Chapter Sixteen
Sixteen
GRAY WAS NERVOUS. STUPIDLY NERVOUS. Standing in the small bedroom in what they now termed the family quarters, a small section of the lodge that was fully self-contained, he looked in the mirror.
He had a few more gray hairs than the last time he’d gone on a date.
Since coming back to Smile, he’d dodged offers and suggestions from women who knew he was single.
It felt weird to date when he had no intention of doing anything more, especially when he’d known so many of the women for most of his life.
At this point, he’d been divorced as long as he’d been happily married.
Technically, they were married for five years, but one of those was filled with him trying to make things work before moving out.
Even after they’d separated, he’d stayed in Chicago, hoping to reconcile.
By the time he came home, he was moving through life one hour at a time.
Still shocked and broken from his divorce, and the depths to which Lana had let her father into their relationship, dating wasn’t even a thought.
The paperwork on the lodge didn’t finalize until six months after he moved home.
As he started to feel like a human again, like a new version of himself that he was getting to know, he focused on the lodge, his family, and creating a new life.
One where he couldn’t get hurt again. One that wouldn’t destroy the last of his soul that Lana had left in scattered pieces.
If that man, the one he’d been when he came home, were looking back at him in the mirror, he wouldn’t recognize him.
That brought a genuine smile to his face. He liked the man he saw. “I’m happy,” he said to himself.
“How happy are we talking? Should we leave you alone?” His brother’s voice came from right outside his bedroom door, followed immediately by Levi’s muffled laughter.
Asses. He pulled the door open. “What do you two want?”
They grinned at him like a couple of proud idiots. Beckett walked in, surveying Gray, wandering around him in a wide circle.
“Just want to check your fit, as Ollie would say,” Beckett said.
Levi laughed. “Dude. Don’t say that again. Please.” He looked at Gray. “How you doing, man? You good?”
Gray rolled his shoulders and, when Beckett stepped beside him, shoved him in the shoulder. “Stop walking around me like you’re checking out cattle.”
Beckett put both hands on his hips. “How do you know what I’d look like checking out cattle?”
“When he punches you, I’m not jumping in,” Levi warned Beckett.
His brother simply clapped him on the shoulder. “I’m just messing with you. For real. You doing okay? I can’t remember the last time you went on a date.”
He didn’t want to call it that. There was a connotation, an expectation to the word.
It reminded him of that If You Give a Mouse a Cookie children’s book he used to read to Ollie.
If you call it a date, you’re going to want to hold her hand.
If you hold her hand, you’ll want to kiss her.
If you kiss her, you’ll fall, and if you fall …
Gray walked out of his bedroom into the open area that housed a small kitchen setup in one corner with a dining table Jilly had purchased.
On the other side of the room, she’d made a living area, complete with a wide-screen television and lots of family photos on the shelves.
Tall windows let the sun and moonlight in when the rolling blinds were up.
Gray looked out the windows now at the moon curling around the mountains beyond the trees.
He’d never tire of this view. He was happy and he didn’t miss his old life.
He didn’t miss his ex or who he used to be. And that was a gift.
“I didn’t say it was a date,” Grayson reminded Beckett.
Levi sat down on the couch, sinking into the cushions with a tired sigh. They were all working a lot on top of dealing with the wedding plans, Jilly’s pregnancy, and adding in events at the lodge. Grayson needed to give them a break.
Guilt cramped his gut. Here he was worrying about which terminology to use on a night out and the rest of them were, once again, doing the heavy lifting for him. “I don’t have to go tonight,” Gray said.
“What? Why wouldn’t you go? Charlie is great and seems like she could use some fun,” Beckett said, sitting on the arm of the chair.
“I’m working everyone to the bone. You guys both have almost-wives and families and I’m heading out with a stranger instead of spending my time doing some of the many things that need to be done.”
Beckett shook his head. “Let that shit go, Gray. No one is working themselves to the bone. We’re all doing what we enjoy, and you can’t work twenty-four seven.
You lived that life and you weren’t nearly this happy.
Charlie’s a great woman. Don’t put a bunch of expectations on tonight.
Go out and have fun. See where it goes.”
Levi stood up. “I’m proof that you’ll find happiness where you least expect it. All I did was come home. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t be marrying your sister, having a baby with her, and getting to raise Ollie as my own. It’s okay to live your life outside of this place, Gray.”
Right. It was okay. And he didn’t have to have all of the answers now.
He wanted tonight with Charlie. He liked talking to her, being near her.
He really liked kissing her; that had been an unexpected surge of pleasure he’d never felt before.
Ever, which was a bit terrifying, sort of like going too fast on the quads and hitting a bump. A scary, thrilling kind of high.
He nodded, more determined. “You’re right. Get your asses back to work. I’m going out.”
They all laughed and Gray left the lodge feeling like his shoulders had lightened. He hadn’t looked forward to spending time with anyone outside of his family or a couple of his friends in actual years. Tonight was a good step forward for him. No matter where it led.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE focused on teaching Charlie how to drive the boat, but the sweet, flowery scent of her bodywash and the way her laughter carried on the wind as they moved over the water were damn distracting. And alluring.
“I’m letting go now,” Gray said, pulling back the hand he held over hers on the steering wheel.
“Okay,” she said, uncertainty clear in her tone. “At least there’s nothing to run into, really.”
Grayson chuckled, continuing to lean toward the driver’s seat, one hand on the back of it, the other on his thigh, ready, if she needed him to take over. “It’s like driving a car. Only better because it feels like flying and there’s never much traffic.”
She glanced at him, then quickly turned back to the water, her hand twitching on the wheel enough to rock the boat. “Right. Just like driving. Which I’ve done.”
He tensed. “I figured. But maybe I should have asked when the last time was?”
This time, she didn’t look at him, just kept her grip white-knuckled on the wheel. “I don’t think you’ll like the answer.” She smiled then, and even in profile, it stole his breath. “But this is really fun.”
He waited until Lux Cove came into view before switching spots with her so he could pull the boat up to the dock. The valets at their marina were waiting to assist them with tying it up and helping Charlie onto the platform. Gray followed behind her, tipping the valet.
The walkway directly off the dock was red brick and lit by tall wrought-iron lanterns that always made Gray feel like he was back in historical London. A little piece of him expected to see horse-drawn carriages waiting in the small lot leading out of the marina.
“The restaurant isn’t far from here,” Gray said, walking close enough that their shoulders brushed.
“This is beautiful. It’s so bright,” Charlie said, looking around. “And so quiet.”
The Lux was short for Luxury and the island lived up to its name.
Smaller than Smile, it was mostly a retirement spot for the wealthy but, in recent years, had become somewhat of a tourist hub.
Grayson figured it was because a lot of the retirees got restless and decided to rent out their properties.
“There are no cars on this island. The marina we used is for visitors. There’s a larger one on the other side of the island for residents and people here for vacation.”
“It must be so strange to never have traffic,” she said, taking everything in with a sweet, almost innocent enthusiasm.
“Do you live in a busy area of LA?”
People were out, strolling along the cobblestone streets, laughing and chatting, enjoying the warm summer night. A group of teens were crowded around the Ice Cream Hut. It reminded Gray of when he was younger, summers in Smile.
“It’s not downtown LA, so it’s not terrible, but yeah, for sure. I often leave my bedroom window open and listen to the cars and the sounds of the city to fall asleep.”
Gray took her hand, pleased when her fingers immediately curled around his. “How are you sleeping at Bernie’s? Definitely no traffic sounds there to soothe you.”
She laughed, leaned into his shoulder in a familiar way that made him crave more. Made him want to lean down and kiss her again.
“No. Bernie’s snoring helps a bit.”
Gray laughed, gesturing to the whitewashed brick building. The sign on top was cut from black wrought iron and hung from invisible wires, giving it an artistic feel.
Charlie glanced up with a smile. “Home.”
When she turned her head, still looking up, Gray’s chest muscles tightened. Leaning down, he pressed a soft kiss to her lips. The wistful look in her gaze when he pulled away felt dangerous.
Pushing that thought aside, he held the door open for Charlie. They were greeted by an older man with slicked-back gray hair and a bright purple bow tie, which stood out even more against the backdrop of his white dress shirt.
“Welcome to Home,” he said, with a hint of an accent that Gray couldn’t identify. “Do you have reservations?”