Chapter IV #2
“I cannot understand her marrying him,” confessed he. “Of course, I cannot think how anyone could be foolish or desperate enough that they would spend their life with such a complete buffoon.”
“What are you prepared to do about it, then?” asked his cousin, a devilish, scheming gleam in his eyes. “And what part did you have planned for me?”
He met Fitzwilliam’s playful taunt with a mischievous grin. “I need you to occupy him so I can have some time with Miss Elizabeth.”
Fitzwilliam shook his head while the corners of his mouth turned down in the scowl Darcy knew so well.
“Is that wise? She is all but engaged to Lady Catherine’s illustrious parson.
Are you ready to face your aunt’s wrath if you interfere with this match, which the good man seems to believe heaven itself has ordained? ”
“Illustrious?” asked Darcy. “Are we talking about the same person, or did I miss the presence of another at the Bennet home last night?”
Fitzwilliam glanced at Georgiana and winked. She responded with a spate of giggles, which increased until she locked her hand over her mouth to stop the noise.
“I will do what I can,” said the colonel with a chuckle, “but if I may be so bold, why not let the man ruin his own chances? From what I saw, she was ready to have him run off the property and barred from ever returning. She is a strong woman, and I doubt she suffers the fool much longer.”
Darcy shook his head. “Why put her through that humiliation when a few well-placed hints and suggestions might better serve the purpose? And why take the chance that the rumors, which her mother seems eager to encourage, are enough to force her into a marriage that has her miserable forever?”
His cousin sprang to his feet and beckoned for Darcy to rise. “What are you waiting for? Mr. Collins is not about do the work for us.”
“No,” agreed Darcy, following him at a more sedate pace.
“Welcome, Mr. Darcy,” said Mr. Collins, greeting them as if he already considered himself master of Longbourn, though to Elizabeth’s knowledge, Mr. Bennet remained among the living.
“Come in and make yourselves comfortable,” said he, bustling about in a misplaced, overzealous manner. “I will have the servants bring additional chairs to accommodate everyone, and talk to Mr. Hill about neglecting his duties.”
“I think that is my father’s responsibility, Mr. Collins, not yours,” said she, holding her temper by the thinnest of threads.
The day was just begun, yet already the man had found a new level of insufferable. Had Mr. Darcy not arrived with his charming cousin and delightful sister, she might have seriously considered retreating to her apartment and locking herself inside until the next day.
“Of course,” replied he with a great bow. “I am just doing my part to make our guests comfortable.”
A snort of laughter drew her attention to Mr. Darcy, who was giving his sister a gentle nudge with his elbow.
Miss Darcy pressed her lips together, yet the laughter she struggled to contain brought a bright crimson to her cheeks. A quick smile and nod of the head sent her new friend to sit on the bench under the window, where Elizabeth joined her.
“Forgive me, but I could not help myself,” said she, one last giggle escaping her when they took their seats.
“I know it is impolite but seeing him bow to you was too funny to ignore. We are not among royalty, unless my brother forgot to tell me. If he had bent any lower, his nose would have touched the floor.”
“Watching him can be amusing,” agreed she, “when he is not doing his utmost to annoy me, which seems to keep him busy every waking hour.”
Elizabeth smiled and lifted her eyes to survey the room. With Mr. Collins loose and unattended, she needed to pay attention. If left alone, he might destroy any remaining vestiges of her composure.
She saw Mrs. Bennet fussing around Jane and Mr. Bingley, which was no surprise; that was sure to increase as she sought to encourage his interest in her eldest daughter.
To her amusement, Mr. Darcy’s cousin had Mr. Collins’s attention. He sat enthralled, listening to the colonel regale him with tales of his adventures while fighting on the continent.
He sent her a smile but did not pause in his narration, and Elizabeth made a note to thank him for coming with Mr. Darcy today. He would not understand why she expressed such gratitude, but she needed to let him know she valued his company.
“Your cousin is a unique individual,” said Miss Darcy, bringing Elizabeth’s awareness back, “and I do not mean that as a compliment.”
She giggled, and Elizabeth joined her, keeping her laughter quiet, so as not to attract anyone’s attention, especially Mr. Collins. The less she had to do with him, the less danger to her sanity.
“Fitzwilliam is not impressed with the man,” said Miss Darcy, “but he is too polite to show his opinion. That is just one trait people in Derbyshire compliment him on. As a brother, he is kind, and I love that about him.”
“Commendable qualities that Miss Elizabeth also possesses in abundance,” said Mr. Collins, having approached unnoticed.
She shuddered at the sound of his voice and saw Miss Darcy do the same. Something about the man encouraged revulsion, and her friend’s identical reaction told her others felt the same.
“I am no better than anyone and not as good as Mr. Darcy, apparently,” said she, stealing a glance at Colonel Fitzwilliam, who, to her surprise, shrugged his shoulders. The gesture’s meaning escaped her.
“Nonsense,” argued Mr. Collins, “Miss Elizabeth, you are too modest, which further warms my heart. Lady Catherine has counseled me more than once about finding a gentlewoman with attributes like yours. I am sure her approval will be swift and enthusiastic.”
“You have not ‘found’ me,” said she, the temptation to fasten her hands about his neck growing. She had to get away for this man before they acted without her permission.
“Miss Elizabeth does not appear to need finding,” offered Mr. Darcy, his polite statement the soothing balm she needed.
“I hope I am not intruding,” said he. “We have not talked yet today, and I did not want to live with that regret.”
He acknowledged her tormentor with a brief nod and turned to her again. “And I wanted to rescue you from Georgiana,” chuckled he, gracing his sister with a devilish grin.
“I was not bothering Miss Elizabeth,” insisted the girl, stamping her foot on the floor. “We were trying to become better acquainted, but someone interrupted us.” She sent a pointed glare in Mr. Collins’s direction, but Mr. Darcy ignored her mild anger with the uninvited parson.
“I did not have the chance to finish last night’s story of my military service,” said the colonel, guiding Mr. Collins toward the far side of the room. The man did not resist, and Elizabeth heaved a sigh of relief as she watched them leave.
“Miss Darcy is no bother,” said she, recalling the comment before her opportune rescue. “She is delightful company. Your sister is always polite and well-informed about anything we have discussed. I think you should commend her tutor.”
“I will follow your sage advice as soon as we return home,” promised he, “and I thank you for your kindness. Many women view her as an inconvenience and do not pay her any attention unless she is with me. You welcomed her without hesitation and continued to treat her with respect and affection. You are a remarkable person, Miss Elizabeth.”
“Mr. Darcy,” came the whining voice of Miss Bingley, “it appears as though your beautiful sister is tiring. Do you not feel it is time she returned to Netherfield? Her journey from London yesterday must have been exhausting.”
She turned to Miss Darcy and placed a hand on her arm. “Come, Georgiana, and let me help you dress. It is cool outside, and we cannot have you catching a cold, can we?”
“If she were tired and wanted to leave,” stated Mr. Darcy, stopping the interfering young woman in her tracks, “she would tell me. As she has said nothing, I have no reason to take her away from here.”
Miss Bingley dropped the arm and gave a short curtsey. “As you wish. I was only trying to protect your precious sister from illness.”
Without a backward glance she left the group; one more person Elizabeth was glad to be rid of, even if her absence was temporary.
“Thank you for drawing him away from my niece,” said Mrs. Gardiner to Colonel Fitzwilliam as he extricated himself from the parson. “If his manners were less odious, she might enjoy visiting with the others.”
“She seems to like talking with Darcy,” said he, tipping his head toward the group, now reduced to three with Miss Bingley’s departure.
“It is clear she does not mind his attention,” was the reply. “Forgive my observation, but her manner suggests she prefers it above anyone’s, tonight at least.”
The colonel watched Elizabeth’s lively conversation for half a minute and then brought his eyes back to Mrs. Gardiner, a sly grin upon his face.
“I am not sure if Darcy would approve,” said he, “but I am going to tell you anyway and hope he is not too upset with me.”
“Tell me what?” replied she, traces of a smile emerging as she waited.
The expression did not escape the colonel’s notice, and he returned hers with a grin of his own.
“Darcy wants a more personal relationship with Miss Elizabeth,” said he, stepping closer as if to afford a measure of privacy.
“He cannot understand why she would wed someone so unsuitable and wants to show her he is interested. Unfortunately, Mr. Collins’s presence makes the task much more difficult. ”
Mrs. Gardiner looked him straight in the eye. “May I help? Lizzy cannot marry that man, and I would relish any chance to interfere.”
Colonel Fitzwilliam’s smile became a wicked grin, and he leaned closer to share the plans with her.
“That sounds like it might work,” said she when they separated. “Just let me know what you need, and I will do my best.”
“I think we should leave,” said Mr. Darcy, approaching the scheming pair with Elizabeth and Miss Darcy following. “Georgiana is tired, despite her refusal to admit that, and tomorrow is a busy day.”
“The Christmas assembly takes place in the morning,” said Elizabeth as the guests donned their coats.
“Are you able to attend with your sister? I promise you will find more enjoyment this year than last,” said she, casting a sly glance toward Mr. Darcy.
Mrs. Gardiner suspected some private joke between the two, but now was not the time to demand an explanation.
“May we, Fitzwilliam?” asked the girl, shivering with excitement. “It sounds like so much fun.”
“Yes,” answered he with a laugh. “I would not dream of saying no to such a polite request.”
“Thank you, thank you,” said she, throwing her arm around his neck in exuberance, only to step away, her facing turning red with the display.
“You are a kind brother, Mr. Darcy,” said Elizabeth as he passed through the exit, which prompted him to stop and offer a farewell wave.
“He is a splendid gentleman,” Elizabeth heard Mr. Gardiner say when the door closed, “who would make a strong partner for your favorite daughter, don’t you think?”
Mr. Bennet nodded and turned toward the library. “He would, and a loving companion as well.”
“Then should you not caution your cousin about his behavior? He made her evening miserable and embarrassed all of us.”
Mr. Bennet stopped to regard his brother-in-law with an amused smile. “I am rather enjoying the sight of him acting the fool. This is the best time I have had this month, and maybe all of November.”
“But what about your daughter? If you are not careful, she will end up marrying the dolt, and then what? Are you willing to sacrifice her happiness for temporary amusement?”
She saw Mrs. Gardiner edge closer, as though curious about the response and ready to enter the conversation if necessary. Elizabeth felt a surge of love as she realized her aunt’s movements showed her determination to protect her niece from a ruinous marriage.
“Calm yourself, Edward,” she heard her father reply. “I promise you; she will never marry that fool. That is a fate I do not wish on anyone, especially Lizzy.”
“May I speak with you?” said Mr. Collins, a tone of reprimand in his voice.
“I am on my way to bed,” said she, unwilling to endure another minute with him.
“It is vital that we discuss your conduct tonight,” said he, moving to block her path and prevent her from climbing the stairs to her room and its freedom from the torture of his company.
“As an engaged woman,” began he, to which Elizabeth drew in her breath, prepared to censure him without pity. How dare he question her behavior when his mere presence had been a blight on the gathering?
From the corner of her eye, she saw her aunt and uncle hurry from the library entrance to her side, the concern on their faces a worry for her. What was wrong? Mrs. Gardiner looked angry, and he seemed upset as well.
She tried to prepare herself, but ignorance of the problem prevented anything more than patience and dread.
“Were Colonel Fitzwilliam’s stories not entertaining?
” said Mr. Gardiner, placing a gentle hand on Mr. Collins’s back and propelling him toward the sitting-room.
“I thought I would die laughing at his description of conditions in France. No melons for breakfast other than the occasional lemon? How did they survive?”
His voice faded as they entered the room, leaving Elizabeth alone with her aunt.
“Go to bed,” suggested she, “before you lose the chance.”
“Thank you,” she replied, climbing the stairs without sparing a glance toward Mr. Collins, who, from the replies she overheard, appeared interested in Mr. Gardiner’s comment.
She hurried to her bedroom, closing and locking the door behind her. If that man wanted to berate her, he would have to wait until morning. Even then, Elizabeth was not sure she would allow him to say anything.