Chapter 19 #2
But when he’d stood on the deck alone, when he’d thought about her lying in her bed just down the passageway, about the way she’d looked at him all those nights under the stars, like she knew him, about the words she’d said to him on the beach tonight, he hadn’t been able to stay away.
And now… now he was back in his own cabin, and the night was gone, and there was nothing left to do but wait for morning.
He'd told her he was going to be okay.
But the truth was—he wasn’t sure.
He hoped he’d be. He knew what he was going to do, and he stood by it. But he had no idea how it would turn out. The line had been crossed. The email had been sent. The job he’d loved for so long, the career he’d built his life around… it might be gone by tomorrow night.
He'd worked with Malik for almost five years. The guy had been the very definition of a loyal friend and colleague. And Jules? She still sent half of every paycheck and tip she earned to her family on the island of Moorea. She needed this job. They both did. They were both from these islands, and they would both stay here long after Russ left. He hated the idea of letting them down, of walking away and leaving them to wonder what came next. But if this was the cost of owning what he’d done, so be it.
He’d led this boat the way he’d wanted to live his life—with honesty. Integrity. And even if the system couldn’t appreciate the nuance of how this had unfolded, even if it all ended badly for him, at least he’d lived by his values.
Because he did love her. He hadn’t told her, as much as he wanted to when she’d said the words, because it would just make things ten times harder when they had to part. But he loved her, and that had to count for something.
He shifted slightly on the mattress, eyes still fixed on the ceiling. He thought of the way Tessa had curled into him earlier, her breath warm against his chest, her voice soft as she told him she wouldn’t trade a second of it. That she didn’t regret any of it.
Neither did he.
There was peace in that—real peace. The most bittersweet kind. The most honest kind.
He closed his eyes finally, and the tension eased. His thoughts drifted to her laugh, the way she looked up at him under the moonlight, the quiet conviction in her voice when she said she would have waited.
Maybe someday… But not now.
Now he had to show her what kind of man he was—not with promises, but with actions.
He let out a slow, exhausted breath and let the waves rock the boat gently beneath him.
Sleep came slowly, but thankfully, it came.
The smell of pancakes, sausages, and brewed coffee wafted across the main deck like a siren call.
Tessa blinked against the soft morning light, taking the stairs from her cabin slowly, her damp hair still twisted up from a shower. The boat rocked gently beneath her feet—not quite still, not yet sailing. The last morning. The one she’d tried not to think too hard about .
Jenna and Avery were already at the table, both wearing sunglasses and nursing steaming mugs of coffee like their lives depended on it. Kyle and Drew sat around the table, half-lounging, half-dozing, as they waited for the food.
“Late night?” Tessa teased gently as she approached, wrapping her arms around herself in her blue hoodie.
“Ugh,” Avery groaned. “Way too late.”
Jenna chuckled into her coffee and shot Tessa a knowing grin. “Avery may have danced a little too much last night.”
“I don’t think it was the dancing…” said Tessa wryly. She laughed and slid into an empty seat, heart still a little heavy from the night before, but light enough to float through this moment. There would be time for everything else later. But not yet.
Jules, already in full crew mode, brought out a tray of stacked pancakes, her curls pulled into a neat ponytail today.
“These smell amazing,” Tessa said as Jules placed them on the table.
“Thanks,” Jules replied with a warm smile. “Last breakfast of the trip, figured I’d go big.”
“You going home after this, Jules?” Nate asked pleasantly, looking up as he sat down and reached for the syrup. Nate, somehow, looked like he hadn’t had a thing to drink last night. How did the guy stay so healthy?
Jules nodded. “Yep. I live in Raiatea, like Malik and Russ. Not too far from the marina, actually.”
Nate nodded. “Nice… ”
“Did you have fun last night, Jules?” Jenna asked with a grin. “You were definitely out there holding your own on the dance floor.”
Jules laughed. “Thanks. I did. It was a good night. Looked like you guys had fun, too?”
“And then some…” Drew nodded, not smiling, but squinting as he added a small mountain of sausages to his plate of pancakes.
Tessa grinned as she sipped her coffee, watching the way the crew moved around them with practiced ease. Malik and Russ entered the deck, chatting about docking times and wind speeds. Russ nodded and turned toward the breakfast table.
Their eyes met.
For a moment, the sounds around them fell away—just the two of them, a quiet understanding wrapped in a long look that stretched around the morning chatter.
He smiled. Not forced, not guarded—just a soft, genuine smile that reached his eyes.
“Hey,” he said as he came up behind her chair. “How’d you sleep?”
“Pretty well,” she said, returning his smile, remembering how he’d left in the early hours of the morning. “You?”
“I did,” he said simply, and their gazes held a little longer. No one else in the room seemed to notice, but to Tessa, it was like a string of electricity humming quietly between them. Their secret.
He moved on, heading toward the galley to grab something, and she let out a small breath.
Behind her, Marin emerged from the lower deck and whispered, “That look said more than breakfast ever could.”
Tessa elbowed her gently, trying to hide the grin that was taking over her face. “Shhh.”
Soon after, someone mentioned packing, and like a chain reaction, the rest of the group groaned in unison.
“Ugh, don’t say the P word yet,” Kyle said, eyes closing.
“No, we really need to,” Jenna admitted. “I want to take my time and not forget something. I swear, every time I leave a hotel, I leave a phone charger behind.”
“Same,” Avery agreed, standing with her plate. “I’m gonna head down and start now, before we get moving.”
Tessa lingered at the table a little longer, her thoughts drifting again to the soft sound of the waves, the weight of Russ’s arms around her in the quiet dark last night, and the kisses they hadn’t wanted to end. She wasn’t ready to leave, but she would. And she would carry this with her.
Every part of it.