Chapter 17
“Gray!” I exclaim, throwing my arms around his neck.
I forget there are hundreds of guests and the bosses watching us tonight.
He towers over me but not in the intimidating way Father does.
Even if Gray doesn’t have Jasper’s easygoing smile, seeing him in his indigo vest and long black overcoat with the hawk pin fastened to his chest makes me feel like I’m home again.
After a stuffy pause, his muscular arms envelop me, and I inhale the scent of pine trees and salt.
I’m still Leith’s little sister, even if Leith isn’t around anymore.
From the silks, Ivander watches Gray warily. My brow furrows until my gaze returns to the hawk pendant on his coat, and I step back from him. “What are you doing here?” I ask.
“I finally convinced my parents to bring me. We boarded at one of the port stops a few days ago. We’re only here for a two-week cruise.
” Gray runs a hand through his hair, separating the golden strands with his fingers.
“I came here for you. I had to make sure you were okay.” His voice lowers.
“And there are things you should know now that you’re aboard. ”
I open my mouth to ask what he means, but he stops me with a curt shake of his head. “Not here. Not when so many are watching and listening.”
“How did you convince your parents?” I ask.
“My parents agreed it was the proper way to celebrate my promotion. I’m captain of the Hawks now.”
Although I’m surprised Father didn’t tell me he planned to promote Gray, I ignore the sting. Just another thing Father didn’t share with me. “That’s incredible. I’m sure your parents are proud.” There’s something off about the already stiff set of his jaw. “You do want to be captain, right?”
Without answering, he takes my hand and leads me out onto the dance floor.
Gray ignores my protests, and I have to hope none of the bosses can see us.
We’re caught between staff members and guests alike.
I am shielded by the opulence of our guests.
A woman with deep brown skin wears a large gown with glowing lavender Riven Blossom petals woven into the full skirt.
A man who witnessed the flight activity disaster avoids my gaze as he swings his partner around and dips him.
The man’s coat fans out in what look like brilliant red wings.
I glimpse Zora sneaking a quick dance with Isla while Isla tries to run back to the kitchen.
After a long pause, Gray answers, “Of course. It’s just … a lot of responsibility.”
There was a time when Gray’s brow was unlined, and his words were carefree.
His soft green eyes and freckled skin remind me of summer days the three of us used to spend outside in the glades of Carodmoor Forest in Credence.
We’d bring a picnic lunch so heavy that Gray and Leith had to carry it together.
They’d tell me to look for flowers in the woods and make out while I was gone.
At least, that’s what Leith insisted they were doing.
Gray would roll his eyes and tell me they were only talking.
When I’d bring them the flowers, Gray would make me a flower crown with wire from the picnic basket.
As we sway together, I want to ask him if he remembers days like those, too, but I don’t. Something’s shifted. The last time I saw him, I was fleeing my own home on horseback. Now, I’m dodging a guest swinging under her partner’s arm. “It’s so good to see you.”
Gray hangs his head. “I would have been here sooner, but I thought it might not be the best idea to distract you in your first two weeks. The news from Tamarynth is … concerning.” His lips press in a tight line. “I never wanted you here. Morphics die here.”
“It’s okay,” I stammer, surprised. Anxiety makes my limbs tingle.
I don’t know what news he brought me, but it worries me that he came all the way here.
Gray was always higher strung than my brother but not like this.
I want to put him at ease. “Really, I think I’m getting the hang of being a staff member now. ”
Gray lets out a long breath, and his eyes hold mine like he wants to say more. “I promise I’ll explain everything when I can, but for now, be careful.” His voice lowers to a whisper. “Please don’t give them a reason to hurt you.” He spins me around fast as his parents come into view.
I’m not sure what he’s talking about, and dread hardens into frustration.
With bosses and his parents around, who knows when he’ll be able to pull me aside and explain what’s going on in Tamarynth.
Turning to fire off a slew of questions, I find that he’s rejoined the crowd.
His golden hair bobs as he reunites with his parents, no doubt getting in trouble with them for speaking to me.
My hands shake at my sides. Gray never needed an excuse to talk to me before.
He was proud to be seen with Lady Roe Damarcus.
Not anymore. Now I’m a social pariah. A prisoner of the same ship he vacations aboard.
Tears sting the corners of my eyes, but I blink hard to clear them.
The reminder of home was wonderful for a moment, and now it’s exactly what I don’t want.
I stalk to the banquet table, wiping my cheeks.
If he’s going to give me cryptic warnings and then run off to his parents, I’m not going to spend another moment thinking about him.
That’s a lie. I do think about him. About home. About Father.
Everything’s not as it seems. No kidding. I knew next to nothing when I came here. But even if he’s stopped believing I have any chance at surviving long enough for my retrial, I haven’t.
The banquet table is on the far side of the room, close to the doors that lead to the hallways and upper-class rooms. It’s weighed down with meats, cheeses, and vegetables, but the showstoppers are clearly the dishes you can only find aboard the Celestial: Ranzin roast stews, featuring its namesake spice blend that’s legendary among the upper class, served in golden goblets.
Roasted hearth fruits stuffed with goat cheese and herbs, flaky pastries lathered with Sarryndarian spiced honey, and chocolates that bloom into delicate flowers when touched all perch on gilded plates.
Kalenar Kurls, an upscale play on the province’s popular street food, feature the finest beef skewered on daggers designed to cook the meat to the guest’s desired temperature when grasped by the hilt.
The chefs have outdone themselves tonight.
I wonder if Isla or Niko have gotten votes like Alana has.
It occurs to me that Alana may be the only one from our group to get a retrial at the end of this month.
Even if Ivander refuses his nomination, it doesn’t mean he can give it to one of us.
The thought ruins my appetite, and I retreat from the table to the long windows overlooking the dark indigo sea.
The inky, blackish-blue depths lap calmly beneath me. The reflections of stars twinkle in the water, giving it the luminescent quality so commonly found aboard the Celestial. The sensation of floating over a tranquil, moving world makes me think of the spirits in the after.
What does it feel like for them in the world between life and the beyond?
There are rules in resurrection. Spirits can give no specific information about the after—the world beyond.
When I access the spirit plane, I see no more than the spirits themselves and the energies willing to accompany me back to Tamarynth.
Riveners are the ones leading spirits back and forth between the spirit realm and the after.
There’s beauty in that unknown for me. That there’s a world beyond the spiritual plane even I can’t touch.
I used to envision Leith as an explorer of the after, on an adventure so exciting he couldn’t come back to me for a visit.
It made it easier to accept when I’d try to conjure him and get no response.
I’m planning to check on Asralyn and Vance when a boss I don’t recognize bumps my shoulder.
At first, he must think I’m a guest because his lips form an apologetic smile, and he hands me a drink.
Surprised, I take it from him and sip the midnight-blue liquid.
It’s sweet upon first taste but fades to a note of bitterness.
I wait for some magical enhancement, but nothing happens.
The boss’s face twists into a disapproving scowl as he realizes I’m not a guest. “If you’re just going to stand around and drink, you can check the deck for guests. Make sure no one’s wandering.”
“I’m supposed to be with my family—”
“I don’t want to hear your excuses. Go, now.” The boss slurps a spoonful of ranzin roast from a gold goblet, then snatches the drink back with his free hand.
Muttering under my breath, I inch toward the doors leading out of the ballroom. With his eyes still on me, I commit to making one quick sweep around the perimeter before I go back and find the Stallards. I can’t risk being away from them for too long.
I push open the doors and edge outside. There’s open space here in front of the hallways that lead to the guest rooms. The farther I get from the ballroom, the more goose bumps gather on my arms. No one’s supposed to leave the ballroom and bar area unsupervised.
If guests want to go back to their rooms for any reason, they must be accompanied by a staff member. Luckily, I see no one in my quick pass.
I’m about to head back when I hear a heavy sob from a hallway leading to the guest rooms. My better judgment begs me to return to the ballroom and forget about the sound, but I don’t listen.
Heels clicking against the black marble floor, I walk to the mouth of the hallway.
My footprints leave a vibrant violet imprint in the floor.
A sharp sob sounds again, and I whirl around. I find a girl crouched on the floor near a hallway. As far as I know, we’re reasonably safe in the pocket of space between the hallway and the ballroom, but I’m eager to get her back inside.
“Hey,” I whisper. When the girl lifts her head, I recognize her coarse chestnut hair and the freckles across her nose.
“Elayne? What are you doing out here?” I glance to the nearby hallway.
We don’t have time to talk, not here. I wonder where her two friends are, the girls from the flying experience. “Let’s get you inside.”
Elayne shakes her head and pulls her knees tight to her chest. The poufy skirt of her topaz dress forms a defensive cloud of fabric around her thin frame.
“Please. It’s not safe to be in the hallways at night. You know that.” When she doesn’t move, I kneel on the ground beside her, although it’s difficult in my constraining silver dress. “Hey, I didn’t save you from falling into the sea to watch you get eaten by a hallway.”
Her face blanches, and she hugs her knees even tighter.
I swallow and tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. “Kidding. Where are your friends?”
Her body shakes. I may need to call for help.
She points with a trembling hand to the hallway, the one leading to the guest rooms. “I was just trying to explore the ship a little. I hate fancy parties.” She pauses, quivering fingers pulling at a loose bead on her bodice.
“But that hallway smelled like rotting corpses and … the walls were covered in blood, I think.”
This is bad. She shouldn’t have gone by herself.
Where were the illusives who were supposed to make that hallway appear normal?
They must have had to rotate after expending so much energy.
Elayne was probably walking as they changed shifts.
“Well, you’re out of there now. If you need to leave the ballroom again, make sure a staff member’s with you. They can make it … manageable.”
Elayne pinches her arm, as if to wake herself from a nightmare. “A creature with black wings sat at the end of the hallway and kept coaxing me toward him. I wanted to get closer. I don’t know why. He gave me something to drink and then I ended up here.”
Panic rises in the back of my throat. “Let me take you to the med-bay.”
Elayne’s eyes meet mine. They’re wide and green, glistening with tears.
She opens her mouth to answer, but her body goes rigid.
The shaking stops, and her crouched body jolts into an immobile, stiff position.
Unable to stay sitting up, she falls over.
I try to catch her, but she’s too heavy.
As she lies in a rigid fetal position, blood begins to run from her eyes, ears, and mouth.
Tears sting my eyes. I can’t breathe. It feels too much like my deathmare.
No. I already saved this girl once. I won’t let her get hurt again.
With a trembling hand, I reach out and seize Elayne’s stiff fingers, the only comfort I can give her now. My muscles twitch with adrenaline. I tilt my head up and scream.