chapter 25
“If I’d known what I was missing, I would’ve made more of the weeks we’ve already been here,” Charlotte teased Julian as he
lay exhausted in her arms. “That doesn’t happen to a girl every day.”
“Yeah, well, I think we’ve already established that you’ve been married to a selfish bastard.”
Charlotte had been so used to tolerating Cliff and his behavior—and trying to be the one to make up the difference—that she
hadn’t even realized how bad it’d gotten or how heavy that role had become.
“I don’t want to talk about Cliff.” She didn’t want to think about him, either. She couldn’t believe he’d defected and broken
her heart—or that, because of Julian, she was actually feeling better than she had before Cliff had asked for the divorce.
She could only hope whatever this was would last . . .
“No problem,” he responded. “As far as I’m concerned, we don’t have to talk at all.”
“You’re not going to get out of it that easily,” she said wryly. “What’s going on with you?” He’d wanted to tell her something while they were making love, but she’d been too afraid that whatever it was would make him stop touching her, like when he’d ended their kiss.
“Nothing,” he replied. “I’m tired. I just want to sleep.”
“Okay. I’ll go to my room.” She started to get up, but he caught her by the wrist.
“I meant with you.”
“That’s better,” she said with a laugh and checked the clock on the nightstand. They had a few hours before Sloane and Lilly
got up, so she climbed back into bed.
Once he was settled in her arms with his head on her shoulder, she combed her fingers through his hair. There was no way she’d
be able to sleep. She was too shocked by her own emotions. Shouldn’t she feel odd being with her best friend’s brother like
this?
She probably should. Until just a couple of months ago, she’d been with Cliff. And yet she didn’t feel odd. She felt as if she’d finally found her way home.
“Are you okay about . . . about what we did?” she asked. “I mean . . . we crossed a line I know you’ve been careful to stay
away from. You’ve been a lot better about it than me. But . . . I hope you don’t have any regrets.”
“I enjoyed every second of it,” he said.
Her breath settled. His weight felt right. “It won’t be easy to explain to Sloane.”
“No, it won’t.”
“Is that what you were going to say before when I . . . I told you not to screw it up?”
This time, he didn’t speak for several seconds. Then he said, “We’ll talk about it in the morning. Just . . . give me this
night.”
“No problem. But I don’t want you to worry. I know you think I’m on the rebound and don’t know what I’m doing, but that’s
not the case. Tonight meant something to me. You mean something to me.”
When he didn’t respond, she continued combing her fingers through his hair. She assumed he was falling asleep—until tears warmed her skin.
“Jules?” she said.
“Tomorrow,” he reminded her.
She didn’t know what to do. He’d asked for this night, and she’d agreed to give it to him, but . . . “I can’t stand it that
you’re feeling so bad.”
“Tomorrow,” he said again, more forcefully this time.
“Fine, I’ll wait,” she agreed. “But whatever it is, I promise it’s going to be okay.”
An hour later, when he was finally asleep, she slipped out of his room to find her own bed. But she was still so terrified about what he was going to
say when he finally explained himself that she couldn’t sleep.
She’d never seen Jules cry before. What could affect him that deeply?
Charlotte was anxious when she got dressed in the morning. She needed to get some writing done, but Jules had seemed so troubled
after they made love . . .
A knock sounded on her door while she was brushing her teeth. “Come in,” she managed to say around her toothbrush.
Lilly let herself in and came to stand beside her, where they could see each other in the bathroom mirror. “I want to call
Steve today. Would that be okay?”
After rinsing her mouth, Charlotte put her hair into a messy bun. “Of course. His contact is in your phone.”
“So I can call the States? It doesn’t cost money?”
“Nope. I put your phone on my contract and upgraded to a global plan while we’re here.”
“That’s awesome!” Her little jump of excitement made the extra five bucks a day well worth it.
“I’m sure he’ll be happy to hear from you. You should send him one of the pictures from our trip to the grotto. Just remember it’s seven hours earlier in Cherokee, so wait until noon, at least. He gets up early, but not in the middle of the night.”
“I will,” she said and was just about to leave when she peered at Charlotte a little more closely. “Are you okay?”
“Of course. Why do you ask?”
“You look tired.”
She was tired. She hadn’t gotten more than a couple hours sleep even after she’d returned to her bed. She’d had too much on her mind,
including memories of making love with Julian. That had been the best sex of her life; she was still excited about it. But
she had no way of knowing exactly how it would change their relationship. “I might have to take a nap later.”
“Are you going to write now?”
She was going to seek out Julian and finally put the questions inside her to rest. “After I eat,” she said, but when she got
downstairs, he was gone. Only Sloane was there, making breakfast.
Charlotte pulled her phone out of her pocket and texted him.
Coward.
Don’t be in such a hurry. How about we just screw around while we’re here? Have some fun and face reality when we go home?
Sloane must’ve heard her footsteps, because she looked back. “Who are you texting?”
“No one.” She didn’t want to admit she was texting Julian. Normally, that wouldn’t be a problem. But after last night? She
felt like she had to be careful. “Just reading all the messages Cliff sent me.”
“Are there a lot of them?”
“A ton! He’s freaking out.”
“That’s a little worrisome.”
“Why?”
“Because I’m afraid you’ll go back to him.”
“I’m not going back to him. There’s no way.” Not after last night. He’d never forgive her—even though she’d made it clear
she wasn’t interested in reconciling. “I’m not even tempted.”
Sloane seemed stunned by her confidence. “Whoa! You’ve come a long way.”
“Did you see Jules this morning?” Charlotte asked, trying not to act overly interested.
“Yeah. He was here until just a few minutes ago.”
The villa smelled like gardenias—someone had put some in a vase—and butter as she walked over to pour herself a cup of coffee.
“Where’d he go?”
“You know him—wherever his art takes him. Are you going to write?”
Charlotte cast a resentful glance at her laptop. She had to forget about everything else until she could get those sample
chapters turned in. “Yeah.”
“When you’re done for the day, let’s go to Atrani to see the Torre dello Ziro.”
“Atrani?”
“It’s another coastal town about twenty minutes from here.”
“Okay. What’s the Torre dello Ziro?”
“A watchtower. I know we’ve seen quite a few. But this one is behind the crumbling walls of the Duchy of Amalfi—which was
a major trading power in the Mediterranean during the Middle Ages. Should be picturesque.”
“Will Jules be going?”
“Said he would. He’s the one who suggested it.”
She thought about his last message: How about we just screw around while we’re here? Have some fun and face reality when we go home?
Maybe that was what he needed. Maybe she should back off—relax and give him more room to cope with whatever he was going through.
Patience had never been her strong suit, but she didn’t want to push him. They both needed time—time to allow for change. She had no idea how difficult Cliff would make their divorce. She was still struggling
to save her career. And now that she had Lilly in her life, she needed to be more cautious than she’d ever been before.
There was nothing wrong with slowing everything down. Yes, she was excited about Jules. But she had no idea if last night
would lead to anything. If happy for now meant happy forever. They were only at the very start of it.
She had to be careful not to let her expectations run away with her.
“Great, I’ll get my pages done,” she told Sloane. Then she carried her coffee to her laptop and replied to Julian’s last message.
Take all the time you need. I’m here when you’re ready to talk.
P.S. Last night was incredible—did that really happen???
Lilly curled her fingernails into her palms while waiting for the phone to ring. She’d just sent Steve a picture of the grotto
with a message saying she’d gone there with Charlotte, Sloane and Julian, so he had to know it was her. But maybe he wouldn’t
pick up. Maybe he didn’t want to be bothered by the daughter of a former girlfriend.
She nearly hung up. But then he answered.
“Hey, Lilly. How are you?”
The kindness in his voice was nearly enough to make her cry. “I’m . . . okay.”
“Are you having fun with your sister and her friends? It sure looks like it in that picture you just sent.”
Lilly was lying on her bed, where she’d been reading her book. Grabbing her extra pillow, she put it over her face in an attempt
to stem the emotion that was welling up inside her. “Yeah.”
“What’d you say?”
She removed the pillow so her voice wouldn’t be muffled. “I said yeah.”
“That picture was at a cave of some sort?”
“The Emerald Grotto. We went out on a boat.”
“What else have you been doing?”
“Shopping. Swimming. Sightseeing. Sloane’s been teaching me to cook. And Charlotte’s bought me a lot of new clothes.”
“That’s cool. Are you still doing your schoolwork?”
“Not right now. Charlotte said I didn’t have to worry about it, that I can start up again once we get home. She said all we
both have to focus on right now is healing.”
“And is that happening?” he asked.
She wasn’t sure why she was so shaky. She’d been feeling pretty good the past couple of weeks. “I think so. Sometimes . . .
sometimes I feel happier than before.”
“What about other times?”
“I just feel scared,” she admitted.
“About what?”
“About what’s going to happen after Italy, I guess.”