17. CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
brENDEN
I almost trip up the stairs in my haste to get to my bedroom.
Travis is laughing behind me, but I’m not slowing down.
This is the first time he’s been the one to initiate fooling around, and let me tell you, I am here for it.
You’d think having his dick in my mouth this afternoon would’ve been enough to keep me satiated for more than twenty-four hours.
But apparently not.
Plus if I recall correctly—and seriously, as if I could forget—he promised me a blowjob.
Travis barely gets the bedroom door closed behind us before I’m stripping off my shirt and pants, leaving them in a messy heap on the floor.
He laughs again.
“Eager much?”
“Nope. Not at all,” I lie brazenly.
“Okay, good. Because I think I’m more tired than I thought. Maybe we should just get to sleep.” He lets out a long yawn as he stretches his arms behind him.
My mouth hangs open for a moment before I force myself to shut it, attempting to hide my disappointment.
I run my finger over the waistband of my boxer-briefs awkwardly.
“Oh. That’s fine.” When he cracks a smile, I suck in a breath.
“Wait, are you fucking with me?”
“Of course I’m fucking with you.”
“Well, that’s just rude.” I turn away from him, pretending to be offended.
He reaches for me before I can step away, his large hands wrapping around my upper arms and tugging me backward until my back hits his chest.
“Let me make it up to you,” he suggests, voice low and growly in my ear.
“Okay,” I say.
And I say it perfectly normally.
I absolutely do not squeak it.
His idea of making it up to me starts with his teeth grazing their way down the side of my neck and along the top of my shoulder.
When I sag into him, he splays a hand over my stomach.
It’s not exactly a dirty move, but the possessiveness of it sends a zing shooting up my spine.
He brushes his pinky down my happy trail and then dips it below my waistband.
I press my ass into his front, hoping to encourage him to go farther.
His other hand comes to the front of my hip, holding me tightly against him.
I’m tenting my underwear now and rocking upward trying to get contact on my dick, but he’s stubbornly refusing to grab it.
“You’re a liar,” I complain.
“You’re not making it up to me.”
“Not yet,” he says, sounding awfully smug.
“Then when? Because if you don’t hurry up and get on with it, I’m going to take matters into my own hands.”
To show him that by “matters” I mean myself, I reach for my dick.
But before I can wrap my hand around it, he grabs my wrist and carefully maneuvers my arm behind my back, trapping it between our bodies.
I whine and he lets go, his hand coming up to wrap loosely around my throat instead.
Despite being free to move my arm now, I don’t.
I don’t move at all.
His other hand is still pressed over my hip, and his fingers might as well be rope for how restrained I feel.
And I mean that in a good way.
A pretty fucking awesome way, actually.
Because he has my body flush against his and he clearly wants to keep me here.
I suppose I’ll survive a few more minutes without touching my dick.
Maybe.
Thirty seconds, at least.
Even though he’s not that much bigger than me, Travis maneuvers my body easily, like I’m his puppet.
He brings both of my arms up over my head and settles my hands on the nape of his neck.
I scratch my nails lightly through his hair as he continues to tease me with kisses to my neck and shoulders.
This time when I start a rocking motion, pushing my ass against him, he doesn’t stop me.
In fact, his grip on my hip tightens, but he uses it to guide my body back and forth.
He uses his other hand to take turns playing with my nipples until they harden and I lose my rhythm.
I’m squirming more than rocking now.
But I can feel his stiff length poking into my ass, so hopefully that means he’s ready to end this torture and move on to the main event.
I don’t even notice my hand has drifted out of his hair and down to my dick again.
Travis notices though.
And rather than grabbing my wrist this time, he responds with a hard bite to the top of my shoulder.
“Ow! Fucking hell,” I cry.
But even though it hurt, it also made my dick twitch in my hand.
Weird.
“Too much?” he asks, licking over the spot he just attacked.
I whip my head fiercely side to side.
If he wants to bite me, he can bite me.
Hell, I’ll let him do pretty much anything he wants at this point, as long as he puts my dick in his mouth before I explode.
Because I’d like to explode with my dick in his mouth, thank you very much.
With no warning, he squats down a bit, securing one arm behind my thighs, and then scoops me up bridal-style like I weigh nothing.
Wrapping my arms around his neck instinctually, I let him carry me the few steps to the bed.
Which he proceeds to toss me onto.
Before I have a chance to complain—not that I really would, because damn, that was hot —he’s on top of me, bracing his forearms on either side of my head, both caging me in and preventing all his weight from landing on me.
“Hi,” I say, a little lust-drunk at this point and fighting a dopey smile.
He answers me with a hard kiss, his tongue immediately demanding entrance to my mouth, which I have no problem granting him.
I can’t be only a passive receiver of the kiss though.
I give it back to him just as hard, digging my fingers in right below his shoulder blades to pull his body down closer on top of mine.
I never imagined I’d get to see this side of him—the confidently sexual side—but I love it.
And even though I know it’s only sex, nothing more, the knowledge that he wants me makes me feel like I’ve won some kind of prize.
Just like I intend on winning the May Games with him on Sunday.
I can’t believe he agreed to participate with me.
What’s the town going to think?
They won’t believe it either when they see him out there.
And he’s doing it for me .
Wait, no.
Not the time to get distracted.
Focus.
Focus on the way Travis’s hips are pressing mine into the mattress.
Focus on how he’s sucking on my bottom lip as he smoothly slides my underwear partway down my thighs, freeing my cock.
Focus on getting him undressed too, so I’ll be able to feel his skin on mine.
Yes.
That.
I gracelessly shove his flannel off his shoulders, while he laughs gently and helps me by sliding his arms out of the sleeves.
Then I work on tugging his T-shirt up over his chest and grunt when I can’t get it any farther.
He helps again, pulling it the rest of the way over his head and tossing both shirts to the floor beside the bed.
“Off,” I demand, fumbling with the button on his jeans.
He laughs again but obliges, though he chooses to get off the bed, standing up to remove the offending article.
As I quickly yank my underwear off my legs, I want to protest the loss of him, but then he’s standing there in only his boxers, which do nothing to hide his erection.
So really, no complaints here.
When he gets back on the bed, he lies down beside me and reaches for me, manhandling my body again until I’m the one on top.
I’m straddling his thick thighs, and I can’t help but roll my hips, making my hard cock slide against his.
I’ve all but forgotten the promise of a blowjob.
At this point, I’m so far gone that I’ll be satisfied with rutting against him until I get to come.
But then he scoots himself back so his head is propped up on the pillows.
He pulls me toward him, forcing me to knee-walk my way up the bed and up his body until I’m straddling his chest.
And then he says three words that almost undo me.
“Fuck my mouth.”
“Um, er, what?” I sputter.
“You heard me,” he says, voice low and sexy and doing things to my insides.
“Do you want to?”
I laugh nervously.
“What kind of question is that?” I mean, really.
Has any gay man in the history of ever actually said no when another man asks if he wants to fuck his mouth?
I don’t think so.
Travis’s lip quirks up.
“Then what are you waiting for?”
Well, shit.
The way he’s looking at me now, it almost feels like a challenge.
And there’s no way in hell I’m backing down.
Wrapping my hand around my base, I inch my hips forward so I can swipe my cockhead across his lips.
His tongue darts out to taste, and a full-body shiver runs through me.
I can’t wait any longer.
“Open,” I command, my voice husky.
And shit, who even was that?
Surely, it couldn’t be me talking like this.
When he drops his mouth open, eyes gazing at me with so much lust it scorches my skin, I lose all sense of decorum.
I thrust forward, sliding my cock along his tongue and not stopping until I hit resistance at the back of his throat.
Even though he gags a bit, he makes no move to get away from the invasion.
Not that he has anywhere to go, since I’ve pretty much got his head pinned to the pillows.
But I remind myself that he wanted it this way, and I keep going, thrusting in and out of the wet heat of his mouth, building up a rhythm.
The heat of his stare urges me on.
While my eyes are mostly focused on the sight of my cock disappearing between his lips, I’m pretty sure he hasn’t taken his molten eyes off my face.
Good.
I don’t want him to forget whose cock is owning his mouth like this.
I know I can’t keep him, that this arrangement is only temporary, but that doesn’t stop me from doing my best to lay a claim right now.
I’m thinking with the wrong head, the head that’s nudging itself farther down Travis’s throat.
But so what?
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to paint my name in cum across his tongue.
Or maybe across his face.
Across his chest?
I can’t decide.
But if I don’t slow down, the choice will be made for me, and I’ll spill so far down his throat he won’t even taste me.
My toes are curling by his sides and fuck .
This is Travis fucking Reed underneath me.
Hot, grumbly man of more complaints than smiles.
The guy who swooped in to help me when I desperately needed it, like a knight in fucking flannel.
My fingers are threaded into his hair, holding him in place.
My Travis.
Mine, mine, mine.
I don’t even realize I’ve shoved my cock all the way down his throat and kept it there too long, not letting him breathe, until his hands grasp my hips and squeeze tightly.
I immediately pull out of his mouth, and he coughs and gasps for air.
Before I can apologize, his eyes spark with a challenge again and he says, “Is that all you’ve got?”
His voice is raspy from the way I was using his throat, and holy hell, I’m not sure either of us is going to survive this.
I slide into his mouth again, attacking it with punishing thrusts, but I make sure to pull back out after a few so he can catch his breath.
“That’s it, baby,” he says.
“Make me choke on it.”
Fuckfuckfuckfuuuuuck.
There’s no way I’m going to last much longer.
I continue to use his mouth, tugging on his hair as I barrel wildly toward my climax.
My entire body tenses, and then I pull out right before I shoot, letting my cum land sloppily on his lips and cheek.
It’s not quite my name, but I can almost see it there anyway.
His thumbs trace soothing circles over my hips as we both work to calm our breathing.
My legs refuse to hold me up any longer, but I manage to fall over to the side of Travis, rather than sitting on his chest and crushing him.
He reaches for me, tugging me back in closer, and we lie there in a tangle of limbs.
Then, slowly, I regain control of my brain and body.
I look at Travis’s face covered in my cum and realize, regretfully, that I should help clean him off.
“Hold on,” I say, getting up and making my way to the ensuite.
I grab a washcloth and dampen it with warm water before going back to him.
As I rest one knee on the bed and lean over him to wipe the mess from his cheek, I notice most of it is gone from his lips.
I’m pretty sure he licked it off, and that thought sends another flare of possessiveness through me.
Which, now that my mind isn’t clouded with lust, I realize is crazy.
We may be having explosive hookups, but Travis isn’t mine.
And I need to remember that.
But damn, he makes it hard when he smiles lazily at me and encourages me to lie back down with him.
I snuggle up against his side, throwing one leg over his and resting my head on his chest.
His arm winds around my back, holding me to him.
We’re both quiet for a couple minutes, and I could easily fall asleep like this, but then he speaks up.
“How do you really feel about May not doing the games with you? Are you okay?”
Ugh.
Way to ruin the afterglow.
I should say yes, because how selfish would it be to admit I want my daughter all to myself?
I want to remain her best friend forever, the most important person in her world.
And I know that’s unfair.
Sighing, I say, “It’s fine. As long as she’s happy, I’ll be happy.” Which is true enough.
But my orgasm must have drained all of the pretense out of me, because I can’t completely hide the sting of her decision.
“It just sucks to feel like I’m being replaced.”
“You’re definitely not being replaced,” Travis says.
“I know that rationally,” I tell him.
“But I’ve never really had to share May with anyone else before. I know it’s a good thing though. She deserves to have her grandparents in her life. She deserves more family to love her.”
I don’t ever want her to feel as alone as I have after losing so many people close to me.
Travis runs his hand up my spine and cups the back of my head.
“You deserve that too. Family. People to love you.”
“I have May.” My daughter loves me, and that should be enough.
There’s no need for me to be getting choked up here, but I am, and I hate it.
“You have other people too, you know,” he says gently.
“Family doesn’t have to be blood. You have so many friends in this town, people who care about you.”
I close my eyes, holding back tears.
I might have a lot of friends, but it’s not the same thing.
I’ve never had another friend like April.
And maybe it’s my own fault.
After everything I’ve been through, I have a tendency to not let people in all the way, not let anyone else get too close.
Because I don’t think I could survive losing someone else I care about that much.
“And you have Elise and Grant just as much as May does,” Travis adds, unintentionally twisting the knife deeper.
“No, I don’t.”
“I think you do,” he argues.
“Even if you don’t realize it or can’t accept it yet.”
I want to ask him what he would know about it, but I need to put an end to this conversation.
We’re supposed to be basking in the post-orgasm bliss, not poking at old wounds.
Actually, I’m the only one who’s gotten off.
And I should remedy that.
Banishing all the sad thoughts from my brain, I prop myself up on my elbow.
“The only thing I can’t accept is the fact that you haven’t covered me in your cum yet.”
That gets me a small laugh.
Then Travis studies me, and I do my best to project a happy image.
Honestly, I’m a grown ass man, and May wanting to do something with her grandmother instead of me for the first time is not the end of the world.
It’s really not.
Especially not when I’m lying here with Travis in my bed after he made me feel so good that I saw stars.
I want to make him feel that good too.
I need to.
He must read this desire on my face, because he lets me maneuver my way out of the depressing conversation and onto my back.
He strips off his boxers, tossing them aside, before crawling on top of me.
We kiss, slowly at first, then eventually building back up to a frenzy.
He’s hard again, his cock nudging into the crease between my groin and thigh, smearing precum along its path.
“Do you have lube?” he asks.
I stretch my arm out, and he lifts off me so I can roll onto my side to grab it from the drawer in my nightstand.
He takes it from me, then finishes rolling me over until I’m lying on my stomach.
I’m confused for a moment, but I let him do his thing, listening to the cap opening and the lube squirting out.
I hear him slicking himself up, and then his big, capable hands part my ass cheeks before his hard, wet length slides up between them.
Oh.
Yeah, I can totally get on board with this.
I lie still, letting him take what he needs from my body.
After a few moments of this, it starts to send me into a blissful haze.
When he slides lower, his cockhead bumping gently behind my balls, a pleased sound escapes me.
His breathing has picked up, and he’s letting out small grunts and moans, rutting against me now.
“Cross your legs at the ankles,” he orders.
And yup, uh-huh, okay .
Anything he wants.
I do as he says, then crane my neck to watch him as he slicks himself up again before pushing his cock between my thighs.
I tighten them around him, making him groan.
“ Ngh. Fuck yeah, just like that.”
He keeps fucking my thighs, rubbing along my taint with each thrust.
I’m growing hard again, but it doesn’t matter.
This isn’t about me.
This is all about Travis and the pleasure I can give him.
His rhythm eventually becomes erratic, signaling he’s close.
Then he moans, loud enough to make me remember the guests sleeping down the hall.
But before I can urge him to be quiet, he releases, leaving a warm mess dripping between my thighs.
He collapses on top of me, draping his chest over my back, his breathing still harsh.
I’m pretty sure some of his cum smears into my ass cheek.
It takes him a minute before he rolls off me.
This time I think we’re both too spent to clean up properly.
He swipes at me half-heartedly with the dirty washcloth and then throws it to the floor.
Then he positions us so we’re spooning, him behind me with one strong arm wrapped around my waist.
Sleep threatens to overtake me.
But before I succumb, I think about how Travis has already told me I can count on him whenever I need anything.
Now he’s reminding me that I have people in this town who care about me.
And with the way he’s holding me tightly against him.
.
.
I don’t think he’s talking about Mitch or Mrs.
Morris or Sal the mailman.
I can’t read too much into this though.
We can mix friendship and sex, but that doesn’t mean we could ever have anything more.
What I want from him is becoming increasingly confusing, but I know that he doesn’t want more than this.
So I can’t let myself want it either.
It’s like that sad song Elphaba sings in Wicked .
You shouldn’t wish for something that’s out of your reach, because that way, you can’t be disappointed when you don’t get it.
I mean, sure, she also sings about defying gravity, but I’m not about to try flying, okay?
I need to keep my feet on the ground and my head in reality.