Chapter 19
19
Nikki
“N ow we get to celebrate!” Nikki whooped. “No more wearing your sling.” She nudged Paxton with a laugh. “What do you want to do?”
Her son grinned up at her, though he held his arm to his side with a noticeable amount of caution. “Do you think Mateo will let me start my riding lessons again?”
Nikki ruffled her son’s hair. “It wouldn’t hurt to ask.” Though, deep down, she wasn’t sure how Mateo was doing. Lately, he’d been distracted. It wasn’t that he was distancing himself from her. There wasn’t a single day that they didn’t spend some time together. She’d gotten to know him on a much deeper level than she had when they were younger.
There was just a niggling feeling of discontent that refused to disengage from her mind. Mateo was struggling. And he wasn’t willing to open up to her.
“What’s wrong, Mom?”
Nikki startled and glanced down at her son. It was then that she realized that she’d been frowning. Hmm. She needed to get better at hiding her concerns from her son. He was already too intuitive for his own good. He had a knack for seeing when she was down. Forcing a smile, she reached for him and tickled him until his own worry lines disappeared from around his brows.
“How about you and I get some ice cream on our way home from the doctor?”
“Can we get something for Mateo?”
“Sure, buddy. What do you think he’d like?”
Paxton made a show of considering the question and what his answer should be. He tapped his chin and stared up at the sky before holding up his finger. “I know. We should get him a giant cookie.”
She laughed. “Yeah? What kind. The bakery has sugar cookies, chocolate chip cookies, snickerdoodles?—”
“Definitely chocolate chip,” Paxton said with finality. “He likes chocolate chip cookies like me.”
Nikki couldn’t contain her additional laughter. If there was any proof that Paxton had begun to accept the relationship she had with Mateo, it was how close the two had continued to become. There were only a few short-lived moments when he didn’t seem sure about them. It usually only occurred when Mateo completely blocked out the world and it was just him and her.
She could understand Paxton’s concern when that happened. He’d experienced being overlooked when she’d been dating Dennis. She’d expected their relationship to improve over time, but Dennis simply didn’t connect with her son. The tipping point had been when Dennis told her firmly that he had zero interest in adopting Paxton—right in front of her boy.
They’d gotten divorced shortly after that.
Nikki pulled open the car door for her son and gestured for him to climb inside. She gave him a reassuring smile before shutting the door. Mateo had never said one way or the other if he’d want to adopt Paxton. She liked to think that if she asked him to, he’d be on board with her request.
A thrill coursed through her, and she couldn’t wait for that point in their relationship to come to pass. She slid into the driver’s seat and glanced through the rearview mirror at her son. He was looking out the window, a happy expression on his face.
They picked up their desserts and made their way back to the ranch. The second they arrived, Paxton took off in search of Mateo.
“Careful, bud!” she called after him. “I don’t want you getting hurt again.” But he was too far away from her to hear her. That kid was fast when he wanted to be. She shook her head with a chuckle as she dipped back into her car and retrieved her phone. It lit up at that moment with a notification from her social media app.
She frowned.
Caroline Harris has sent you a message.
Her heart leaped into her throat, and she glanced up as if reading Caroline’s name was all it took for the woman to materialize. Nikki had blocked her friend after their falling out about five years ago. From the looks of it, Caroline had made a new profile.
Nikki swallowed hard as she stared at that message while her stomach clenched. They hadn’t left things on good terms. Whatever this message was, it would surely be related to how things had ended, and Nikki didn’t want to deal with such a confrontation. She grimaced as she considered the two choices before her.
She could respond, or she could ignore her. It wouldn’t hurt to see what Caroline had messaged her, though, right? Nikki would be able to get a good feel for what Caroline wanted. And what if she’d finally seen the light? What if Caroline wanted to reconcile?
Nikki had been raised to be kind to others even if they’d wronged her. She could give Caroline forgiveness. And if Caroline was just going to be her regular old self? Well, then Nikki would ignore her and not bother messaging her back.
She nodded as if the movement alone was all she needed to give herself strength to follow through. Then she opened the message from her ex-best friend.
Hi Nicole! It’s been forever. Can you believe how long it’s been since we hung out? I heard from Heather that you moved out of Colorado Springs and to some tiny town. I always thought you were more of a small-town girl. I bet it suits you so much better. Guess what! This is hilarious. I’m going to be visiting Copper Creek next week and we should meet up! I can’t believe that fate has put us in each other’s lives again! And if everything goes well, then maybe we can keep hanging out. Missed you, girl!
Nikki gaped as she read the message a second time. No apologies. No mention that they’d gotten in a fight. It was like Caroline didn’t remember anything about what happened between them. She actually wanted to meet up. It was ridiculous.
Or was it?
She started second-guessing her own memories of the two of them. Nikki had been upset with Caroline, but maybe she hadn’t made it clear enough. And if she never told Caroline that she’d been hurt, Caroline wouldn’t know.
But she had to know. Not even Caroline was that dense.
Nikki huffed a sharp breath and shoved her phone into her purse. She wasn’t going to dignify Caroline’s message with a response. She refused to admit even to herself that she was irritated with not only Caroline but herself for allowing the woman to worm her way back into her mind after everything was going so well.
It didn’t matter that Caroline had once been engaged to Mateo.
Nor did it matter that Mateo avoided any conversation about the woman.
Right here, right now, he belonged to Nikki. And she belonged to him.
At that moment, the source of her affection came sauntering toward her with Paxton at his side. He’d already taken a bite out of his cookie, and Paxton couldn’t be more thrilled about it.
Nikki’s heart surged like it did every single time she saw them together—her adorable little family. She couldn’t tell Mateo that, though. Not yet. She needed to make sure Mateo was all in. He needed to be fully healed from his shattered past, and she wasn’t sure he was just yet.
Mateo didn’t waste any time closing the distance between them. He claimed her lips with a searing kiss that left her breathless.
“What was that for?” she breathed.
“That’s a thank you.”
“It is?”
He lifted the cookie. “For this.”
Nikki chuckled and glanced down to see a flicker of a frown on Paxton’s face before he grinned.
“See, Mom? I told you he’d like it.”
“You sure did, kiddo,” she agreed. “I’ll make sure I never question you again.”
Mateo ruffled Paxton’s hair. “Paxton was telling me all about how his collarbone is healed up and is as strong as ever. Looks like we’re going to resume our riding lessons.”
Nikki fought the urge to tense. After Paxton got hurt, she was nervous, to say the least. But as long as her son was willing, she wasn’t going to stand in his way. The look on her face must have said it all because Mateo turned to Paxton. “We’re not gonna be able to go riding today, but Sophia made some fresh lemonade. I bet if you ask real nice, she’ll get us some to drink while we relax on the porch before dinner.”
Paxton frowned, his impatience shining through. Surprisingly, he didn’t argue. He took another bite of his ice cream and turned to rush for the house. As soon as Paxton was out of earshot, Mateo leaned in close and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure he stays safe.”
“You can’t guarantee that,” she said, her eyes following Paxton as he ran. “But it’s something I’ve grown accustomed to.”
He frowned, his touch tracing along her jawline. “You’re upset about something.”
Nikki blinked. Geez! Why was she so transparent? She needed to guard her emotions better. Mateo shouldn’t be able to tell from a single glance that she was struggling with something. “I’m fine,” she blurted.
Mateo arched a brow. “Is this about Paxton riding? Or is it something else?”
It was a culmination of things. Yes, she was worried about Paxton. And she was concerned about Mateo holding back from her. Then there was the message from Caroline. Nikki sighed. “Just thinking.”
“Good thinking? Or bad thinking?”
She wanted to laugh, to cover up her weaknesses. But he was being so totally sweet she couldn’t avoid what she said next. “Being a mom means being prepared for the unknown. The future isn’t promised, and all that. In a second, something can happen to change fate.”
“That sounds really dismal,” he said, his voice sad and contemplative.
“Not really,” she said, tilting her head and gifting him with what she prayed was a warm and reassuring smile. “We have to hold on tight to all of the good in our lives, enjoy it, and be grateful for each and every moment.” She lifted her hands to his face and framed it between them. “You’re one of my happy moments.”
“I’m not going anywhere,” he rasped, and his words filled her with a scorching heat that ripped through her body, blasting all her doubts into dust. That was what it was like, being here with him like this. There was good and bad in every relationship. Eventually, he’d confide in her. Eventually , he’d trust her enough to open up and give her everything.
Life was too short to waste it on wondering and fretting.
She pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. “I know,” she whispered.
Her thoughts shifted to Caroline’s message. Life was too short to hold onto the pain of the past, too. If Caroline didn’t think there was anything wrong between them and was reaching out to rekindle something…
Well, Nikki didn’t have to become her friend, but she didn’t have to completely ghost her either. She could meet with Caroline and tell her that she’d moved on from their friendship. It didn’t cost her anything to be kind.
While that idea didn’t cause her inherent joy, it didn’t seem nearly as bad as she’d originally thought. Nikki was the better person, and she wasn’t going to let anyone—let alone Caroline—drag her down.
Mateo grabbed her hand. “Come on. Let’s get that lemonade. And you can show me those X-rays that Paxton is so excited about.”
She laughed. “Sounds like a plan.”