Chapter Eighteen
Chessie
It’s nearly one-thirty, and I decide I’ve done enough work for the day.
I lock everything in the shed and head back to Dennis, then drive home.
Lisa is out, and Ria’s bedroom is still empty, so I have the house to myself.
I should have some lunch… but I’m not that hungry, so I spend a couple of hours doing some chores, including my laundry and some general cleaning and tidying.
As I move some books from the living room back to my bedroom, I spot a bag by the side of my armchair and remember that I bought some new coloring books for Thea a few days ago.
I was saving them for when I next see her again.
On impulse I decide to call in at Mark and Nina’s place.
I have time before Kingi picks me up at seven.
That way I can give Thea the books and also check up on them all and make sure they’re doing okay.
When I paid off Mark’s debt, I made it very clear to him that this was going to be the last time I would do it.
I told him I wasn’t trying to be cruel, but I’d been under a lot of pressure lately, and if I carried on I was going to make myself ill over it.
Deep down, however, I’m nervous that it made no difference, and at some point I’m going to discover that he’s been gambling again.
I talked to both him and Nina about him getting therapy for his addiction, but when it comes down to it, he has to be the driving force behind his recovery, and although he’s close, I don’t know whether he’s hit rock bottom yet.
So my heart is already racing a little when I turn onto his road… and it doesn’t improve when I see an ambulance in front of his house.
Heart hammering, I park Dennis, cursing as I hit the curb, turn off the engine, and get out. Please don’t let it be Thea… oh God…
I cross the road, only then realizing that my parents’ car is parked just down from mine, and run up the garden path to the front door. It’s open, and as I go into the hall I can hear voices to the left, in the master bedroom.
“Chessie?”
I look to the voice, which came from the living room to my right, and I walk a few steps forward. My mother is sitting on the sofa with Thea, who’s crying. When she looks up and sees me, Thea gets up, runs up to me, and throws her arms around my waist. She’s obviously not the one who’s hurt.
“What’s happened?” I ask Mum, trembling.
“It’s Mark,” Mum says. “He took an overdose.”
My jaw drops. “On purpose?”
“I don’t know.”
“Is he…” I swallow hard.
“He’s alive,” Mum says, “but unconscious.” She meets my eyes, and then she bursts into tears, covering her face with her hands.
“Oh, Mum…” I bite my lip hard so I don’t start crying as well. That’s not what she and Thea need right now. “Where’s Dad?”
“In with the paramedics,” she says in between sobs. “They’re putting Mark on a stretcher.”
“Okay.” I rub Thea’s back. “All right, sweetie, everything’s going to be okay.”
I look over as I see movement in the bedroom doorway and see a paramedic backing out, guiding one end of a stretcher.
Mark is strapped to it, and he has a drip in his arm.
They get him through the doorway, then stop in the hall.
My father comes out, his arm around Nina, whose face is white as a sheet.
I go to move Thea to my mother, but she won’t release her tight hold around me, so in the end I take a few steps toward the paramedics with her still attached. “How is he?” I ask. “I’m his sister.”
“Hello,” the first paramedic says with a warm smile as he sees Thea looking, “he’s okay, we’re going to take him to hospital and try to make him better.”
My mother stands. “Did he do it? Did he take the overdose on purpose?”
The second paramedic, a woman, also looks at Thea and says brightly, “Let’s get him to hospital, and then we can work out what happened, okay?”
I look at my father, though, and he meets my eyes and gives a faint nod. Mark tried to kill himself. Oh God.
The first paramedic says, “We’ve also taken a look at your father’s surgical wound, and we’re a bit concerned about the fact that the infection isn’t better, so we’re going to take him in as well to get him checked out.”
I’m not surprised; my father looks gray again, although that’s probably as much from the shock as from the infection. But I’m glad they’re taking it seriously.
“What should we do?” I ask. “Should we come too? What about Thea?”
Nina comes over and gives her daughter a hug. “It’s all right,” she says, “he’s going to be okay. But I need to go to the hospital with him, and I don’t want you to come.” She looks up at us pleadingly.
“Why don’t I drive you there,” Mum says immediately. “And Chessie, you can look after Thea.”
I open my mouth to object, feeling as if I should be the one doing the driving, because they’re both going to be out of their minds with worry. For the past few months I’ve been the one organizing everyone, and it feels natural for me to take charge now.
But to my surprise Mum says firmly, “It’s okay, love, I’ve got this. You’ve done enough. Nina needs to concentrate on Mark, and Thea loves being with you.” She strokes Thea’s hair. “Is that okay, sweetheart? You go and stay with Chessie for a bit?”
Thea looks up at me. “Can I?”
“Of course. Don’t worry about her,” I say to Nina. “You can call me if you want to talk to her at all. I’ll make sure she’s all right.”
“Thank you.” Nina hugs me. Then she says to her daughter, “Come on, let’s quickly pack you a bag.” The two of them go off to Thea’s room, while the paramedics continue taking Mark out on the stretcher to the ambulance.
“Are you going to be all right?” I say to Mum as she gathers her things.
“I’ll be fine.” There’s a flinty hardness to her gaze. “I can’t believe he tried to take his own life,” she says quietly. “With a young daughter. What was he thinking?” She’s not just upset. She’s furious. “I’ve had enough of this,” she snaps. “We’re going to get this sorted once and for all.”
Dad comes up, and I give him a hug too. “Are you okay?” I ask, concerned about his color. “You don’t look well.”
“It doesn’t seem right to complain when there’s all this happening,” he says, “but I feel a bit rough, I have to admit.”
“That’s the infection. I’m glad they’re taking you in, Dad.” I put my arms around him, fighting against the overwhelming urge to cry. When you’re young, you feel as if your parents can do anything, and as if they’re going to be around forever. I miss the innocence of being a child. Adulting sucks.
Nina comes out with Thea, both of them having packed bags, and there’s a flurry of activity as one of the paramedics comes back to get Dad, and Mum and Nina promise they’ll follow in the car.
Nina gives me a spare key to their house.
Then they all head off, leaving me and Thea standing there, watching them go.
I turn to Thea and give her a hug. “It’s all right,” I whisper. “Everything’s going to be okay.”
“Will we go back to your house?” she asks.
Lisa and Ria won’t mind her staying with me, although we don’t have a spare bed as such, so I guess she could have mine and I’ll sleep on the sofa.
I go to say yes, then remember that I’m supposed to be seeing Kingi this evening.
“Let’s get in the car,” I tell her, “and then I need to make a quick phone call.”
Once she’s buckled into her booster seat in the back, I call Kingi.
“Hey gorgeous,” he says.
“It’s me,” I reply, not thinking straight.
“I gathered. I don’t reply to every caller like that.”
I’m too upset to smile. “I’m not going to be able to see you tonight.” My voice has a slight waver, and I stop talking and bite my lip.
Immediately his tone turns serious. “What’s up?”
“It’s… it’s Mark. The… the ambulance has taken him to hospital, and my dad too because he’s not well, and Mum and Nina have gone in the car, but they asked me to look after Thea…”
“What happened to Mark? Was he in an accident?”
“No. He…” I’m suddenly conscious of Thea sitting in the back. Oh God. She’s only eight.
“Where are you?” Kingi asks.
“At their place.”
“Mark’s?”
“Yeah.”
“Are you okay to drive?”
“Yes, yes, I’m fine.”
“Okay. I’m heading out of Midnight now.” I hear his footsteps, and him calling out to his PA that he’s leaving for the day. “You know where I live, right?”
“Um…”
“Matapana Road near Palm Beach. The house is called Kārearea.” It’s a New Zealand falcon, sleek, fast, and rare. It doesn’t surprise me he picked that. “You can stay the night,” he says. “I have several spare rooms.”
My eyes sting. “You don’t have to do that…”
“I want to. You sound like you need a hug.”
“I do.” I sniff.
“Good.” He’s smiling. “I’ll meet you there in about fifteen minutes, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Drive carefully.” He ends the call.
I program the location into Google Maps, then look over my shoulder at Thea. “You remember Kingi?” She nods. “We’re going to go and stay with him for the night. Is that okay? He lives in a big house overlooking the beach.”
“Okay.”
I start the car and head off into the traffic.
“Mum said you and Kingi were engaged,” Thea says. “Are you going to marry him?”
Suddenly, I can’t bring myself to lie to her. I know there was a clause in the contract that said I mustn’t tell anyone, and if I tell her, she’ll probably tell her mum, but right now I don’t care about that. I know with certainty that Kingi won’t mind.
“I’m going to tell you a secret, okay? I’m not going to ask you not to tell your mum and dad because that wouldn’t be fair, but not many know this. Kingi and I are pretending to be engaged.”
“Why?”
As I drive, I explain about the Foundation, and that the board told him it would be best if he was in a committed relationship. And I tell her that he asked me to be his fake fiancée in return for money.
“I wanted to help him,” I say, “and I also wanted to help your parents, and Grandma and Grandpa, and the business. So I said yes.”
“Couldn’t he have just loaned you the money?” she asks sagely. “If he’s really rich?”
“He would have given me the money,” I say softly. “But I didn’t feel comfortable taking it from him without giving something in return.”
“Why?”
I consider her question, looking at the trees to the left of Pacific Parade as I drive.
“Money is an odd thing,” I say slowly. “Everyone says it doesn’t buy happiness.
But the truth is that it does. Or at least, it buys comfort and contentment and peace of mind.
Those who do have it will never understand what it’s like to struggle without it.
There’s this assumption that you’re poor because you’re not working as hard as they do.
Or you’re not as dedicated as they are. Do you know what it means when you say someone is superior? ”
“They think they’re better than you?”
“Yes, that’s right.”
“Is that what Kingi’s like?”
I open my mouth to reply. Then I close it again. To say yes would be unfair, because he’s not like that at all. “No,” I say eventually. “He’s not. I… I think the fault’s mine, actually. He called me an inverted snob, and I think he’s right.”
“What does that mean?”
“It’s a person who criticizes things liked by people who they see as richer or cleverer than them. I was self-conscious going to the Midnight Club. I thought I stood out because I’m not wealthy or university educated. He said I’m the only one who was bothered by that.”
“Was he right?”
“No… Everyone is very conscious of where they are in the social ladder. We all know when other people are richer than we are, or better educated. It’s impossible to hide the fact that we don’t have money or education, so we say we’re proud of being where we are, and claim we’re content to stay there. ”
“Everyone wants to be rich,” she says.
I smile at her in the mirror. “Yes, you’re right.”
“I don’t understand something.”
“What’s that, sweetheart?”
“You gave Dad money didn’t you? To give to the men to pay off the loans?”
“Yes.”
“Then why wasn’t he happy? Why did he take those pills?”
My throat tightens. “I don’t know. But it’s important that you know it’s nothing you’ve done.”
“I know. Mum said he’s mentally ill.”
“Yes. It sounds horrible, I know. It just means something isn’t working right in his brain, that’s all. It’s nobody’s fault.”
According to Google Maps, we’re close to Kingi’s house, so I slow Dennis, then indicate to turn onto Kingi’s drive. It snakes behind some trees, then turns back on itself, and the house opens up before us.
Fuck me.
It’s enormous. As I park and get out, I can see it’s on the top of a slope. The back of the house, where we are, is on one level, and the front that overlooks the ocean is on two. The view is going to be magnificent.
I get Thea’s bag out of the back, only then realizing that I should have gone home first and collected some of my own clothes. Oh well. It’s only for one night. Hopefully he’ll have a spare toothbrush I can borrow.
Thea gets out, and I lock the door and take her hand. Together we walk along the path that curves around the side and descends to what appears to be the front door.
“He’s like a king,” she says, wide-eyed, as we ring the doorbell.
“Don’t tell him that to his face,” I advise. “He won’t be able to get his head out of the door.”
She giggles, and then we hear footsteps, and the door opens.
My brain’s been busy with other things today, so I haven’t thought much about our kiss this morning. But as I see him standing there, dressed in a white tee and navy shorts, brown-skinned and dark-haired and gorgeous, I feel a wave of longing so fierce it takes my breath away.
“Hey,” I say, my voice a squeak.
He meets my eyes, then looks at Thea and smiles. “Hey, honey. It’s great to see you. Come in.”
To my surprise, she goes up to him and slides her arms around him, burying her face in his chest.
“Aw…” He meets my eyes, his brows drawing together. There’s obviously something about him that makes her feel safe and comfortable. He puts his arms around her and hugs her back, then he holds an arm out to me. I join them in the hug, letting him engulf us both.