Chapter 17
NICOLETTE
I rub at my eyes, pulling in a yawn just as the car slows to a stop in an almost-bare parking lot.
“How was your nap?” He kisses the top of my head, and I feel the warmth spreading across my skin, erasing the horror from before.
“Mmm…good.” I lift up my head, pressing my fingers into my eyes.
“I can see that.” He smirks, glancing down at his shoulder.
“Oh my God. I drooled on you.” I pinch my lips and shut my eyes with complete and utter humiliation.
He chuckles so freely, I want to bathe in the feeling it gives me. Pure happiness. That’s what being with him feels like.
“I’m never taking it off.” He hits me with a showstopping grin, and there goes my pulse. “Come on, let’s go get a room.”
Instantly, my mind goes to why we’re actually here. I can’t help but recall that woman on top of me, choking the life out of me, while her cold eyes seeped into mine. She didn’t even hesitate once she jumped in from the window.
I ran into the closet and held on to that doorknob, but she dragged it open right before I slammed it into her face.
The gun she had on her slipped from her grasp, and instead of going after it, she grabbed a handful of my hair and tossed me onto the floor. Stars exploded before my eyes when my head hit the ground, and she took advantage of that moment.
My fingers slide up to my neck, the burning sensation still present.
With a slow sigh, my eyes take in the two-story motel, green and pink fluorescent lights bathing it. It reminds me of a nightclub, except a lot seedier.
There are only three cars parked in the lot, and I’m hoping it’s the people who work here. Don’t want too many eyes on us.
He exits the vehicle, taking out the luggage, and comes to stand on my side.
He swings my door open. “You ready?”
“Yeah, just…” I fidget, and my feet refuse to move.
“It’s okay to be afraid, little one.” He takes my hand in his and gently pulls me against his chest, tilting my face up to meet his eyes. “I’m so damn sorry…for everything. If I lost you. If I let that happen…”
I extend my hand toward the thick stubbles riding his jaw and hold him in my palm.
“I don’t blame you. I never will.” My arms circle around his neck.
“You should, Nicolette. My family cost you everything. Your freedom. Your life. If I could do one thing for you, it would be to give you the world and make you realize I don’t belong in it.”
The sheer, utter devastation of his words breaks my heart.
“If you gave me a world that didn’t include you, I’d burn it to the ground and walk through hell to find you. Because whether you realize it or not, Raph Marino, you can’t change how I feel about you.”
He tilts his head up to the pitch-black sky, not a star within it.
“I don’t deserve you,” he whispers softly.
“And yet, you have me.”
He shakes his head and releases a heavy sigh, and together, we head toward the entrance and walk inside.
The bell rings as a middle-aged woman peers up, popping her chewing gum as she gives us a cold once-over.
“Yeah?” Her black-rimmed glasses sit slanted on her wide nose.
“We need a room,” Raph says.
“Mm-hmm.” She taps a few keys on the laptop in front of her, a pen sticking out from the top of one of her ears.
“It’s eighty. A night.” She pitches me with a disapproving look. “We don’t do hours here.”
“Good thing,” he snickers. “’Cause she isn’t my whore.”
For a moment, her brows shoot up, and then she’s back to looking at us with disgust.
“I’m paying for the week. Will extend as needed.” He removes his wallet and hands her a wad of cash. “Keep the change.”
That makes her cold, dead eyes glisten like diamonds, and a smile finally crawls to her thin, chapped lips. She grabs the cash and pops it into the register, handing him a key card.
“Room number twelve. It’s got one bed. Will that be a problem?” She eyes him curiously.
“You don’t have any with two queens?” he asks, and she slowly creeps her gaze toward me.
“No. Bedbugs. It’s what we’ve got. You want it or not?”
“We’ll take it,” he says.
“Mm-hmm.” She returns to chewing her gum and ignoring us.
“Wow,” I mutter under my breath as he takes my hand in his and pulls me back out into the street.
We move from door to door, looking for our room.
“Twelve should be here.” He points up ahead.
Nerves swallow up my gut at the thought of sharing a bed with him. Unless he plans to sleep on the floor again, which by the appearance of this place would be a big mistake…
A few more rooms, and we’re in front of ours, a blue door with a tilted number twelve on it. He scans the room key, and as soon as we walk in, he flips on the light.
Okay, so the inside isn’t as horrifying as I had pictured. Minus the bright red stain on the gray rug that looks as though a murder happened here. The bed is plain brown wood with a floral yellow comforter. I guess that was their attempt at livening up the place. Can’t say it’s working.
“I know this isn’t the Hilton,” he says, “but we have to stay off the grid. And tomorrow I’ll have Michael get one of the guys to drop off a new car for us. We can’t use the one I was driving anymore.”
“Okay.” I plop myself down on the mattress. “You think they’ll find us again?”
He draws closer and lowers himself beside me. “I’ll do everything in my power to prevent that from happening.”
And this time as he gazes into my eyes, he doesn’t attempt to tuck his hand into mine or hold me. I nod, glancing down into my lap. In his arms, I feel safety, and without them, I feel bare and cold. Does he regret what happened in the shower? Is he trying to push me away?
“You should get some rest,” he tells me.
But at the very thought of falling asleep, being vulnerable to our enemies, my body clamps up, and I shiver. Even knowing he’ll be near does nothing to force the dread away.
He starts to remove his sneakers, and I remove mine, neither of us bothering to change our clothes since we had changed right before we started packing. Slowly, I slide into the bed, my cheek hitting the icy pillowcase before it warms against my skin.
And instead of making himself comfortable on the floor, he does something I really didn’t think he would. He lies beside me and gets real close, until the heat from his body warms me from the inside.
“What are you doing?” I whisper.
“Sleeping beside you.” He throws an arm around me.
“Since when?” I breathe, shivers coasting down my arm.
I wait and wait for his response, wondering if he’ll actually utter a word.
His mouth presses to the back of my head. “Since the moment I almost lost you.”
RAPH
Propping my head on my palm, I watch her sleep, tucked against me. She’s on her back, her full lips slightly parted, chest gently rising, the blanket casually draped around her middle.
She drifted off with ease, as though all she needed was me. I’m willing to give her that if it means she gets some rest, even while it’s pure torture for me.
Her nipples poke through her shirt, having me wondering if she likes them sucked on.
Does she even know what she likes? What makes her feel good? Bet I can teach her. Show her what her body can do. Maybe I should be the one to take her virginity. Make it special for her. Make it right. Teach her things for…
For what? For some other asshole to reap the fucking benefits?
I ball my other hand and grind my teeth. She should be mine.
I reach a hand, the featherlike touch of my knuckles slowly rolling down the slope of her high cheekbone.
“You’re so beautiful,” I whisper.
She stirs and lets out a moan.
I snap my hand away.
“Mmm,” she drawls, the sway of her voice a raspy thing.
Did she know I was touching her? Does she know I’m aching for her? Fuck, I hope I didn’t wake her. That’s the last thing she needs. Her wound is slowly healing, and she is in a lot less pain now.
Her body stretches as she lets out a series of tight moans, her knees shifting under the blanket, her hands gripping the sheets.
“Yes…” she mumbles.
My pulse speeds.
Is she having…?
A sultry sigh leaves her lips, hot breaths escaping between them, the blanket now rolling down to her calves.
God damn it, she’s definitely having one of those dreams. My cock throbs and my heart hammers as I continue to watch her getting turned on.
Who the hell is she thinking about? I want to kill him already.
My ragged breaths consume me as she continues to cry out lowly in her sleep, pushing her knees into one another.
Without a second thought, I brush the pads of my fingers over the tops of her thighs, so close to where I bet she’s warm and wet.
The bulge between my legs grows stiffer every second I watch her, wanting to wake her up and ask who she’s dreaming about, who’s making her feel this good.
Suddenly, her hand reaches to where my fingers still trace her, and she grips my wrist.
“Raph…” she cries.
And before I can process the fact that it was my name she was just gasping, her eyes fly open.
“Hey,” I smirk, keeping my cool even as my heart pounds, wanting to kiss away that puzzled look on her face and replace it with something else.
“Hi…uh…what time is it?” She quickly takes her hand back and drags the blanket back over her breasts, denying me the view.
But the image of her naked in that bathroom is forever seared into my head, and there’s nothing she can do about that.
“It’s late, little one. Go back to bed.”
“Was I…um…” Her throat tremors as she tries to finish that.
But I’m not about to embarrass her.
“Were you having a bad dream?” I bring her hand up to my mouth and kiss the top of it.
Her chest rises with a tremble, and she bites that lower lip while I hold back a groan.
“Yeah…uhh…very bad dream.” She clears her throat. “That’s what it was.”
If the lights were on, I bet she’d be blushing.
“How about I hold you and keep the monsters away?” The words fly out of my mouth before I could stop them.
Damn idiot. She’s going to feel you rock hard.
But my heart doesn’t seem to care right now. All it wants is her.
“Are you sure you want to do that?” she breathes.
I place her palm over my chest. I bet she feels it—the racing of my heart for her. “Never been surer of anything in my life.”
Except that I love you.
Her loud breaths fill the silence. And even in the dark, I can see her staring right into my eyes, wanting me with just as much force.
“Lascia che ti stringa mentre dormi.” Let me hold you while you sleep.
“Okay,” she softly rasps.
And wordlessly, I slide up beside her, my front to her back, and I hold her tight, wondering how I can possibly let her go.