Chapter 7
7
Nikki
N ikki’s mouth went dry. She didn’t think she’d be able to speak if she tried. Her mind was whirling with various thoughts, and she couldn’t keep them straight. She had the deepest desire to tell him about her falling out with Caroline—how she’d hated what her friend had done to him. She wanted Mateo to know that their friendship had crumbled shortly after their failed wedding, and yet she didn’t want to admit that it had taken her so long to cut her friend out of her life.
Then there was the borderline flirty behavior she got from Mateo when people weren’t nearby. She was imagining things. She had to be.
What she’d been noticing probably had everything to do with her own crush and nothing more. Mateo had always been a flirty guy. Just because he didn’t have a personal space bubble didn’t mean he wanted anything more from her.
The man before her was being his usual nice self. That was all.
She pushed past her disappointment. The fact that she could rationalize his behavior was more than enough to get her head on straight. Nikki frowned, though, wishing she could air out everything she needed to regarding his ex. She wanted to make it crystal clear she didn’t approve of Caroline—but why was that exactly?
Because she liked his attention. That’s why. Grr. She didn’t need his attention. She needed this job.
He cleared his throat, his eyes sparkling with mischief. “How about two truths and a lie? We haven’t played that game in a long while.”
She snorted, then immediately covered her mouth with her hand, heat filling her face. Caroline had hated it when she laughed like that, and ever since she’d made fun of her all those years ago, Nikki had focused on fixing every last bit of herself that anyone might find unattractive.
But Mateo didn’t appear to be bothered by her laugh. Instead, he looked amused.
Amused!
And that made her blush even worse. Was he making fun of her? She’d always been the less attractive of her little friend duo with Caroline. They were opposites in every way possible. Where Caroline was poised, blonde, thin, and had legs for days, Nikki looked like she preferred to enjoy what life had to offer in terms of sweets and other indulgences.
She wasn’t unhealthy . Though she’d had more than one doctor tell her that she could stand to lose a few pounds.
Gah! Now she was going down the road she’d promised herself she’d steer clear from. It had taken half a decade to finally get to the point where she could be proud of who she was and every curve that came with her.
Mateo was still watching her intently, his eyes searching hers as if he could uncover every single secret she carried. Well, not today. She wasn’t going to indulge him one bit.
Nikki placed a hand on her hip. “Pass.”
For a moment his expression faltered. Had she hurt his feelings? Or had he finally realized that he wasn’t as irresistible as he thought.
Unfortunately, he was more than irresistible. She was just lucky that they were still in a room with several other cowboys who might look their way at any moment. She wouldn’t be made the fool, no matter how tempting it was to play along with Mateo’s flirtatious nature.
She faced the group of men, placing her hands atop the table where the food was set out.
He did the same, and inadvertently, their fingers grazed one another.
Nikki jolted away, disbelief swirling within her as she stared down at her hand. Either the static electricity was on a different level here in this building, or something strange had just happened.
“Come on, Nikki. You’re a blast from my past. Why not humor me?” Mateo said far too close to her ear.
She was tempted to shove him away from the feelings he was stirring inside her. Logic was dictating that he was only toying with her. They had nothing in common. And she knew better than to allow herself any sort of fantasy regarding him.
But her heart? That was another story.
Her heart remembered back to a time when he was sweet and friendly. How, once upon a time, he’d told Caroline to stop putting her down. Or when a bunch of jocks had gotten together with some of the cheerleaders and stolen her clothes from the locker room, Mateo had turned the tables on them, and they’d had to walk to the middle of the commons in their underwear to get their own clothes.
Those memories seemed so long ago, and Nikki had nearly forgotten all about them.
Mateo had been nothing but nice to her, and here she was, trying to keep him at arm’s length for what purpose? Because of some deep-buried crush?
She sighed with a new sort of resignation. “What do you want to know?”
The light that returned to his eyes was enough to burn a hole right through to her heart. “First of all, tell me about your son.”
Paxton was in the kitchen. He hadn’t been interested in leaving the kitchen while she worked. The fact that Mateo was asking about him unnerved Nikki to the point that her walls came right back up into place.
“Why do you want to know about Paxton?”
Mateo shrugged, his eyes shifting to the cowboys as Daniel started leading what could only be an employee meeting. His hands were on the table again, and they were oh so close to her own. It wouldn’t take any effort at all for her pinky to graze his.
She had half a mind to do just that—if only to recreate the sensation that had occurred just moments ago. Nikki was so wrapped up in trying to decide whether or not to let her fingertips graze his that she hadn’t realized Mateo had been answering her question. And now he was waiting for an answer of his own. Wait a minute. He’d mentioned her ex. Maybe he’d shifted his question because he could tell she was uncomfortable talking about her son.
Shoot! She really should have been listening.
Well, she wasn’t going to make him repeat himself. That would be mortifying all on its own.
Nikki cleared her throat and gave Mateo a side-eyed glance. “There’s not much to say. It wasn’t a terrible relationship in the grand scheme of things.”
He huffed. “That doesn’t sound good either.”
She shrugged. “We fell out of love.” Nikki wasn’t certain, but she thought she might have sensed his whole body stiffening at her confession. The embarrassment over her inability to keep a man interested was like a sour, twisting rope that knotted within her stomach and threatened to come up and out any way it could. Nikki frowned, wishing she hadn’t said it.
Mateo didn’t move. His eyes remained locked on Daniel where he stood.
“I mean, we were in love once. I wouldn’t have married him if I hadn’t been.”
“But he cares for Paxton? Spends time with him?”
Her brows creased, and then she realized her mistake. Mateo thought her ex was the same man who had fathered Paxton. While Dennis had been good to Paxton, he’d never wanted to adopt him. He’d never wanted children.
Nikki swallowed hard. “Actually, his father isn’t in the picture.”
Mateo’s head snapped around and fire filled his gaze. “What?” The single word sounded like it was spoken from something that was half-man and half-beast.
She faced him and forced a smile. “You misunderstand. My ex isn’t Paxton’s father. Not his biological one. Paxton knew this growing up, so when I ended things with Dennis…” She paled as she noted the confusion mixing with the irritation in his eyes. She’d always been good at reading him. Or at least she had been when they were younger.
“So, this Dennis guy… he’s not related to Paxton by blood… but he was his dad, right?”
Heat rushed to her cheeks, blossoming beneath her skin. This sounded like such a mess even to her. Nikki shook her head. “Dennis never wanted kids. He wasn’t cruel to Paxton or anything, but he never wanted to be called ‘dad’ either. It was like he’d put up with having one since he was part of the packaged deal.”
Mateo’s expression morphed into something resembling distaste. “Sure sounds like he was cruel to me. Kids don’t understand the nuances of that sort of thing.”
She flinched beneath the weight of his judgmental tone. “Yeah, well, he loved me, and he cared for Paxton, so that was enough…” Her argument was weak, and she was beginning to hate herself for letting Mateo get under her skin.
“So what about his father? His biological one?”
“What does it matter to you?” Nikki snapped. “He’s out of the picture. A mistake in a long list of mistakes I’ve made in my lifetime.”
His eyes softened, and he shifted closer to her. But she wasn’t going to let him intimidate her. She wouldn’t back away. Nikki had learned how to be strong in the face of adversity. And this situation was no different.
He lifted a hand slightly, and for a moment she imagined that he was going to reach out and caress her face. The way he was looking at her—Goodness… No. She couldn’t go there. Nikki schooled her features in an attempt to recover the bantering tone they’d had. “Your turn.”
Mateo’s hand dropped to his side. That easy smile returned as if their conversation had never happened. “What about me?”
“What have you been up to?” She’d noted that he didn’t wear a ring, but in his line of work, she wouldn’t be surprised if he chose not to for safety reasons. She figured he wasn’t married, but he could be dating someone. If he was, she couldn’t imagine anyone approving of him shamelessly flirting with her.
It would be best to get to the bottom of it now so she could kick her desire for him once and for all.
“Are you wanting to know about my exes? Because I don’t have a kid.”
She scoffed. “You’re the one who chose that line of questioning. It’s only fair you continue it.”
His grin was almost a wicked one. “Okay. No kids. No marriages failed or otherwise. I only came close that one time, and up until recently, I had no intention of going down that path again. Is that enough information for you?”
“Until recently? What changed?” She only realized she’d spoken the question aloud when he ended up answering it.
“Because up until now, I haven’t noticed anyone who is worth risking my heart for.”
Something weird was taking place in her stomach, consuming the sour and bitter mixture there and replacing it with a jittery, floaty feeling. He wasn’t talking about her, was he?
There was no way she was going to ask him. Talk about embarrassing.
She lifted her chin as if in defiance. “Good luck with that.”
He inched closer still, his voice lowering until it held a husky quality to it. “What about you? Any prospects?”
Nikki barked out a laugh. “Prospects? You mean, have I met anyone I’d jump into the fire for after dealing with my husband falling for someone else and telling me I no longer interested him?” She knew she shouldn’t be directing her anger at Mateo. None of this was his fault. He was just her boss. She should be falling at his feet and thanking him for helping her. And yet, she couldn’t keep the venom from her voice.
Unexpectedly, his alluring grin faltered, and he frowned at her.
“To answer your question. No. And I have zero intention of seeking anything out.” She turned to leave him, but his hand wrapped around her wrist, immobilizing her with his touch. Nikki stared down at where he touched her, and she froze as the warmth from his touch seeped deep into her bones.
“Nikki—” he whispered.
“Mateo, you have anything else to add?” Daniel’s voice called, and Mateo released her as if he’d been burned. He glanced over to the men, and she chose that moment to escape him.
The whole situation was weird, and she needed to clear her head before she let any wayward thoughts take over—more specifically, thoughts of Mateo being anything more than an old friend.