10. Hammer
HAMMER
“Hammer,” Merci called, and I could tell by the tone of her voice that she was confused.
“Yes, Ms. Merci?” I replied, pulling out the last of the seasonings I wanted to use on my meat before putting it on the grill.
She’d agreed to join me this evening so we could talk and get to know each other better.
As much as she laughed at me a few nights ago, I was serious about what I wanted our first date to be.
It was going to have to be throughout the week because her weekend was packed with five events—two she was hosting, and three she’d planned.
I loved that she not only had her own profitable business but that she loved what she did.
A woman with her own money was always a treat for me.
I loved spoiling her more than she spoiled herself.
“You’re eating all this cheese dip at one time?” she confirmed, looking at the large bowl of Rotel I’d poured for myself.
“Yeah, and don’t be tryna count my calories,” I grumbled, washing my hands.
“I’m not tryna count your calories, but I am concerned about your arteries.”
A bark of laughter escaped me. I wished I could say she was being dramatic, but it was a large bowl of dip.
“Aye, not too much on ya man now. I eat healthy for the most part. Let me enjoy myself this evening.”
“You got it, Mr. Freeman,” she said sweetly before lifting her hands in surrender. “Can I at least make some sides to go with the meat?”
“Yeah, but you might have to order what you want. I think the only vegetable I got here is some spinach.”
“Do you ever cook, Hammer?” she asked, opening my refrigerator.
“Maybe once a week. I don’t really have time to do anything but breakfast. Usually, I eat lunch and dinner out, or I eat what my mama cooks.”
She nodded her understanding before returning to the island and sitting next to me. “Let me see your phone.”
I slid it to her and rattled off my password with no hesitation. She went to my Notes app, and I figured Ariel had told her about me starting a list of her favorite things and foods. I guess she wanted to see it for herself because she cooed before giving me a hug and kiss.
“You’re sweet. You keep surprising me.”
“I just wanna make sure you’re satisfied,” I confessed, and that earned me another kiss.
Merci ended up doing a grocery order for the things she wanted to cook, and we chilled until the order arrived.
When she started on the sides, I went outside to fire up the grill.
I took my shirt off and didn’t really think too much of it until she stepped outside and gasped while I took a swig of my beer.
“Bae,” she whispered, hand covering her mouth. “What… What happened to you?”
Even though I didn’t see what she was talking about, I knew. It followed me every day of my fucking life. My shoulders sagged as I sighed and turned back toward the grill.
“My pops is what happened,” I shared as Merci walked over to me.
“He used to beat us all. The scars on my back are from the time I lost my second fight. He said every time I lost, he was gon’ beat me just like this.
” I chuckled at the thought, though there was nothing funny about the abuse at all.
That beating was so bad I almost bled to death.
My blood had soaked the carpeted floor and walls to the point where Ma was so traumatized we had to move.
“That was the last fight I ever lost in my life, though.” My head shook as I swiped the beer off the side table on the grill.
“From that point on, I made sure a nigga could never say he got the best of me… and that included my pops.”
Chugging the beer down did nothing to take away the sound of my screaming all those years ago.
The look on my mother’s and brother’s faces when they got back home and saw what he’d done.
Being so weak I was in and out of consciousness.
Having to get a blood transfusion and lying about who’d beaten me.
I turned slightly and saw Merci staring at my back with tears falling down her cheeks.
“I’m cool, sweetheart,” was what I said, though I wasn’t completely sure that was the truth.
She wiped her tears and sniffled before asking, “Can I… Is it okay if I…”
“Yeah,” I granted, just above a whisper.
Her touch was delicate as she traced the scars on my back.
When her lips replaced her hands, my eyes snapped shut, and a low hum escaped me as I shivered.
I’d never let a woman touch my scars before.
Never told them where they came from. Never wanted to be that vulnerable.
But with Merci, she made telling my truth less scary.
For the first time, it felt like I had a safe space beyond my brother.
“I’m so sorry you had to go through that, bae.”
Turning in her arms, I cupped her cheeks and gave her a quick kiss.
“It’s cool. Well, it’s not cool, but I feel like it’s a big part of why I am who I am today.
Why I feel driven to help people. Why I can’t stand to see anyone be abused or violated.
He’s dead… so it ain’t like he can hurt me or anyone else in my family again, so there’s that. ”
Regardless of how I tried to downplay the situation, the concern and care in her eyes made it hard for me to remain hard.
It wasn’t pity—I’d seen that before. It was truly hurt over my past situation.
Merci wrapped her arms around me and held me close.
What started as a normal hug turned into something that touched my soul in a place nothing else ever had before.
The way she held me, rocked me, soothed me, whispered that I was safe.
That I was okay. That I was beautiful. That I was a survivor.
That shit brought tears to a nigga’s eyes.
Merci cupped my cheeks and thumbed my tears away before giving me a tender, lingering kiss.
Resting my forehead against hers, I closed my eyes and released a shaky breath.
“You know you can’t leave me now, right?” I confirmed, making her giggle.
“I hadn’t planned to, so that works.”
We held each other for a little while longer before she went back into the kitchen to handle the sides while I worked the grill. And the fact that she didn’t look at me any differently or change the vibe after hearing my truth only made me respect her more.
It wasn’t until we sat down to eat that we started to talk and get to know each other more.
We talked about our childhoods, flying through mine to keep the vibe light.
Her upbringing was completely different from mine, and I honestly loved that for her.
It was a blessing not only having both parents in the home, but to also have a healthy, stable, and loving home—one that showed you not just your parents as parents but as partners and lovers as well.
We talked a little more about our careers and goals, but most of the talk was about our hobbies and interests, likes and dislikes.
Merci shared that she loved spending time with her family and partying in all capacities—not just at clubs and lounges but family get-togethers and dinner parties and social events as well.
I thought it was cool that, because she loved shopping so much, she did quarterly donations to get rid of the things she no longer wanted and used.
And every summer, she took her gently-used designer items to her old high school to give to the senior girls.
“Oh, and I love reading books and going to book expos,” she said, pulling her legs under her on the sofa. “I try to go to at least one book expo a quarter.”
“What’s on your calendar for this year?” I asked, knowing I’d need time to mentally prepare to be in a space like that, but I didn’t mind taking her and blowing a bag on her and her books.
“I already put them on your calendar,” she said before giggling. “What about you? I know you love live music and sports.”
“And fishing,” I added. “Water in general. Me and JoJo rent a yacht every fall in Cali, but I want my own by forty-five. I guess my only other hobbies are working out and doing puzzles. It quiets my mind.”
“You consider working out a hobby?”
“Yeah, only because I don’t take it as seriously as a lot of people do. I don’t count calories, shred, bulk, or none of that shit. Usually, I eat whatever I want. I like the physicality of cardio and lifting weights. Looking the way I do is a bonus.”
“Yeah, you… definitely look nice,” she muttered under her breath as she eyed me before clearing her throat.
Chuckling, I licked my lips to hide the fact that her compliment had me smiling harder than it should have.
“Do you work out? Your body is amazing.”
Merci wasn’t overly thick, but she had meat in the right places. She was hippy with a small but round ass that matched her slim frame. I was an ass man—that, I would admit—but her hips gave her a feminine look that made my dick hard every time we were in each other’s presence.
“Yes. I do cardio five days a week and Pilates three,” she replied, pulling her phone out of her pocket. Her eyebrows scrunched as she stared at the phone. “Sorry, Mr. Freeman. This is one of my clients.”
“Go ahead and answer.”
Standing, she accepted the call with, “Hey, Keisha. Is everything okay?”
I could understand why she was asking that because it was late as hell to be calling someone about business. Her soft smile as she nodded was so beautiful. Merci had the kind of smile that made you want to do whatever it took to keep it on her face.
“Yes, everything is ready to go for tomorrow night. I got you, girl. Your man’s going to love his surprise birthday party.
” She paused, patiently giving the woman time to express her concerns before saying, “Yes. I saw that email from the caterer. I didn’t mention it to you, because I handled it myself.
That’s what you paid me for. You don’t have to stress over anything.
I got it.” She laughed. “Yes, girl. Get you some rest. Relax. Everything’s taken care of.
Right. I’ll see you for the initial walkthrough tomorrow.
Bye.” Merci blew out a long breath as she sat back down.
“Sorry about that. She had to have called like three times to even get through since I had my phone on Do Not Disturb.”
“It’s cool. I’m sure she needed you to ease her mind so she could rest. All is well.”
We continued to talk for a little while longer, and as much as she was trying to stay up, I could tell she needed her rest when she yawned and asked, “What’s one good trait about yourself that you wish you no longer had?”
“Being too loyal,” I answered after thinking about it for a while. “Or maybe, I want to learn to put myself first while being loyal to others. You?”
“Hmm… being so benevolent. Even with me knowing how grimy people can be in this world, I still operate from a place of love. And good. Sucks sometimes because most people take it for granted or take advantage, and I hardly ever get what I give in return.”
“You will now that you have me.”
With a smile, Merci climbed over to where I was on the sofa and cuddled up against me. I held her until I felt her body relax against mine.
“If you fall asleep, I’m putting you in my bed,” I warned, making her laugh softly as she sat up.
“Let me go. As late as I be up for these parties, you’d think I was a night owl. That shit doesn’t kick in until the weekend.”
To keep from telling her I wanted her to stay, I remained silent.
I walked her to her car, and for her to not like long goodbyes, she didn’t seem to be in a rush to get inside.
Merci might not have said it, but I could tell she was holding back and wanting to take things slow with me, and I would respect that.
Just because I was all in already didn’t mean she had to be too.
In fact, I respected her wanting to go slow and giving me the space to prove my intentions were sincere.
Her hands were all over my chest, my abs, my arms—caressing, squeezing, worshipping.
If she didn’t stop, us waiting to go to the clinic together before we had sex was going to be out the window.
I knew I was clean, and she was too, but since I planned to dive in that pussy raw, getting tested together first was the right thing to do.
“You keep touching me like that, and I ain’t gon’ let you leave.”
When Merci licked her lips and looked up at me, I lowered myself and kissed her.
In the process, I guided her away from the door so I could open it for her.
After helping her inside, I buckled her seat belt and gave her another kiss before telling her to let me know when she made it home, especially since I knew she was sleepy.
Stepping back, I watched her pull out of my driveway, knowing only so much time would pass of me being okay with watching her walk away from me.
Merci was the one. That, I knew for sure.