Chapter 48
Chapter Forty-Eight
ECHO
“ H ave you ever done something you’re so incredibly ashamed of that dying sounds better than having to face those you love, knowing you hurt them? I did.” His voice begins to crack, and I wonder how I’m going to make it out of this room without crying. “I know everyone in this room knows what happened, but you haven’t heard it from me.”
Listening to Brian recount everything is painful. He goes back to being overseas and piecing together who Dustin was and how it triggered something in him he never knew was there—insecurity. The injury, feeling useless, fear of no longer having his career, fear that I would leave him, coupled with the pain pills that helped drown out the noise turned him into someone he didn’t recognize and couldn’t escape.
“I think a lot of my anger stems from when I lost my dad. I became so enraged with God and how he could let such a man of faith die. He had the power to heal him, and he didn’t. Why?”
“Because it was never about your dad. Your dad’s faith never swayed. But you, you lost your way. And so did I,” I say with tear-filled eyes.
“I think sometimes God tests us to see if we’re going to lean on him through the hard times, or crack under pressure. I believe we all failed the test,” my dad says. “But as long as we’re all still alive and breathing, there’s time to make it right.”
Tears fall down Brian’s face. “I have to make this right.” He sobs. Through my own tears, I watch the boy I’ve loved my whole life break down. Brian begins wiping away at his face, trying to hide the evidence of his sorrow. “I know what I have to do,” he says through shaky breaths.
“I need to go.” I stand abruptly, pushing my chair back as I do. It screeches across the linoleum, causing everyone’s attention to shift my way. I rush to the door, desperate for fresh air. This room is suffocating me.
“Echo,” Brian says, stopping me right as I grab the metal handle. I don’t look back. “I’ll be by for my stuff as soon as I’m released.” He doesn’t say anything else, nor does he need to. He knew we were over once he laid his hands on me.