2. Jared
JARED
I didn’t like the worry in Lacie’s tone when our call ended. The idiot she was marrying had to know how anxious she got about her schedule.
Why would he leave her hanging like this?
Fort Worth was beautiful any time of year, but Christmas had made its mark on the city.
Snowmen adorned the street corners, and many of the shop windows had been painted with white images of snow and holly berries. But Lacie was tired of painted snow.
She wanted the real thing, which was why she’d booked this trip. What did Wyatt mean by putting her off like he had?
I wanted to call and see if she’d heard anything, but I couldn’t go there.
She wasn’t mine to worry about. She had Wyatt.
I gripped the steering wheel and concentrated on the traffic around me. Things would be fine.
I really needed to focus on the other woman in my life—and no, I wasn’t referring to my mother.
Much as I wanted to hit the gym with the guys, my detour to Lacie’s meant they were probably finishing up. Heading to Tia’s was the second option.
She lived in an apartment above the scuba gear shop downtown. The scent of synthetic rubber sometimes wafted its way up into her living room, but fortunately, the smell wasn’t as rampant as it was in the shop itself.
I pulled into the secluded parking lot in the alley and strolled up a set of stairs to knock on her door.
It only occurred to me that I should have brought her lunch or something. It was around lunchtime, wasn’t it?
I’d have to ask her out. She’d like that just as much.
The noise of something colliding with the floor rumbled from inside and then the door flew open. Tia’s brown eyes lit up at the sight of me. She was dressed in workout clothes, and her mahogany hair was piled on top of her head.
“Hey!” She was breathless and fidgety. She jogged in place and gestured to the TV behind her. “Just finishing up. Come on in.”
“Is this a bad time?” I asked.
“No, come in.”
Turning her back to me, she didn’t wait to see if I did so. Instead, her attention was back on her TV and the remote in her hands. Clicking it at the screen, her workout began again, and she began mimicking the actions of the woman on the screen.
And look. It wasn’t that I had anything wrong with watching a woman exercise. I mean, she was my girlfriend, for Pete’s sake. But that was in a gym.
This?
I hadn’t ever worked out with Tia before. I hadn’t yet gotten this much of an inside look into her life, and I wasn’t sure why it made me uncomfortable.
But it did.
I sank onto the couch and pulled out my phone, needing somewhere else to look while she hopped on one foot and switched to the other.
Her workout went on, so I kept scrolling while the woman on the screen spouted out encouraging statements and instruction on the various aerobic techniques.
I had several notifications on my social media. Only a few days ago, I’d changed my status from Single to In a Relationship , and I was still getting a few likes and comments on that. I tapped to like them and then found a few weightlifting reels.
My thoughts strayed to the guys, to the soreness in my biceps because Miguel and I were competing to see who could lift a new record first, and how Lacie had been there.
And she’d bet on me.
Soon enough, the rapid, peppy music stopped. I peered up to find Tia taking a long swig from her water bottle and wiping sweat from her forehead with a towel.
Good thing I hadn’t brought lunch after all.
“You hungry?” I asked.
She laughed, and my smile sprouted at the sound. Tia really did have a great laugh.
“You came to ask if I was hungry?”
I set my phone down. Was that a problem? She’d done this to me a few times before now, and it wasn’t like I was sensitive or anything like that. But it occasionally felt like she made fun of me for things other people didn’t care about.
Like me dropping by to take her to lunch. Why was that funny?
“I thought…well, yeah. Are you?”
She patted the back of her neck with her towel. Her skin had a becoming flush to it, and she was much easier to look at now that she wasn’t jumping around.
“Sure. Give me a few minutes to shower and get ready?”
“You got it. I’ve already made myself at home here.” I patted the couch.
Thirty minutes later, with my stomach rumbling, the two of us set out to find food. We stopped at my favorite sandwich place. Soft chatter wafted through, along with the smell of fresh bread and meat.
“Any new security setup jobs this time of year?” Tia asked as she checked out the menu listed above the cashier’s head.
I sold security systems. Most guys on the team traveled to Texas or other locations during the summer months—many bringing their families with them for the duration of their stay. I kept mainly to home, though occasionally, I traveled to find new customers.
Sometimes it was Louisiana. Sometimes Alaska. Mostly, though, I stayed in Texas.
“Business isn’t as hopping now as it is during the summer when the out-of-town crew comes in, but I still manage to find some clients here and there.”
Typically, I made enough in the busy months to tide me over during the slow ones.
Tia was distracted, smiling in response to me as the person in front of us in line got his order, and we moved forward in his place.
We ordered our food—BLT for me, turkey and cheese for her—and found a seat near the window. This one was painted with a pair of snowmen and a motif of snowflakes, which compensated for the lack of snow in the warm weather outside.
“When do you leave for your cruise?” I asked.
“Today,” she said. “I’ll be heading out this evening.”
How weird was it that both of the women in my life were leaving on the same day?
Wait. That sounded way too messed up.
I should only have one woman in my life.
Frowning, I shook away the thought and was relieved when the cashier brought our sandwiches, taking the number from its stand on our table.
Tia set her purse on the empty chair beside her and shuffled the paper boat holding her sandwich. Her fingers tapped on its side a few times.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t convince my parents to bring you along,” she said.
“It’s okay. I’m sure they want to make sure we’re going to be in it for the long haul before spending that kind of money.”
Truth be told, I could have paid my own way on the cruise, but I hadn’t wanted to impose on her family—not when her parents had made it clear that I wasn’t considered to be part of it.
She and I had only just started dating, after all.
It was such a contrast to Anya Sorensen, my mom’s best friend. Anya would have invited my parents and me along anytime they so much as sneezed in another city or state.
“Are we in this for the long haul?”
Her question caught me in the middle of bringing my BLT to my mouth. Gaping, I stared at her across the table while the festive jingling sounds of sleigh bells chimed in the peppy song that played on the overhead speakers.
Without taking a bite, I lowered my sandwich back to its paper boat.
Unease twisted in my stomach. I supposed it was time for a Determine-the-Relationship kind of conversation, though that didn’t make this any easier.
In all honesty, I wasn’t sure what I wanted our relationship to be.
I liked Tia, sure. We’d met online. I liked her enough to continue seeing her after the few dates we’d had—and apparently, I liked her enough to be in the same room while she worked out. But did I want more than that?
The skin on my arms tingled. I gave in and took a bite, needing to think before I responded.
This was a make-it-or-break-it kind of moment. The kind of moment where women who were leaving on cruises with their families over Christmas would rehash whatever I said a dozen times a day and pick apart every word because that was just what they did.
“Is that what you want?” I asked.
Total defer tactic. Nailed it.
Tia reached for my hand across the table. Her soft fingers stroked mine, and her expression deepened from simply pleased to something silkier, the kind of look for closed doors.
She’d looked at me this way just before I’d kissed her for the first time a few weeks ago.
My abs tightened, but I didn’t let go of her hand.
“I’d like that,” she said.
Okay…
My brain didn’t usually have this difficult of a time keeping up, but I couldn’t unpack what she meant. She’d like whatever this is to be lasting? Just how lasting were we talking about?
I’d already told everyone she was my girlfriend. I wasn’t ready to propose or anything.
Did she want more of a claim on me or something? Moving in together wasn’t really my thing.
Before I could sort through this train-wreck of thought, Tia went on.
She slipped her hand away from mine, skidding her chair noisily across the floor and meeting me straight on.
“If we’re getting serious, we need to talk about Lacie.”
I lowered my sandwich. “What about Lacie?”
“You spend an awful lot of time with her.”
“Spending time doesn’t mean there’s more going on.” Not for Lacie, anyway.
For me, though…
I couldn’t think about that. Lacie was engaged.
To someone who wasn’t me.
Eventually, my heart had to accept that fact.
“But I’m going on a cruise with my family for a week. And you’re going to be here with her for Christmas. I just…I’m your girlfriend.” She drove the stake in, hard.
I couldn’t say I liked territorialism much. For whatever reason, my defenses flared.
“She’s leaving with her fiancé for Christmas,” I said.
Her idiot fiancé, who couldn’t be bothered to give her updates on his status.
I wondered if they’d made it off all right. She hadn’t called or sent any other texts telling me either way.
Tia sank back into her seat, visibly relaxing. “Oh, she is?”
“Yeah, they’re going to this?—”
Her face softened into a relieved smile, and she laughed at me again in that way she did. The way that made me feel self-conscious. What was so funny?
She scooted her chair closer again. The scraping sound cut me off, and she waved her hand in the air.
“I don’t want to know their plans. Just as long as she won’t be with you.”
I hurried to ease her mind. We’d just had a DTR. I’d said I was open to lasting, though whether it was the peppermint gum kind of lasting or the redwood forest kind of lasting, I still wasn’t sure at this point.
Either way, I did like Tia. She was beautiful. She made me laugh. She was a great kisser.
I wasn’t ready to let this go yet, and this wasn’t the first time she’d expressed concern about my relationship with Lacie.
The last time my best friend had come up, I’d brought Tia over to Miguel’s apartment to watch a movie on his new projector. The fun-loving buffoons I lifted with asked where Lacie was, pouring awkward tar all over what should have been a casual evening.
Tim had added the feathers by mentioning how inseparable Lacie and I had been all our lives, as though Tia had needed the explanation.
I’d wanted to take him out back.
How could he not grasp that that kind of talk would set my girlfriend off?
And it had. Tia had stormed out without watching a minute of the movie. I’d taken her home and endured tears and a lecture after the incident. And I’d done all I could to assure her that Lacie was just a friend.
I thought Tia had believed me.
Evidently, I’d been wrong.
“She’s marrying someone else. I told you, we’re just friends, and we’ve only ever been just friends.”
It was all true. I had wanted to be more—many times. But I hadn’t wanted to risk our friendship by mentioning as much, not when she didn’t seem to feel the same.
Having Lacie as a friend was better than not seeing her at all.
It hurt to watch her date other guys, but I kept hoping that one day my heart would finally get the message that she wasn’t interested.
Tia pursed her lips. I slipped my arm around her, luring her closer to me and pressing a kiss to her cheek for good measure.
“I swear,” I said into her ear. “She’s just a friend.”
And I held her gaze, hoping she read as much in my expression.
“Okay,” she said, letting the matter drop.
The remainder of our lunch passed in simple conversation. I left a tip on the table and escorted Tia back to her apartment. I followed her up the stairs to her door, eagerness building in my chest. She paused on the top step, toying with my collar.
“I want to be more serious with you,” she said.
“I’d like that,” I said, rubbing my hands along her slim waist and feeling desire build in my chest.
I stroked my nose along her cheek, moving in, ready for the kiss. At least we’d gotten the Lacie issue out of the way.
Tia reared back, pushing me back just enough with her hands on my shoulders. She got this stern look on her pretty face. A line appeared between her brows, dousing the momentum that had been building.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
She tilted her head to one side and rested her hands on my chest.
“You say you want more with me. But we can’t be if Lacie is always in the way. You can’t move on in a relationship if you’re already in one.”
My anticipation for a kiss went flatter than a punctured tire. I clenched my fists and fought down a groan.
“I thought we talked about this already.”
She tossed her dark hair back. “We did. But nothing was really settled.”
Had she been part of the same conversation? I’d explained the situation to her. I’d thought she agreed and understood.
“We grew up together,” I clarified.
Again.
“Her mom was my mom’s best friend, and so we’ve known each other all our lives. We did everything together because our moms did everything together. But Lacie is just my friend,” I insisted.
I couldn’t count the number of times I’d told Tia as much.
“Prove it.” Tia’s dark eyes turned from sunshine to thunder.
She wasn’t laughing this time—but I still didn’t know how to read this.
“What are you saying?” I asked.
With her hands around my neck, she fiddled with the hair at my nape. Her expression turned innocent and inviting, but something about the sudden shift felt off.
Forced.
“I’m sure you’ll find a good solution. In the meantime, I’ll miss you every minute we’re apart.”
The words turned suddenly sugary and sounded far too fake. Before I could grapple any kind of grounding, she leaned in and pressed a kiss to my mouth.
It took me a few seconds before I could reciprocate, but even then, no nerves fired. No sensation flared.
In fact, the impact was about as memorable as if I’d kissed my own arm.
Not what I’d been hoping for. I knew from previous experience that we were capable of a whole lot more than this.
Before I could try and improve the situation, Tia withdrew. She backed up and climbed a single step, looking down on me with her eyes narrowed and disapproval turning down the corners of her pink mouth.
“Have fun on your trip,” I said, hurrying to remedy whatever mistake I’d just made.
She smiled as she closed her door, leaving me alone on the stairs.
What just happened?
Confused and conflicted, I turned and headed back outside. Every one of my return footsteps to my car had a tag, an unwelcome, pestering thought as annoying as any bee mistaking me for a flower. But this wasn’t something I could swat away.
Tia didn’t like Lacie. I knew that much from things she’d said after the three of us had spent any kind of time together.
I’d assured her over and over that nothing was going on between us. Anyone who saw us together could tell as much.
What was it Tia had said? You can’t move on in a relationship if you’re already in one.
I triggered my car’s keyless entry and climbed in. Wynton Marsali’s epic holiday trumpet skills swirled in my BMW, adding a low-key, laidback feel I desperately needed, and I gripped the steering wheel.
“She wants me to prove Lacie is just my friend? Haven’t I already done that? What more can I do?”
But I knew.
Oh, I knew in an instant, the minute the words left my mouth.
I’d been slow to pick up on Tia’s cues at the time, but they blasted all around me now. Tia didn’t want me to stop spending so much time with Lacie.
She wanted me to stop spending time with her, period.
My initial thought was rejection. Not happening. Lacie had always been first in my life, and she would always come first for me.
But she was getting married. And I knew I needed to move on, too.
It was the whole reason I started dating Tia in the first place.
If I wanted to pursue any kind of ‘lasting’ with any other woman, I’d have to pick one or the other. I’d never thought of it in such ultimate terms before.
I’d always figured I’d either marry Lacie, or whoever I did marry would be secure enough in my feelings for her that any jealousy or discord on the subject would be nullified anyway.
Instantly, I wanted to smash the whole idea. I wanted to tell Tia where to go with her request and be done.
Lacie was part of my life. She always had been. Always would be.
But I liked Tia. She intrigued me enough that I wasn’t ready to let her go.
What was I going to do?
Maybe things would change between us once Lacie and Wyatt got married. Much as I didn’t like the idea—and much as I hated the guy—it was for the best. Maybe then Tia could see that Lacie was happily settled and let the matter go.
Yes, that was it. We just needed to wait a few more months.
Lacie would marry Wyatt Douchebrand. I could let her go a little more easily after that, couldn’t I?
Feeling both settled and un all at once, I shifted into gear when my phone buzzed from the dash with Lacie’s name. A phone call. Not a text.
Which meant, if Lacie was calling me, this couldn’t be anything good.