Chapter 20 – Two Weeks Later
NICOLETTE
TWO WEEKS LATER
I’m in his arms and he’s in mine, slow dancing in our shitty motel room, but we’re creating memories I once only wished we could make.
I know what waits for us outside of these walls is scary, but right now it feels as though we’re a real couple and I hold on to that with all my might.
“You’re a good dancer,” I say softly, my cheek resting against his powerful chest, his hands clasped around the small of my back as we sway together to a sultry melody.
My eyes closed, I’m consumed with the enormity of my feelings for this man, so much so they pervade my soul.
These past weeks have been the stuff of dreams. We’ve laughed.
We’ve talked. It’s like we’re back to how it used to be.
Except now we also have a ton of sex, which I’m definitely not complaining about.
Sex with him is magnificent. I may not have experience, but I’m pretty sure he’s the best there is.
“It’s only because I’m dancing with you.” He kisses the top of my head.
It’s these little things that make my heart come alive. These sentimental touches, his sweet words, those tender kisses that’ll never get old.
“I like this dress on you,” he tells me, his softened gaze roaming down my curves.
“Thank you.” My cheeks warm at the compliment, the red knee-length dress fluttering as he spins me.
He bought it for me when he went shopping one day. Said as soon as he saw it, he knew it’d be perfect on me. He was right.
“You did good picking this one.” I tip up a single brow. “I’m kinda running out of room for the list of talents on your résumé.”
“Résumé, huh?” He narrows a playful gaze, his palms roughly clasping my hips. “What else is on this résumé you’ve not told me you’re writing?”
I press my lips tightly with a laugh and he grabs my jaw, a darkly domineering gaze within his eyes that sends my gut into a chaotic mess of emotions.
“Well,” I stammer, his unrelenting gaze making me all sorts of nervous. “For starters, you’re very talented in the kitchen.”
“Uh-huh…” His thumb comes up and runs across my chin. “What else?”
“Well…um…” Suddenly, I get insanely shy and my gaze darts to the ground.
The rest of it is pretty dirty, and I’m not used to talking that way.
He chuckles and tugs my face up, forcing me to peek up at him.
“Finish that sentence,” he demands. “I have a feeling I’m going to like where this is going.”
“Can I close my eyes first?” I grimace.
“Nope.” His smirk curves over his mouth, that handsome face so beautiful to look at, I wonder how someone like him could want someone like me. “I need to see your eyes when you say it. Because I swear, whatever comes out of that mouth is guaranteed to make my cock hard.”
“Geez…” My eyes widen. “Want to warn me before we start talking about your…you know…”
“My what?” His lips twitch. “Going to have to say it.”
I narrow my eyes with a shake of my head. “You’re the worst.”
“Insufferable. Just the way you like me.” He drops his mouth to my forehead and inhales deep. “Goddamn, you smell good.”
“Distracting enough that you’ll forget what we’ve been talking about?”
“Not a chance in hell.” He tilts back with a small laugh, waiting for me to answer, and I have a sudden urge to kiss him.
My mouth widens with a grin, and I rise on my tiptoes and press my mouth to his, kissing him slow.
He groans, grabbing a fistful of my ass, and sucks my lower lip into his mouth, teeth grazing as he gradually lets it go.
“I see what you’re trying to do.” His voice is gruff, brushing his mouth with mine. “But you’re not getting away with it that easy.”
He kisses that spot under my earlobe that makes me crazy.
Growing breathless, I lace my fingers through his hair, pulling him closer, and he growls against my neck, kissing and sucking me there.
“For starters,” I whisper. “You have a very talented tongue. I think you broke me for all other men.”
He pauses and pushes off, staring at me like molten lava.
“What men?” He grabs my jaw with a possessive hand, searching my eyes. “There will be no other men.”
He says it like it’s a declaration, a law made into fact.
“I’m just saying, just in case.” I tease him with a smile turning up one side of my mouth.
And I swear his pupils dilate, his gaze hot and dangerous.
“You don’t need a just in case,” he grits, his fingers biting deeper into my skin.
His chest heaves while his mouth lowers to mine, his hot breaths fanning over my lips.
“You’re mine, little one.” He tugs my bottom lip between his teeth, his eyes daring me to prove him wrong. “All mine. And don’t you forget it.”
Then he kisses me. My God, does he ever.
My heart stills.
All the air leaves my lungs, the way it always does when his lips touch mine.
And that term of endearment, the one I used to hate… I don’t hate it anymore. It no longer holds the same meaning as it once did. Now, I look forward to hearing it. I’m his. His little one. And though he may not be perfect, he has the softest heart and the purest soul.
We’re both breathless as he wrenches away, gazing at me with so much emotion I’m afraid to look away.
And right now, in this moment, it feels like nothing can tear us apart.
Yet a little part of me still wonders, would he choose me if he had a choice between my sister and me? I wish she were here so I could know that for myself. It’s like my self-esteem won’t let me be happy. Won’t allow me to believe that for once in my life someone wants me over her.
“Can I ask you something?” I breathe, my pulse racing.
“Anything.”
“Promise not to lie?”
“I’d never lie. Least of all to you.”
I nod, and with my gut roiling, I ask him the question I already regret asking. “If she were alive, would you ever try again with her…even after everything?”
If the answer is yes, please lie to me.
The very thought makes me sick.
Seconds trail by.
And all he does is stare.
“How could you ask me that?” he finally says, appearing offended. “I don’t want you to even think about her. She doesn’t get to stand between us anymore.” He sighs. “She means nothing and she’s dead.”
He pulls me against him, a palm clasped to the back of my head, holding me against his chest, his heart beating rapidly.
But in all that time, I can’t get his answer out of my head. Because he didn’t actually say no, now, did he?
While he’s in the shower, the water pounding, I force myself to forget the discussion about my sister from earlier. I shouldn’t have asked. It doesn’t matter. He’s right. She’s dead. What difference does it make now? But anxiety ripples through me at the thought of not knowing the truth.
No, I have to stop this. Nothing good will come from it.
I smile as I recall that day he took me to my dance. Does he even remember? It was the very first time he danced with me. I can still smell his expensive cologne. The black tux and matching bow tie he wore. I thought I won the lottery when he offered to take me to my homecoming dance.
I think that was the night I truly fell in love with him, except at the time, I didn’t realize how deep that love ran.
FIVE YEARS AGO
AGE 16
“I’m not going, Brenda,” I tell her. “Leo isn’t going. You have your date. I don’t want to feel like some annoying third wheel.”
“Oh, stop, already. You’re never a third wheel with us. Keagan adores you, and he said he didn’t mind if you joined us.”
“Well, I mind. I don’t want to be the only girl going to a dance without a date.”
She sighs, knowing when I make up my mind, not even an avalanche can stop me.
“What if you go with Keagan’s brother? He has the hots for you. He would be ready in ten minutes if we told him you wanted him to go with you.”
“Seriously, Brenda? He’s a freshman, and I’m a junior. Hello, social suicide.”
“Okay. Fine. You’re right. Dumb idea. I just really want you to come,” she practically whines.
And I really did want to go, but it’s not happening now. The dance is in an hour, and I’m in my pajamas, hair in a messy bun, stuffing my face with pretzels.
I pop another into my mouth. “Brenda, I swear I’m fine. I’m just going to stay in my room and watch TV. Go to the dance and have fun. Then tell me all about it.”
She exhales dramatically. I can almost see her scrunching her thick brows, as black as her hair.
She’s one of those lucky people. Gorgeous olive skin, silky hair.
The guys go crazy for her curves, but she’s only got eyes for Keagan.
He’s the only boyfriend she’s ever had. Right out of freshman year. I bet she’s going to marry him one day.
And me? I’ll still be sitting in my PJs stuffing my face with pretzels. I’ll probably be one of those cat ladies.
“Anyway, I’ve gotta go, Brenda.”
“Oh yeah? Where to? Got important things to do in your pink fuzzy pajamas?”
I look around, my heart suddenly racing.
“Are you spying on me or something? Wait, are you in my closet, watching me?” I tease this time.
“Ha-ha.” She definitely just rolled her eyes. A girl knows her bestie. “I know because I know your ass. It’s the only pair you ever wear. Don’t you have like two of them?”
“Five…” I grimace.
I like what I like. Sue me.
She laughs. “Reconsider. It isn’t too late. Please,” she begs.
“Okay, yeah, I will totally think about it.”
“No you won’t.” She snickers.
“Like you said, you know me well.”
“Fine, bitch. Gotta go do my hair. Love you.”
“Love you too.” I end the call, dropping the cell on my bed.
Well, this will be the most boring night ever. My parents are out with friends. Bianca is working or whoring around. Probably whoring around. I saw some dude dropping her home once when she didn’t think I was here. And I’m pretty sure Raph has no idea, and I can’t be the one to tell him.
Fuck my sister. I hope she gets what’s coming to her. Hopefully that comes in a form of itchy crabs. Only a crazy person would cheat on someone like Raph. She’s lucky he even wants her.