Chapter 109
Mireya
Past
Play - October Birds by Flower Face
Best Friends
I didn’t sleep that night. Mom had been vomiting a lot and dad hit her again. I tried to step in, but I got hit with his belt on my back and I couldn’t close my eyes after that. Every time I lay down to sleep, it hurts too much.
I try to stay standing even in class but I want to sleep. Dad didn’t even want me to come today anyway.
I stayed in the toilets, sitting on the floor, my back against the wall. Eyes closed then open, I’m trying to rest before I have to go back to class when I hear girls coming in.
“Ugh stop it, she’s so…no actually just stop, you’re weird,” one of them says, laughing mid-sentence. “Like nobody even wants you here, you know that right?”
“Yeah nobody cares, she always does this thing, it’s so annoying,” another voice jumps in. “Just leave her, she’s doing it again.”
“Wait, wait, what if we like…make her drink from here or something? I swear she’ll shut up then.”
I don’t hear an answer from the person they’re talking to, so I push the door open while I stand up.
I hate mean people. I hate them.
They all turn around. Three girls. One a little further away. She has a sad face, her mouth is going down and her eyes are wet. But she’s wearing lots of colors, her hair is nice and her braid is perfectly done. She probably was happy before those girls talked to her like that.
“Leave her alone.” I’m just tired and I really don’t like these girls. I want it to stop. I don’t like how they’re talking. The other girl looks sad and I don’t like seeing people like that.
They turn to me and scream in a loud voice, “What is your problem?”
I don’t answer, I’m looking at her, she’s not moving. Why is she not saying anything back?
“You three suck,” I say. I really don’t like them. “Just leave her alone.”
One of them laughs like I said something funny. “She’s always—”
I don’t care what she’s saying. “Just leave her alone or I’m going to hit you.”
I think I might actually do it if they don’t stop.
“It’s always the weird ones…” The one in the middle whispers but I heard it and I’m tired of her voice, so I step forward.
“You’re loud,” I say. “You’re loud and annoying and you don’t shut up.” I don’t like how they’re still here. “Go away,” I say again. “Fucking leave!”
And then they do, still talking, still annoying.
The door slams a little, and it’s quiet after that. The girl doesn’t move while I go back to sit down and close my eyes. I feel her coming closer and I look up at her.
She wipes her face quickly when she sees I’m still there. “…Why did you do that?”
“Because I don’t like mean people.”
She doesn’t answer right away, then she nods. “My name is Hayzel.”
“…Okay.”
I stay near the wall, repeating numbers in order. I don’t like when people come close to me, it feels weird. So I repeat them again and again in my head while she keeps looking at me. 19 1 6 5 - 19 1 6 5
Safe. Safe. Safe.
“Six… five…” I don’t realize I’m whispering them until she talks again, sitting next to me.
“What are you saying?”
I stop and look up. “…Nothing,” I replied quickly. My mouth closes like it got caught doing something wrong.
You can’t have friends, Reya. You’re sick in the head.
She tilts her head. “You were saying random numbers.”
I shrug. “It’s a secret.” It sounds stupid when I say it out loud. I already know that, but she doesn’t laugh.
She just nods like that makes sense somehow. “Okay,” she whispers. “I do that too. Counting I mean, it’s really fun. Don’t you think? Also what’s your name?”
I look at her again, properly this time. She’s still smiling when our eyes meet. “You talk a lot,” I say, softer now.
She blinks, then smiles wider like I gave her something back. “You listen a lot too,” she says. “So we balance.”
I don’t answer. The numbers come back again anyway.
19 1 6 5. 19 1 6 5.
“I like your eyes,” she adds suddenly. “They’re blue. That’s my favorite color.”
I pause. “…It’s my favorite too.”
That feels easier than I thought. Talking to someone my age. It’s not that bad… Maybe if I hide the voices she’ll stay.
“Then we’re friends,” she says.
I should say no. I usually do. But she’s still there, still not moving away, still acting like nothing about me is strange or wrong. “…Okay,” I accept.
And she looks like that was the only correct answer. “I don’t know how this works,” she mumbles.
“Me neither.”
“We’ll learn together, okay?”
I keep repeating the numbers in my head while she sits next to me with a box of cut carrots and offers me some.
“My name is Mireya,” I finally say and she replies with a big smile, "nice to meet you Mireya. We're going to be the best of friends"
6 18 9 5 14
Friend…