Chapter 8 #3
This girl. This fucking girl.
There was no deal with my mother. No con.
She was just as naive and innocent and fucking good as she appeared to be.
My God, my mother would strip her for parts without breaking a sweat. But that wasn’t even the worst of it.
The worst of it was me.
What the fuck had I just been thinking? I’d almost been overwhelmed with an urge to kill the man who’d made her look sad. To protect her. To avenge her.
It was irrational. It wasn’t smart. And I could say with absolute confidence that in all my twenty-eight years of life, I had never felt anything like that because of a woman.
I really didn’t want to start now. Not with her.
I had to give it to Mother. Whether or not she’d meant to do it, she had somehow picked the exact right woman to force into my life. Someone who made me a little fucking crazy. Someone who pried at my grip on myself just enough to make me want to let go.
The thought of abandoning myself in her was tempting.
So goddamn tempting that I had to clench my teeth and shove it down as far as it would go.
A man like me didn’t get to lose himself in a woman like her and stay sharp.
If I let her get any closer, I was going to become a dull knife.
Useless to everyone.
Dangerous to no one but myself. And her.
“I don’t.” My voice came out rougher and angrier than I intended.
Her eyes ricocheted to mine. “What?”
“I don’t have faith in you.” The words tasted like poison as I forced them past my lips, which only reinforced that I needed to get through this. “That woman was a test. You failed.”
A crease formed between her brows. “A test?”
“She works for me. She was supposed to steal your phone, and you just handed it to her.”
The crease deepened. “Why would you do that?”
“After I found out you lied to me about your reason for leaving your job, I wanted to be sure you weren’t lying to me about anything else.”
Indignation flashed in her gaze. “I’m not.”
“Actually, you were.” I leaned forward, bringing myself within only a few inches of her. “You were hiding the full extent of your naivete.”
I paused, letting the words land, waiting to see their effect begin to take shape in her emerald gaze.
“It’s a fucking liability. I’m going to be don one day. Do you think a don’s wife can afford to be this gullible?”
She flinched as if I’d hit her.
“Cosimo—”
“No. Answer my question. Do you think a don’s wife can afford to be this gullible?”
Her bottom lip wavered.
The light behind her eyes—that stubborn, infuriating light I’d never managed to affect with my cruel barbs before—flickered.
Then dimmed.
There it was.
I was close. So close. I just needed to keep going.
And so I did, despite the guilt twisting through my gut, despite the shame wrapping its cold hands around my throat.
“It’s not too late to admit it to yourself, Fabiana. You can’t do this. You aren’t made for this world. Tell your brother that and ask him to call off the wedding.”
Her lips parted on a harsh inhale.
“Your brother and my father made the wrong choice. Help me save them from the consequences of that poor decision.”
A single tear slipped down her cheek. She swept it away before it reached her jaw, but I saw it. And I’d remember it.
“Cosimo, I can’t.”
“Yes, you can,” I ground out. I was only half aware of the fact that I was being way too fucking upfront with her, that at some point I’d abandoned my plan to do this subtly. But I was too far gone now. I just needed this to end.
“It’s not a question of whether or not you’ll disappoint your brother, Fabiana.
It’s only a question of when. If you marry me, you’re going to make a mistake somewhere along the way, just the way you did at work.
Just the way you did now. You’ll trust the wrong person.
You won’t think about the consequences. Only by that time, it won’t be just your coworker’s job at stake. It’ll be people’s lives.”
Her shoulders shook. I’d taken a knife, slid it into her, and twisted it.
For a moment, there was only silence between us. It hung like some dead, ugly thing amid the cheerful chatter and buzz around us.
Slowly, so very slowly, her gaze lifted to mine.
“You’re an asshole.” She grabbed the napkin from her lap, dabbed angrily beneath her eyes, tossed it back down on the table, and stood, slinging her purse over her arm.
“I’m done. You’re completely right. I can’t marry you.
I’d be insane to tie myself to someone as distrustful, cynical, and mean as you. ”
Her lips pursed, and she looked down at me like I was a goddamn cockroach.
“Rafe and Cleo left for a vacation this morning. I will not ruin their trip for your sake. But I will talk to my brother once they return. I will beg Rafe to let me out of this if I have to.”
I sat back and cracked my neck. “Good.”
Her eyes blazed with fire. “Say a prayer for me, would you?”
I waited for the rush of triumph to hit me, but there was no satisfaction at having gotten what I wanted.
Only a nauseating, hollow pit in my stomach as I watched her turn and walk out the door.