Chapter 16
SIXTEEN
How’d I get here? Quickly and without warning, at that. Hadn’t I had a talk with myself about avoiding forming attachments of any kind?
Particularly ones involving gorgeous females who would leave me all twisted up inside, unable to concentrate on what I came to California to do.
A string in my chest pulled, a strong yank I was useless to resist, towing me in the direction of the woman hiking up her skirt to splash in the incoming tide. Water rushed over her legs, one frothy wave after another.
The sun hung low in the horizon, casting Zoie’s profile in various shades of gold. Round and round she spun, smiling face tipped up to the endlessly blue sky. With each spin, another inch of her skirt got wet. But she paid it no mind, basking in the moment I’d inevitably play on repeat whenever I thought of my time in the States.
Once we arrived at the burger restaurant, we were led to a table outside. Zoie secured Nova’s lead and scooted next to me to point out her favorite burgers on the menu. I’d never seen so many variations of the same dish in my life. Cheeseburgers on steroids, a badass burger, ones topped with barbeque sauce and pork, jalapenos, and onion straws.
When our order came and my eyes watered at the spices, Zoie teased me about needing to get used to more flavorful food. “Not that bland stuff,” she’d added, swinging around her ketchupped fry.
If anyone else had dared to say such a thing, I’d be obligated to defend my mum’s mincemeat pies. Or challenge her to see who could stand more vinegar on their fish and chips.
But compared to Zoie, with her colorful hair, exposed midriff, and laugh filling the air, the rest of the world did seem rather lackluster. She danced around her house in her underwear—like no one was watching, and I shouldn’t have been.
Not that I regretted it for a single moment.
Throughout our dinner she would take bites of food and hum in appreciation, constantly pushing dishes my way to try. As animated as Zoie was, she couldn’t hold a boisterous candle to the puppy at her feet slurping his peanut butter and doggie biscuit sundae with noisy enthusiasm.
When our server came by to drop off the bill, Zoie launched into a conversation about the nice day and the delicious food, and how this was her favorite place to eat. “Please give our compliments to the kitchen staff. It was extra amazing today.”
“I didn’t realize you knew the owners,” I said as we pushed out of the restaurant, and she stared at me as if I were completely daft.
“I don’t,” she said as if it were perfectly normal to speak so intimately with every single person who crossed your path.
But as we made our way back, choosing the sandy shores this time, I learned that was Zoie’s usual behavior. She doled out compliments on hairstyles, bathing suits, and beach setups, meeting other dogs and their owners and instantly relating to them.
Whereas I tended to stand back, hesitate, and plan out most parts of my life, Zoie fucking leapt—headfirst, at that. While it obviously landed her in awkward conversations and messy situations from time to time, she didn’t slow down—didn’t look back. The way she dove in and fully committed was as admirable as it was terrifying.
It might’ve been worth looking into for my social life, but when it came to business, my decisions affected hundreds of people. Thousands when I factored in their spouses and children. I couldn’t afford to be brash.
Not to be outdone, Nova charged the waves, jaw hanging open. Snap went his teeth, as if he could stop the rush of the water’s movement if he managed to get a secure enough grip.
Suddenly, a steady stream of water sprayed my shins, droplets splattering my arms and clinging to the fine hairs. I turned toward the source, my breath catching at the smile Zoie flashed through the strands of pink and blond swirling in the breeze. “You’re thinking too much, I can tell. Stop worrying about whatever it is and let yourself be fully present.”
Walking parallel with the tide, she waded closer. She dropped her skirt and took my hand, towing me in the same direction the moon was tugging the water. “The beach is where you let everything go for a while. Inhale that incredible, salty ocean scent…”
Her raised eyebrows conveyed she was waiting for me to do as instructed. What else could I do but comply? I sucked in a lungful, wondering what she’d do if I told her she was the thing on my mind, and it’d been that way for days.
“See? Doesn’t that feel better?” Using her grip on my hand, she jiggled my arm, loosening it from its firm position at my side. “There you go; you’re starting to get it. The world isn’t behind us?—”
I shifted my weight to my right foot so I could pivot and glance back, and she posted herself in the way. Then she squared me off to the endless stretch of ocean, miles and miles of blue that appeared to meet the setting sun.
“This is all that exists right now. Peace and tranquility. Waves and Mother Nature showing off. A happy puppy.”
We both grinned at Nova as she darted in and out of the water.
“You… Me.” Her throat worked a swallow, chipping the tiniest shard off her casual coolness.
Then the world behind us did disappear. I narrowed my sphere to the visceral details she’d listed. I inhaled deeper, slid an arm around her shoulders, and curled her closer. “Mmm. I like your reality a bit too much for my own good.”
Zoie peered up at me, her pupils dilating as the rotation of the earth snuffed out the last rays of the sunlight. “That statement means you’re still not grounded enough in the here and now. It’s our reality. Respecting and loving ourselves enough to enjoy it is the entire point.”
Whatever floral-scented perfume or shampoo she’d used mixed in with the sea-salt air, and as her chest bumped mine, my heart set its beats to the flutter of hers. “Then mission achieved,” she said, barely above a whisper. “This is what I call pure, unadulterated enjoyment.”
Her pink tongue darted out to wet her lips and fuck it, I was going to kiss her.
A hard object slammed into the back of my calves, while Zoie simultaneously yelped, “Ouch. What the?—?”
Nova’s head tilted with the weight of the giant stick clamped in his teeth. A muffled whimper came out around it, and when he attempted to spin in a circle, Zoie dropped down enough to block the knobby piece of driftwood from bashing our legs again.
I watched the swells of the wave, my pulse picking up speed as water rushed our way. Zoie probably didn’t realize, so I bent and gripped her upper arm.
Which Nova took to mean it was dog pile time. He jumped to greet Zoie, his front paws slamming into her shoulders as the sand beneath my feet whooshed out from beneath me.
Then I was free-falling, tucking and twisting as I shifted my weight away from Zoie.
A high-pitched squeal and a gasp escaped her as the next wave crashed over us. The water spit me out on my side, wet sand clinging to every part of me as I sat up and turned to check on Zoie.
Zoie who now had a white top splattered with brown clumps, wet as she could be. At the cool prickle of the breeze, goosebumps swept across her arms and then I was gaping at the peaks of her nipples.
This isn’t the time. Rolling around in the waves and kissing might look good on film, but the reality is ? —
Our reality. Zoie’s correction rang through my ears, my head, my chest and my soul.
In a lot of ways, I was always living half in the moment and half in the future, which often resulted in missing half of both.
The moment I’d planned to pull her into my arms for a kiss might’ve been interrupted, but laid out on the sand, sopping wet and filthy, a laugh burst out of me. Full-out, no stopping it, no bothering to stifle the volume.
“Are you okay?” Zoie asked, sitting up and shaking out her hands as her laughter joined mine.
I patted myself as though making sure. “I’ll survive. It takes more than a dog, a giant stick, and an aggressive wave to take out Graham Edwards.”
“What a relief.” Zoie crawled closer, her breasts perfectly displayed at this angle, and I forgot how to swallow. “I’d be so sad if I forced you to live in the one moment that was out to get you. But since I don’t want to press our luck, we should probably hop up before the next wave attempts to finish the job.”
She was right, of course, but I resented that standing resulted in her being farther away. Zoie wrestled the stick away from her dog, hiding it behind her back, or trying to anyway. “Let’s find you a stick that’s less dangerous. But later, we’re going to have to have a chat about something called cockblocking.”
I huffed a laugh, returning Zoie’s teasing grin. I told myself it was for the best we’d been interrupted, although my whirring thoughts doth protest too much.
I told myself there’d be other moments.
Although if Nova was anywhere in the vicinity, I’d have to seize them that much faster.