Chapter 7
Chapter Seven
Zara
M y body felt heavy, but I had no urge to move. I was lying on the bench I’d seen at Midgard but it had been transported to the spacious living room of the safe house. Naked and needy, I knew this was a dream but didn’t care because, in it, Colin and Lincoln were also nude and ready to turn dream into fantasy.
Lincoln gripped my hips as he settled between my legs in a possessive almost brutal way. His length slid against me as he positioned himself at my entrance. Every inch of me ached with a need that had grown into an obsession.
Days of Colin’s words circling in my mind had taken root and I wanted to feel consumed like he promised. With Lincoln poised at my entrance, I wanted to thrust forward, demand more, but I was unable to do more than whimper. He was large, much larger than any man I’d had inside me before. Despite the slickness coating my entrance with arousal, a part of my brain was still able to question, would he even fit?
Colin fisted his equally big cock and slapped my parted lips with his thick length. The distraction made my mind and my skin tingle.
“Open for me, Zara.” His soft command was a trigger to my already overloaded senses. A moan escaped me as my jaw dropped open, inviting him in.
I’d never fantasized about sucking dick before, but knowing I was about to be taken from both ends, excited me. Colin’s cock was worth worshiping with every part of my body. Iron wrapped in silky smoothness would be a treat against my tongue.
I parted my lips, saliva dripping from my mouth as he pushed my jaw wider with the size of his cock. I moaned and tried to reach between my thighs where I knew I was already drenched to push me over the edge but my arms wouldn’t listen to me. Sweat trickled down my back, a reminder of the heat being generated between our bodies.
As Lincoln pulled his hips back then slammed into me, Colin speared my throat. I would have screamed but Colin’s cock absorbed the sound. I gave over all control as the two men claimed me in a way I’d only ever read about. The sounds of slapping skin filled my mind as I closed my eyes and the room seemed to swirl.
“Look at me, Zara.”
The voice’s thick Albanian accent caused a frown to crease my brow. Something wasn’t right. I gazed up thinking to see Colin, but the sexy man of my dreams had been replaced by a nightmare. Mihal, complete with clenched teeth and eyes filled with a ghastly intention, stared down at me.
“Did you really think you could escape me, Zara?”
I woke with a start, a scream frozen in my throat and my pulse racing like a championship thoroughbred. Where was I? Remembering who I was at that moment was hard. It was as if a bass drum were beating inside my ears in time to my heartbeat, and everything seemed both too real and imaginary. Weirdly enough, it was the sensation of sweat evaporating from my skin which finally helped me to focus.
Another night’s sleep destroyed by a nightmare. I punched my pillow in frustration. Of course I wasn’t having a menage with two men who barely spoke to me. I was in a guest room at the safe house being kept safe from a crazy virgin-obsessed mobster. How long could a person remain obsessed? On many levels I wasn’t sure if I was wondering because of Mihal or because of my own fascination with the two untouchable men. I relaxed back in a sweaty heap against the headboard. Ugh!
Three days. It had been three days of way too much chemistry and no action. Of waking up hot, needy and completely unsatisfied. There was only so much a girl could do with her own two hands and I would be damned if I was going to see if my two handsome protectors would get me a sex toy to take the edge off what they were unknowingly doing to me.
If I could have hated Colin or Lincoln, things would have been easier. Unfortunately, no matter how much my mind argued that was the correct response, my emotions wouldn’t follow. I would have thought that would be easy with Lincoln. The man barely talked to me. Thing was, when he did, it was usually funny or something really deep.
Colin pulled at heartstrings I thought I had cut long ago. He worried about not only my physical safety, but tried to make sure I was happy as well. The two of them were like a strange catnip creation that I kept wanting to take a taste of. For years, I was an independent woman who didn’t need anything from anyone, especially nothing from men. Which made the fact that the two of them made me want more from them than a few minutes of distraction extremely frustrating.
Mihal had messed up my life in more ways than he probably imagined. The nightmares were bad but not something I wasn’t used to. Growing up with my parents, I was intimately familiar with betrayal. They’d taught me at a young age not to trust that anyone would act against their own self-interest. A lesson proven right when they’d asked me to, and I’d refused, to lie and take the fall for their last bungled job. They didn’t care that it would have meant possibly being convicted as an adult, and I couldn’t care anymore if they went to jail.
I’d been raised to be a survivor, and until this recent debacle in Albania, had successfully relied on no one but myself. Those skills and that attitude had meant I escaped Mihal and made it back to the U.S. There hadn’t been time to stop and think or wonder if my life might have been easier if I had even a single person to call. Would I have been targeted if I hadn’t been so isolated? Since arriving at this safehouse in the middle of nowhere, there hadn’t been much more for me to do than think about exactly that.
Who would I even be once the threat of Mihal was gone? Did I want to jump right back into the corporate rat race? I’d never suspected that Colin would do more than give me a place to crash for a night. I’d planned on using the small breather to think up my own plan, but surprisingly there had been no talk of me leaving. Honestly, there had been no talk at all about next steps. Not that I’d asked. The luxury of not having to make a single decision had been a temptation I couldn’t resist.
Every choice I’d made since my parents were escorted away in handcuffs had been to do things the “right” way. From using the foster care system to support me until I graduated high school to applying for every grant and scholarship to get me through college. I worked my ass off every day and night to get a little further along the corporate path to success.
Yet after all that, I was on the run from a crazy stalker. The only good thing in my life was a man, who I’d tried to blow off, who was still willing to help. Was it me? Was I bad luck? Was all my misfortune due to the karma from the jobs I’d pulled with my parents as a child? Maybe I had more to make up for than I’d first thought. Or maybe it was all bullshit!
I threw the blanket back and swung my legs out of the comfy bed. I needed to get my mind off things I had no control over, the past, the men who filled my nights with wet dreams, and think of a plan to get myself out of there. After peeing and brushing my teeth, I scanned the selection of clothes in the walk-in closet. A new wardrobe had arrived for me the previous day.
The fact that they’d bought me an entire wardrobe had started an argument I’d lost spectacularly. As I was bickering with Colin about the cost of the clothes and wanting to return everything, Lincoln had silently gone behind our backs and cut the tags off of every item, ending the dispute. I hated owing people, but as I ran my hand over the soft rich fabrics, I also felt grateful. Private security must’ve paid well, because none of the items on the hangers had been purchased from a discount store.
I’d never been someone who was spoiled and hated how good it made me feel. Fuck it! If they wanted to throw away thousands of dollars on clothes, it would be silly of me not to wear them. Besides, some of the outfits they bought would look amazing on me, and I was damned if I was going to be the only sexually frustrated person in the house.
I continued to admire the clothing, looking for the perfect tantalizing outfit to match the drool-enriching effects their figure-hugging khakis and tight-fitting t-shirts had on me. Did they know how much they were affecting me? How much my hands itched to trace the muscles hinted at under their clothes?
I was acting like some sex-starved lunatic. It had to be the mountain air. Or maybe the home -cooked meals Colin spoiled us with. Regardless, my body was constantly protesting my lack of carnal action.
I threw on a stretchy white crop top with no bra. Did I care that my nipples, now in a constant state of alertness, were popping through making me look like one of those fembots in Austin Powers? Nope. I shook my head and laughed. How cool would it be if I could shoot bullets out of my tits?
For the bottoms, I put on a pair of red shorts that showed off my ass which seemed to be Colin’s favorite part of my body; at least I always felt his eyes there whenever I passed him. Lincoln was harder to figure out. He had a darkness swirling inside of him that made me shiver. What dark things would he want to do to me in the bedroom? I sighed. The girl at the club had hinted at their kinky nature, but I had to stop thinking about that before the temptation to throw away my dignity and jump them got too strong.
Not that they’d shown interest. After the kiss the first night, they’d been painfully respectful. The few times I’d tried to flirt or hint that I might be interested in what Colin had teased me with, they’d quickly change the subject.
I could take a hint. No matter how badly it stung my pride. If they weren’t interested, it was time to stop daydreaming and take back control of my life. I slipped into a pair of white Gucci sandals and headed downstairs for some much needed morning java.
The house was quiet. Only the faint sounds of the birds outside trilling their happiness disturbed the stillness. The sun was bright and the sky was a cloudless blue expanse. Maybe I’d finally take a walk around the grounds and check things out.
I found a note at the coffee maker.
Back at 6 pm. Will bring Sushi for dinner. See you then.
Be good,
Colin
So much for trying to make them horny. Lincoln had introduced me to a man named Brody and told me he would be watching me if they had to leave, but a quick look around told me he wasn’t here either. It had to be a good sign that they were willing to leave me alone, right? Colin had given me a phone in case of emergency, though I had to promise not to use it to communicate with anyone else, especially someone from my past life. If they only knew how easy making that promise was. I was not going to let the prospect of being alone all day get me down.
I made myself an amazing cup of coffee with what I referred to as the mini spaceship that guaranteed the best cuppa money could buy. Of course, I knew the value of the machine. Back when the Thomas’ were a thieving band of three, we’d swiped one. We didn’t get to keep it, of course, but sold it to pay back a guy my dad owed money to at the track.
There was something surreal about standing in front of the expensive machine, waiting for my first cup of the day, cozy in a safe house that could be described as a mansion, while my parents rotted away in prison. I had no remorse, no fucks to give. They’d chosen that life and now were paying for it. Unfortunately, I was too, and the path to righteousness was as elusive as ever.
When the brew cycle was finished, I took my steamy cup of perfection outside and headed toward the giant pond. Lincoln spent a lot of time there. I’d seen him several times watching the fish, his eyes glazed like he was seeing but not what was before him. Whenever he got frustrated or started acting unsettled, he’d sneak away for some time alone. Clearly, the man had issues which spending time with the fish must have helped because he’d always return to the house in better spirits.
Maybe those wiggly animals could help me too. I sat on a reclining lounge at the edge and watched them. The fish were mesmerizing, and I wondered how I’d not known this before. The passage of time seemed secondary, almost unnecessary in comparison with the stillness they inspired in me. They appeared connected to whatever that almighty power was that everyone talked about was, it was enviable.
Was this why people liked fishing? Endless hours of floating, under a sky swollen in endless blue allowing yourself to just be while waiting for a bite. Of course, I’d do the catch and release program as I didn’t like eating fish, and wasting life was abhorrent to me. Moments of no stress stretched into hours of peace until my bladder screamed for relief.
I was exiting the bathroom when I heard the security system beeping near the front door. It was them, my 3 am fantasy arriving home with dinner for me. Had this been a different circumstance, I might have dropped to my knees offering blow jobs as they entered the home.
“Damn it,” I muttered. Hours of relaxation and my mind still immediately plunged to the gutter at the mere thought of the two men. My cheeks flushed as I caught sight of them and they eyed me speculatively. Had they heard me?
“Dinner.” Lincoln held the bag aloft as if that explained everything. The truth was far from it. Just seeing them turned my nipples to tight peaks, and I knew they saw it, but neither of them said a thing.
I blew a stray strand of hair out of my face with exaggerated emphasis. “I’ll get the plates,” I mumbled and hurried off to the kitchen. They followed me and washed their hands at the sink. I couldn’t help but notice how they moved in sync like they'd done this very thing a thousand times before.
Five minutes of uncomfortable silence was all it took before I couldn’t stand it anymore. “I think it's time for me to go home.” That wasn’t what I’d planned to say or even what I really thought, but staying in this constant state of awkwardness couldn’t be healthy.
My words must have surprised them because both their eyes snapped from their plates to my face. While Lincoln remained stoically blank, Colin’s gaze turned dark, like something I’d said offended him.
“What?” I crossed my arms across my chest defensively. “I can’t hide forever and you guys can’t be happy with having to babysit me. I think it’s time.” The last bit wasn’t as strong as I wanted, but it didn’t change the truth of the words.
Colin looked hurt. “It’s only been a few days, Zara. We want to keep you safe. What’s the rush?”
I glared at Colin. Why was he making this harder? Shouldn’t he want to be done with the burden that was me? I looked over at Lincoln to try and get support.
“I’m not your responsibility. Besides, maybe I was overreacting. Mihal’s probably already got someone new to focus on. I need to go home, get my stuff out of storage, find a new apartment and job, and start living again.”
“Your storage unit was broken into and ransacked. From what we know, there are teams of men searching for you still. Until we can figure out how to get Mihal to back down, you're going to be in danger.”
Lincoln’s response had been so matter-of-fact, it took a minute for the words to sink in. Something inside of me snapped. The chair I’d been sitting on toppled backward when I rose aggressively to my feet.
“How long have you known this?” My jaw hurt from how tightly it was clenched.
Colin rose as if he was going to comfort me but wisely didn’t come closer. “We found out yesterday. Part of the reason we weren’t here was we had to meet with some people to get more information on the situation.”
Mihal was really still looking for me? My mind raced and my emotions swirled like a rollercoaster between anger and fear. “And you didn’t tell me why?”
“Because until we knew more, there was no point in worrying you.”
“I don’t give a shit if the entire Albanian army is here. You had no right to keep information about my life from me.” I shouted at the two men. They both looked too calm and collected and it made me even angrier as I stood on the edge of a massive breakdown. Did they even care about me or was I just a job?
“We were going to tell you after dinner.” Colin tried to placate me, and even though I believed him, it just made things more confusing.
“I’m done. I can’t do this.” Neither of them moved to restrain me as I barged out of the room and ran for the stairs.
By the time I reached my room, I was panting and my heart was racing. I couldn’t stay here and be some sort of pity case, but I didn’t know where else I could go. I’d figure something out. I always did. I needed to get my stuff then I would find a way to get away. Before I could slam the door shut and lock it, they appeared on the threshold. Lincoln held his hand against the wood and stopped me, his eyes narrowed in frustration.
“Get out!” I hurried to my closet but for what? There was nothing here that was really mine. I grabbed my purse and whirled around. “You know what, never mind.”
My attempt to push by them failed when Colin’s hand shot out and firmly gripped my upper arm.
“You’re not going anywhere, Zara, you are staying with us.” Colin’s grip on my arm was firm, but not painful.
“Why?” My throat was tight with so many emotions. “Why do you care? It’s not your job to take care of me. It’s obvious both of you don’t even like me. I’ll go and then you’ll be free. You won’t have to worry about me anymore.”
“Don’t like you?” Lincoln’s voice held a hurt kind of surprise.
“I’m not an idiot. I can take a hint. Whenever I flirt with either of you, you practically run away. It’s noble, really, that you are willing to protect me, but I’m no one’s pity project. I can take care of myself.”
Not that I had any clue how I was going to do that. Rejection, fear, and days of frustration weren’t the best recipe for good decisions, but the only thing I really knew in that moment was things couldn’t continue the way they’d been. A girl had to have some pride.
Colin’s hand cupped my cheek in a gesture that calmed my soul almost as much as it hurt my heart. “Do you not see how much we like you, want you?”
“Bullshit.” I glared up at him, tears stinging my eyes. I wanted to believe him but couldn’t risk it. It was too easy to lie with words and their actions had spoken clearly.
Lincoln pulled me away and tugged me to his chest. His embrace shocked me and for a minute, I struggled against him. He didn’t let me flee, taking each blow of my fists against his broad chest as he ran his hands over my back soothingly. Fear faded away and my heart rate slowed. Eventually, I rested my forehead against his shoulder, allowing his embrace to act as a balm to all my wounded places.
“You’re not in a good place, Zara.” His voice was a rumble against my ear. “We’re holding back because we care about you, and the last thing Colin or I want is to be those guys who take advantage of a situation.”
God save me from overprotective men. Why did they always think they knew what a woman needed without asking? Okay, I had to admit his words made sense, but I knew what I wanted, and in that moment, it was them.
“Are you saying that you’ve been avoiding me because you thought I wasn’t ready? Not because you don’t want me?” The hope in my voice was embarrassing, but I didn’t care.
“Yes.”
“Both of you want me.” I looked at Colin to make sure he was on the same page.
He took a deep breath then looked at me with a hunger that warmed places deep in my core. “Yes, Zara. We both want you. But if we acted on it, we’d be taking advantage of you.”
“No. This situation is fucked up. Hell, my whole life has been a series of screwed up situations, but I’m a grown woman. I want you both and I need you now.” If for nothing else but to get my mind off the shitshow that was my existence. That wouldn’t be a good argument, but I needed something to remind me I was alive.
“I don’t know.” I could see in Colin’s eyes that he was wavering, so I pushed.
“I’m not asking for forever. Please help me forget all the bad and remind me of the good.” I pulled my head from Lincoln’s shoulder and gave him a pleading look before turning my head and my gaze landed on Colin. “Please.”
It was the moment of no return. If they turned me away, I would have to go. The two men had a silent communication, before Linc stepped back and took me by the hand.
“We can do that.”