8. Gabe
8
GABE
It’s like heaven and hell, all wrapped into one. Heaven because I have Chrissy in my arms. She was able to sleep through the night, and any time I tried to move away, she held me tighter. It is hell because my cock is hard, and I can’t do anything about it. I want to push her to her back and slide into her, but I don’t have that right. Hell, she’d probably freak out if I even tried it.
Chrissy is sprawled on my chest, and as she lifts her leg higher, her thigh grazes against my hard manhood, and there’s no holding in the groan that erupts from me. I know the minute she wakes up and realizes what’s happening by the way she tenses against me. I gently untangle myself from her and move to the edge of the bed, head in my hands. “Sorry,” I mutter.
The bed shakes as she sits up behind me. “There’s nothing to be sorry for. It’s a natural reaction for a man to wake up with nocturnal penile tumescence, also called morning wood.”
I groan again. There’s no way I can sit here and listen to her talk about my erection, even if she’s talking about it in a medical way. “Just give me a minute, huh?”
She gets out of the bed, and the sight of her walking away with her tight booty shorts just makes me harder. I force my gaze to the wall in front of me and try to think about the most unsexy things I can think of. Fuck, this is embarrassing. She’s Chrissy, for fuck’s sake. I shouldn’t be reacting this way to her.
When I’m finally going flaccid, she comes out of the bathroom and has changed into another pair of shorts and a tank top. She’s without a bra, and her nipples are pressed against the tight shirt. Fucking kill me now.
I grunt as she passes by. “I’m going to start breakfast. Take your time.”
I swear I hear her giggle as she walks down the hallway .
When I seem to have calmed down, I get up and make my way over to the chair where my clothes are. I grab them and get dressed before going into the bathroom. There’s two toothbrushes in the holder, and for just a second, I panic, but then I remember that it’s the same toothbrush I used the last time I was here. I get cleaned up and then make my way out to the kitchen.
“I’m hoping that was my toothbrush in there because I used it.”
“Yep, it’s yours. Whose else would it be?”
All I do is nod because it feels good knowing that there isn’t some other guy spending the night here. I lean against the counter. “How you doing?”
I watch as she pours black coffee into a mug and hands it to me. “Here you go. Just like you like it.”
I take the mug from her hands. “I’m supposed to be taking care of you, not the other way around.”
She shrugs and turns back to the stove. “You took care of me last night. The least I can do is feed you.”
She turns off the stove and dumps the eggs in a bowl and sets them on the island. The toast pops up, and she sets them on a plate and butters them before sitting them next to the eggs. “Have a seat. ”
“What can I do?”
She laughs and points to the stool. “Have a seat.”
I listen to what she says and sit down. This is how she is. She enjoys taking care of people, and I’m not going to fight her on it. I serve food onto the two plates and then pat the seat next to me. As she sits down, I pour from the orange juice carafe into our glasses. “This is perfect, honey.”
“I didn’t have any bacon.”
I shrug. “I don’t need bacon. This is perfect. I usually eat a granola bar for breakfast.”
She gasps. “You eat one granola bar?”
“Okay, maybe two… or three.”
“Gabe, you have to eat more than that. You can’t do your job and just eat a granola bar.”
I know she’s going to keep on, so I grab her hand and thread our fingers together and then hold her hand on my leg. “I’m fine, don’t worry about me. Now eat.”
She’s smiling up at me. “I need my hand back to eat.”
Reluctantly, I release her, and she picks up her fork. We’re both silent; she’s probably thinking about her day, and I’m thinking about her .
She breaks the silence. “I don’t think I’m cut out for working in the ER.”
I take a drink of the coffee and then spin my seat so I’m looking at her. “First of all, you’re cut out for anything you want to do. You’re the best at your job. You remain calm and do what needs done. And I know you don’t want to hear it, but I’ve thought about it all night. That woman wanted to be with her husband, and it was her time to go. Neither you nor the doctors could do anything to help her, but you know what? I bet after your talk with her, she felt at peace. She had someone tell her they cared about her. That made a difference to her, Chrissy.”
She creases her forehead. “So you don’t think I should change jobs?”
I brush the hair that has come out of her ponytail off her face and tuck it behind her ear. “I think you should wait a few days to make any decisions about your future. I know you love your job, but I also know you’re thinking about having a family and kids, and maybe a job where you’re not on call and working crazy hours would be a good move, but you should think about it, honey. Don’t do it because of what happened yesterday. ”
She juts her chin at me. “I’ve been thinking about it for awhile.”
I chuckle. “Oh, I know you have. And I’m sure you have a pros and cons list, highlighted and color coded. You know that whatever you want to do, I support you one hundred percent. You need to do what makes you happy.”
That seems to satisfy her because her face softens, and she smiles at me. “Being a nurse makes me happy, but I feel like I need a change.”
I nod. “I get it. I understand.”
She keeps looking at me, and because I’m drawn to her, I’m practically inches from her face. I lean back, grab my empty plate, and go over to the sink. “You done?”
She grabs her piece of toast. “Yep.”
I take her plate and start to load the dishwasher.
“How come you haven’t been dating anyone?”
I heard the question, but I act like I didn’t. I never lie to Chrissy, and that’s a hard question to answer without telling her the truth. I mean, what am I supposed to say? Because I love you and I don’t want to date any woman but you ? I can’t say that to her.
“Gabe, you ignoring me? How come you haven’t been dating anyone?”
“I date. ”
She laughs as she comes around the island and stops next to me. “Right. Well, you haven’t dated anyone in three years.” She grabs the pan off the stove and stops next to me. “I mean, unless you’re dating and you just haven’t told me about it.”
I resist rolling my eyes. Hell, she knows everything about me. She probably knows me better than I know myself. “No, I haven’t been dating and not telling you.”
She puts the pan in the dishwasher, grabs our juice glasses, and hands me mine. “Want to finish that?”
I chug the orange juice and then put the glass in the dishwasher.
She’s wiping down the counter, and I’m hopeful that we’re done talking about my lack of dating, but I should have known that Chrissy wouldn’t just let it go. “So why aren’t you dating?”
I shrug. “You want the truth?” Or half the truth anyway, because I can’t tell her everything.
She nods her head, and I lean against the counter. “None of the women I’ve dated are okay with our relationship.”
She gasps and pokes her thumb against her chest. “Me? Our relationship?”
“Yes, our relationship. ”
She puts a hand on her shapely hip. “But why? I don’t understand. Your girlfriends have a problem with me?”
I stand up and put my arms across my chest. “First of all, they weren’t my girlfriends. Second of all, I tell any woman that I’ve dated that you come first. Some of them say it’s okay, but as soon as they indicate they’re not okay with it—and their true colors always come out—well, I break it off.”
She’s still pointing at herself. “Because of me?”
I just look at her. How can she not have a clue how I feel about her?
She stomps her foot. “Well, that’s not right. I don’t want to stand in your way of finding…” She starts choking and then clears her throat. “A girlfriend. I want you to be happy, Gabe. I can’t believe you’ve never told me this before. Oh my God, this is all my fault.” She starts pacing the kitchen and stops. “Alison. You were dating Alison, and I called you when Otis died and you came and spent the weekend with me.”
“Honey, your dog died. Of course I was going to stay with you.”
She gasps and puts her hand over her mouth. “Oh my God, I was the reason you broke up with her? ”
I hold my hands up when I see her getting visibly upset. “None of this is your fault, Chrissy. I let them know upfront, and if they can’t handle it, that’s on them.”
“Oh my God, I’m so stupid. That was three years ago… that was the last girl you dated… and it’s all because of me.”
“Stop. Trust me, it’s no big deal.” I mean it’s really not. But I can’t tell her why I don’t care.
She walks toward me. “What are you doing Friday night?”
“Nothing. Why? What’s up?”
“We’re going on a date… a double date.”
For just a second, I let myself get excited until I fully process what she just said. “Wait, what did you just say?”
“A double date. Bethany has been begging me to fix you up with her. Can you find me a date?”
I shake my head and walk to the door to start sliding on my shoes. “No.”
There’s hurt in her voice. “You can’t find me a date?”
I squat down and tie my boots on. “What? Yes, of course, I can find you a date, but we’re not going on a double date. That’s ridiculous. Forget it.”
She walks over to me, and I rise to my feet. She grabs both my hands and holds them in hers. She knows I never want to tell her no, and with her touching me, it’s going to be impossible.
“Do this for me.”
“Chrissy, please, I don’t want to go on a double date.”
She steps toward me, and she’s so close she has to lean her head back to look up at me. “Please, I can’t believe that I’m the reason you haven’t been dating. We can go and have fun. You like Bethany, you guys always laugh and have a good time together when you come see me.”
“I really don’t want to.”
“Please? I feel so stupid that I never put two and two together with what happened with you and Alison. I never want to interfere with your happiness, and—”
I swear she’s starting to tear up, and there’s no way I can handle her crying again. “Okay, okay, fine. I’ll go, but just remember I didn’t want to do this.”
She’s not listening, though. She lets out a squeal and does a little jump, and I watch as her breasts jiggle and then I’m completely fuckin’ lost after all that. She throws her arms around my waist. “Thank you, Gabe. We’re going to have so much fun. What do you say? Seven o’clock at the Whistler?”
I nod, knowing I need to get out of here before I confess everything, throw her over my shoulder, and take her back to bed. “Yes. Sounds good.”
“Who are you fixing me up with?”
I growl. I fuckin’ growl because fixing Chrissy up with someone is the last fucking thing I want to do. I’d rather jump in front of a bus. Walk on hot coals. Fight a forest fire. Hell, fucking anything would be easier than fixing Chrissy up with some guy. “I dunno. I’ll figure it out.”
She nods happily, and I give her a hug. “I gotta go. See you. Call if you need anything, okay?”
She assures me she will and then I’m walking out the door to my truck, thinking the whole way that I’m crazy and there’s no way I’m going to survive being front and center with Chrissy on a date with another man. Fuck me, shit is getting real.