Chapter 15
15
Gage
Leah doesn’t wake up until very late the next morning. Dmitri and I take turns sitting in bed next to her so we can make sure she doesn’t wake up alone.
Miraculously, she only needed stitches in her arm. Everything else checked out. The doctor, with a variety of instruments and tests, determined Leah is going to be okay. Although she’ll be very, very sore for a while.
She wakes while Dmitri is out. His pacing was driving me to thoughts of violence, so I suggested he grab some food and drinks from a nearby coffee shop.
“Gage.” Leah’s eyes flutter open and she smiles briefly before grimacing in pain. “Ow.”
“Yeah. You’re all bruised up, little girl. Dmitri went out for food. As soon as you eat, you can have some more pain meds. The doc said to take them with food.”
“Okay. Dmitri’s coming back?”
I nod and squeeze her hand, one of the few parts of her that doesn’t look like it hurts.
“Can you help me sit up?”
“Sure thing.” I support her neck as best I can. The bruise from her seatbelt is ugly and purple, stark against her skin.
“It’s bad, isn’t it?” She brushes her fingertips against the side of my mouth. “You’re frowning and looking at my neck. Is it that bad?”
“I don’t like seeing you hurt. But you’re beautiful even with bruises. You’re beautiful no matter what, Leah.”
She closes her eyes. “It hurts you to look at me.”
“Only because I wasn’t there to prevent this. I should’ve—” I break off, unable to finish the sentence. A deep breath. I swallow past the choking regret. “I should’ve been there for you. And I wasn’t.”
She blinks those amazing blue eyes at me, sympathy shining through them. “You couldn’t have known. Nobody could.”
“Billings did. He tried to tell me. I ignored him.” Because of my issues. My baggage. My trauma. It sounds like a collection of flimsy excuses.
Leah’s stern look reminds me of a prissy schoolteacher. “Did he specifically say Vanessa was coming after you?”
“No. But?—”
The front door slams shut. “Shit. Sorry,” Dmitri mutters.
“I’m awake,” Leah calls.
The sound of a crinkling paper bag precedes him as he comes down the hall. He’s carrying a to-go drink tray, as well. His face relaxes into a smile when he sees Leah sitting up. “How are you doing, baby?”
“I feel great. We should go for a run. Do some weight-lifting. Maybe join a kickboxing class.” She winks. “Then after lunch, a triathlon.”
“Brat,” he says fondly. “Be real. How are you feeling?”
“Everything hurts.”
I get a glass of water and a pain pill for her. Dmitri takes a poppyseed muffin from the bag and puts it on a napkin in her lap.
“Wow, what service,” Leah jokes before taking a massive bite of muffin. “Now can I have drugs?”
“Yes.” I hand her the pill and water glass.
Dmitri and I sit on either side of her on the bed, eating our own breakfasts and drinking coffee. Other than the bruised and banged-up state of our girlfriend, this moment feels restful. The juxtaposition of peace with Leah’s bruises on display makes the moment feel more ephemeral, and therefore, more precious.
Clearing my throat, I set down my coffee and the remnants of my muffin. “You both might have questions. About some of the things Vanessa said. And about why I was ignoring you for days.”
“I do.” Leah turns toward me and winces. “But only if you’re ready to share them. She said something about an orgy scene, which sounds bananas, but maybe it isn’t. You can tell me anything, but if you don’t want to…” She trails off and gives me a brief grin. “I’m talking too much.”
“Not at all.” I steel myself. The only person I’ve spoken with about these things is my therapist, and even then, the discussion was broad strokes. I’m ready to get specific, if that’s what Leah needs. “My first season filming Academy of Ghosts was incredible. Claudia, Jess, Todd, Nic, Javi, and me—we brought fresh blood into Season Three, and fans were rabid for more. But four of us were underage. I was fourteen when we filmed that season.”
“Pretty risqué stuff they had you do, as a fourteen-year-old,” Leah murmurs.
Dmitri is silent, but I can feel his support along with Leah’s.
“It was,” I agree. “But it wasn’t pushing the boundaries of ethics until we filmed Season Five. I was sixteen, so was Jess. Claudia and Nic were seventeen. Only Todd and Javi were technically adults at eighteen, but they were still teenagers. Billings had this idea for a scene. The characters were going to mishandle a love potion, and the result was going to be, like Vanessa said, an orgy. We were practically naked for the scene. Have you heard of a cock sock?”
Leah looks like she wants to giggle, and Dmitri says, “What the fuck?”
I nod and chuckle. “It’s what it sounds like. A pouch for the male genitalia. They’re worn in sex scenes to keep things from getting too improper.”
Leah and Dmitri nod.
“But there’s nothing proper about wearing one. And Billings put a bunch of horny teenagers, new to the film industry, in almost no clothing. Then he told us to go at it. He even left out some alcohol and turned a blind eye when we helped ourselves. I won’t lie—it was fun in the moment. Not at all traumatizing. Jess was uncomfortable afterward, and her discomfort made the rest of us realize it hadn’t been right. She told her parents. Those of us who had professional managers got their managers involved. My parents were my managers, and they didn’t care. They just wanted to get paid.”
“Fuck them,” Dmitri says quietly.
“It’s why I don’t have contact with my parents.” I shrug. That pain is old, and so far in the past, it doesn’t touch me anymore. “The other managers brought up Billings’s actions to our studio’s union. That union isn’t the big one that protects everybody, but the case was salacious enough to garner the media’s attention. It wasn’t a good look for Billings. He left abruptly, amid all kinds of pedophilia rumors. The writers had to scramble to resolve Season Five, and they killed off all our characters except Nic’s and Javi’s.”
“Wow.” Leah squeezes my hand. “Did you want to quit?”
“That’s the worst part—at the time, I didn’t want my character killed off. AoG was my home, and the other actors, the support crew—they were my family. I begged to stay on. But once I was away from it, I realized how toxic it had been, how unhappy I was. Still, I remained friends with the Shinies and continued to live in Hollywood. I petitioned for early emancipation so my parents would no longer be allowed to siphon away my earnings.”
Leah and Dmitri soak in my words. They don’t make it about themselves—not that I really worried they would, but it had been my parents’ reaction when everything came to light.
“Anyway, that’s mostly it.” I take a deep, calming breath. “You know pieces of the rest. The following years were fun, but dangerous. Drug use was rampant. I didn’t use, but Nic experimented a lot. She and I got into the underground sex club scenes. That’s where the tape came from. I didn’t know she was filming it.”
“I still think she released it.” Leah’s eyes flash with anger.
“Probably.” I shrug again, but I feel at peace with the lack of resolution. “Javi could’ve done it—he hated me because I was with Nic first. It didn’t matter to him that she cheated and chose him in the end. We’ll never really know who leaked the video, and that’s probably best. They’re both gone. I’m not angry anymore.”
“And what was up with Vanessa Billings?” Dmitri asks.
“I had no idea she was so invested.” I tap the edge of my empty coffee cup. “I can see why Billings’s disgrace was hard on her. After all, she was around our age. I vaguely remember her hanging around the set. If she had aspirations to be an actor, her father’s quick exit from the industry would’ve been devastating.”
Leah gives me a thoughtful look. “I can get why that would be devastating, but at the same time, she really…”
“Lost her mind,” Dmitri finishes.
We’re all quiet for a moment.
I break the silence. “Do you have any other questions for me?”
Dmitri shakes his head. Leah says, “No. Thank you for telling us all of this.”
“You’re welcome. It was far overdue. I know that my past trauma has impacted both of you in negative ways. I’m working on it with a therapist, and will continue to do so until she tells me otherwise. I hope, though—I hope the three of us can keep doing this. Sleeping in a big bed together, Dmitri and me loving you, Leah. All three of us supporting each other.”
“I want that.” Leah starts to nod, then winces.
“No more nodding, baby.” Dmitri takes her hand. “Have the pain meds kicked in yet?”
“Mostly. But back to sleeping in a big bed together—does that mean you’re moving in with us, Dmitri?”
His smile is wide. “If you’ll have me. Gage already gave the okay. We can find a new place, or stay here. It’s up to you.”
“Here’s good.” She leans back. “Sleepy now.”
Dmitri and I help her lie all the way down. I whisper, “You can rest, sweet girl. We’ll be right here.”
She grins, her eyes closed. “I know. Love you both. Forever.”
“We love you, too,” Dmitri says.
I add, “Forever.”
I’m not tired, but I lie down next to Leah, breathing in her sweetness. Dmitri does the same.
I shared every dark, twisted element of my past. And we’re okay. We’re all going to be okay.
* * *
Gage
The coffee shop is mostly empty at three in the afternoon. It’s been almost a week since the ordeal. Billings asked me to meet him for coffee. I’m here, although I’m not sure why.
He leans forward across the table. He looks tired and old. He’s far too weak to be the villain from my adolescent nightmares. “I’m sorry, Gage. I’m sorry for the scene, all those years ago. And I’m sorry for enabling Vanessa’s revenge.”
“This doesn’t fix anything. The damage has been done.”
“I realize that, but I still have to tell you how sorry I am. I wish you didn’t have to take her to court?—”
I scoff. “It isn’t up to me. It’s up to the district attorney’s office. What she did—it’s beyond what she did to Leah. You know that.”
“I know. I’m sorry. I didn’t know what she was up to.” His eyes dart around the coffee shop like he’s afraid of being spotted by the press. He needn’t fear—their interest in the story died down fairly quickly, buried by a billionaire’s girlfriend’s mental health episode.
Anger simmers in my chest. I keep my voice even so I don’t shout my accusation. “You had to have guessed what she was doing.”
“I should have.” He runs a hand through his goatee. “But I didn’t want to think about it, or guess. I wanted to believe everything was okay with her. I didn’t want to believe my daughter was capable of such things.”
“Several people were hurt because you didn’t want to believe it was possible. Two of those people died.”
“I’ll do everything I can to make it right, even though nothing I do will be enough.”
He’s right about that.
In a faint, regretful voice, he adds, “Vanessa’s been asking to see you. She wants to apologize, too?—”
“No.” I stand up and carefully push in my chair. “I’m not bitter, but I don’t have to forgive her. And I don’t have to see her. If the time comes for me to testify in court, I’ll see her then. Otherwise, she doesn’t get any more space in my life or in my thoughts. Honestly, neither do you.”
Billings gives me a miserable smile. “I understand. Thank you for meeting me today.”
I leave the coffee shop, relieved that our conversation is over. Seeing Billings, hearing his apologies—it’s something I did for my teenaged self. The person I am presently doesn’t need any of that, but my past self finally has closure.
Hours later, I enter the bedroom to find Leah and Dmitri getting ready for bed. Seeing Leah eases any residual stress I’ve been holding since my meeting with Billings. Instantly, I feel better.
Leah looks tired, but happy. Her pain is managed, and yesterday she even went back to work—although she tutored from home over video calls.
Arms folded over my chest, I watch as she puts on a silky little tank top and shorts. She makes a show of rubbing lotion onto her legs and arms. She tousles her hair, sneaking glances at Dmitri and me.
While Dmitri shrugs out of his shirt to get in bed, I stride forward and nuzzle Leah’s neck. “You smell good, little girl.”
“Thanks, Daddy.” She bats her eyelashes and reaches for the waistband of my sweatpants. “Maybe we could…”
I shake my head and gently grab her hand. “Not yet. We talked about this.”
Her pout of irritation and narrowed eyes are cute rather than intimidating. “ You talked. I never agreed.”
Dmitri bites back a smile.
I sigh and explain it again. “We won’t fuck you while you’re under the influence of pain meds, Leah. Besides, they make you drowsy.”
“I’m—ugh!” She throws her hands in the air. “It was my last pill, and I feel fine .”
“Okay.” Dmitri’s voice is placating. “How about we just cuddle at first, okay?”
She grumbles about seducing him during cuddle time. He grins over her head at me.
Three minutes later, she’s sound asleep.