Chapter 27
Twenty-Seven
Zoey
I pull out my chair and sit down, forcing myself not to look at his office because I know he’s still staring at me. My leg moves up and down with all the nerves going through me. When I got paged to go to the front, I thought it was for Nash to ask me what I wanted for lunch. What I wasn’t expecting was the big, beautiful flower bouquet. I looked over at Nash, thinking he sent it to me, but when I opened the card and read the words, I wanted to take the flowers and throw them across the room.
I was standing in front of Lulu, who thought Nash sent me the flowers. I was so embarrassed I wanted the earth to eat me up, and then he asked the loaded question. Who sent me the flowers? I should have lied and said it was my parents. I should have told myself I did nothing wrong, and it wasn’t my fault. But I felt like people would doubt me, or us for that matter. What married woman gets flowers from her ex-boyfriend? Or better yet, what married woman wanted to get flowers from her ex-boyfriend? I can tell you I’m not that person. I knew Nash was angry about it. I could feel the tension in the air after Lulu excused herself to not be in the middle of our argument.
I should have taken the time to calm down, but instead, I was pushed over the edge. Already feeling the way I felt, Nash’s tone sounded accusatory or at least that is what I thought it sounded like. So instead of making a joke of it, I threw last night in his face and even the shit with Kailyn. The minute the words came out of my mouth, I knew they shocked him. He looked like a deer in the headlights.
I look back down at the white envelope in my hands, pulling the card out and reading the fucking words again.
Zoey,
I miss you so much, it’s hard to comprehend.
Let’s fix this.
J.
I rip the card in half and then in half again until it is in tiny little pieces. Should I text him and tell him it’s never going to happen? Probably. Should I call him and tell him to fuck off? Yes. Will I give him the time of day? No. Because he’s a non-factor to my day. If I call him or text him, he wins. He will get what he wants, which puts me right back where it did when we were dating, where he got what he wanted, and now I see that I didn’t. I kept giving and giving and got nothing back. So I was not going to give him another thought more than he deserved.
I don’t have any more time to think of things when I get a call from one of my clients. Which lasts more than two hours as we go through everything he wants to focus on in the next quarter. Only when I hang up the phone, I see Nash sent me a text.
Nash: Have to run an errand. Not sure what time I’ll be back. Let me know, and I’ll send a car for you.
I look over at his office door, seeing it open, and then look down to see it’s almost after four anyway. I try not to be pissed that he sent me a fucking text instead of coming to see me. But well, it doesn’t work. Instead, I open my Uber app and order my own car, packing up my stuff.
When I get a notification my ride is there in a minute, I grab my bag and head toward the door. “Good night, Lulu,” I say, smiling at her.
“See you tomorrow,” she replies, and I avoid looking at her eyes, wondering what the hell she must be thinking.
I get in the car and don’t even bother texting Nash back. I’m a grown-ass woman. I don’t need him to send a car for me. I sit in the back of the car stewing, which makes it even worse. Even getting into the house, I make my way upstairs and change out of my clothes, putting on shorts and a shirt. I avoid my phone the whole time. Instead, I go downstairs to watch television. I think about maybe calling Zara, but I’m not ready to let anyone in on what is going on, or better yet, what is not going on.
When six o’clock rolls around, and he’s not called nor texted, I’m past the point of being pissed. Like, what the actual fuck? I walk over to the kitchen and open the fridge. “He wants to play this game,” I say to myself, taking out the salmon we were going to eat for dinner. “He’s going to play this game by himself,” I mumble as I prepare the salmon, putting it in the oven before starting on the rice and then making a quick little salad. As the time ticks by, instead of me relaxing and going with it, I get angrier and angrier. I literally want to go upstairs, pack my shit, and take off, but that would be immature of me.
I’m taking the salmon out of the oven when I hear the front door slam, making me jump. I listen to his steps getting closer and closer to the kitchen. His face is hard and tight when he sees me. “You didn’t call me.” He puts his hands on his hips.
“I didn’t think I had to call you.” I place the salmon down, taking off the baking mitt. “I finished work and got a cab.” I try not to let my voice show how pissed I am. I have to wonder if I’m this pissed off because so many things haven’t been said out loud. Like, for example, how he’s feeling toward me. How do I feel toward him? I’m in love with him, but does he know this? Does he feel it? The elephant in the room is getting bigger and bigger, and it looks like neither of us is going to take the leap and bring it up.
“I waited and waited for you to call me.” He doesn’t move from where he is, which is weird, since every single time he comes into the house to find me, he comes right to me to kiss me. Today is not like that, and I have to wonder if today is the day everything changes. I notice he isn’t even wearing his suit jacket. Instead, his white dress shirt is rolled up to the elbows.
“Well, as you can see, I made it home.” I extend my hands beside me on the counter. “And I made dinner. Have you eaten already?”
His eyebrows push together at the question. “Of course not. Why would you think that?”
“I have no idea.” I shrug. “All I know is you went to run an errand at three, and it’s almost seven.”
“Yeah, and I’ve been on the road the whole time,” he retorts. “They called me, and I rushed out of there.”
“Who?” I ask, the curiosity getting the better of me as he holds up his finger, turning and walking back out of the house.
It doesn’t take him long to walk back out of the house, the door slamming, and then maybe a couple of seconds later it slams again. I walk around the counter toward the hallway and see him walking in, holding a little crate in his hand. “What is that?” I ask him. My heart speeds up a million miles a minute, and it feels like it’s going to come out of my chest.
“This is…” he says softly, opening the front of the cage and taking out the most beautiful kitten I’ve ever seen in my life. It’s all white, and he holds it gently against his chest. “Whatever you want to name her.” I look at the little ball in his hand, her blue eyes looking around as she shivers in his arms. “I ordered her the minute we got home, but she wasn’t ready until today. They called me at the last minute. I rushed over there to pick her up, but I had to go and get all the things she needed. It’s all in the car.”
“You got me a cat?” I whisper, my hands itching to hold her but standing here in shock. “A real cat?”
“Well, she’s not fake. I can tell you that.” He takes a couple of steps and holds the cat out for me. I gently take her in my arms and hold her like a baby as she looks up at me. “I’m going to go get the things out of the car.” He points at the door, turns, and walks out as the cat looks around at the house.
“You are the most beautiful little cat I’ve ever seen in my life,” I tell her as she squirms a little in my arms until I rub her head. “Like the most beautiful.”
I hear a thud and look to see he was not kidding. “I bought whatever they suggested,” he says. “I even got two cat trees that need to be put together.”
“Nash, you got me a cat.”
“Yeah,” he confirms as if it’s nothing. I’m trying not to freak out, but I’m looking at a cat I’m probably going to fall in love with. “You are always watching those cat videos, so I thought this would be perfect.”
“We should have perhaps spoken about this,” I start to say, and everything with today just snowballs. “Like what the fuck happens if this doesn’t work out, and now we have to figure out custody of the cat?” I ramble a bit.
He stands there confused. “Excuse me?” His head tilts to the side.
“After ninety days, we could be divorced,” I remind him, thinking I’m being honest with him about the situation. What happens if he gets bored with this life we are creating and suddenly wants his old life back? “What if you, or we, decide this isn’t what either of us wants?”
The minute I say the words, I see something flash on his face. His eyes change a different color, and his jaw gets tighter than I’ve ever seen it get before. I even see his shoulders slump just a bit as I take a step toward him. “Nash.” I say his name, not sure what else to say when his phone rings from his pocket.
He grabs his phone, and I blink away the tears in my eyes. “Hey,” he says, clearing his voice like something is in his throat. “Yeah, I have it right here. Give me a second,” he adds. “I have to take care of something that I was supposed to handle this afternoon before I had to leave.”
“Of course,” I say as I watch him walk away from me and head toward the office.
I look down at the cat, who now is really squirming to get out of my arms. “We should get your litter done, I think,” I murmur as I place her on her feet in the middle of the kitchen, and she looks around. “But I don’t know where to put it.” I suddenly feel uncomfortable being here. “Should we wait for Nash to see where he wants to set you up?” I put my hand on my stomach as I breathe in and out, and I sit down on the floor next to the cat. “What should we call you?” I ask her as I pet her, looking toward the office where I hear him talking. “I think I know what I want to call you,” I say softly. “Lovey-dovey.” My voice cracks as I look back down the hallway, hoping I didn’t ruin it.