Chapter 12
As we walk into the challenge area just before noon the next morning, the sun is promising yet another warm day.
As usual, Alex and the other tribe are waiting for us as we walk in and take our spot on the purple mat.
“Sika, getting your first look at the Meru tribe,” Alex says.
“Juan voted out at the last tribal council.”
I look over at the other tribe to gauge their reaction to this news.
There are some frowns and shaking heads, but nobody looks particularly surprised.
The two former Merus react differently: Jing gives a brief smile, while Cole grins widely and clenches his fist at his side.
It still feels strange seeing the two of them standing on the other mat, and I let my eyes rest on Cole for a bit longer than strictly necessary before returning my attention to Alex.
As much as I’ve enjoyed not having to constantly police my own thoughts and actions for the last couple of days, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss him.
Alex waits for the reactions to die down, then says, “Once again, you are playing for immunity. Sika, I’ll take back the idol.
” He proceeds to do so, placing the idol on the podium.
“You’ll also be playing for reward,” he continues.
“Instead of immediately returning to camp, the winning tribe will be taken to a different island, where we’ve set up a barbecue feast—ribs, chicken, potato salad, cold drinks, and brownies and ice cream for dessert.
Sound like something worth playing for?” He pauses while we all cheer and clap.
“All right. In that case, let’s get to it.
“For today’s challenge, you’ll work together to dig up a ladder that we’ve buried in the sand.
You’ll then carry the ladder to a tall pole, where one tribe member will climb up and get a key while the others hold the ladder steady.
Next, you’ll use the key to unlock a chest containing bags of puzzle pieces.
Finally, two tribe members will use the puzzle pieces to complete a three-dimensional tree puzzle.
Sika—you have one extra member. Who’s going to be sitting out?
” He points to Sika, and Green Hat raises his hand.
“All right, Randy sitting out for Sika. I’ll give both tribes a minute to strategize, and we’ll get started. ”
After a short delay to decide who will be performing which portions of the challenge, and so Neema and Steve can give us our walkthrough, we’re all set. As he’s done so many times before, Alex raises his hand in the air. “Castaways: ready … set … GO!” he shouts.
On the last word, all ten of us, excluding Green Hat—Randy, apparently—rush out to two rectangular areas of sand marked by flags at the corners, and begin searching for our ladders.
My tribe starts in the middle, using our hands to dig.
It isn’t long before Rhonda unearths a purple-colored rung, but the ladder is tall enough that even once we know where it is, it still takes a while to get it all the way out.
I shovel sand as best I can, feeling like a dog trying to dig up a bone.
Eventually, we’ve got enough of the ladder uncovered that we can lift it out of the hole we’ve dug, shaking the last bits of sand off it.
Shouts from the other tribe indicate that they’ve done the same.
We carry our ladder over to the next station, leaning it against the pole as Marina climbs up to grab the key while the other four hold it steady.
As soon as she’s back down, we run to the chest, and Marina unlocks it.
Once she’s done, Alina and I step forward, taking as many pieces as we can carry and sprinting them over to where we’ll assemble the puzzle.
When Alex said we’ll be making a tree puzzle, I wasn’t quite sure what he meant, but when I saw it during the walkthrough, it made sense: the base is a piece of wood cut to look like the trunk of a tree, with branches sticking out of them, and the pieces are shaped like leaves, with indentations to match protrusions on the branches of the tree base.
While we’re carrying the second armload of pieces over to the “tree,” I quickly spare a glance over to the other tribe. It looks like they’re a little bit ahead of us, but just barely, so I put my head down and focus on the task at hand. Come on, Ryan. You can do puzzles in your sleep.
Finally, Alina and I have all the pieces over to the base, and we begin assembling the puzzle.
It’s hard at first—there are just so many leaf pieces that it’s hard to find the right one to match any given branch.
We place one, then another and another, slowly but surely working through the pile of unplaced pieces.
Still, it feels like each one takes forever, and I start to get nervous.
We need to go faster! Pausing for the barest of seconds, I quickly glance over to see how the other tribe is doing, hoping that we’re at least not too far behind.
When I see their puzzle, I almost do a double take.
I thought Alina and I were moving slowly, but we’re a good ten pieces ahead of Sika—a substantial lead, considering there are only thirty or so pieces total.
Did they fall behind earlier? No, they were right alongside us; I could hear them unlocking their chest and dropping their puzzle pieces on the ground.
Besides, the two Sika puzzlers are moving at an unhurried pace, which they wouldn’t do if they knew they had to catch up to us.
Are they trying to lose? I mean, it certainly looks like it, but that can’t be true. Why would they want to—
And then it hits me like a ton of bricks. They are losing on purpose! I freeze, mentally kicking myself. I should have seen this coming! They have to know that if we lose, Alina is going home, and they’ll be down six to four when we merge. Of course they want to throw the challenge!
Suddenly, I feel lightheaded, and there’s a ringing sound in my ears. It’s not too late! I can stop building the puzzle and hope that they don’t notice. I can—
But then Alina places another piece, and I realize that even if I sat down and ignored the puzzle, she has every incentive to keep going. It might take her twice as long, but that wouldn’t matter, since Sika isn’t going to give her any competition. I’d only be delaying the inevitable.
So with a nauseous feeling in my stomach, I get back to work on the puzzle, wanting to just get it over with. When Alina places the last piece and Alex shouts out, “Meru! Wins immunity!” my tribemates celebrate behind me, but it’s all I can do not to break down and cry.
As Alex promised, instead of taking us back to our tribe camp, the motorboat takes us to a different beach, where a table laden with food and drink awaits.
In other circumstances, I might be excited, but now all I can think about is what I know will happen at tonight’s tribal.
I load up my plate mechanically—I may be upset, but I’m not going to pass up this opportunity to eat—while doing my best not to show how I’m feeling.
Either the others haven’t realized that Sika threw the challenge, or they haven’t realized the implications, because they all seem happy and carefree.
I’m not going to tell them just yet. No need to ruin the party for everyone else.
Fortunately, while we’re eating, the conversation is light-hearted, sticking to things like how this food compares to what we have at home, how much better it is than our usual fare—that sort of thing.
I still jump in and add something every now and then, but for the most part, I remain silent.
Hopefully, the others think I’m just focused on eating as much as I can.
Apparently, I didn’t fool everyone, because when we get back to camp, Rhonda immediately pulls me aside. “You all right, chile?” she asks, her voice thick with concern. “You were a million miles away durin’ the reward.”
“Not really.” I pause, gathering my thoughts, and take a deep breath. “Did it seem to you like the other tribe kinda just … gave up once they got to the puzzle?”
“To be honest, I wasn’t really watchin’ them. I was focused on you and Alina. I guess I saw their puzzle after Alex called the challenge, and it did seem like they shoulda done better. But why …” She frowns deeply. “Now, hold on just a minute. You don’t think they lost on purpose, do you?”
“That’s exactly what I think. I’m betting they decided before they even left their beach that Cole needs to go home tonight.”
“Still, that don’t explain why you’re so upset. We all knew that Cole and Jing were vulnerable over there, but you wanted to win just as much as the rest of us.”
“I’m upset because I should have thought of it first!
” The words tumble out of me, true in their own way, if not necessarily the whole truth.
“If we had done the same thing, maybe we could’ve figured out a way to let them win.
Then Alina would be going home, and we’d have the advantage.
Now, if we merge tomorrow, there will be five of them and five of us, and who knows whether Jing will still want to be on our side? ”
Rhonda’s frown dissipates as she steps forward and hugs me.
“Oh, honey, you can’t do everything by yourself,” she says.
“Besides, if they really were set on losin’, do you think they would have just changed their minds if we just sat there and twiddled our thumbs?
Naw, we’d all still be sittin’ there, trying to make the other tribe break first. And I don’t know about you, but I’d have been mighty pissed if I lost out on that barbecue. ”
I smile despite myself. “That’s true. It would have been a sad challenge if both tribes were trying to lose.”
“You’re damn right it would be.” She laughs, but it fades away quickly.
“And as for what happens at the merge … well, we don’t know what’s going to happen tonight, much less in the next two weeks.
It’s like you and Katie love to say—anything can happen in this game.
” She lightly punches my shoulder. “All I’m sayin’ is, don’t count us out just yet. ”
The rest of day seventeen is absolute torture for me.
Rhonda must have told Katie and Marina about our discussion on the beach earlier, or maybe they deduced it for themselves.
Either way, they’re just as subdued as I am that night, when we should be celebrating the fact that we’re not heading to tribal council.
The only one who doesn’t seem quite as funereal is Alina, although she’s not exactly jumping for joy either.
I can’t blame her for being relieved. Had we lost, she’d probably be going home tonight.
And despite what I told Rhonda, the fact that we lost our chance to go into the merge with a numbers advantage isn’t really what’s bothering me.
I mean, it’s not ideal, but Rhonda was right when she said that nobody knows what could happen in the next few days.
Assuming we do merge tomorrow, we’ll be even at five, at worst. That isn’t great, but also, isn’t the end of the world either.
No, the worst part is that I should be jubilant, because this is the perfect opportunity to have Cole go home without getting a single drop of blood on my hands.
I know the Sikas are going to target either him or Jing, because they wouldn’t have thrown the challenge if they weren’t absolutely sure they could get rid of one of them.
Of the two, Cole is the obvious choice—no disrespect to Jing, but Cole is a much bigger threat than she is.
If the Sikas find out that he’s part of our alliance and Jing isn’t, they’ll almost have to get rid of him.
And yet, even though I should be positively giddy right now, all I can think about is how much I’ll miss Cole, and all the countless talks and smiles and jokes and glances we could have shared for the next few weeks.
That’s exactly why he needed to go home, I tell myself.
If he can make someone like me feel this way, then how could I possibly beat him at the end?
But knowing that doesn’t make me feel any better, and I go to sleep earlier than usual that night, feeling like the weight of the world is on my shoulders.
Day 18
I sleep in later than usual the next morning and wake to the sound of a motorboat. For a moment, in my half-awake state, I’m a little confused—we just had an immunity challenge yesterday. Could there be another twist?
And then it hits me, and I sit up so fast it’s like I’ve been possessed. It’s the merge! The boat must be bringing the Sikas to our beach—usually, the producers pick one or the other tribe’s camp, so we don’t have to start from scratch.
I get up, now fully awake, and walk down to the beach to greet my new tribemates. Alina, Rhonda, Katie, and Marina are already waiting there. “We made it,” Katie says softly. “I thought I was going to be the first one voted out, but here I am at the merge.”
I take her hand and squeeze it; she gives me a brief smile before returning her attention to the boat.
At first, it’s just a speck on the horizon, too far away to make out individual faces.
As it draws closer, I can see there are six people on the boat—the five Sikas plus the captain—but the boat goes up and down with the waves, making it hard to see any one person for long enough to identify them.
I keep an eye out for Cole or Jing, hoping to see the former, even though I think it's unlikely.
And then Marina reaches up to shade her eyes with one hand and squints. “I don’t believe it,” she says. “Is that …?”
She trails off just as the boat crests a wave, leaving her question unasked.
But I know exactly what she was going to say, because standing towards the front of the boat is Cole, his blond hair flying in the wind, his wide smile unmistakable even from here.
For a bare second, I wonder if it’s a mirage, if I’m so desperate to have him back that I’m just seeing what I want to see.
And then Rhonda lets out a big, “Whoop!” and Katie waves and calls out his name, and I know he’s real.
A feeling of relief crashes into me like a wave, leaving me weak all the way down to my toes.
I can’t believe they didn’t vote him out last night!
The unexpected strength of it almost bowls me over, so powerful I feel like I’m going to collapse to my knees, and it’s only through intense effort that I remain standing.
A tear of joy streams down my cheeks, then another, and I’m sure I must look like an idiot, but I don’t care.
Right now, all that matters is the fact that Cole is back, happy and healthy and here with me, where he belongs.