8. Chapter Eight
“We should do this again sometime,” Linda beams as I walk her out. The sad thing is I can’t tell if she’s trying to be polite or actually thinks we hit it off. Maybe Rose is onto something with these “practice” dates.
When the coast is clear, I turn to face Rose and notice the amused look on her face. “Awkward?” she quirks an eyebrow, a hint of a smirk on her lips.
“Like a bull in a China shop,” I confess, feeling better already that I survived round one of Rose’s disaster dates.
“You know, you don’t have to go on any more dates if you don’t think you’re ready.” Her voice is soft, but there’s steel behind it. The kind of strength that holds up a friend when he’s about to stumble.
“Maybe not,” I admit, but something stubborn wells up inside me. “I did promise Gemma I’d try, though. I feel like I owe it to her. Besides, Camille would’ve teased me something fierce for throwing in the towel this early. How did you think it went?”
“Given the circumstances, I’d say you knocked that one out of the park.” Her tone is sincere, but something in her eyes tells me she enjoyed watching me squirm.
“Really? You don’t think it could’ve been any better? I feel like I hardly got a word in edge-wise.”
“Hey now, I didn’t say all that.” She laughs, and her eyes light up. Something about being around her makes everything feel effortless. “I’ll admit, I didn’t know she’d be so… energetic, but you were the perfect gentleman. I picked her for you because she’s been out of the dating scene for so long that I thought you two could relate. I’d have warned you first if I had known she’d be such a nervous talker. Sorry about that.”
“At least I wasn’t the only one who was nervous, then,” I say, remembering Linda mentioning an ex. I had no idea she was new to dating, too. “So, what’s next?” I say, clapping my hands together. “More chaperoned practice dates?”
Rose purses her lips for a moment. “How about we try something different for your next date? Maybe you should go solo. I’m thinking it might be less awkward for you both without me lurking around.”
I twist at the corner of my mustache, then smooth both sides down. She has a point. I’ve always been a man who stands on his own two feet, but sometimes, it’s hard to remember how to do that dance alone.
“You’re probably right,” I say, nodding slowly. “It’s like learning to ride again after a fall. I have to learn how to get back in the saddle without anyone holding the reins for me.”
“Well, it’s settled then.” Rose smiles, looking relieved. “And after your dates, you can report back. You’re going to be just fine, I know it.”
“Thanks for the vote of confidence.”
Rose scribbles a few things in her notebook while I finish the last of my coffee. The door behind me chimes, and her eyes lift in surprise at the sound of a voice I could pick out in any crowd.
“Rose Taylor, I’ll be darned! I heard you were back in town, but this old dog here didn’t tell me you were the reason he couldn’t meet for breakfast.” I turn just in time to see Larry wagging his eyebrows at her.
“Larry Price, what do I owe the pleasure? Still charming the hearts of Sugar Plum’s finest, I see. Guess not much has changed since high school.” There’s an air of playfulness in her voice that I don’t expect. Larry was in the same class as Rose and me growing up, and he never did take it easy on her. We were all friends, but Larry especially liked to get a rise out of Rose.
I always thought Rose was beautiful in her own way, but Larry was shallow even in grade school. He picked on her for her thick glasses in the third grade and again when she had to get braces in middle school. Then, he crossed the line in junior high by popping her bra strap in homeroom. She never seemed to let it get to her, though. She was tougher than any boy I knew when it came to showing emotion. “Never let them see you cry,” she’d always say. And she didn’t. It was the only thing about her I ever loved and hated all at the same time.
“And look at you,” he says, giving me a nudge. “If I’d have known you’d be this much of a looker, I’d have asked you out myself.”
Rose’s smile is fixed, but when I see her eyes start to narrow, I clear my throat to break the tension. “We were just going over some notes. I told you Gemma was trying to talk me into dating again. I figured since Rose is the expert, she could help me out in that department.”
“Think you can find this ol’ boy a date, huh? I have an idea. You should fix him up with a date for the high school reunion, and while you’re at it, find one for me, too.”
“Never thought I’d see the day when Leisure Suit Larry came to me for help with dating, but it’s a hard pass.” Rose’s laugh comes out in a snort, and Larry drops his head in defeat.
“You know, it’s not the worst idea,” I counter.
“Henry, please. You don’t think it’s a good idea to fix one of my girls up with him, do you?”
“Him, no. But what about me? You said it yourself that you weren’t planning on going to the reunion. So… maybe you can find me a date for the dance, so I’m not stuck holding up the wall all night.”
Rose blinks and leans back in her chair, chewing her bottom lip like she always does when thinking over one of my harebrained ideas. “I mean, I guess we could do that if it’s what you really want.”
“Yeah,” Larry chimes in. “And then I’ll find a date of my own, so we could double up. Dinner and dancing with a couple of foxy ladies—sounds like my kind of party. Just make sure you find this guy a real looker.”
***
My next few practice dates are enough to make me question my sanity. How did I let Gemma convince me that any of this was a good idea?
On Wednesday, I leave Asher to tend the ranch while I go meet Dana, a pilates instructor who lives a few towns over, at The Cozy Corner Bookshop and Bistro.
I’m a few minutes early and get to talking sports with the owner, Tom Loveland, while his wife, Teresa, whips up a fresh plate of cheese kolaches. My stomach growls, and I help myself to two that taste exactly like the ones you can only find at the tiny Czechoslovakian bakery on I-35, just north of Waco.
When Dana arrives, we spend the rest of our time walking up and down the rows of bookshelves. I learn that Dana is a fan of romance novels and writes on the side. The conversation really heats up when she tells me what she writes. Apparently, there’s quite a market for Harley Quinn romance novels—or at least, that’s what I think she calls them.
I’ll tell you, trying to distract myself with thoughts of just about anything other than the ideas she has for her next novel is proving to be quite the challenge. And for a man pushing fifty who’s never even seen the inside pages of a Playboy magazine, the conversation is educational, to say the very least.
On the plus side, she does give me ample opportunity to talk about myself. Having a stranger ask me about my family isn’t as daunting as I anticipated, but it’s likely I have Rose to thank for that. She took a lot of time asking me practice questions she thought might come up on some of my dates.
Two days later, I’m going on my next date with Cami. Rose warns me that Cami doesn’t eat meat, so I ask her to meet me for dinner at the Desert Rose Café since it’s the only place in town with a salad bar.
But boy, does that turn south fast. I never think I’ll hear the end of it when I try to order the chicken fried steak. So much for the adage, “Live and let live.” As luck would have it, Cami is a hard-core vegan, and even the leather chairs offend her. The date ends almost as fast as it starts after she lectures me on the cruel treatment of animals at commercial feedlots and poultry farms, which I find particularly ironic considering that none of the practices she describes are used by smaller operations like the one I run. Even so, I let her go without a fight.
The silver lining is that now I understand how important it is to find a partner willing to accept you as you are. I’d never ask a woman to change her beliefs for my sake. As for mine, I believe God gave us dominion over all animals to use with prudence and thanksgiving, including raising livestock to put food on the family table.
When Sunday rolls around, Rose fixes me up with another woman named Emily, who’s visiting from Austin. Feeling like fresh air might do me some good, I suggest we go for a horseback ride in the afternoon, but Emily has me meet her at the county municipal airport instead.
When I hear they offer flying lessons, I’m immediately apprehensive. I never was one for heights… or planes, so you can imagine my shock when I show up and find out she booked a pilot to take us skydiving.
I try to explain that I’ve had a lifelong fear of heights ever since a family trip to the Grand Canyon in 1984 went haywire, but she insists I try it anyway—something about ‘immersion therapy’?
Sadly, we’re almost fifteen thousand feet in the air before I finally chicken out, and to add insult to injury, Emily accuses me of being boring and makes the jump without me. I’m surprised the pilot doesn’t ask for my man card when I ask him to fly me back to safety.
When I call Rose to fill her in on the date, she apologizes. “I don’t know why these women are so afraid to let a man take the lead and plan the date,” she says.
I laugh and do my best to reassure her that the experience didn’t forever ruin me for dating, but her tone makes me think I’m not the first client she’s matched with such a strong-willed woman.
“You’re doing great, Rose. I can’t thank you enough for being so patient with me. I know it can’t be easy being this far away from all your regular clients. I just hope I’m not making your job too hard.”
“Oh, please. After dealing with all my Dallas troublemakers, you’ve been a breath of fresh air. But maybe we should be casting a wider net.”
“Wider net, as in…?”
“How do you feel about… long-distance dating?”
I’m not sure I understand where she’s going with her train of thought, but if any more planes are involved, count me out.