Chapter 34 Hope
HOPE
This is the best date ever.
And it’s not because we’re at a place I’ve always wanted to visit, but I’m with the guy I love.
Heath and I spend hours at the aquarium, studying the sea creatures and wandering around as we explore the aquarium.
We make a quick stop at the cafeteria and grab ice cream.
Heath gets blueberry and I get chocolate, and then we make our way to where starfish are in a touch tank in an array of colors and patterns and rest quietly on the rocks.
Instructors stand nearby, offering guidance on how to interact with the creatures while emphasizing the importance of being gentle and mindful.
I inch closer to get a better look when a guy’s elbow swings in the direction of my face. Before it can make contact, Heath catches it and gives him a hard shove. The guy turns with a mean glare.
“What?!”
Heath traps me against the tank, with his arms on either side of like a barrier. Looking at him, with a flare of anger in his burning blue eyes he says, “Keep a good fucking look around yourself. Your elbow was about to hit my girlfriend.”
The low, rough tone of his voice makes the guy swallow. He’s shorter and skinner than Heath. If they were to throw punches, there’s no doubt Heath will do serious damage to him.
Without a single more glance, he scurries away from us.
“Asshole,” Heath mutters under his breath.
Since I’m wrapped up in him, I hear him so clearly. “Maybe it was an accident.”
He brings down his face to my right so he can look at me. “Don’t see the good in people. Some are just fucking bad.”
A rope tightens around my gut and tugs hard.
I’m sure he only meant that in the content of that guy, but I can’t help but think about my parents.
I see the good in them because I love them. Is that wrong?
I love them so much, but why does it hurt?
“Do you want to touch them?” Heath asks, breaking down my thoughts.
It takes me a few seconds to utter the reply. “Um, no…”
He frowns, and studies me with his curious eyes that saw right through me since day one.
“Want to get out of here?”
I slowly nod, leaning my back against his chest.
We stay like that for a few minutes, watching the starfish then move as the crowd gets thicker around the tanks.
Everyone seems eager to feel the starfish, but I’m not.
How I see it is, they look calm being alone.
They don’t want wandering hands on them, a touch that would disturb them. They just want to be.
Heath interlocks our fingers and maneuvers us out of the crowd safely.
At the exit there are many gift shops that are overflowing with souvenirs.
My gaze drifts over the shelves—everything looks irresistibly cute. Then, it lands on a star necklace and for some reason I can’t look away from it.
“Do you want to eat? I know a great place—Rose, are you listening?” Heath gives my hand a squeeze.
I shake my head, bringing my gaze back to him. “Yes. You were asking—”
He looks in the direction where I was staring and watch as his eyes narrow in thought. They seem to be searching for something.
“What is it that you want?” he asks finally.
A delicious curl unfurls in the pit of my stomach. “Nothing.”
He looks down at me and my breath gets stuck in my throat.
His blue eyes are so soft, they make me believe they’re the exact way the love-look in romance books is described — gentle, calm , and full of warmth. All of these emotions consume me so completely, I feel my chest cave in to make room for so much of his love.
“Rose,” and then he says my name and I break. “If you want something, we can get it. We can get anything you want.”
My pulse flutters under my skin and my skin turns flush.
I melt from the inside, it’s hard to keep my wishes tucked away.
“I thought we could get something,” I say. “I like a necklace. It looks pretty. But if it’s too much we don’t have—”
Heath is already tugging me in the direction of the shop I saw the necklace at. When we stop at the counter, I can’t help but stare at it.
Heath notices. Of course, he does.
Not wasting a single second, he buys it. It costs more than it does in Bellmare, but it doesn’t matter to him. He hands the owner a few bills and turns to me.
“Anything else, you want to buy?”
I assess the keychains and their prices. It’s the only thing I can buy here because it’s cheap. Marie gave me a lot of money, but I don’t want to use it that much. I want to spend what I can return to her. Although, knowing her, she won’t take it.
I see a simple H-letter shape keychain that catches my eyes. It’s small and silver in color and has no design on it. Exactly what he likes.
“Can I get this?” I ask the owner and he starts taking it out of the bunch.
Heath reaches for his wallet but I stop him.
“Let me, please.” I hand the money and grab the keychain.
Dangling in front of him, I smile. “Do you like it”
His eyes avert to the keychain then back at me. “I love it.”
I grin wider.
Slowly, he takes it from me. His thumb caress the entirety of the letter with such gentleness, my skin heats up. “It reminds me of you.”
“How?”
“That’s how your name starts. The name I fucking love.”
Now my skin is burning.
Heath chuckles deeply and we start walking.
As we step outside, the late afternoon air hangs around us, and the sun is slowly sinking toward the horizon, casting a warm glow over the parking lot. The sky is painted in a perfect blend of orange, red, and pink hues.
Cold, icy breeze whips past us and I quickly wrap my arms around myself.
“Time to go.”
I stand next to the passenger door, waiting for him to open it, but he jogs to the trunk and pulls out a black jacket. Striding back to me, he helps me put it on.
I laugh as I notice how big it looks on me. Yet the warmth and the scent of it just makes it feel right.
Peeking up at Heath, I’m about to tell him that but he’s looking at with a glint in his eyes. When they meet mine, they appear filled with heat and desire.
“Is something—”
“It looks perfect on you.” Then he helps me inside and then joins me.
Heath drives us to a pizza place where we have the best pizza I’ve ever had.
We talk about school and share memories from childhood — the happy ones.
Towards the end, when the sky starts getting dark and the room grows a little quieter.
Sitting in the tucked away corner of the room, he tells me his sister in a way I’ve never heard him before.
He describes little things about her and all the ways that she drove him crazy but also made him love her anyway.
It’s like he’s letting me know her on a deeper level.
He also explains how she got cancer and the time he spent at the hospital with her.
We don’t talk about our parents, because it’s a loaded topic that neither of us wants to get into.
At the end, the waiter serves us molter lava chocolate cake and I nearly hyperventilate.
“I’ve never had it,” I rush out. “I’ve only read about it in books.”
Heath doesn’t say anything and just passes me the spoon. I devour it slowly, enjoying every second of it.
While savoring it, he asks me more about my wishes and I tell him.
It’s not like he’s gonna make every single one of them true.
But sharing it with him feels enough.
___________________
“Are you sure I can get that many books?” I ask him for the seventh time.
Heath looks at me over the tall pile of books. “Yes, I’m sure. Now grab more books. I can still see you.”
The minute we arrived at the bookstore, he told me to buy enough books that the pile makes it difficult for him to see me.
I thought he was joking so I picked a single book and handed it to me. Then I just walked around, touching the books I’ve read — greeting the characters — and the ones I can’t wait to read someday.
I was so in my element that I forgot he was watching me and swiping those books and making a pile.
After what felt like half an hour, I turned around to check on him — it’s only then that I remembered that I’m not alone and he’s here too — and saw the pile and almost let out a squeal.
Heath just nudged me to kept going.
And that’s exactly what I did.
We end up buying twenty books and when he slides his credit card across the counter I try hard to not pull it back.
He carries my books to the trunk and put the bags in.
By the time he’s in the car with me, I know I’ve fallen in love with him all over again.
We sit in the parking lot, eyes locked and breathing softly.
His blue eyes look so intense and dark in the shadows. I notice how his hair is tousled, strands flying in all directions like he’s run his fingers through it a hundred times. But somehow, it still looks perfect. And his face… the edges are sharp and chiseled making him appear striking.
Heath is the most handsome guy I’ve ever seen.
After seeing his parents, I get why he is the way he is. They’re both insanely beautiful too.
The longer I stare at him, the more I think about his beauty.
The space feels too tight and small and my brain can’t stop thinking about —
I can fit on his lap or maybe I can straddle him, perhaps….
Go home. Now.
“Uh, we should go back,” I mutter and turn around with my heart racing inside my chest. Heat has crawled up to my neck, spreading like a slow burn. The warmth fills my cheeks, and I can feel it prickling all the way to the tips of my fingers.
I grab the seat belt with shaky hands and try to click it into place but I just can’t do it.
“Wait,” the low timbre of his deep voice sends a shiver down my spine.
Gently, he takes it from my hands and effortlessly does it.
“Thank you,” I murmur, staring at his chest and not his eyes.
He tilts my chin up and our gazes collide. “My eyes are up here.”
“I know,” I croak out in panic.
A smirk twitches his lips, then he leans closer in all seriousness. “The date has ended.”
“Not until you drive me home.”
A chuckle breaks out of him. “That’s when I’ll get my kiss?”
“You can get it here, too.” The words leave my mouth before I can think.
Heath glances down at my lips and smirks devilishly. “Give it to me, then, Rose.”
Not letting myself overthink, I place my palm over his cheek an inch closer to him. His hot labored breaths caress my lips and I shudder. But keep moving, decreasing distance between us until there isn’t any more.
Our lips meet and spark burst inside of me.
It’s like the first time. The emotions, the intensity and the feelings. But now, they are more strong.
Heath groans and delves his fingers into my hair and brings me closer to him. With that his lips move harder, kissing me deeply until I feel it in my soul.
Heat washes over me and everything inside turns to liquid warmth
When his tongue grazes the edge of my lips, I part them—hesitant, nervous—and he meets me there, slow and gentle. I can’t help but melt into him.
The world narrows to this moment. Just us.
We kiss for a while, until he focuses his attention on the side of my neck. A gasp escapes me and I hold his shoulder for support. My nerves quiver with the jolts that he sends through me, every time he places a hot, wet kiss on my skin.
“You smell so good,” he murmurs softly.
I’m wound up to tightly by the affect of his touch that I can’t let out a single word.
“And you’re so beautiful, Rose.”
No one’s ever told me that I’m beautiful. And he tells me that every chance that he gets.
“I love you,” he says, and tilts back his head to look at me.
“I love you too.”
For some strange reason, saying those words cause a twinge of sharp pain to slice through my heart. The fear buried inside of me, that something bad is going to happen to destroy this, resurfaces. And it starts stirring into a whirlwind.
Heath pecks my lips, then starts the car and drives us away from the city. But that fear lingers.