Chapter 3
Chapter
Three
Gina
I had no idea how I ended up at a bar in the very south of Mississippi, but I was sipping on my third Martini and, from the looks of things, not leaving any time soon.
It was karaoke night, and as soon as the man on the mic wrapped up his rendition of Otis Redding’s “The Dock of the Bay,” I would be taking his place on stage.
Open mic was usually reserved for drunk, talentless people who strolled into bars looking for a good laugh, but this man was full of talent.
His voice was a deep baritone, and the raspiness that wrapped around his words made his rendition surprisingly calming to listen to.
The way he held the audience captive with each word made it evident that he’d done this before.
Maybe not on this stage, singing the same song, but I was sure he’d graced many stages before tonight.
Once he brought his performance to an end, the crowd clapped, obviously loving what he’d done just as much as I did.
“Now that was one hell of a song you just sung there, Big Mike!” The crowd erupted, as they agreed with everything the host said. Since I already knew I was next to go to the stage, I made my way from my seat to take my place. “Y’all give it up for Ms. Gina May!”
The DJ already had my song queued up, and I was ready to go until the last words I’d spoken to my parents replayed in my mind.
The reason for my call was not to end the relationship that we’d been holding together by strings of hope and prayer.
I simply wanted to see if they would have time to slow down to have a birthday dinner with me.
That was all I was asking for. One day, one dinner, on my birthday, but I couldn’t even get that.
Yesterday was the last day that I would beg for love that was supposed to come freely.
I let my eyes roam over the bar as I gripped the mic in my hand and better positioned the stand that sat on in front of me.
The only time I felt close to my parents was when I was on stage, with a mic in my hand.
Sadly, they were the first thing that popped into my head when I signed my name on the form for approval to go up.
Anytime I was on stage, I felt like I was right next to my mom, just as I was as a little girl, singing my heart out with my dad smiling, standing to the side, egging me on.
It was one thing to miss your parents, and they weren’t there on this earth, but missing them, knowing that they could come to see me at the snap of their fingers was a totally different thing.
Knowing that my parents could see me and wouldn’t, or that they could make time for me if they wanted to, but they didn’t, was what hurt most. Also, knowing that your parents were somewhere out there in the world, living life without you, was the worst thing that a child could ever imagine, and that was what I was feeling right now.
Packing my things and leaving their house was the only way I knew how to take a stand.
Being out on my own was me standing up for myself.
This was about not letting anyone dip in and out of my life at will, parents included.
I was worthy of the people I loved staying around.
I was worth keeping in contact with, and if my parents didn’t see that, then that was their bad.
It was my time to go out into the world and find people who wanted to be around me.
Gripping the mic tighter, I positioned myself as firmly as I could and let the song that I’d been working on for months rip from between my lips. My voice trembled for the first three lines, but it didn’t take long for me to find my confidence. I just had to remember I was born to sing.
“I wonder if I was truly loved, would I feel it
Would I recognize the signs of its realness
Would I hold on real tight until it finish
Would I revel in the love of a real man?”
I sang the lyrics with my whole heart because this song painted the perfect picture of everything I was feeling.
It let me release all the emotions that I felt inside and helped me come to terms with what I had to do next.
Although the song spoke about romantic love, the theme still applied.
So many women I knew struggled with loving a good man because of the lack of love in their homes growing up.
I knew I had to heal from that before I could accept a man’s love, and I was dedicated to doing it.
The more I sang, the more the crowd clapped along with me.
It was like they were feeling my pain too.
Getting that kind of reaction from a crowd on an open mic night was all I needed to let me know that I was in the right place.
As I blended the melody and slowed at the end, the crowd stood and gave me a standing ovation.
I thanked everyone who was clapping as I exited the stage.
Clapping for a stranger at an open mic may have been small to them, but it was big to me.
No one had ever heard me sing before, not even my mom and dad.
Not as an adult anyway. I was using this mixtape as my big coming out, which was why their not coming home to hear it really cut deep.
As soon as I left the stage, I walked straight to the bar. After pouring my heart out, I needed a drink, and a drink needed me. I wasn’t much of a drinker, so I was going overboard tonight, and I wasn’t making any apologies for it.
“I’ll take a shot of Patrón, please,” I spoke directly to the bartender, not paying attention to who else was at the bar. Having liquor hit the back of my throat was the only thing I was focused on.
“Judging from that performance, I’d say you’ve had enough drinks tonight.” The stranger’s comment caught me off guard because I thought I killed that performance. Hell, so did the crowd.
“And what was wrong with my performance?” I stood up straight with one hand on my hip, waiting for his response.
“A little sloppy, but I’m sure it would have been better if you hadn’t had so many drinks.” He turned away from the bar and faced me. Although straightforward, he was also fine as hell.
For a moment, I just stared at him, unable to find the words for a reply. I didn’t know if I should get smart or be polite. On one hand, I didn’t need anybody telling me when or when not to drink, but on the other hand, his type of fine could’ve made any girl consider her words.
I lived most of my life alone and had been making my own decisions long before I was old enough to do so. I didn’t need permission to do anything at this point. Still, something about the handsome stranger sitting in front of me told me, when a man like him spoke, I should listen.
“Lord forbid a girl needs a drink. You can have shot glasses lined up in front of you, but I can’t?” I asked, switching from one leg to the other and popping my hip out. I smiled slightly so he would know I wasn’t being standoffish, but I did expect an answer.
He stood and closed the space between us so his face was now only a few inches away from mine.
“I’m just looking out for you. I know better than to tell a lady what to do, so if you want to sit here and drink until your heart’s content, have at it.
But I’ll be sitting right here next to you.
I can tell you need someone to keep an eye on you. ”
“Is that a promise?”
“That’s a promise. Looking at you, I think we both need a friend tonight, and if you listen to my problems, I’ll listen to yours.”
“Deal.” I stuck my hand out for him to shake, and he wasted no time grabbing it.
He was wearing a sexy smirk that highlighted the dimples in his dark-chocolate cheeks. His teeth put mine to shame with how bright they were, and I took pride in how gorgeous my smile was. My parents had paid a pretty penny to make sure it was perfect, but still, he had me beat by a long shot.
He pulled out a stool for me to sit, and I finally tore my gaze from his mouth, only for it to travel the rest of his frame.
His broad shoulders and firm handshake were a testament to his muscular build.
I could tell he worked out, but he wasn’t the type to make the gym his whole personality.
Weight training looked good on him, but if I had to guess, I would’ve said a lot of his build was natural.
“You can put her Patrón on my tab,” he said as he took the seat next to me. “I am Ramel, by the way.”
“Regina, but my friends call me Gina.”
“Regina and Ramel; that sounds good together.”
“I can’t disagree.” He was smooth as hell, and at this point, I would’ve pretty much agreed to anything he said.
I wasn’t the type to be smitten over a man as soon as I met him.
Hell, I had been rich my whole life, and no amount of money attracted me to a person.
I’d also been around some of the most beautiful people in the world, so even with as fine as Ramel was, I’d seen it before.
Still, there was something about him that pulled me in.
He had a strong and silent look to him. When I first noticed him, he was sitting by himself at the bar with plenty of drinks.
I hadn’t noticed a bunch of women flocking around or even a gang of men.
Him being alone was a turn on to me. I hated a man who turned his head at everything that walked by, and I could tell Ramel wasn’t that type of guy.
He was selective, and I loved a selective man.
“You first.”
“Me first, what?” I knew he was referring to my problems, but I asked anyway.
“Tell me what’s up with you. Why you mess up what could have been a perfect performance?”
“First of all, my performance was perfect enough for an open mic in some small town in Mississippi, okay? But honestly, it’s too much to fit in one night.”
“You saying you want to spend the night with me? Slow down, baby girl. We just met.”
I slapped his arm in response to that. “No, I am saying I have so many issues with my parents that it will literally take me days to explain it all. “
“Give me the highlights.”
“Well, for starters, that song wasn’t written to be performed at an open mic. I wanted to sing it for them, but they couldn’t carve one day out of their busy schedule to spend my birthday with me.”
“Damn, it’s your birthday?”
“Exactly three weeks from today.”
“Well, let’s take another shot for your birthday.”
I didn’t argue with that. As soon as the bartender brought over what we asked for, we both threw them back like it was nothing. I thought this was going to be the worst birthday of my life, but things were starting to look up.