Chapter 4
R o e m y
“Roe, wake up.” I felt someone shaking my shoulder, but their voice sounded far away and muffled like I was underwater. I felt heavy, like my body was made of lead. “Roemy.”
The shaking grew harder, and I forced my eyes open, everything slowly coming into focus.
My living room, the cream colored sectional, the glass coffee table with my empty wine glass.
The TV playing some cooking show on mute.
I glanced around slowly, feeling confused, and then my eyes landed on Regis.
He was standing over me, his hand on my shoulder, looking down at me with his face contorted. I blinked and looked around my living room once more. My laptop was beside me with the screen dark, evidence that I’d fallen asleep while writing. Again. “You alright?” he asked.
I sat up slowly, my mind still foggy. I could still feel Case’s hands on my body, hear his voice in my ear, and taste him on my tongue. It all felt so real, so vivid, and so intense. But I wasn’t with him. I was still home in Arbor Hills in my living room. It was a dream. All of it was a dream.
“Roe?” Regis questioned again. “You good?”
I rubbed my eyes and nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, uh… I’m fine. I just… must’ve fallen asleep.”
He laughed and sat down next to me. “You were moaning loud as hell in your sleep. I thought something was wrong, but then I realized you were probably dreaming about whatever book you’re working on. Must be a good one.”
My face got hot. I was moaning? Out loud? I cleared my throat and closed my laptop, setting it on the coffee table. “Yeah. I guess so.”
“What you thinking for food? Are you cooking and should I pick something up?” he asked and I just stared at him.
I thought about the last three years. The off and on bullshit.
The nights he’d come over, we’d have sex that lasted all of fifteen minutes, and then he’d plug in his PlayStation.
I thought about how small his dick was, how he’d only made my cum a few times.
I thought how he never kissed me like he meant it or looked at me like I was something special.
I thought about the conversations that never went deeper than somebody’s social media drama, a new movie on Netflix or what takeout place we were ordering from.
I thought about the fact that I’d been so sick of the dating pool in Arbor Hills that I’d been settling for whatever this was between Regis and me.
The fact that I’d been okay with all of this turned my stomach.
I thought about the dream with Case and the way he’d looked at me like I was the only woman in the world.
I thought about the way he’d touched me like my body was something sacred and how he made me feel alive in a way I hadn’t felt in years.
And I realized something. The dream wasn’t just a fantasy.
It was my soul telling me what I deserved.
“Regis, when was the last time we had a real conversation?” I asked.
He scoffed, then frowned. “What?”
“When was the last time we had a real conversation? You know, about something that matters. Our lives, our dreams, and what we want. Shit. When’s the last time you genuinely showed interest in my books?”
He looked confused. “Roemy, you tell me about your books all the time.”
“But do you ask?”
“I don’t get…”
“Regis, we talk about food and TV shows and whether or not you’re coming over. That’s not talking. That’s just existing next to each other off and on for the last three years.”
“Where’s this shit coming from, Roe?” He sat up straighter, his tone shifting. “You just woke up from a nap and decided to trip?”
“I’m not tripping,” I snapped, standing up. “I guess I’m just tired.”
“Tired of what? You just woke up. You were asleep for a minute while I was in the room on the game.”
“I’m tired of this, Regis.” I gestured between us. “Whatever this is. I’m tired of settling for something that doesn’t make me feel anything.”
He laughed defensively. “Settling? Roemy, I’m a good man. I spend time with you when I can. What more do you want?”
“Affection, real connection, and conversations that make me think. I want passion. I wanna feel something when a man touches me. I wanna feel like a man actually sees me, and doesn’t just see dollar signs and convenience.”
“You’re really on some other shit right now.” He shook his head. “I got women who would love to be around me.”
“Then go be with them.” I folded my arms across my chest. “I’m done with this.”
“Done?” Regis laughed again. “You’re not serious.”
“Oh, I am. I want my key back.”
His face changed as his smile dropped. “You’re really doing this right now? We were about to have a good time before you left for your book conference in the morning.”
“Yeah, no. I want more than what you can give me and I’m not wasting any more time pretending I don’t.”
“Roemy, come on. You’re stressed about this keynote thing and you’re in your head about shit. Let’s just eat and relax, and we can talk about this when you get back.”
“No! There’s nothing to talk about. My mind is made up.”
Regis stood up, his jaw tight. “So what, you think you’re gonna find somebody better? Somebody who’s gonna deal with your schedule and all the time you spend writing those little books?”
“Those little books?” I scoffed, shaking my head. “Those little books are my career. Those little books provide me with a lifestyle that you love being attached to. They’re what I’m passionate about and the fact that you just called them that tells me everything I need to know.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.” He stood up, reaching for my hand, but I slapped it away.
“Yes, you did. You’ve never respected what I do. You’ve never read anything I’ve written or shown any interest in what matters most to me except when it benefits you.”
“Because it’s not real!” he snapped. “You write about sex and fantasies and shit that doesn’t exist. That’s not real life, Roemy. Real life is me coming over here, spending time with you, and being here when you need me.”
“Please! You’re here when it’s convenient for you. And you know what? I know you’ve had women over here when I’m gone.”
His face went blank. “What?”
“Don’t play dumb. I’m not in the mood, Regis.”
“If I did, it’s because of how you treat me,” he shot back. “You’re always in your head, always writing, always distant. What the fuck am I supposed to do?”
“You’re supposed to leave and take your shit with you.”
“Roe.”
“Leave, Regis.”
He stared at me for a long moment. I could see him trying to figure out if I was serious or if I would back down.
“Fine,” he huffed, storming away from me.
A few moments later, he came out of my bedroom holding his PlayStation like it was precious.
“I’ll get my shit when you get back from your book conference. If that’s cool with you.”
“I’ll box everything else up and leave it with the doorman. Leave the key, please.”
He pulled the key off his ring and tossed it onto the coffee table. “You’re gonna regret this.”
“I doubt it.” He looked at me one more time, shook his head, and walked out.
The door closed behind him, and I stood there in the silence, my heart pounding, my hands shaking. But I didn’t feel sadness or regret. I felt free. Exhaling a deep breath, I sat back down on the couch and picked up my phone from the coffee table.
There was a text from my cousin Shamari asking if I’d seen Case Wilson’s latest social media post. My heart beat wildly as I opened my social media app. The first post to load, just like in my dream, was Case’s.
I stared at the picture. At his face. At the confidence in his eyes.
At the way he looked like he knew exactly what he wanted and wasn’t afraid to go after it.
This was similar to my dream, making my body feel hot.
My pulse kicked up as I boldly liked the post. I’d never liked any of his posts until that moment. I just lurked and admired.
A few seconds later, a notification popped up. A DM from Case Wilson. “Oh, my God. Is this really happening?” I asked myself, tapping on the message.
I read it twice as I hearted it without a reply. My heart was racing and my hands were shaking so badly. I mean, this was Mr. Erotica himself. I could feel the heat spreading through my chest, down my stomach, and between my thighs. I just knew my pussy smiled just like I did.
I immediately pulled up my call log and called Shamari. “Girl,” I squealed as soon as she answered.
“Biiiitch! Did you see it?”
“I saw it… and he just DM’d me.”
“What?! What did he say?”
“That he’s looking forward to connecting this weekend and we should make it special.” I fanned myself as I walked into my kitchen for a bottle of water.
Shamari screamed so loud I had to pull the phone away from my ear. “Roe! This is it! This is your moment !”
I laughed. “You think so?” I looked at Case’s message again just as he wrote back and said something about his wildest dreams about to come true.
Oh, my God. Did he have a similar freaky ass dream? That could explain why everything felt like one of my dual POV novels. Damn. Maybe he’d been dreaming at the same time as me. Is that even possible? Am I losing my mind? Is this shit really about to happen?
I felt that same electricity I’d felt in the dream as I hearted the second message from Case. I felt that same pull as my pussy throbbed. Yeah, me and my favorite author were about to have a time. That was for certain.