Chapter Twenty-Four Sisters Are Better than Misters
I’m woken up way too early Thursday morning by a text. Miles is still muted, so I know it’s not him. I check my phone. It’s Sarina.
Sarina: I’m sorry. Cara told me what happened last night. Can we talk today? I want to apologize in person. And clear the air between us.
I don’t want to see my stepsister. I don’t want to see anyone who’s been contributing to all these lies. I want to stay with Zuri and eat that other cake for breakfast.
But… I’m not really mad at Sarina . I’m angry at Cara and Miles, but Sarina and I have never had a sister relationship.
There are a hell of a lot of things I’ve never told her about my life, so I can’t be mad at her for not telling me about hers.
To be honest, I feel bad for her. I’ve always had a mother who’s supportive of who I choose to date.
It would be so hard not to have that. And considering how not supportive Noureen has been about my preferences, I have no doubt Noureen wouldn’t love the fact that her daughter is dating Cara.
Sana: Okay. I’m free today. Where?
Sarina: I can come to you. How about that cute café near Cosmic?
I really don’t want to talk to her on Love Street. If we met at LoveBug, Julie or Ajit will come say hello, and Cara might come in for a coffee. Or Miles, for that matter.
Sana: No not there.
I text her the name of a new café on Gerrard that has an impressive tea selection and tell her I’ll be there at ten.
The café is pretty empty when I walk in right at ten, which kind of makes sense since it’s a Thursday and most people are probably at work.
I see Sarina at the back at a secluded table, and she waves.
I nod, then get myself a London Fog, which is basically an Earl Grey latte with vanilla, before joining her at the table.
Sarina has a mug in front of her, along with a little teapot with an infuser. She smiles, and the expression looks a bit forced. I sit on the plush red seat at her table.
“Hi, Sana. Thank you so much for agreeing to talk to me.”
“No problem.” I’m not exactly glaring at her, but I’m not smiling.
She looks down at the table, running her hand over the rim of her mug.
“I wanted to apologize… Cara told me you were mad at her. I’m so sorry I asked her to lie to you.
It’s totally on me. Don’t be mad at Cara.
Or Miles. Cara said I could trust you, but I was…
” She looks at me. “I just… I made a mess of everything.”
Her voice cracks, then her shoulders slump, showing me just how dejected she feels.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen Sarina like this.
She’s usually so calm and steady. But then again, I don’t really know my stepsister that well.
She still looks pretty, in a pale pink loose V-neck T-shirt, light jeans, and minimal makeup.
“You were afraid I would tell your mother that you’re dating my friend,” I say. My voice sounds flat.
She nods.
I shake my head. “I’m… Honestly, Sarina, that hurts. I know we haven’t exactly ever been close, but how could you think I would do that?” I mean, Sarina knows I’m pansexual. Why would she think I wouldn’t support her? I would never, ever out someone like that.
She exhales. “I was… I was scared. And… my mother always said that you would be…”
“Your mother said what?”
She looks at me with wide eyes. “My mother says you’re jealous of me, and I shouldn’t trust you. She says you want my life.”
I raise a brow. Yeah, at times I get a little bitter about how perfect Sarina seems, but I have never wanted her life.
“I don’t think that about you anymore,” she says quickly. “I know I was a brat when we were kids. I’m sorry for that, too.”
I shrug. “I wasn’t exactly an angel child, either.”
“I realized my mother’s wrong about a lot of things when I started uni. Seriously, she messed me up so much. But she’s still my mom. I know she means well—she just doesn’t understand things outside her bubble.”
I want to say that Noureen most definitely does not mean well. She’s never been anything but judgmental to me and Mom. She took away the chance for me to have a relationship with my father. And my stepsister.
This is messy. Trying to build a relationship with someone whose mother caused my family so much pain is probably not a great idea.
Sarina’s right; Noureen is still her mom.
Sarina may have realized how wrong Noureen is, but I doubt Noureen ever will.
But Sarina’s eyes look so sad. It feels like this has been weighing on her for a long time.
I can’t imagine how hard it has been for her to have to keep her true self from her own mother.
I still say nothing, so Sarina keeps talking. “But now… I don’t know. I see things differently now. I know you’re not… my enemy.”
“Then why didn’t you let Cara or Miles tell me the truth?”
She looks down at her teapot and shrugs. “I should have. We were going to tell you at the festival. I… I was scared.”
I look at her. She’s never looked so… normal to me. Not the perfect or serene Sarina, just a regular girl who grew up kind of sheltered and who doesn’t want to disappoint her mother.
Sarina has never been anywhere close to my favorite person.
Inviting her to High Park that day was so hard for me—I really didn’t want to do it.
I was so insecure and sure that everyone would be wowed by her perfection that they wouldn’t notice me.
Actually, now that I think about it, it was Cara who pushed me to ask Sarina to come.
But that was the first time I ever tried to build a relationship with Sarina.
And she was so sweet and friendly that day.
She said nothing passive-aggressive like her mother would have, and she got along fine with my friends.
And then, the moment I heard that she hit it off with Miles on their ride home, I grew bitter about her again and decided not to contact her.
Partially because I really wanted Miles for myself, but also, I was uncomfortable with the idea of perfect Sarina in my circle of friends.
I thought she’d look down on me like her mother does.
I thought she’d talk to Miles about me the way her mother talks about me.
Despite Sarina not doing anything like that since we were kids, I didn’t trust her or really give her a chance, either.
“I get it. I… I haven’t done a good job making you feel like you could trust me. I mean, I was also judgmental of you,” I say. “I was so sure you spent that whole Uber ride with Miles complaining about me. I guess I was influenced by your mom too. I’m sorry.”
She looks up at me, a small smile on her face. “So… we’re okay?”
I nod. “I mean… I think we’ll be okay. I was…
am upset that no one told me what was going on, but I get why.
And I’m not upset that you’re with Cara.
It’s hard to wrap my head around it because I’ve known you both separately for so long, but you two could be cute together. Especially compared to her and Hannah.”
Sarina scowls at that. “Yeah. Hannah’s not… nice. So we have your blessing?”
“You don’t really need it, but yeah, you have it.
And I won’t tell your mother. Or my dad.
” I’m still a little annoyed at Cara, but Sarina is clearly so terrified of her mother that I can’t blame her for not wanting to tell me.
“Anyway, I think this news would have been easier for me to accept if I hadn’t also just found out that my mother, my father, and Miles have been lying to me about something else. ”
She gives me a confused look. Can I tell Sarina what happened?
I don’t like airing all this dirty laundry—about my mother’s business not doing well and about my own boyfriend not telling me about his new job, but I kind of trust Sarina now.
I feel like I can tell her these things.
And weirdly I want to. I tell her everything that happened yesterday.
Sarina is clearly shocked and upset on my behalf. “Can’t your dad stop this?” she asks. “I mean, if he’s the one brokering the sale, can’t he, like, cancel the deal?”
“Even if he could, as if Dad would do that for me. Plus, my mom wants to sell.”
“Yeah, but your street is so cool! There must be a way she could keep the building and… I don’t know. Rent out the space? You could ask your dad for ideas. He’s pretty understanding.”
I exhale. It’s so weird, and wrong, that Sarina has a better relationship with my father than I do. But that isn’t her fault either.
And there’s another layer to all this. Miles. “Did you know that Miles never told me Dad referred him for jobs?”
Sarina shakes her head. “I had no idea it was some big secret. Miles only met your dad that one time after the cherry blossoms, as far as I know.”
“Do you think Miles knew that the job was with the same developers who bought Mom’s building? It seems like too much of a coincidence.”
She shakes her head. “I don’t think Miles is capable of being two-faced like that.
He’s so great. I was a mess in that Uber ride.
I was so upset and embarrassed, and he was so gentle and kind.
He’s been a great friend since then. Honestly, Sana, he’s nuts about you.
I think…” She hesitates. “It was actually Miles who really made me see you differently. In the car I said you were a bit of a flake, and he defended you so… vehemently. He said it was sexist to think someone is less intelligent because they care about clothes, or makeup, or aesthetics. He’s the one who made me realize just how wrong I was about you. I wish I had before.”