Chapter 19
ABEL
This is it. I pat my hair down before I knock on Buckle’s door.
I kind of wish I had asked Perry for a ride or we could have walked here together, but the walk to the Rising estate wasn’t bad alone.
It gave me time to do a few breathing exercises.
Sure, it’s freezing cold, but that helped too, if I’m honest.
Last night’s marathon porn watching was a bit eye opening. I watched a few of the links Buckle and Perry sent, then fell down a few rabbit holes of things that seemed interesting and now all I have on my mind are cocks, asses, and Omega slick. My dick is painfully, annoyingly hard despite the cold.
As a Beta, I don’t give off pheromones when I’m horny and that’s the biggest blessing I have right now.
My teeth chatter now that I’ve stopped moving. I thought about flying over, but then the whole I don’t have clothes situation and I don’t want to sit around in Buckle’s oversized clothes. So walk it was. I usually walk or fly everywhere, anyway.
I grin when Perry opens the door.
“Sweetness.” He leans in and kisses my cheek before moving out of the way to let me in.
The house smells amazing and I breathe in deeply.
“Our Alpha cooked for us,” Perry whispers.
“It smells so good.” My tummy rumbles and I follow Perry into the kitchen, where Buckle pushes a pan into the oven.
“Abel.” Buckle smiles and comes in for a hug. He’s warm and envelopes my entire body in his hold.
“How are both of you?” I ask.
Buckle frowns when he looks between the two of us. “Your coats. Let me have them.” He holds out a hand and we shrug out of them. “I’m already messing this up.”
I shake my head.
“Tell me where to take them.” I grab Perry’s coat.
Buckle frowns. “You are my guests.”
“Please let me help.” I bat my lashes.
Perry chuckles at my antics.
“Okay,” Buckle mumbles. “There’s a closet by the front door with hangers.”
I turn on my heel and rush back towards the door. The closet’s empty and I hang the coats before racing back to my mates.
The way Perry and Buckle look at each other stops me in my tracks. They look so perfect.
“Abel?” Perry says my name. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I lie.
Perry knows though, and he walks over to me and lifts my chin. “Don’t lie to us. What’s wrong?”
“The two of you just seem so perfect for each other. I don’t know why Fate threw me in too.”
“Fate didn’t throw you in,” Buckle says, rounding the counter and joining Perry.
I’m not sure I believe them, though. Not yet anyway.
“How can we help, sweetness,” Perry says.
I nibble my bottom lip. “Can I have some pheromones?”
“Gladly.” Buckle steps closer and drags his knuckles down the side of my cheek so softly I chase his touch.
Perry brushes his hand through my hair, and I need his touch, too.
“You’re so touch starved,” Perry says. “What about we cuddle on the couch until the bread’s done?”
“I’d like that,” I say.
Buckle leads us to the living room and plops on the couch. It’s one of those huge sectionals with a chaise lounge on one end and I want to claim that spot for my own when we start the DVD later.
“I want to sit in the middle,” I say, and plop down with enough space on both sides.
Perry links his hands with Buckles when they settle down.
It’s like I’m in a giant Abel sandwich and I want to just live like this with them on both sides of me.
Their pheromones are so nice, and I sink into the couch.
“So,” Perry starts. “Did you watch any of the links we sent you? How did that go?”
My entire body goes hot. Hot as a phoenix flaming out into death. I swallow and lick my lips. “It was... Educational. I got lost down a few rabbit holes and my fuck list is longer now.”
Buckle snorts. “You have a fuck list?” He presses a kiss to my hair.
“Yeah? Is that weird? I figured its good to have so I don’t forget anything I want to try.”
Perry walks his fingers over my forearm. “Did you touch yourself while you watched the videos?”
“No,” I whisper. “I had too much of an educational curiosity to be aroused, I guess? I don’t know. Like, I want to try some of it eventually, but dunno, there was something missing. Or I’m messed up and wrong somehow.”
“Not even close,” Buckle says. “Porn isn’t for everyone.
“I enjoyed it! But probably not for the reasons I was supposed to.” I can’t help the grin. “Like... It’s fascinating watching someone take a huge cock! Or a knot.” I lift a fist and look at it. My hand is still smaller than any of the knots in the videos I watched.
“Fuck, I love big cocks,” Perry says.
“I watched a lot of knotting videos. Watching the Omegas beg for more. There were a bunch of Heat videos that were intense. I just kept hitting random videos. They give you so many options!”
Buckle adjusts himself, and I smirk. Little ‘ol me making an Alpha squirm. The thought makes me hot.
“I look forward to tonight,” I say.
Buckle groans. “Don’t say things like that. You’re making me hard.”
I blink up at him. “We’re just talking.”
Perry leans in. “And he’s imagining us both naked, on our knees and begging to suck his cock. Aren’t you, Alpha?”
The timer for the oven goes off and Buckle jumps to his feet.
“Saved by the bell,” he says.
His pheromones follow him, and I lean into Perry. “Sorry.”
“Don’t be,” Perry says. “I’m looking forward to later.” He winks, then I help him up and we walk hand-in-hand to the kitchen.
“Wait!” Buckle says. “Everything isn’t ready. I still need to—”
Perry grabs the plates on the edge of the counter. I take the silverware and a handful of napkins. We’ll probably need them.
When Buckle starts to protest us setting the table, I glare back at him. He follows behind us and plates the food.
“Sit. Please,” Buckle says as he brings a plate with garlic bread and sits himself. He’s at the head of the table with me and Perry on opposite sides.
“I feel like I’m too far away from everyone,” I mumble.
Perry nods and lifts his plate and utensils to sit closer to Buckle. I do the same.
“Much better.” I grin at the plate. “I love these noodles! They’re so swirly.”
“I wanted something fun, but not too silly. I almost made heart-shaped pasta instead.” Buckle nods to a box on the counter.
“That can be next time,” Perry says.
“Eat up.” Buckle lifts his fork and knife. “It’s not exactly spaghetti. I kinda did my own thing, but I think it turned out well.”
I take a bite and moan at the same time Perry does, but my moan doesn’t come out so sexual. I blush because his moan does something to me and I squirm in my seat.
“Our Alpha is an amazing cook,” Perry says when he swallows down another few mouthfuls.
I nod and shove more in my mouth.
“And I have dessert, too. For later.”
“You think of everything,” I say around a mouthful of food.
“Nah, Aaron and Pax helped. Aaron’s been teaching me how to cook. For the last several years, they’ve invited me for dinner at least once a week. I started to feel bad and asked Aaron to teach me to cook and I started cooking simple things for them every couple weeks.”
“That’s so nice,” I say.
Buckle sighs. “I think you both know how I came to Mink Hollow? I was in love with Pax for so long. Aaron asked if I wanted to move here and I said yes. I couldn’t imagine life without my best friend.
I still can’t. And until like a month ago I pined hard for him.
Therapy helped, but had Fate not intervened, I’d probably still be pining.
” He sets his fork on the table. “I still love him.”
Perry and I both stop eating.
“Of course you do,” Perry says. “You can’t just shut that kind of love off in an instant.”
Buckle shakes his head. “No, I mean. Yes, I still love him, but it’s morphed into a different kind of love. Therapy helped me see how I was putting Pax on a pedestal because of how he’d helped me when I needed it the most.”
“How did he help you?” I ask.
Buckle swipes a hand through his hair and takes a few bites. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand, smearing sauce on his skin.
“You don’t have to tell us,” Perry says, and I nod.
“I want to. I just hadn’t figured out how yet.”
“Take your time,” I say, reaching for his hand. I wish I had pheromones I could push to him to help. But I’m just a Beta. My shoulders slump.
Buckle puts his big hand over mine and gives it a pat.
Buckle takes a deep breath. “Pax didn’t know the entire truth of what happened to my dad until a few years ago.”
My stomach twists.
“Pax and I bonded a lot because we didn’t have dads. His walked out on the family and mine.” Buckle swallows and looks to the ceiling.
Perry rubs a hand up Buckle’s shoulder. “We’re here for you.”
“I’m just going to get it out. Sometime after mom had the third set of triplets.
I’m from the middle set. Dad and I were playing in our shifted forms. He always took his time to make sure we all had time with him all to ourselves.
I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going and ran out into the road. ”
I squeeze my eyes shut.
“Dad followed. I was out of harm’s way, but dad.”
“No,” I whisper.
“He was so crushed his body didn’t shift back to human. It was my fault.”
“No,” Perry and I say together.
“Don’t say that. Don’t blame yourself,” I say.
“You were a child,” Perry says.
“I know, but—” Buckle sighs. “That’s it.” He shovels more food in his mouth.
“Thank you for sharing,” I say. “I know I take up a lot of the, uh, emotional stuff with my baggage from Hawk Ridge.”
“It’s not a competition,” Perry says softly. “I think we all have a lot of baggage. It makes us who we are. But I don’t think it keeps us from our full potential.”
I nod and go back to my food. “Mine just keeps me afraid.”
“Sweetness. Look at me.”
I do, but it’s hard to keep eye contact. He’s so intense.
“I understand the fear. I had it too when I lived in Opossum Nook. The Nook isn’t as bad as Hawk Ridge, I’ll admit that, but they oppressed us in a lot of the same ways.
Sex was frowned upon, even for Omegas in Heat without partners.
I still haven’t had a Heat with a partner out of fear.
I left home. Left my family. Left my friends.
I couldn’t live that way anymore. I had to find someone to smuggle me out.
My best friend wouldn’t come with me because she didn’t want to abandon her family.
I’m selfish. I wanted peace and freedom.
I wanted to be me, not a scared Omega. They were going to auction me off when I turned twenty-one.
I wasn’t having it. I ran and found Mink Hollow.
I’d do it again. I love my siblings, but I couldn’t stay and watch them make the same choices and mistakes as generations before us.
” Perry sighs and nods. “Feels good to let it out.” His shoulders drop and he relaxes before taking a few gulps of water.
Buckle nods. “It really does feel good to share. Mom doesn’t blame me, at least she never has to my face and I appreciate that so much.”
“I’m glad to know.” It gives a little more insight to why Buckle is so protective aside from him being an Alpha. “We should cuddle after dinner.”
“I think I need that,” Buckle says. “Seconds anyone?” He lifts his plate as he pushes to his feet.
“Full,” I say, pressing a hand to my stomach.
Perry follows Buckle back to the kitchen.
There really is something about learning more about these two that makes me happy.
“I’d like to cuddle in my bed,” Buckle says when he comes back. “The couch is comfortable, but I’d like to hold you both.”
“That’s fine by me,” I say.
“I’m agreeable to that,” Perry says as he sits across from me again. “It’s my preferred way of cuddling.”
We chat about the upcoming festival and dance. Both of them grilling me for information.
“The offer still stands if you’re interested in a booth,” I say to Perry.
“I think we’d like that. Elsbeth came by and pretty much said we had to have one.” I grin into my water glass before taking a drink.
I fight off a grin. “She was very adamant at the meeting. Something about naughty Valentines and I agree.”
“Then it’s a go,” Perry says.
“I can help somehow too,” Buckle says. “Maybe I can run between both of your booths for support.”
I nod. “We’ll need runners for various things if you’re serious.”
“So serious!”
We finish dinner and wash up before filing down the hall to Buckle’s bedroom. It’s not as intimidating as it was last time I was in here. Plus, there’s more color than last time.
“You decorated a little,” Perry says.
Buckle removes his shirt and I look away, but not before I take in the sculpted furry chest.
“Mmm, so yummy,” Perry purrs.
Buckle drops into bed and slides to the middle. Perry doesn’t hesitate and slots next to him, wrapping an arm around Buckle’s waist. I shuck off my shoes and climb into the bed too, sinking into Buckle’s warm body.
“So nice.” I cuddle close, and Perry links our hands together while I try to bury myself in Buckle.
They both push their pheromones and I soak them up. “I wish I could give you calming pheromones,” I mumble.
“You don’t have to, your presence is enough,” Perry says.
“I’m anxious all the time,” I say.
“Not so much since we’ve started seeing each other,” Buckle says.
“Haven’t you noticed how much calmer you are?” Perry asks.
My mouth opens and closes. “Things have been calmer in my mind.”
Perry squeezes my arm. “Rest. We can all use it after all that talking.”
I smile, knowing he’s right. It doesn’t take long for the three of us to pass out. I’m safe in their arms.