Chapter 27
RAPH
It’s only been a few hours since I found out he’s got her. I’ve lost count of how many walls I’ve made holes in, and it’s not even my house. Michael has been gracious enough to not kick my ass for busting up his place, but he must understand what I’m going through.
Elsie isn’t here with him, either. But he sent her away for her own safety. Again, my father was the reason. However, at least he knows where she is.
I don’t.
Nicolette could be fucking dead by now. My heart feels like it’s being shredded right in my goddamn chest. If a piece of her is harmed, I’ll make my father suffer for years before he dies. I will make his world a nightmare.
Where could he be hiding her? Everyone on our team is looking, trying to find her, but coming up empty.
“They’re almost here,” Michael informs me. “Mom just called.”
My stomach dips. I haven’t seen my mother for about a year, not since I started the war with the Irish. Same goes for Sophia. I don’t even know how to look my mother in the face, knowing he was doing that with Bianca under both our noses.
The door swings, and I instantly hear the pounding of footsteps and a little girl’s voice.
“Where is he? Where is he?” she calls excitedly, and a smile grows on my face.
I rise to my feet, emotions swelling in my chest. And when she appears in the doorway, her eyes as wide as her mouth, she rushes for me, and my arms open for her.
“Uncle Raph!”
I tuck a palm around the back of her head as soon as she’s against me.
“I missed you so much,” she says with a whisper.
I hold her tighter. “Not as much as I missed you, my favorite girl.”
She peers up. “Promise you’ll never leave again.”
“I promise.” Affection tethers to every beat of my heart, and I kiss her gently on the forehead, hoping that one day, I can be a father too.
Mom wipes tears from under her eyes as she approaches, and with a cry, she throws her arms around me and holds on.
“I’m sorry,” she breathes.
“Me too, Ma. Me too.”
While Michael helps Sophia get ready for bed, Mom and I sit on the sofa beside each other, draped in silence, unable to say a thing to one another.
I’m riddled with humiliation. What can I really say?
“I owe you a huge apology, Raph.” She sighs, and it gets me to look at her.
“You don’t.”
“I do.” She moves closer on my left and places a hand on my shoulder. “For years, that bastard tortured you. Beat you, and as your mother…” She chokes up. “As your mother, it was my job to protect you, and I failed. I failed my own son.”
“I don’t blame you, Ma.” My palm lands on the top of her hand, still settled on my shoulder. “You couldn’t do anything against him.”
“That’s not true.” She shakes her head, a finger swiping under her lashes. “I could’ve tried to kill him.”
I snicker, a smile fighting my mouth. “We both know that probably wouldn’t have worked and I’d have lost the only parent I ever had.”
Her brows furrow and tears leak past her cheeks. “I love you, Raph. You know that, right?”
“Love you too, Ma.”
She nods thoughtfully. “I want him dead.”
“We all do. But I need to find Nicolette first.”
“I can’t believe what he was doing.” She inhales deeply and grimaces. “And Bianca? That hussy. I don’t like speaking ill of the dead, but I hated her.”
I pinch my brow with two fingers, feeling a damn migraine coming on.
“I never liked her, you know,” Mom continues. “Am I allowed to say that now?”
“Sure.” I chuckle dryly.
“Nicolette is a good one. I approve.” Mom gives me a small grin.
A heavy sigh leaves my lungs.
“What’s wrong, honey?”
“I don’t know, Ma. Everything?” Elbows propped on my knees, I glance over at her.
“I thought I could be with her. Now…I don’t know.
” I pause, choosing the right words. “I can’t even keep her safe.
What will our life be like?” I drag in a long breath.
“This world isn’t meant for women like her.
And then there’s the age difference, or that I was married to her damn sister. ”
“Cut yourself some slack.” Mom draws closer. “Bianca was sleeping with your father. I say at this point, you do whatever the hell you want.”
I chuckle.
“I’m serious, Raph. If she makes you happy, then you should follow your heart, because years from now, you will regret it. Take it from me.” Her features grow tense.
I straighten my back, sensing her change in mood. “What does that mean?”
She gives me a faraway look and shrugs. “It means, I was you once. In love with someone who wasn’t your father. But unlike you, I didn’t have a choice. I was forced to marry him, and to this day, I haven’t forgotten the man who stole my heart.” Her eyes glisten as she smiles sadly.
“Ma…I had no idea.”
“No one does,” she says tearfully. “No one but my mother.”
“And she didn’t let you marry whoever this guy was?”
“No.” She scoffs bitterly. “I was arranged to marry your father when I was eighteen. I didn’t have a say. I had to leave this guy behind.”
“I’m sorry.”
She squeezes my shoulder. “Hey, I have you boys, and I will never ever regret anything. I just don’t want you to be me, looking back on your life and wondering what if.
You have something I didn’t: a choice. Grab it and don’t let it go.
” She clasps my face with a palm and kisses my cheek.
“When you find that girl, marry her. Trust me.” She winks. “She’s one of the good ones.”
“How come you never liked Bianca?” I ask, just as she starts to rise.
She sneers. “Because the first time I met her, she was spitting out my chicken parm into a napkin.”
I burst with a laugh. Yeah, that would do it.
Once Ma’s out the door, I consider what she said, wondering if being with Nicolette is something that’s right or if I’m being selfish.
Michael’s footsteps come marching down the stairs, and he looks ashen once he’s standing before me.
“She’s waiting for you,” he informs me.
Sophia insisted I read to her tonight. She wants nothing to do with her father, and it’s slowly killing him. She’s angry at Michael for Elsie not being here, and she’s not letting him forget it.
“She hates me.”
I rarely ever see Michael like this. He’s really broken up about letting Elsie go.
I slap him on the shoulder as I get to my feet. “She doesn’t hate you. She loves you. She’s just upset. She’ll get over it.”
He gives me a look that says there’s no way in hell that kid will let him out of the doghouse. My niece takes her stubbornness from her father.
“You can always get Elsie to come back,” I tell him, chuckling.
“Shut up.”
I’m still laughing as I start for the stairs, hoping I can talk some sense into my little niece. My brother is in pain. Losing the woman he cares about is slowly destroying him and having his daughter’s wrath on top of it is not helping.
Approaching, I knock on her door.
“Who is it?” she asks, her voice tight, like she’s afraid it’s Michael.
“Uncle Raph.”
“You may enter.”
I stifle my laughter and push the door open.
She’s sitting up in a light pink sleeping gown, a book already in hand.
“Can you read to me every night?” she asks once I approach.
“I can try.” I settle on her side of the bed. “But I think your daddy enjoys it just as much.”
She rolls her eyes. “Well, I don’t want him to anymore.”
“And why is that?” I take the book and scoop an arm under her, tugging her close.
“Because…” Her tone loses that stiffness, and in its place is a broken little girl.
“Because why?” I tilt up her chin, and her eyes water over.
“He sent her away!” she cries. “He sent Elsie away!”
Her sobs grow and I leave the book behind and bring her onto my lap, where she cries long and hard.
“I miss her so much.” She sniffles. “She was supposed to be my mommy. She loved me.”
“She still loves you. It’s just…” I battle with what to say to make her feel a little better. “She had to go for a little bit, but she may be back.”
Knowing my brother, he won’t put her in danger. He’ll suffer just to protect her.
“Maybe you can talk to Elsie and make her come back?” She stares into me, hope bathing the brown hues of her gaze, her long lashes fluttering, tears caught within them.
“I’ll see what I can do, sweetheart.”
I can’t tell her no. I won’t break her heart more than it’s already broken.
“Thanks, Uncle Raph. Can’t wait for you to meet her.” She swipes under her eyes. “She’s so nice and pretty.”
“I bet she is.” I kiss her tenderly on her forehead. “Now…” I lower her beside me. “How about that story?”
“Okay.” She perks up a twinge.
“What’s this one about?” I examine the book, a giant green dragon on the cover.
“It’s the one with the dragon who burns the whole place down just to save the princess.”
Sounds about right.