake. If that fall didn’t kill me, this definitely won’t.”
Whatever I said seemed to break the spell immediately.
Gloom returned to his eyes while the corners of his lashes grew wet with tears.
My heart squeezed, watching the pinch between his brows become more pronounced by the second.
He slid my hands out from under his shirt, pushing them back toward my body in an effort to untangle himself from me.
“No.” I grabbed at him again, snatching his arm before he could fully pull away from me. “We’re not doing this.”
“Please,” was all he said.
“I’m not letting you push me away. Not this time.”
His breath hitched. “I’m not trying to.”
“You are if you keep acting like I’m still in that damn hospital bed.”
He bowed his head, shame causing his shoulders to sink.
Reaching up slowly, I traced my thumb along his temple to his cheek, cupping my other fingers around his jaw to keep him from moving again.
The small and dejected sigh that came tumbling from his mouth only served to make me tighten my hold on him.
“Listen,” I spoke softly. “I know you feel bad. I hate to see you continuing to kick yourself over something you had no control over. I’m okay. Better, actually, with you staying here with me. I only wish you could give yourself some grace.”
His watery eyes met mine. “When I found you... I didn’t—I thought...” He swallowed thickly. “It follows me in my dreams.”
Oh, Blake.
That explained the poor sleep.
“I’m sorry you were the one to find me.” No one should ever have to stumble upon a sight like that, trained or not.
“I’m not.” His hand was tight where he grabbed my wrist. “I got to make sure I was the one who kept you still breathing. There was no other person I would’ve trusted to do it over me.”
Yes, and shouldering all of the responsibility along the way, I almost retorted with.
As per usual, Blake’s overwhelming responsibility with holding everything together, even in the face of a potential tragedy, was ever present.
I had no doubt Talos helped as much as he could but there was no way Blake hadn’t kept my care solely up to him.
How hard had he fought to keep himself levelheaded while Talos called for help?
How many times did he pray for me to open my eyes to make sure I was actually still in there and not long gone while my body fought to continue going?
None of it seemed fair for him to harbor that amount of culpability. If anything, he was a damn hero in my eyes. The moment I’d realized he was there with me was the moment all felt right in the world.
He breathed out slowly. “I’m just... I’m glad I started out earlier on that hike than I planned. I got to the peak a little after you fell. Something was telling me to go before the sun was up, so I did.”
Using my hold on him, I forced him into bending forward, curling my other arm around his waist from behind to help flatten him against my body.
His cheek was slightly damp against my bare chest, a slow exhale shuddering out of him the moment I locked my arm in place.
His hair was soft as I threaded my fingers through the tangled lengths, cupping the side of his face to keep him there.
“Hear it?” I asked. “My heart beats because of you. I’m alive because of you.”
As soon as he started to shake his head, I tightened my hand to stop him.
“I mean it.”
His body stiffened. “Do you... you actually like me being here with you?”
“Absolutely.” There was no hesitation in my voice, nor in how swiftly the confirmation fell from my mouth. “If falling off a fucking cliff is what got you to come home with me, then I’d do it all over again.”
He scoffed. “That’s morbid.”
“And true.”
I felt a shiver move under his skin the moment I slipped my hand under his shirt again, tracing the dimples etched into his lower back.
I loved touching him. I loved the small twitches and faint sighs he made from something so simple as me tracing a nonsensical pattern wherever I pleased.
I loved his hidden masochism and how fucked up he liked to get as I made a mess of him.
I loved those bright smiles and the way his eyes sparkled when the sun hit them just right.
Everything about this man, I wanted to keep all for myself. I wouldn’t be letting him go so easily, not when I was right on the precipice of this, hopefully, being a permanent thing. There would be no one after him—no one could compare.
I wanted to memorize every goddamn inch of him. To be able to conjure him even in my dreams. I wanted to know every little thing that made him tick and everything that made him come undone. There would be nothing left hidden from me by the time I was done.
“No more adventure sports,” he muttered.
“Can’t stop me from trespassing onto your property.” Technically, he could, but I’d gotten my way around plenty of figurative and actual fences in my time.
“Should I be scared I ended up saving a stalker?”
The light teasing in his voice made me breathe out a sigh of relief.
Was he finally coming back to me?
“Can’t stalk someone who likes it.”
He forced his head up from my chest, a vague kind of smile playing on his lips. “You’re trouble. You know that? I could just ban you from the property. Have police posted outside the entrance all summer.”
“Is this a bad time to remind you I have a billionaire friend?”
He rolled his eyes, pinching my side lightly. “Yeah, let me know when that lawsuit is supposed to hit my desk. I want to have a fresh bottle of whiskey unsealed and ready to go.”
“To party, I hope,” I egged on. “It’s not every day someone gets sued.”
“Are you trying to say I’m special?”
“To me? Definitely.”
His smile widened ever so slightly. “Maybe I’ll sue you right back for fucking up my ratings and scaring my whole staff with the airlift.”
I gasped. “A countersuit. I’d be honored.”
I hooked two of my fingers under the hem of his pants, teasing the spot right above one of his ass cheeks.
The sudden levity in our conversation was tempting me too much to talk me out of sliding my hand down between his firm cheeks until I had both digits pressed against his hole.
The resounding gasp when I finally reached my destination further encouraged me into circling around it slowly.
“Remember how you were naughty and kept those condoms from me?”
He groaned in response, hiking one leg up to give me better access.
Pulling my hand out from his pants briefly, I shoved my fingers into my mouth, coating them both in spit before replacing them right back where they belonged. A hard shiver shook Blake’s entire body, his jaw dropping in time with his lashes fluttering closed.
“You’re sure?” He shoved back against my hand, nearly penetrating himself. “I won’t hurt you?”
“You could never.”
He groaned once more the second I slipped a finger into him, his tight heat burning me. Rising slightly from where he’d been held against me, he shifted back just enough to push the finger deeper, clenching around it immediately.
Holy fuck.
This man got hotter and hotter as the days rolled on.
“Just imagine.” My lungs were practically punching the air out of me. “How much better my cock is going to feel.”