Chapter Twenty-Seven
Twenty-Seven
IF SHE LET HERSELF, CHARLIE could forget the reasons that brought her to Get Lost Lodge.
Of all the things she hoped and expected for this trip, getting to relax wasn’t on the list. The sun was shining overhead, smiling down on them with so much warmth, Charlie felt it in her bones.
Grayson, Beckett, Levi, Jilly, and Ollie had started up a game of what could only loosely be called baseball.
Bernie and Charlie had joined in—though she’d tried to decline, being honest about her lack of skills.
A few of the guests had decided it looked like fun, too, and Presley was taking videos and photos for their social media.
It was the most fun Charlie had had in a really long time.
Currently, the teams were split into Levi, Jilly, Ollie, Charlie, and one guest on one side and Beckett, Gray, Bernie, and two guests on the other.
As she stood at the makeshift home plate, holding the bat, she reminded herself that Ollie had hit a home run, so she could do this.
Her dad had taught her how to play guitar and read music and her mother had taught her how to look her best and tricks for memorizing, and between them, they’d both encouraged her to sing.
There’d been no bike rides or impromptu baseball games.
That had never bothered her but it made her realize how different all families were; what was standard in one didn’t always make it common.
“I’ll throw light and easy,” Gray said, smiling at her from the center of the grass.
He looked extra good today with a backward ball cap, a pair of athletic shorts, and a Get Lost Lodge T-shirt. His biceps strained, looking more impressive as he wound up.
She missed the first one. And the second one.
“Just bunt it,” Jilly called.
Charlie looked over at her where she stood at third base, waiting to come home.
“Should I know what that means?”
“Just make contact and run,” Beckett called.
When the bat hit the ball, it shocked her still for a full second before she remembered to run. The joy pumping through her system as she made it to first base was as surprising as hitting the ball in the first place.
Ollie cheered and did a funny little dance as she followed her mom home.
“All right, I’ve got enough time for one more inning, then I need to get started on dinner. Jilly is craving burgers,” Levi said.
“Your spaghetti was legendary, so I can only imagine how good your burgers will be,” Rain, one of the guests playing, said.
Levi went up to bat after kissing Jillian, to which Ollie said, “Ew.”
“Interesting you’re craving burgers,” Gray said, getting ready to pitch to Levi. “Last time you were pregnant, you couldn’t even handle the smell of meat.”
It was like his words registered in slow motion. Levi’s eyes widened, Presley lowered her phone, and Jilly started to laugh but then realized what her brother had just shared. Ollie stared at her mom, then Levi.
Gray muttered something under his breath and it was like they were all holding their breath to see if she picked up on it. From what Charlie had experienced so far, Ollie didn’t miss much.
“Why did Uncle Gray say last time you were pregnant?” Ollie asked her mom.
Jilly’s face paled and Levi immediately dropped the bat and walked over to them.
“Honey,” Jilly started.
“Are you having a baby? Is that why you get sick sometimes and why you don’t like peanut butter sandwiches anymore?”
Jilly nodded. Levi crouched down to Ollie’s level. “You’re going to be a big sister, kiddo.”
Ollie blinked rapidly. The guests seemed to back away slowly, kindly leaving the family to the somewhat awkward moment, and Charlie glanced at Bernie, feeling like they should do the same.
“You guys are having a baby?” Ollie asked her mom again.
Jilly nodded again. “We were going to tell you after Uncle Beck and Aunt Presley’s wedding.”
Ollie looked around at everyone watching and started shuffling backward slowly, putting distance between herself and the adults.
“I’m so sorry, guys. Ollie, that was my bad. I shouldn’t have said that like that,” Grayson said. The sadness in his voice tugged at Charlie’s heartstrings.
“How come everyone else knows?” Ollie asked quietly.
“Not everyone, sweetie. And we knew how excited you were about the wedding. We were just waiting so we didn’t take the focus off it,” Levi said, standing up.
“We’re really excited, honey. It’s going to be amazing to watch you be the best big sister ever,” Jilly said, closing the distance between herself and her daughter with deliberate slowness. “I’m sorry we didn’t tell you sooner.”
“You’ll be the baby’s dad,” Ollie said to Levi, her voice cracking.
Charlie could only imagine how the others felt because her own emotions felt like they were being scraped over jagged rocks. The sweet little girl who had so much joy and enthusiasm for everything seemed completely lost in this moment.
“I will,” Levi said slowly.
“We’ll be a family, Ollie,” Jilly said.
Ollie swiped at tears that slipped down her cheeks. “I thought we were already a family.” With that, she turned and ran. Jilly started to go after her, but Levi stopped her.
“She’s okay. Let her get some space,” he said.
“You guys, I’m so sorry. I feel like the biggest jerk,” Gray said.
Beckett clapped him on the shoulder. “Could have been any of us. I’ve almost done it a few times now because Presley and I are trying for a baby.”
“You are?” Jilly asked in a high-pitched voice.
Presley nodded and gave Jilly a hug. “We are. She’ll be okay. Just give her a few minutes.”
They were all doing their best to support everyone at once and not place blame, which truly impressed Charlie. Their love was so incredibly obvious; it was a living, breathing thing, and she had no doubt it was part of what made the place so successful.
People wanted to be in places that made them feel like they belonged, and somehow the Keller family did that for everyone they encountered.
“We can clean up the baseball stuff if you all need to check on Ollie,” Presley offered.
Jilly started, like she’d forgotten there were others around. “Oh. No. That’s okay.” She rubbed her hands together and glanced toward the side of the house where Ollie had gone.
“She’ll be okay. As long as she’s physically safe, she’s just processing,” Charlie said, trying to reassure her.
Jillian stared at her a moment before walking closer. “I feel like we mishandled that.”
Levi put his arm around Jillian’s shoulder. “No one gets it right all the time, babe. Come on, let’s go talk to her.”
“I feel so bad,” Gray said, watching them walk away.
“Like Becks said, it could have been any of us,” Presley said, squeezing Gray’s arm.
They gathered all of the equipment and Presley and Beckett took it back to the shed. Grayson gave her a sad smile. “I’m just going to check on the front desk.”
She wondered if he just needed a minute as she sat down on one of the stairs leading up to the deck.
Bernie joined her, exhaling loudly, like he’d been waiting to sit down. “Being a family is hard.”
Charlie nodded, staring out toward the water. “It is. Doesn’t matter how the family is formed or who it’s made up of, there’s always something to navigate or balance. Everyone brings something different to the table.”
She felt Bernie’s gaze before he spoke. “What do you bring to the table, Charlie? From your perspective.”
She inhaled, let it out. Interesting question. “Emotional strength for my mom. The ability to listen for my clients. Logic and an ability to map things out carefully.” She turned her head. “How about you?”
He gave a soft chuckle. “Usually a hearty appetite.”
Charlie laughed, appreciating his easy humor.
“I don’t know you well yet, Charlie, but I see you underestimate yourself.”
Her brows furrowed. “In what way?”
“You left out a lot of things. You also bring happiness, thoughtfulness, warmth, and a great deal of empathy. You’re funny and bright, and that draws people to you. Your father was like that from what I remember and what I read. He was happiest when he was making others happy with his music.”
She nodded, pursed her lips. “He was music. His laughter, his voice, the way he looked at you were all as moving as the lyrics he wrote. My mom was his muse, but he was her everything.”
Lifting a hand, he patted Charlie’s. “Not everything, Charlie. There was and still is room for more. You’re an extension of him, yes, but you’re also more than just your mom’s rock. She loves you. Wants your approval, probably every bit as much as you’ve wanted hers.”
“Maybe you should have been a therapist,” she said with a smile, hoping it covered the way her heart pinched.
Levi and Jilly came around the side of the lodge. Jilly was wiping away tears.
“Uh-oh,” Bernie said.
Jilly sniffled. Levi gave them a small wave. “She doesn’t want to talk to us. Maybe we should have told her sooner.”
“You do the best you can in the moment you’re in,” Bernie said, startling Charlie with how similar it was to her own philosophy.
“Will you talk to her, Charlie?” Jilly asked in a quiet voice.
Charlie’s eyes widened, her spine straightening. “Me? She doesn’t know me all that well.” She heard Grayson’s footsteps coming out of the lodge, onto the porch.
“No, but she likes you and you understand the emotional weight of this, being a counselor. Bernie said that in addition to teaching, you’d done some counseling.”
Bernie gave her a sheepish smile. That part didn’t need to be a secret, she supposed.
“I can try. If you’d like.”
“You don’t have to, Charlie. This is my screwup,” Grayson said, sounding so miserable, a fissure formed in her heart.
“It was an accident, Grayson. And she would have found out,” Charlie said, worried about the amount of guilt he was placing on himself.
“Might be that it’s easier to talk to you than any of them,” Bernie said. “Ollie’s very sensitive and thoughtful about the people she loves. She wouldn’t want to upset Jilly or Levi if she’s feeling mad or sad about the baby.”