Epilogue five
Widow
Seven years after that fateful December…
I’m so nervous about this gift, pacing back and forth in front of the Christmas tree with my hands in my hair. Jack just touched it up for me, so it’s not overly long. I’ve tousled it so much that my fingers get tangled anyway.
“You’re even making me nervous,” Scarlett says, pausing beside me in a silk robe that hangs enticingly off her beautiful shoulders. She leans against the edge of the doorjamb, this soaring arch outfitted with real wood molding, shiny and black. This custom-built home is a fucking palace.
It’s set in the middle of the woods in some nowhere town in Massachusetts called Peru. It even snows around here, a blanket of white outside that’s nothing like the winters back home.
I stop pacing and force my arms to my sides, studying Scarlett and her red-clad form, silhouetted against the oversized windows with all that white forest behind her.
She doesn’t even look human. Ink-black hair coils over one shoulder and down the front of her body.
Those perfect hands of hers stroke down the length of it, like she’s playing an instrument to lure me in.
“I’m resisting the urge to wake everyone up.
Pound up the stairs. Shake their shoulders.
” I shrug, like it’s not a big deal for me to experience shit at age twenty-five that I should’ve experienced when I was six.
It’s Christmas morning, and I’m giddy. I’m excited.
I don’t even care that it’s also my birthday.
“If you want to, you should.” Scarlett sweeps into the room, opening her arms and simultaneously falling into mine. “Happy birthday, Adrian Arden Force.”
I hold her close, letting my heavy lids fall shut on the silence.
We’re the only ones in this house. Ninety acres of empty forest surrounds us on all sides. Behind the property, there are two wildlife refuges. It feels remote and quiet and peaceful.
Our own private universe.
“Thank you, princess.” I press my cheek against her hair, rubbing my hands over her back as she melts against me.
“Can I ask you a question, Adrian? Something’s been bugging me.
” Scarlett looks up, frowning in thought as she studies my face in the early morning winter sun.
It reflects blindingly off all that white outside, casting prisms of color all throughout the house.
One of Ash and Alexei’s poison dart frogs croaks, occupying the floor-to-ceiling terrarium on the left side of the room.
We have dozens and dozens of frogs in there. Some are neon yellow. Others are orange with dark spots. Blue ones with big black eyes. Not only does Ash enjoy keeping them as pets, but Alexei also finds them useful in maintaining his supply of batrachotoxin.
Just in case.
“Morning.” Bohnes glides down the hallway, naked, and then stands at the front window so that he can stare out at the deck and the gorgeous sunrise just beyond the trees.
I can see his entire skeleton tattoo, drawn in black ink against his pale white skin.
He practically blends into the snow beyond the glass. “I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”
“Scarlett was just about to ask me a question.” I take a small step back from her and fold my arms. “Go ahead.”
“You know my twenty-fifth birthday was two months ago, right?” she begins carefully.
Shit.
“Obviously. We had that big, ol’ ratchet Prescott party. Wolfman was supposed to DJ, but he was preoccupied with Emma Jean and kept playing baby, come back music.”
“To be fair, baby did go back,” Scarlett adds with a grin, losing the seriousness of the conversation for a moment.
It doesn’t last. She takes a small step toward me again, peering into my face.
“For years—years—you’ve harassed me about my twenty-fifth birthday.
On the day of, that’s when you stopped mentioning it. I’m confused.”
Shuffling footsteps precede Ash as he wanders down the hallway, wearing pajama pants and a sword.
He feels more comfortable in new places if he’s got a weapon.
We haven’t owned this house for very long.
And this is our literal first time in Massachusetts.
How the fuck should we know what’s out here?
“Coffee?” Ash points around the room, but not like he’s actually asking. He knows we all want some. “Alexei is in the shower.”
Soon as he gets here, I’m giving Ash his present. I can’t wait any longer. I’m antsy about it.
“Scarlett, the deal about kids was that I had the right to pull the trigger on parenthood. Well, I ain’t ready yet. Are you trying to pressure me into giving you a baby?” I pretend to scowl at her, to remove suspicion that I might actually be going out of my way to do her a favor.
I would love to have a baby with Scarlett. I don’t think Scarlett would love to have a baby with anyone though. Not yet.
I’m not sure at this point if I’m sparing her that fate because I’m trying to be nice, or if I’m dragging out the torture of it happening in the future. Either way, reverse psychology never hurts.
“Dude, you know that I’m not interested in kids unless you guys really want it. It just seems weird to me that you’re all obsessed over it until the time in which it can actually happen. Seems sus is all.” Scarlett shrugs like it’s no big deal. It is. This is a huge deal. I want a baby so badly.
I love her so much. Scarlett’s needs and wants are more important to me than my own.
I just don’t feel like admitting it out loud.
“The water pressure here is fantastic.” Alexei appears with heat-reddened skin, a towel slung around his neck, and red silk pants that match well with Scarlett’s robe.
They look like a married couple when they stand next to each other.
Matching inked wedding rings. The snake ring stacked up with the one I welded, the diamond Ash gave her, and the shitty skull one that Bohnes won at the arcade.
“I’m already dreading the day we have to leave. ”
“We’re free through New Year’s. After this next movie, I’m going to take a break and focus on social media anyway.
We’ll film me behind the wheel. That’s where I want to be, somewhere with a higher dose of adrenaline.
” Scarlett moves over to the sofa and flops down on it, seemingly finished with the conversation about babies.
We’ll figure that out later.
I’m not going to climb on top of her while she squeezes her eyes shut in dread, disgusted at the feel of me when she usually loves it. That’s sick. I’ll wait until she asks for a baby instead. Like that’ll ever happen.
“I’ll help Ash with the coffee,” Alexei murmurs, giving me an odd look before he slips out of the room.
Bohnes pads over to me, a pair of sweatpants slung over one arm. Right there in the middle of the living room, with the window as a backdrop, he bends over and starts tugging first one leg and then the other over his feet. Pulls ‘em up nice and slow. Meets my eyes.
“Don’t be too soft on Scarlett. She has four husbands, Adrian.” Bohnes wanders past me to claim the spot next to Scarlett. “You are also too nice.”
“Dude, shut it.” Scar rests her head on his shoulder, eyes half-lidded and smile coy.
Ash and Alexei return to the living room together, each of them carrying an extra mug. They pass them all out before Ash dips back in for a cup of tea for himself. Fortunately, he’s quick, seating himself on the floor beside the coffee table.
Once I’ve got them all there, I can’t resist. I set my drink on the table and bend down beside the tree, carefully sliding a box out of the branches. I take it right to Ash, holding it out with a determined expression on my face.
“For me?” Ash sets his own mug down and accepts the package, giving the other three curious looks.
They know what’s in this package because I coordinated with them beforehand to make this happen.
Sadly, Scarlett is pretty strict about her ‘don’t get your hands dirty’ rule.
I had to use some favors I earned in juvie to make this work.
Ash takes his time undoing the ribbon on the box. He slides the lid back and takes a moment to identify the item inside. Once he does, he lifts his head with bloodlust shining in his black eyes.
“Is this…” he begins, and I shrug one shoulder, like it’s no big deal.
“Your kidney.” It really is. I’m not fucking around.
The second Jonas was released on parole, I had a guy follow him and torture him for a few days.
Retrieve Ash’s kidney. Take him round to Chet’s old crematorium (which is under the Borisov Group’s management now).
This is the only bit of him that’s left.
“I promised you I’d be the one to deal with Jonas.
Well, he’s dealt with. You don’t have to worry about him ever again. ”
Ash leaps up and throws his arms around me, hugging me like I’m his twin. If I had been, we’d have had an entirely different life together. I would’ve stuck by my brother’s side, not thrown him to the wolves.
“Oh, look, I’ve started a tradition of gifting body parts,” Bohnes says with a dreamy sigh, and Scarlett snorts, playing with the crescent moon made of bone that she wears around her neck. Mine’s in a drawer upstairs. Even if I don’t always wear it, it’s never far.
“When you’re finished with it, toss the foul thing into the fire.
It smells horrendous.” Alexei flicks his fingers in the direction of the roaring flames, crackling beautifully in the oversized fireplace.
I’m good at starting fires with wood. Good at chopping it, too.
That’s all my handiwork. Not bad for a city kid, huh?
“It does smell pretty bad.” Ash smiles as he steps back, studying the shriveled organ in the box. “How long have you been holding onto this?”
“Two days,” I say with a curl of my lip. “Took the guy a minute to drive it all the way here and deliver it.”
Ash walks over to the fireplace and kneels down, peering at the kidney that was stolen from him. While he was awake. Every once in a while, he wakes up screaming.
Jonas Kelly is lucky to have been burned alive. If I’d been allowed to touch him with my bare hands, it would’ve been worse.
Ash throws the box and its macabre contents into the fire, watching as it catches and begins to burn with an acrid smoke that’s drawn quickly up the chimney and away.
“Merry Christmas,” I say, which is lame as hell and yet, the absolute only thing that’ll come to mind.
“Happy birthday,” Ash corrects, standing up and putting another little metal car in my hand.
He gives me one every year. I keep them on a shelf in whatever room we happen to be staying in at the moment.
The room I always share with three other guys and the most demanding woman the world has ever seen.
I am fucking lucky that I stole that parking space.
“Weren’t you planning to play the guitar for us, Adrian?
” Alexei asks, relaxing back on the couch without bothering to put his shirt on.
No gloves either. He’s bare-chested and relaxed, tousling his blond hair with his fingers as he studies me with languid green eyes. “You did promise a song or two.”
“He promised three.” Scarlett rests a hand on Alexei’s thigh, her eyes glittering as she taunts me with a look. “The kidney thing was cute, but you’re not getting out of this.”
“Only if Ash is okay with it,” I say, glancing down at him as he takes a seat, cross-legged, beside the coffee table. Ash picks up his mug of tea.
“I’m more than okay with it. Serenade us, Adrian.”
“Well, I am not okay with it,” Bohnes interjects as I sigh, moving over to the wall to remove the guitar that’s hanging there.
“Someone has to be on Adrian’s side. If he doesn’t want to perform, let him be.
It’s his birthday today, and he shouldn’t be punished simply because he won’t put a baby in you. ”
“You want me to gift your body parts to the other boys? How about your balls served up in an old teal Tiffany box? A promise that you, at least, will never bear offspring.” Scarlett slithers onto the floor, taking a seat next to Ash.
With another beleaguered sigh, I flop down in the chair across from the couch and rest my fingers over the strings.
I’ve written things over the years. Songs. Poems. Short stories. I only ever present them to the people in this room, and that’s it. That’s enough. I don’t want anyone else to hear them.
“I call this one Ikejime,” I begin, and it’s clear that only Ash and Alexei understand the meaning. “And I want to dedicate it to Jonas.”
“Ikejime is a method of killing fish in a way that makes the meat taste better.” Alexei explains for Scarlett and Bohnes, sipping his coffee and crossing his legs casually at the knee. “The kidney spoils quickly and tastes awful, so it’s removed during the gutting process.”
Nobody speaks after that, giving me the space to perform.
Yeah, that was a good present. I did good, didn’t I?
If the look on Ash’s face is anything to go by, I fucking nailed it.