Chapter 36
NICOLETTE
Nervously, the following day, I wait for her to open the door. It’s been over a year since we saw each other and I’m sure she’s been worried. She’s one of the only people who would be.
When the door swings open, Brenda shrieks, a baby girl with black curls on her hip. The last time I saw her, she was pregnant, and we had picked the baby name together.
“You’re alive!” she shrieks, grabbing me with one arm and hugging me so tight, I can’t breathe. “I swear, I was going crazy.” She draws back. “Thinking the worst.”
Her tearful voice has my own emotions surfacing. Her deep brown eyes glisten, her black hair rolled up in a messy bun.
“I’m sorry I look like shit and the house is even worse.” She laughs. “But, biatch, you’re alive, and…”
She gapes behind me, finding Raph standing there, a few feet away.
“Damn. I didn’t see you there, Raph. How are you?”
“Brenda.” He nods with a tight smile. “I see you’re doing well.” His eyes go to the baby, and his smile instantly grows.
“You wanna hold her?” she asks him.
He’s moving closer until he’s right beside me. “I would love to.”
My heart instantly aches. He really wants a child, and I don’t know if we’ll ever be able to have any.
“Good. Because I need a break. She’s heavy!”
He takes her into his arms and holds her against his black wool coat.
“Hi there,” he says, and the little girl gives him a toothy grin.
“Oh, she likes you,” Brenda says, walking into the house with us close behind. “You’re in trouble now, Raph.”
“I can manage,” he replies, his tone as soft as silk. “I like kids.”
“Mmm-hmm.” Brenda gives me one of her knowing looks over her shoulder. “I can see that, all right.”
“How old is Mila now?” I quickly change the subject before she gets nosy.
We settle on the red, velvet sofa, me sandwiched between them.
Her place is small, yet cozy, pictures of her with Mila and her husband, Keagan, donning the walls of the den.
She ended up marrying her high school boyfriend.
She calls herself a walking cliché. But I think it’s sweet. How many people can truly say that?
“She’s nine months now. Can you believe it?” She’s glancing fondly at her daughter, who’s playing with Raph’s nose.
But he looks like he’s in heaven.
Knots form in my stomach. Will we ever have that?
“So, uh, you gonna tell me what happened to you after you got to my grandparents’ house?” She tucks her feet under her. “And why you’re in my living room with Mr. Hunk over there?” She pops a thick brow.
I stifle a laugh when Raph stares at her with amusement.
“What?” She throws a hand in the air. “I’m married. I’m not dead. And homegirl over here, has called you a lot worse.”
That gets his attention. He places Mila on his knee and bounces her while she squeals. “Did she now? And what did she say about me?”
He gives me a devilish smirk that has my insides flipping.
“Girl code. Can’t tell ya.” Brenda raises her chin and gives me a wink.
“How about I pay for a sitter so you and your husband can have a night out?”
She draws her lips back and grits her teeth. “Tempting, but I have a sitter, and she’s free.”
“You draw a hard bargain, Brenda.” He considers his options thoughtfully. “What about all expenses paid to any restaurant you want for three nights? I’ll even get you reservations to any overnight hotel if you want it.”
Her eyes widen.
“Don’t you dare, Brenda,” I gasp, elbowing her. “We’re friends. You don’t sell out your friends for food.”
“Yeah…but there’s that rooftop restaurant that we’ve been dying to go to for months now, and they’re always booked.”
“The Ribbon Room?” A tight, knowing grin lines those sinful lips.
“That’s the one!”
He takes out his cell and starts pressing buttons.
“What are you doing?” I hurriedly ask, palming his thigh, and his muscles jerk beneath my touch.
He looks straight at me as someone answers. “Hello? Antonio?”
I register a male voice coming through. “Hey. Yeah, how you doin’, Raph?”
The whole time, he eyes me with a satisfied look on his face, and Brenda’s laughing her ass off.
“I need a favor,” he continues. “I have some friends who want to come by your restaurant tomorrow night.”
Brenda is practically bouncing in her seat, giving him a thumbs-up.
“Of course!” the man replies. “We’d love to have them. How’s tomorrow at eight?”
With a narrowed stare, I shake my head at her.
“Sell-out,” I whisper.
She shrugs and her face lights up.
“Great, tomorrow at eight will work. They’ll have my private table with all the works.”
He pauses while the man says, “Absolutely, sir. We will make it extra special for them.”
“I appreciate it, Antonio. I will be sure to stop by very soon with my girlfriend, Nicolette.”
I gasp. He made us public.
Brenda squeezes my arm.
“Can’t wait to meet her,” the man tells him.
“Thank you,” he says, eyes warm like the sun as they search mine. “She’s special.”
“I bet.”
“Say hello to your beautiful wife and those kids.”
“Thank you, sir,” Antonio says before Raph ends the call.
“So, Brenda…” Raph hits her with a satisfied expression. “Are you going to tell me what my girl has been saying about me?”
“Your girl, huh?” Her gaze bounces between us.
“That’s right.” He slips the phone back in his pocket.
She jerks back as she stares at me. “Bitch, you been holding out on me?”
“It’s new.” My face flushes.
“Okay…” She backs up into the sofa. “We need to properly catch up after I fill him in on all the dirty things you’ve said about him.”
“I hate you.” I shake my head.
“I know.” She hooks her arm through mine and smiles. “But you also love me.”
“Unfortunately.” I roll my eyes.
She glances past me at Raph. “So, the first time she told me she had a crush on you, she also called you a god.”
“Is that so…” Heavy-lidded eyes meet mine, and my body comes alive with tingles spreading down the length of me.
Then she’s filling him in on all the other things I’ve said, while I’m sitting there watching the man I love and my best friend talk like they’re already good friends.
And I’m happy. Truly happy. This is family, and it’s all I need.
Hours later, and we’re driving away from Brenda’s and going somewhere I had no plans to go. But Raph convinced me I needed closure. That I would be happy to get it over with.
My foot bounces while his hand squeezes mine, his other managing the wheel.
“It’ll be okay, tesoro mio. I won’t let anyone hurt you.” He gives me a quick glance, conviction and devotion imprinted in his gaze.
I know he won’t. He’s always been there for me, and he won’t fail me now. But this is still hard.
Facing my parents after feeling completely unloved and emotionally abandoned by them is scary. Then throw in actually confronting them about it and telling them I’m in love with their favorite daughter’s husband… I can just imagine how well that’s going to go.
“We’re here,” he tells me, slowing to a stop in front of their driveway.
The two-story ivory house with blue shutters stares right at me, and nostalgia hits all at once.
It’s funny how even through the bad, our mind grasps on to the good memories.
Like when Dad brought lobsters home one Christmas, even though it was a huge expense, and one of them jumped out of the bag.
Or the time Raph and I made tiramisu together in our small kitchen and I actually mastered it.
Things weren’t all bad in this house. I held on to that for as long as I could.
“Are you ready?” He brings my hand to his lips and kisses my knuckles, his eyes concentrating on mine.
“I don’t think I’ll ever be ready.” I drag in a shaky inhale. “What if they don’t want to see me?”
“Then we’ll never come back here again.” He cups my cheek. “You’re an amazing person, Nicolette. If they don’t see that, then they’re not worth your time. Family isn’t always blood. I’m your family now, and you can always depend on me.”
My heart lurches and emotions grip me in the wake of his words. “I know you are, and you’re mine too. It’s just hard. They’re my parents, you know?”
A knot forms in my throat.
“I know.” His features fill with compassion. “And I’m sorry. But you have to face them and tell them how they’ve made you feel. Don’t keep it inside. You have for too long, and I don’t want to see you carry that pain anymore.”
He’s right. I need to do this for myself. With a small smile, I tighten my lips and face my own demons.
“I’m ready,” I tell him, not sure if it’s even the truth.
My hand lands on the door, and before I can open it, he says, “I’ll get that for you.”
It’s silly. I know I can get my own door, but him wanting to… I don’t know, it’s sweet. He climbs out, and seconds later, his hand holds mine and he’s helping me to my feet.
I straighten the blue peacoat he bought me, and together, we climb the three stone steps and I ring the bell.
My stomach churns. I can’t believe I’m doing this.
“Coming,” my father grumbles, his heavy footsteps trudging closer.
The nearer he gets, the sicker I feel.
Raph squeezes my hand and leans into my ear. “You’re okay. I’m right here.”
The cadence of his voice lessens the nervous butterflies scurrying in my belly. But it’s not enough to bury the anxiety crawling through me.
The lock clicks, and the unassuming brown door creaks open. And there is my father, a beer in hand, wiping his mouth, looking like he just drank through a distillery.
“Ni-Nicolette?” he stammers. “That you?”
“Yes, Dad, it’s me.” My reply comes with surprise tethered to it.
He appears as though he’s a shell of the man he once was.
“Who’s that, Elio?” I hear Mom call, marching toward us.
“It’s Nicolette,” he slurs.
“Oh.”
That’s all she says. One word.
It stings.
Raph grasps my hand even tighter.
Seconds later, she’s there, staring at me with indifference. Her auburn strands are set in a low ponytail, her bare face assessing me as though I’m not her daughter, but one of those salespeople she’d rather see gone.
“Raph.” She reverts her attention to him with a hint of a smile. One she couldn’t afford me. Her own daughter. “What are you doing here?”
“May we come in?” he asks grimly.
“Uh, sure.”