Chapter 10
10
MAVERICK
" T wo beers," Ransom says to the bartender as we settle onto bar stools. This place is dim, the music's low. It's the kind of place people come to brush up against one another, to make connections, to find company. Sure, there are a few couples, but most of the people in here are like me. They want something.
Someone.
"What are we doing here, brother?" Ransom asks, tapping the glass bottle in front of him. "I thought you had your eye on someone."
"Is everybody talking about that?"
"Yep. You've been pretty damn solitary the last decade. So when you mentioned her, then went to that rescue to spend more time with her, word got back to me."
"It's annoying how much we gossip in this family."
Ransom laughs and props an elbow on the bar. "Fair. I don't see it changing anytime soon, though, so it's something you're going to have to accept."
"I can accept it, but I don't have to fucking like it."
"No man, you don't. Go ahead, rage. I'll wait." He stares at me expectantly, slow blinking.
"Asshole."
He grins and takes a sip of his beer, relaxing. He's always been like this. Quiet, watchful. Until he explodes into action. That's a side of him we don't see as much anymore, but when Ransom gets protective, people bleed.
Both versions of him are a protector, but this time, there's nothing for him to fight. It's just fucking life, the toughest opponent.
"You ever get lonely man?" I ask, staring sightlessly at the bottles behind the bar.
His mouth twists and he shifts on his stool. "Not too long ago, I would have said no. Now? I'm not sure how to answer that. We have a great life. A fucking spectacular life. But things are changing fast."
"We do a little less together than we used to."
"True."
"I know I'm alone more than I used to be. I'm not mad that the women are in our family. I just feel…"
"Left out."
"You too?"
Ransom rubs at the edge of his eyebrow. "Maybe. Which is fucking stupid, considering I hoped this would happen."
"You did? You never talked about us finding women or having kids."
"It's the natural progression of everything we've built, though. Seeing you all married, living lives filled with love and warmth, was always the plan."
"And you."
His mouth tightens, but he doesn't answer, eye tracking around the room. Something uncomfortable pricks at the back of my neck.
"And you, Ran. You'll find someone, get married, have kids."
"That's not in the cards for me Mav. It never was."
Something in the way he says it, the absolute certainty, kills the denial on my lips.
The silence stretches between us, heavy with all the things we're not saying. Why is he so certain he'll never find someone, never have the life he's helped us build? I don't know his whole story, but I know he's lost everything, just like most of us did. If we deserve love and a future, then why doesn't he?
But I don't ask. I can't. There's too much hurt there, simmering under the surface, and I'm not sure either of us is ready to poke at it.
Finally, Ransom breaks the silence. "So, what are we doing here, Mav? What's the plan?"
I take a long pull of my beer, letting the cold liquid slide down my throat. "I need a wingman. It's time for me to put some work in. I've been coasting for too long."
Ransom's eyebrows shoot up, but he doesn't question it. Instead, he nods and turns to survey the room. "Alright, let's see what we've got."
He's off his stool in a heartbeat, moving through the crowd with an easy grace that draws plenty of female attention. I watch as he sweet talks a group of women at the end of the bar, his smile wide and charming. They're eating it up, leaning in close and laughing at his jokes. He's always been like that. Able to pour on the charm one minute, then knock a fucker out the next. It's not really a Jekyll/Hyde thing though. More like the undercurrent is always there. And when it comes to women, that undercurrent just makes him even more attractive.
Fucking catnip to cats.
He tips his head at me, and I join them a moment later, sliding into the conversation with a grin. The women are pretty, all long hair and short skirts, and they seem interested enough. I flirt and chat, letting Ransom guide the conversation.
But as the minutes tick by, I realize that none of them are really holding my attention. They're nice enough, but there's no spark, no connection. I find myself comparing them to Cadence, to the way she makes me feel when we're together. They're too polished and put together. Hair straightened, makeup perfect.
Cadence wears makeup at work, but it's simple. She doesn't even try to cover the freckles on her cheeks. Not like these women. They look like they just walked out of a photoshoot.
It's not fair, I know. These women aren't Cadence, and it's not their fault that I can't get her out of my head. But as much as I try to focus on the conversation, on the laughter and the flirting, my mind keeps drifting back to her.
I excuse myself after a while, heading back to the bar for another drink. Ransom joins me a moment later, his brow furrowed.
"Everything okay?"
I shrug, not sure how to put it into words. "They're just not her, you know?"
Ransom nods, understanding in his eyes. "Cadence."
"Yeah."
We fall silent again, each lost in our own thoughts. I know I should let it go, and focus on the women in front of me. But I can't seem to shake the feeling that Cadence is the one I'm meant to be with.
"So why are we here, if all you want is her?"
"I want her, but she's not interested. She's put me into a box labeled 'do not touch' and that's it. I'm her boss, and she won't allow anything to happen. If she's even fucking interested."
"Um, that's never really been an issue for us."
"Which part?"
He grins. "Either. We're not bad looking, we have a fuck of a lot of money. But also, being the boss has never been a problem."
He's right. It hasn't. Declan and Cara hooked up at work. Zach and Maya and Jonas and Janey did too. Hell, Holly and Micah were coworkers. So what's the big fucking problem? "I don't get it. I really don't. She needs the work, obviously, but so did the other women. But they still took a chance."
Ransom frowns and rubs his cheek. "Cara's hell on wheels. She wanted Dec, and I don't think she ever considered him her boss. But even if she did, she knows she's indispensable to me."
That’s true. Ransom would be lost without Cara. "And Zach headhunted Maya, so her job wasn't really on the line. Besides, she would have walked right out the door if she wasn't happy."
"True. That's why she insisted on that probationary period. Janey though, she had extenuating circumstances pushing her toward Jonas."
"He took advantage," I say flatly. He proposed to her in a parking garage, as a way to save her from her brother. She was in a vulnerable position, and he swooped in. It was low, as far as I'm concerned, but when I talked to Janey about it, she seemed certain that marrying him was the right thing to do. And I don't think anyone could argue with the result.
"He did. It fucking worked, though, and I don't think either of them regrets a damned thing."
Judging by the dopey look on their faces when they look at each other? No, they don't regret anything. "Holly only let Micah take care of her because of the fire."
Ransom props his elbows on the bar and absently rubs at his chin. "So if we judge based on the experience of our brothers, the way to get an employee to date you is to ride to the rescue, then show her how good it could be, or to pick someone who knows exactly what they're worth."
"Where the fuck does that leave me? Cadence doesn't need rescuing. That woman is more together than almost anyone I've met. Yeah, she's having a little financial hiccup, but it seems to me like she has life figured out. She doesn't need me at all."
"So you've got nothing?"
"Nick told me to spend time with her so she gets to know the real me, whatever the fuck that means, and hopefully she'll come around."
"Hopefully she'll come around?" he repeats, doubtful. I don't blame him, I am too. The plan doesn't seem to be working at all. "You could just write her a big fucking check, then she can quit, and you can take her on a date."
Simple. Clean. I like it. "Would that work? That's not a bad…ah fuck, its a bad idea."
Ransom chuckles. "Listen, I'm not an expert on women, but I do know how to get what I want. Nick's idea isn't bad, but I don't think standing back, playing the good guy is going to get you that woman. I think you need to be a little more obvious in your intentions."
"And get sued for harassment?"
"You're a fucking lawyer. Don't be a creep. But let her know you think she's beautiful, and you'd like to spend more time with her, in a romantic way. Just don't do it at work. You're never there, anyway."
Cheeks hot, I take a sip of my drink and stare at a black labeled bottle of whiskey. Ransom's low chuckles make my ears burn.
"Well, well, well. Seems you've been spending a little more time at the club? You swinging by every evening? Helping polish silverware?"
I turn and glare at him. "No, I'm not going every fucking night. It's just…sometimes."
Ransom's laughter turns heads. He makes eye contact with a brunette in the corner and winks. Her lips curve in a smile, and she winks right back. I'm guessing he’s going to have very willing company tonight. "So what you're saying is you brought me here to waste my time, because there's no way you're going home with anyone tonight. You have your mind set on one woman, and there's no changing it."
"I didn't know I was doing that, but yeah, I guess."
He shakes his head, still grinning. My phone pings in rapid fire, and Ransom shoots me a look, then sighs and rests his elbow on the bar.
I frown down at my phone, flicking through the messages. More work, more people needing my help. It never ends.
Ransom's watching me, his expression unreadable. "You're taking on a lot of extra cases, aren't you?"
I shrug, trying to play it off. "It's what I do. People need help."
"In your free time, though? When do you have time for anything else?"
The question hits a little too close to home. I have been working a lot lately, taking on cases that no one else wants. But what am I supposed to do? These people need my help.
"I make time for what's important," I say, but even I can hear the defensiveness in my voice.
Ransom raises an eyebrow. "And a relationship? Where does that fit in?"
I open my mouth to respond, then close it again. He's right. I've been so focused on work, on helping others, that I haven't really thought about my own life. My own happiness.
But the thing is, I want that. I want a relationship, someone to come home to at the end of the day. Someone to share my life with.
And when I think about it, really think about it, there's only one person I can imagine filling that role.
Cadence.
I know it won't be easy. I'm overworked, stretched thin. But for her? For the chance at something real, something lasting?
I'd find the time. I'd make the time. Hell, I'm making the time right now. I've been at that shelter three times this week.
Because she's worth it. Worth the effort, worth the sacrifices.
I look up at Ransom, meeting his gaze head-on. "For the right woman, I'd make it work. I'd find a way."
He nods, a small smile playing at the corners of his mouth. "Then maybe it's time to start making some changes. To start putting yourself first for once."
I can do that. I can make some changes. And in the meantime, I'll mostly play it cool like Nick suggested, then let her know how I feel when the time is right.
And until then, I'll focus on my family. And work, because that never fucking ends.