PRESENT - CIARA
J esus, he’s looking at me like he wants to eat me alive. And I want him to. Again and again.
I turn on my heel, cursing my flushing cheeks as I walk back toward his room. I can hear him behind me, padding down the hall, no doubt thinking about last night. I can’t stop thinking about last night. He fucked me four times, and each time was better than the last. His body, his mouth, his hands, everything about him had me drowning in my own fucking pleasure. He made me feel, and god, it’s been so long since I’ve felt anything.
When we step into his room, I try to keep my eyes off his body—his ripped, large, tattooed body that is all I can see right now. Lazily, my gaze slides down over his hard chest and taut abs. I stop at his cock straining in his loose boxers and shit, I want to get on my knees and suck him until he’s growling my name and coming, hot and hard, in my mouth. I step forward, not even realizing I’m moving until I am just about flush against him. His eyes grow hooded as he looks over me. Damn, just damn . I stretch my fingers out, grazing them over his chest.
“Babe, I would love to be buried in you right now, but there’s no fuckin’ way I’m putting my cock inside you again. I’ll leave you raw and not fuckin’ walkin’.”
I don’t care.
I want to be raw.
“Don’t care,” I whisper.
“I care,” he says, gripping my chin and tilting my face up. “And you gotta go to work.”
This is it. He’s going to send me on my way with a poor excuse as to why he can’t continue seeing me. My eyes burn and I turn my face away, ashamed that yet again, I’m going to have to walk away from him. I spin, not wanting him to see the tears glistening in my eyes.
“Hey,” he says, his voice rough. “What the fuck?”
I don’t look back, I just lean down and grip my purse. “I get it,” I say. ‘If you want me to leave, Spike, just say so. I didn’t expect anything more from you.”
Silence.
I slowly turn to see him staring at me, arms crossed, body rigid. “That all you fuckin’ think of me, huh? You think I’m just goin’ to fuck you and get rid of you?”
Wait. What?
“Aren’t you?” I say, my voice small.
“Nah, I fuckin’ wasn’t. I was savin’ your sweet ass, because if I shoved my cock inside you once more, you’d tear in fuckin’ two. Don’t mean I don’t wanna fuck you again, ‘cause it’s all I can fuckin’ think about. As usual though, you fuckin’ decide you know me better than I know myself and jump to conclusions before I get a chance to speak.”
Shit.
“I...”
“Get your fuckin’ ass over here.”
“But...”
His eyes grow heated. “Don’t fuckin’ argue, Ciara. Get in front of me. Now.”
“I didn’t mean to...”
“Ciara,” he growls. “Here. Now.”
Slowly, I begin walking toward him. I stop in front of his large, powerful form and peer up at him through a curtain of hair that has fallen over my eyes. He tangles his fingers in that hair, and moves it aside so our eyes are connected.
“You’ve had a lot to fuckin’ say to me over the past few weeks, and you’ve hardly let me get a fuckin’ word in. I’m goin’ to get my word in now. The past was fucked up, but the good thing about the past is that’s just what it is...it’s over, it’s finished.
“I made a lot of fuckin’ mistakes. One of those was never tellin’ you how I felt. You’re a stubborn, bull-headed woman and you can’t seem to take no for an answer, and it drives me fuckin’ bat shit crazy - but I can’t get enough of you. I don’t want to turn you away, even though I know it’s the best fuckin’ thing for you. Ain’t my place to choose who you fuckin’ love, and it sure as shit ain’t my place to decide how you see me.
“I can’t give you sweet things, and I can’t promise you nothin’. I’ve got a dangerous life, and until that life is sorted, I ain’t takin’ you as my Old Lady. I am gonna take you though, every fuckin’ night and day, ‘cause you belong in my bed.
“Now, you get a choice here. You can turn and walk out that door and let me go for good, or you can hang onto me, knowin’ that right now I can’t give you everything you want, but knowin’ that one day, that might change.”
Oh god. Those words, they’re what I’ve needed for so long. They’re everything I’ve been waiting for. I know Spike can’t promise me things, and I know right now I can’t be a great deal more than a good time, but fuck, I’m his good time and that’s fine by me. I throw myself at him, slamming into his body and sending us both stumbling backwards. With a grunt, he wraps his arms around me and pulls me close, crushing our bodies together until I can hardly breathe, but oh, I don’t care. I reach up, gripping his face and bringing his lips down over mine. He kisses me with need. With want. With desperation. With everything we want to say, but can’t.
“That a fuckin’ yes?” he growls, wrenching his lips from mine.
“It’s a fuckin’ yes.”
He chuckles, and leans down close again. “You little fuckin’ ripper.”
Damn.
Just damn .