14. Gabe
14
GABE
As soon as I walk into the bathroom, I close the door and bang my head against it. I’m going on no sleep, exhaustion, grief, and desire. It’s a hard mix of emotions to deal with, but I know I can’t succumb to them all now.
I turn the water on, but it doesn’t heat up. The hot water tank must be empty, which could be a good thing because a cold shower is what I need right now. I step under the spray of the ice cold water and let it run down my body. I close my eyes, and I’m thinking of Chrissy’s naked curves. I shouldn’t be thinking about her, and guilt weighs heavily on my chest. I get cleaned up, not wanting to be away from her long. I’ve never seen her hit this hard, and I don’t want to be away from her .
I wash quickly, get dried off, and pull on the clean underwear, and then before I open the bathroom door, I try to get myself together. I can do this. She needs me right now, and I can put my needs to the side.
Determined, I walk out of the bathroom and go over to the bed, pull back the covers, and lie down. Chrissy turns to face me, and I wait to see if she wants to be held or not. When she doesn’t move any closer, I try not to be disappointed. “You doing okay, Chrissy? I know that’s a stupid question but—”
She is resting her head on her hands. “It’s not stupid. I’m okay, I guess. I feel numb, if that makes sense.”
“Yeah, honey. It does.”
She scoots toward me, but she doesn’t reach for me and stops before we touch. “Gabe, can I ask you something?”
I turn to my side to look at her. The only light in the room is coming from the moon through the window, and I see her looking at me. “Yeah, you know you can ask me anything.”
She opens her mouth and then closes it. “Forget it. ”
I reach over and tap a finger on her chin before drawing my hand back. “Tell me. What are you thinking about?”
Her eyes widen, and her voice is strained and nervous. “Have you… I mean, have you ever thought about us getting together?”
My heart literally starts to slam in my chest. “What do you mean, getting together?”
She shrugs. “You know… have you ever thought about having sex with me?”
Fuck. How do I even answer that? She’s been through so much, and she’s talking out of her head. I can’t take advantage of this situation. She must see the conflict on my face because she continues. “You’ve never lied to me before, please don’t lie to me now.”
I take in a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I think about it every damn day.”
She lifts her head up, and there’s no hiding the surprise on her face. “Really? You’ve thought about me like that?”
I’m probably going to regret this later or tomorrow. “Yeah, I have. How could I not?”
She leans up and moves toward me, and I have to put my hands out to stop her. “Honey, not like this. You’ve been through so much these last few days and—”
She looks at me, and as if she’s made a decision, she uncovers her body. I watch as she pulls her panties off first and then her T-shirt. When she’s completely naked, she presses her body to mine, and I let out a guttural groan.
She is resting her head on my chest, drawing patterns on my abdomen with her fingers. “Hear me out. I need this, Gabe. We both do.”
“Yeah, but—”
“You’re always trying to protect me, but you don’t need to protect me from this. I want to feel close to you. I want to be with you.”
I tilt her chin up so she’s looking at me. “Chrissy, we are close. Hell, I’m closer to you than I’ve ever been to anyone in my life, and I can’t let you do this and then regret it in the morning. That’s not how this works.”
“Do you want me, Gabe?”
Fuck, there’s so many things I’m thinking right now. I can’t lose my best friend. I should tell her no just to buy us some time until we can talk about this, but I can’t bring myself to lie to her. “Yeah, I want you. I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my life. ”
She blinks up at me with her big eyes. “Kiss me.”
And because I’ve wanted this for so long, I don’t hesitate. I press my lips to hers. I intend to go slowly, but as soon as our lips touch, I lose control. It’s like I’ve wanted this for so long that I’m letting all my pent-up desires take over. She slides her tongue with mine, and I groan. We kiss until we’re both breathless and I pull away, panting. I push her to her back and hover over her. Her eyes are wide, her lips swollen, and there’s no doubt she wants this, but I need to hear her say it. “Are you sure about this, Chrissy?”
She widens her legs and lifts her hips to meet mine. My hard manhood, which is still covered by my underwear, presses between her legs, and she groans. “I’m sure. I’m really sure.”
I kiss her again and then kiss, nip, and lick down her throat. She moans as I suckle her breasts, laving one with attention before moving to the other. As I suckle her, she lifts her hips, seeking the friction that she needs.
I kiss down her belly, and she sucks in a breath. “Gabe.”
I’m lying between her legs, my mouth almost to her mound, and I’m practically salivating. “Do you trust me?”
"Yes!" is her immediate reply.
I nuzzle the soft curls at the apex of her thighs, and she whimpers. I press my tongue to her core and slide it along her wet heat. Her legs tighten around my head, but I don’t stop. She’s so wet and responsive, there’s no way I can stop now. I press my thumb to her swollen clit, circling it until she’s panting, begging me for a release.
Her fingers dig into my head as she holds me to her. I fuck her with my tongue as I circle her clit. She comes in an instant, saying my name, and the sound of it is the best thing I’ve ever heard. Covered in her arousal, I lick her once more and then sit up, disposing of my underwear. My cock is hard, swollen, and angry. I look at Chrissy, and she looks satisfied, her eyes hooded. I could stop and continue this another day, after we’ve talked. That’s what I should do.
She must realize what I’m thinking because her legs lock around my hips, and she pulls me toward her. Her hands go to my shoulders. “Don’t even think of stopping now, Gabriel Gray.”
“Are you sure?” I ask her again.
She nods, and I position myself at her core. I slowly enter her, giving her time to adjust to me. I look down at where we’re connected, and the jolt of what we’re doing hits me hard in the chest. She may not realize it, but she is mine now. There’s no going back from this. She already has my heart, but I’m not going to stop until she has my ring on her finger.
“Don’t stop,” Chrissy begs of me.
I’m panting from holding back, giving her time. “There’s no stopping now. Fuck, you feel good, baby.”
She’s so tight, and the more I say to her, the tighter she clamps down on me. When I enter her completely, she gasps and tenses. “Breathe, baby. You gotta breathe.”
She exhales a big breath, and I pull back my hips and then plunge back inside her. She throws her head back on the pillow and moans. “Yes!”
I drive into her with complete abandon. She puts her feet on the bed, meeting me thrust for thrust. When she closes her eyes, I lean over her, pushing her knees to her sides. She takes me deeper, and her eyes fly open. “Yes, keep your eyes on me, Chrissy. I want you to look at me while I claim you. I need you looking at me, baby.”
She leans up, putting her hands on my shoulders, and then she kisses me. It’s a smashing of teeth, filled with grunts and sliding of tongues. It’s messy and perfect. When she pulls back, she’s smiling at me, and it takes me close to the edge.
I bring my hand up between us, sliding my finger to her swollen nub. “Can you give me another orgasm? One more. I want to come with you.”
I swear she gets hotter and slicker. I punch my hips, and the instant her orgasm hits, she tenses. I pump my hips as the orgasm takes over my body. I don’t stop until I’ve completely filled her up, painting her insides.
I’m hovering over her, trying to keep my weight off her, and she puts her arms around me and pulls me until I’m lying on top of her. We’re both panting and our bodies are slick, but I could stay just like this forever.
Reluctantly, I lift up.
“Where are you going?”
She can’t think I’m leaving after that. I lean over her and kiss the tip of her nose. “I’m going to get something to clean us up.” She’s looking at me worriedly. “I’ll be right back.”
She nods and releases me.
I pull out of her, get off the bed, and walk into the bathroom. After cleaning myself up, I grab a cloth and soak it under the warm water and then go back to where she’s lying. She has her legs together, and I push her knees apart. She seems surprised. “Gabe!”
I just shake my head at her. “Honey, I don’t think now is the time to be shy.”
When I try again, she lets me push her knees apart. Her pussy is swollen, and I take my time cleaning her up. After tossing the cloth in the hamper, I lie down beside her.
She’s on her side and I’m on mine, but that’s not going to work for me. “I figured you for a cuddler.”
She turns and looks at me. “I wasn’t sure if—”
I hold a hand out to her. “Come over here, baby.”
She scoots over to me, and I help position her until she’s lying halfway on top of me and our legs are wound together.
She lets out a sigh of relief, and I hold her tighter. I know we have a hundred things we need to talk about, but right now, but I want to just lie here and hold her. When her breathing deepens and slows, I know she’s falling asleep. I rest my chin against her head and think about how this could be my life. This right here is what I want, and I’m going to do everything I can to make it happen because being with Chrissy and loving her is one of the best things I’ve ever done. I’m going to do everything I can to be the man she needs.