Chapter 25
TWENTY-FIVE
EDDIE
FOUR WEEKS TO CHARON
Eddie dreamed. Of things past and future, painful and pleasurable. He dreamt of soft sheets and silken hair, neon lights scattering off polished silver. Jett was there, a calming presence, a bright and beautiful star leading Eddie through the dark.
“Ed,” a voice called from between the crowded streets and busy shops.
“Ed.”
It called him forward, drove him deeper into the heart of Neo-Tokyo where a soft breeze tousled his curly hair and cupped his face.
“Eddie,” it called once again, a siren Song that flitted forward and echoed around him. He followed, reaching out for his beloved as they whirled through the districts, a cat-and-mouse game where Jett was just outside of Eddie’s reach.
“Eddie,” Jett said from around a corner, his voice louder, stronger. “Wake up.”
Eddie drifted up through the levels of sleep, passing from dream to reality. He wanted to return, to catch Jett, to hold him in his arms and love him as he deserved.
“Farm Boy,” a voice called out as something tugged on tangled curls.
Eddie raised his head from the mattress where he’d fallen asleep.
Jett.
Turning his head, Eddie came face to face with Jett, who looked at him with absolute adoration in his big brown eyes. The bond hammered in his chest, blurring out everything except Jett and the thudding beat of his own heart.
“Jett,” he whispered, worried that if he spoke too loudly, with too much hope, Jett would disappear as he had in his dreams. Cool skin met his palm as Eddie caressed Jett’s cheek, finger twirling in a stray lock of silky hair, his thumb brushing over chapped lips and old scars.
“Is it really you?”
A small, tired smile bent his lips up, though it didn’t touch his eyes. “I’m here, Ed.” His voice was ragged, exhausted, the voice of a man who had endured death once more and came back worse for wear. “I don’t think I should be here, but I am.”
Eddie leaned forward, pushing their foreheads together. Jett was solid under his touch—too cold, too fragile, but real and tangible.
“I love you, Jett Valla,” he said. He’d said it over and over again.
Every time he entered and exited the room, when he was so overcome with emotion that he cried into Jett’s sheets, when he had nothing else to say.
He hadn’t gotten the chance while Jett was dying, but he did now.
And he wouldn’t miss any opportunity to remind Jett.
“I love you, Edward Stone.”
Eddie sobbed. He clung to Jett’s shoulders and let the tears soak his cheeks and beard and Jett’s hospital gown. He cried as Jett cradled him, as he smoothed Eddie’s hair, his voice rumbling out sweet nothings.
When Eddie calmed once more, his head hurt, his eyes stung, and his chest felt like it was going to explode. But Jett was there. Awake and alive.
“They told me that you came here every day.” Jett swallowed hard, as if he were remembering how to talk. “T-they told me about the shuttle. The way I—”
“I felt it when you died, and the pain nearly killed me. I couldn’t conceive of a life without you in it and I just…
shut down.” Eddie pushed himself up and sat beside Jett on the bed.
“I came as often as I could. Told you every little thing that happened during all those horrible meetings. I…” He trailed off, not sure what else to say.
Not sure how to describe the intensity of his grief, of his regrets, of his dawning hope for the future.
Jett grabbed Eddie’s hands and pulled them closer together. “I know. I heard you.” His eyes crawled over Eddie’s face. “I heard every word.”
Eddie kissed Jett with more force than he thought he had. It hurt, with lips and teeth smashed together, but Eddie didn’t care. He needed Jett like he needed oxygen and food. He wanted all of the man before him.
“I heard you begging me to come back,” Jett whispered against Eddie’s lips. “I heard you crying and apologizing and I couldn’t do anything about it.”
They kissed again, a tender brush of lips.
“I’m here now, Eddie, and I will never leave you again.”
“Captain Stone?” An orderly stood in the door. “There are some people here to speak with you.”
Jett leaned back in the bed, his eyes drooping. “I’m so tired, Ed. Will you be here when I wake up?”
Eddie nodded. “Yes.” He leaned down and pressed a kissed to Jett’s forehead. “I love you, Jett. Forever.”
“Forever,” Jett replied as he settled into the sheets and closed his eyes.
Eddie waited a moment longer, watched as Jett slipped softly toward sleep, then rose to see who wanted him.
“Are you sure this is what you want, Eddie?” the captain asked. There was something in his voice, some thread that hadn’t been there at the start of this rather tedious conversation. It was a tiredness and slight slur of his words.
Eddie eyed Ra’ana and the displeasure on their usually passive face. “It is quite irregular,” they said.
Eddie leaned back in the chair, stretching his hips. “Yes,” he replied with a finality that felt good, felt right. “I am certain. I have experienced the duties of a Captain—one in an emergency—and I do not want that kind of responsibility.”
“The likelihood of something like that happening again are very low.”
Eddie grimaced, realizing he would have to be very blunt to get Ra’ana off his case.
“Perhaps you do not understand what it is like to watch your partner die, but it is not an experience I wish to endure again. Nor do I have any intention of being anywhere he is not.”
The captain’s grim face softened; he nodded, eyes twinkling.
Ra’ana balked, stuttered, mumbled words too low for Eddie to comprehend. “This is a very rare opportunity that you are giving up.”
Eddie stood, tired of playing nice, tired of Ra’ana and Corporate downplaying what he’d experienced and what mattered most to him.
“I have changed my mind, actually.”
Ra’ana perked up and Eddie took some perverse pleasure at what he was going to say next.
“Instead of staying here on the Neo-Tokyo, I hereby tender my resignation from Quasar, effective the moment we dock at Charon.”
Ra’ana stared. Augustus hid a smile behind one broad hand.
“I see there is no changing your mind, so I shall get the paperwork started.” Ra’ana left without further comment.
Eddie watched them go, his shoulders finally relaxing after months or years of tension building up.
Augustus turned toward him, his smile broadening. “How long did it take for you to change your mind?”
Eddie considered the question. Many moments could have been the tipping point.
Perhaps he’d known as soon as he’d accepted the commission.
Or the moment when he’d realized the full weight of what he’d done to Jett and himself.
Or maybe it was when Jett apologized and they’d kissed and acknowledged that neither was himself without the other.
“I couldn’t say, Augustus.” He ran fingers across the weave of his pants, enjoying the subtle texture.
“But watching Jett just…die in my arms put so many things into perspective.” The captain’s own history influenced him as well, but not as much as Jett’s willingness to give them another chance, to listen and forgive and love Eddie still.
Eddie looked around the hospital lounge and decided it was time to get back to Jett. He hadn’t been away too long, but he didn’t know when Jett would wake back up.
“I am going to return to his room, if you would like to join me.”
The captain stood and shook his head. “You may have just gotten yourself out of a lot of meetings, for now. But I still have to make an appearance.” He chuckled. “Give Jett my best.”
At the door he paused and turned back. “I am proud of you, Eddie. Prouder than I have ever been.” Then he was gone.
When Eddie returned to Jett’s room, his beloved was still fast asleep. Breathing and heart rate normal, Eddie slumped down into his own chair and decided now was a good time to get some sleep.