Chapter 15
fifteen
ROSIE
be there or…?
***
LIL’S BOY TOY (GRANT)
The saying goes “be there or be square” baby
LIL <3
Oh.
There are no other options. Just be there.
oh! alright then!
LIL <3
:)
Unsurprisingly, Liliana and Grant are at the board game café before us, even when Locke and I arrive at six fifty-five p.m..
After Lil texted the impromptu group chat with two phone numbers I didn’t recognize, I messaged her on the side. Asking who else is coming, what do I wear, and how am I supposed to navigate a night of Locke with everyone else?
It only dawned on me then that Locke and I, up until this moment, have only really existed together in the space of our apartment. We’ve only been seen outside together by people who don’t truly know us—never with our friends.
Liliana assured me it would be the same as any other hang out. The same as when Grant occasionally third wheels on days with us, or even comparable to a night out with her and I.
She doesn’t understand the situation at hand. She can’t; I haven’t told her what Locke said to me yet.
Things between the two of us haven’t been exceedingly different since that night. He might be sitting a little further from me on the couch, if I was really looking into it. And he might avoid my eye contact more than I’d like, if I was keeping track.
For the most part, though, everything is the same. Tonight might be the same, too, like Liliana said.
When we reach the table where my best friend and her boyfriend are tucked away, Grant stands up, cardigan swaying while he reaches to hug Locke.
They greet each other with fist bumps and claps on the back while Liliana gives me a hug, her pink cable knit dress pressing against the thin cotton of my black long sleeve.
“It feels like it’s been forever.” I mumble into her wavy brown hair.
“I know.” She squeezes me closer, and we only part when the scratches of wood legs on tiled floor overtake our mumbled “I miss you”s.
My best friend sits at the inside end of the table, against the wall, and I settle across from her. Grant to her left, and Locke at my right, with two empty chairs at the end of the table for the last guests of the night.
“Have you guys ever been here before?” Grant asks, while Liliana taps away at the tablet labeled with the café’s green logo.
I answer, “Not this one. There’s another board game café closer to Roxbury I’ve been to, but that one’s more of a bar.”
Up Down, Up Down is less of high-seated chairs and beers on brew and more of board games lining the walls. Boxes of differing colors and shapes surround the room, padding the noises of a family tossing their hands up at a card game, and some high schoolers arguing across a table of Monopoly.
“Grant and I discovered this place over the summer. They have so many games.” She turns the tablet towards Locke and I, and we both lean to get a better look.
I’m hyperaware of how close he is. Lingers of his favorite earl grey tea becoming impossible to ignore.
His navy blue button-down straining against his broad shoulders when he moves.
The knowledge that he’s right there, inches away, so easy to touch if-
“Rosie?” Lil’s staring at me. Her forehead is wrinkled and my nerves stand on edge.
“Sorry, what was that?”
Her eyes thin. Like she knows. “I said, is there a specific game you wanted to play?”
“Oh. No, no. I don’t have anything in mind.”
“Not even Rummikub?”
One corner of her mouth raises, in the faintest turn of a smirk, and I know I slipped.
Rummikub is my favorite tabletop game. A tiled game, that relies heavily on math skills and strategic thinking with numbers. A game so perfectly tailored to me, it’s almost like it exists for me. I take every opportunity to play because I never lose.
And in the moments I’m too preoccupied with how closely Locke is sitting next to me, I forgot it existed.
Liliana leans back in her chair, tilts her head, and glances at the blonde-haired man to my right.
“How’s classes going for everyone?” I blurt out in an attempt to redirect her attention. Liliana loves school. This should be enough to make her think about something, anything, but how I’ve begun drifting towards Locke.
“Classes are whatever for me,” Grant adds in.
My best friend doesn’t take her eye off the small space between me and Locke.
I tell myself to move away and make the gap larger, but my body won’t listen.
“Lily’s doing amazing though. Her professor has as an anthology project she wants to feature her short story in. ”
Lil finally looks away. Breathing gets easier. She’s smiling at her boyfriend, eyes sparkling and too occupied to notice my hand rubbing my collarbone nervously.
Locke clears his throat. “Congratulations, Liliana.”
“Thank you. It’s not finalized yet, though. I don’t want to jinx it by saying too much. Let’s change the subject.”
She waves her hands around. I want to push just so I can shower her in praises, but Liliana’s always been most sensitive about her writing. I respect that.
Before I can shift the discussion to where the rest of our group is, my roommate says, “Tell them about what Dr. Adebayo said to you yesterday, Rosalie.”
My eyes widen. Nerves standing up.
“That’s not anything of interest.”
I awkwardly laugh and rub my neck. Locke turns to look at me, brows creased. “Of course it is. She’s important to you. It’s a big deal that she wants to connect you with other trading firms.”
The green logo hanging nearby starts to fade.
The wooden back of my chair turns soft—identical to the plush cushions of our couch at home.
The walls around us transform into that badly painted coat of off-white, and in my mind, it’s just Locke and I again.
Sharing our closest thoughts and aspirations in the warmth of our home.
The same as last night, when I told him Dr. Adebayo stopped me after class and asked if she could put me in contact with some other trading firms. If it was anyone else, I might’ve taken offense. Being apart of Xion Group was all I’ve ever wanted.
Being in the same circle of connections as Dr. Adebayo is a close second, though. Locke recognizes that without me having to explain it.
My cheeks hurt from smiling so much. I could spend the entire night like this.
Conversations with him were always interesting, but lately, they’ve become special.
There’s an implied depth to them that makes every sentence more intimate than the last. Locke could explain Lego bricks to me, and somehow, he would make it feel special.
“Locke! Can you check your phone?”
Grant’s voice causes the board game café to rematerialize. The green logo is back, the sounds of other people invade my mind, and I’m acutely aware of how close Locke and I have leaned together.
I hope we were whispering. That’s the only way I’ll be able to explain what just happened.
Grant asks Locke about his phone again. Something about not having signal and needing to figure out what’s holding up the last two people. My roommate throws a glance back at me before leaning over the table and talking to his brother.
My heart is still beating rapidly when a fist knocks the table in front of me.
“Rosalie…” Liliana’s voice trails off. She doesn’t use my full name unless she’s trying to emphasize something. I’m caught. It’s the easiest thing I’ve had to decode in days.
Her stare points to Locke, then back to me, then back to him. Silently asking What’s going on?
Truthfully, I haven’t fully figured that out either.
Locke—the cat dad who carefully listens to anything and everything I have to say—is different from anyone I’ve ever met. Even when a portion of my brain tells me to be careful with him and his kind eyes, the tight feeling in my chest makes me rethink.
I’m brainstorming different methods to get Liliana away from the group, so I can awkwardly explain to her there may or may not be something going on with her future brother-in-law, when Grant’s chair loudly scrapes against the wooden floor.
“There you are!” He calls to the guy walking up towards our table, and it’s the first new face.
“My man!” The two of them link hands and clap each other on the back like it’s second-nature, and I see Locke sink into himself.
“Grant’s best friend.” Lil answers my silent question in a hushed voice.
By the time Grant and his friend have done their catching up and fully make their way to us, Locke’s hands are hiding under the table, and blonde strands of hair cover his green eyes.
“Guys, this is my best friend, Derek.” Derek raises a hand when his name is called.
Grant’s best friend is a tiniest bit shorter than him, but with broader shoulders and an equally friendly presence. The brown, curly hair peeking out of his backwards blue cap shakes when he waves his hand and chuckles.
“Hey, everyone. Sorry I’m late. Phone died and then I got caught up looking at the snack bar over there.” He motions behind him, at the counter selling food and drinks near the entrance. “Liliana, good to see you again.”
“You too.” My best friend smiles before motioning over to the two of us, awkwardly sitting at the other side of the table and waiting for our part in the conversation. “This is Rosie, my best friend, and Locke, Grant’s brother.”
“And my roommate.”
I bite the inside of my cheek to stop myself from cringing.
The first thing I say when meeting someone new is, “Locke is my roommate”?
It’s embarrassing at the very least, and the worst type of fuel for Liliana’s theories at the most, but it causes Locke’s posture to change. He glances over at me, smiles in a soft way I think only he can, and sits up straighter.
“Yeah. Nice to meet you.”
Handshakes are exchanged. Liliana points out that Grant and Derek are wearing a matching dark brown. A discussion of where to leave the empty space for the last guest starts right as Locke pushes his chair back.
“Be right back. Just gonna walk around.”